It's been four days since Sei-chan agreed to let me talk with him more. Since then, I've spent almost all of my breaks with him rather than sitting in the science classroom alone. And as much as I don't want to admit it, it has been more… fun. Perhaps he was right, when he more or less suggested that I should get some friends with his contract.
Speaking of the contract, I haven't been able to make to much progress so far. So far, I've only managed to gain one friend. I'll give you two guesses. No, it isn't Sei-chan. It's Otsubo-san. Or I suppose maybe I should start calling her Ueno-chan. I don't think she would mind. While we are talking about… Ueno-chan, I should give her credit for convincing me to go talk to Sei-chan about hanging out with him more. After she agreed to be my friend, the conversation shifted to Sei-chan. Ueno-chan actually knows a surprising amount about him, I guess it's not actually that surprising when you realise they've been on the Student Council together for two years. She mentioned something along the lines of, 'he doesn't look as happy when he is not with you'. Ueno-chan seems to think that Sei-chan enjoys spending time with me more than he lets on. I for one have no clue how she worked that out, considering he rarely shows any emotion whatsoever, but Ueno-chan is surprisingly observant, so as a gesture of friendship I took her word for it.
After class ended that day, I went to Sei-chan's classroom to ask if I could spend more time with him, and if he could be my friend. I think he would be proud of how I didn't outright say what I was doing. If I had, he probably would have turned me down immediately. And while he did agree to let me talk to him more, he still hasn't gotten back to me on whether I can consider him a friend. To be honest, it's unsettling for Sei-chan to be so indecisive. I have never seen him take longer than an hour or two to make a decisive decision before. And it has now been four days.
But as I said, it has been fun spending almost every day since with him. I've met lots of different people, and got an idea of how someone as strange as Sei-chan can be as popular as he is. It's like he wears a mask in front of other people. An ever changing one, built to suit any user. He can turn around and contradict something he said three minutes ago to someone else. It is incredible to watch. The way he changes his personality so completely depending on who he is talking to surprises and intrigues me.
I asked him about how he does it once. He said that everyone views you in a way that fits their own desires, so he just emphasises these parts for each person, making him incredibly likable to anyone he meets. And he can do this because of his ability to create accurate judgements about a person in a mere two-minute conversation. Because of that, he fits in with just about any social clique in the school.
While I have met a lot of people, I can't bring myself to approach them, and attempt to become friends. Mostly this is because I don't like a lot of them, but even the ones I can find something to like about, and I think I would enjoy their company, I'm still too nervous and shy to start up a conversation. I thought Sei-chan might help me in this sort of situation, but now that I think about it, it would've been surprising if he had helped me. After all, he wanted me to find the three or four friends needed to fulfil the contract by myself, so of course he isn't going to introduce me to potential friends.
So for the last few days, my time has been spent like this. In class, I talk with Ueno-chan, and in-between breaks and sometimes after school, I spend my time with Sei-chan. Today is a Saturday, so a half-day at school. Having only four periods before I go home, I thought would feel different this time, but it doesn't really. Before now, I didn't like Saturdays, because it meant I had to go back home earlier in the day, but now I don't like Saturdays because I have less time to spend with Sei-chan and Ueno-chan.
Interval today, I plan to spend with Sei-chan. Most likely, we'll be taking most of it talking with a certain clique, who are certainly the blandest, and most boring group in the school. For some reason they all think they're really important and above everyone else, even though I think they must revolt everyone else. There is nothing unique about them, and they don't even seem to be that good friends with each other. I suppose I find that somewhat interesting about them. It reminds me of the kind of people I used to hang out with in Junior High. There's actually a pretty good chance that at least one of them is someone I used to know in Junior High, but if so I certainly don't remember them. I doubt even if any of them realized who I am, they would speak up. There's a bit of mutual hatred here.
As expected, Sei-chan is waiting for me outside his class. We decided that this would be the best place to meet up, as Sei-chan often is held behind in class, or has a meeting to attend. Today, he has no meetings to attend, at least not this break.
"Sorry to keep you waiting," I say as a greeting, "are we hanging out with that group again today?"
He knows what I mean when I say 'that group', and you probably do as well.
Sei-chan smiles in reply, "as much as I know you enjoy spending time with them, I actually have something else to do today. I think you'll find it interesting to say the least."
I smile when I here Sei-chan say that. He never jokes like that with anyone else. With anyone else, it just sounds completely different when he says that. Its' a part of his mask when he jabs at anyone else, but with me he's able to talk normally, communicate with me in a way that he finds impossible with anyone else.
It makes me feel special, I suppose. I don't know if that's important or anything, but it makes me feel like an important part of him, and that makes me happy. He's the one person in the world I enjoy being around, so I suppose it makes sense that being important would make me happy. It just confirms to me that I'm not going to be thrown away or replaced. I wouldn't want to be abandoned by him, the way he abandons everyone else when he no longer has a use for them. The way I abandoned my old friends.
"So? What are we doing then?"
"Information gathering."
Sei-chan gets a text message on his phone. He gave me his phone number the other day. Thinking on it now, it seems kind of weird that it took us more than a year to exchange numbers. But we never really needed to previously, as we only ever met once a week, and it was always at the same time. Other than that, we never had any contact, not matter how much I wanted to talk to him. I still haven't used it though, because funnily enough, we still haven't needed it. I'm sure I'll use it eventually, but not right now. It would feel weird to use it for no good reason.
"We're going to the gym."
"Huh? What for?"
Sei-chan smiled, "you'll see?"
When we entered the gymnasium, I looked around to see why it was that Sei-chan needed to come here so immediately that he would change his plans. The girl's basketball team is practicing, or at least that's what I assume it is, but I can't see anyone on the team that would interest Sei-chan or anything like that. Definitely not anyone that would drastically change his plans.
"Up here."
Sei-chan signals me to follow him up the stairs. It has been so long since I was here, that I'd forgotten they exist. Up the stairs, the school has a mediocre supply of old gym equipment and some bleachers. I still have no clue why we are here. Once we are up the stairs, I see that there is a single person sitting in the bleachers. I immediately connect at least some of the dots. Sei-chan's phone got a text message, presumably from this person, telling him to meet here. For what? Who knows. If I remember correctly, I believe Sei-chan said something about information, but what kind of information?
The somewhat suspicious looking person notices our footsteps as we approach.
"Tohsaka-kun, glad to see you again. And Yasuraoka-san, it's good to see you."
I'm taken aback by the greeting. The stranger, a boy, addresses me as if we have met previously. It somewhat takes me aback, but also makes me want to distance myself from him. Who is this guy? If he addresses me like that, perhaps he is someone I knew from back at Junior High, or perhaps even elementary school. Like I said, I wouldn't remember if that was the case, as I can't remember any of their faces, and most of their names are gone with them. And I doubt any of the people I hung out with back when, ended up like him.
"Isogai-san, I'm sorry to say but there is a lot I need to get done today, I need to get this over with quickly. It would be appreciated if we could hurry."
Isogai-san, as Sei-chan refers to him as, doesn't seem to be at all interested in speeding up the process, and in fact seems to be taking a greater interest in me rather than Sei-chan, which is something I've dealt with a lot this week, but there is something different about the way he looks at me.
"So what's the deal with you and Tohsaka-kun? Friends? Lovers? Relatives? A mix of those? If that's the case, I'd really prefer not to know."
"I thought you of all people wouldn't have to ask a question like that, Isogai-san."
Sei-chan replies rather sternly and coldly. He clearly has no patience for whatever game Isogai-san is playing.
Isogai-san raises his hands up defensively, "I've actually not looked into it as much as I otherwise might have, out of respect for our business partnership. You said something about having a job for me?"
Business partnership?
Sei-chan's livid look is more thinly masked than usual for a moment there, but he recovers to his usual self quite quickly.
"Yes. Tomoyo Shimotsuki-san, Class 2-A. Find out anything and everything you can about her, she's proving herself a nuisance."
"Tomoyo Shimotsuki-san… oh, the transfer student in your class, right, got it. Anything in particular I should look for?"
I'm left here standing next to Sei-chan, listening to their conversation, and wondering what exactly they are talking about. Tomoyo Shimotsuki-san is the girl Sei-chan sits next to in class, and also just from watching him, I can tell he doesn't enjoy talking to her, yet she seems to constantly force herself upon him. From what I can tell, Sei-chan somehow wants Isogai-san to gain some sort of information on her, that would take her out of the picture, so to speak. How he is going to do that is the mystery here.
"Anything damaging to her reputation. Preferably enough to remove her from what you might call the 'inner circle'."
Isogai-san nods, "okay, I understand. I'll see what I can do, but I can't make any guarantees I'll be successful. But before that…"
Isogai-san reaches out his hand, and lays it flat, palm facing up. Sei-chan reaches into the pocket of his school jacket, and pulls out money. And when I say money, I don't mean the sort of pocket change you take to the school canteen, but a fair amount was there. Not the amount you might see in some American movie or something, but it looked like enough to… buy the whole menu at a takeaway place. That was a bad example, wasn't it? Sorry, couldn't come up with anything better on the spot. But anyway, you get the idea (or at least I hope you do).
The money is handed over and we leave.
I get the sense I shouldn't talk until we're away from the gym. It just would feel awkward for some reason. So I wait until we've left the gym to start talking.
"Who is he?"
"Isogai Naoto is something of an information gatherer," Sei-chan explains, "he's almost a walking social media network. He listens into conversations, hacks into computers, phones etc. He puts his entire life aside when given a task, he'll have something for me first thing next week."
This seems incredibly wrong. I'm sure Sei-chan knows that. Quite certain that it even steps over a, no, many legal boundaries, but that doesn't even make me want to think about stopping it. It makes me feel slightly twisted inside, because it excites me. Yeah, it makes me feel sick inside. At myself.
"So your paying him to give you information so that you can blackmail Shimotsukaya?"
"Shimotsuki, and I'm paying him to not record who asked him to do this, he would do it for the fun of it if I just asked."
"Record?"
"Isogai-san has a journal, I believe he carries with him, that details everything he's ever done for other people. Well, other than me."
I suppose that makes sense. If I go down, you go down with me. But, it seems odd that he's fine with leaving his pages blank if you give him just ten or twenty thousand yen. He seems to have a respect for Sei-chan, probably because he's likely a regular customer, so maybe that convinced him to set a lower price. Or maybe he's just a teenager, and desperate for cash. That seems more likely, thinking about it.
"So, where are we going for the rest of break?"
*
Break comes to an end. We ended up spending what was left of it with the group I mentioned before. You know, the boring ones. With the break ending, I remember that this'll be the last time I see Sei-chan this week. And that makes me remember that there is something important that I still don't know.
"Sei-chan. You still haven't given me an answer."
His face becomes straighter, more serious, business-like. He knows exactly what answer I want. The question I asked him four days ago.
Are you a friend?
When I got home, I went straight to my room. It's warm. The sun always hits it in the afternoon. By the time I get home, even on Saturdays with the earlier finishes, it is already frying. The sun catches anything I've left out. Unfinished fizzy drink, laundry. Yeah, my room's actually pretty disgusting. The sun catches this, and produces a pretty powerful, pungent odour. I open both windows as much as possible, even though it's quite cold outside, then I lie on my bed for a while. As usual my mind floats to one of the few things I find enjoyable in my life, this time talking with Sei-chan. I recall our last conversation, and the last thing he said to me.
I'm not sure if this is friendship, after all I don't have any real friends, but you can count me as your friend for now.
I smile.
I'm sure Sei-chan could explain why, but just that one sentence makes me happier than I can write with words. Happier than I've been since before I lost all my friends. Huh? This is weird. My vision is going blurry, maybe I'm crying. I don't think I've ever cried with happiness before. Its' a weird feeling. It makes me laugh. My laugh comes out in a coughing fit. Could've seen that coming. Oh great, now I've got hiccups.
But, I feel better than I have in years. And it's all thanks to Sei-chan. I would consider getting him a present, but I don't have any money. That seems like a good idea. Sei-chan would accept a present, I think, although I don't know if he would ever give anyone a present. Unless he gained from it somehow, of course. I'm sure he would accept one though. He's surprisingly courteous and respectful. Even if he found it incredibly revolting for whatever reason, he would accept it with a straight face, just because it's better for everyone that way.
Maybe I should ask Ueno-chan what I should do. It really is hard to think of something when I have no money to buy anything, and was completely clueless in the first place.
My family is hosting some kind of get together, or so it would seem. My dad broke the barrier between my room and the rest of the house to inform me. To be honest, I wasn't sure that that is what it was, until I heard the voices downstairs. After all, I didn't really listen and just made grunting noises to make it sound like I was engaging in his conversation whenever I heard him pause. He was probably trying to convince me to come downstairs and join them. As if that was ever going to happen.
I decided to play games instead, but the noise is distracting, even listening to music with my earphones in. It got me thinking who it might be downstairs. Perhaps family friends, work colleagues of my dad's, could even be my cousins. I wonder if I would recognise them. I wonder if they would recognise me. Okay, that's depressing. I'm getting distracted from my game, so time to stop thinking about that.
By the time I'm tired enough to sleep, it's past midnight. The guests are all long gone, and the rest of my family is asleep. My eyes are squinting, after hours of looking at the illuminated computer screen. It's only then that I realise I haven't eaten since I got home from school.