* * *
''I quit.''
''I can't.''
Here we go again.
His tone was cold, as if he meant it.
She had every right to be. It wasn't every day that we went back and forth like this, but I think we've only done it three or four times this week, so it's better than usual.
''This is the twentieth time this week alone. The priest has declared himself off duty, so please consider my position of having to pander to him every time.''
----It's weird.
It's unlikely that a faithful nun would speak falsehoods beneath a chapel that is the temple of God. I wondered if there were any comrades of the same sex in this monastery who were in the same predicament as me. I knew it was a highly unlikely scenario, but I hoped so.
''Sister. It was only this time that I realized that the title of saintess' exclusive guardian priestess was a title that didn't fit my body in the first place. That it's just a yoke that the Lord has put on me for a while.''
''Of course it is.''
''Nothing rusts an organization more than having an incompetent man at the helm. It's not too late to change that old cog that is me.''
''Indeed.''
''I thank you for understanding my meaning. Sister. I'm indebted to you, and if our paths cross again some day, we'll meet again, so farewell.''
''Aye. Take care. ''Guardian Priestess Reyes. Don't forget to be back in time for the Saintess's breakfast tomorrow.''
Conversation running parallel lines as usual. The sight of the saintess with her gaze fixed on the pile of papers in front of her, even after hearing my desperate plea, was like looking at an impregnable iron fortress, but I couldn't bend my will here.
I must shed this heavy title that weighs down my frail flesh if I am to have a moment of peace that I cannot remember the last time I experienced.
Poof.
I gently dropped the envelope with the word "resignation" scrawled across it on Sister's desk. I thought about throwing it out cold like I had seen in a drama once, but I realized that would be a bit much, so I saved it.
''Since you've gone to such lengths to prepare this, you must be quite sincere this time.''
''I've always been sincere.''
I've always wanted to quit wholeheartedly, with all my heart.
''May I ask why?''
Tapping the bottom of her desk with her office fountain pen, she asked me, her frustration subtly evident. The question was legitimate.
Being the guardian priest of an unknown saintess is a position of great honor among those who serve the gods, a title more prestigious than that bestowed by a king, and a position that is often referred to as the right hand of God.
Who would be foolish enough to tear up a winning lotto ticket?
Such doubts were evident in the pupils of the nun's eyes as she watched my movements.
''Hmph. As the eldest grandson, I'm supposed to carry on the family line.''
''That's strange, weren't you born in an orphanage?''
''Well, actually, I was offered a graduate student position by a professor I knew as a student----.''
''But you dropped out of the academy.''
''You have a fiancée in your hometown---- who is sworn to be your future----.''
''You must be the one who didn't get to hold a girl's hand in Changguan, where you were forcibly dragged by your classmates on your bar mitzvah day.''
''----I did hold her hand.''
As my hastily concocted schemes were dismissed one after another, a drop of cold sweat running down my spine alerted me to the crisis.
''Hagiya, for a nun who has memorized every detail of the Saintess and her entourage, down to the number of tattoos on her body, my personal information as the Saintess's exclusive guardian priest would be a one-point multiple choice question.
Flimsy lies don't work. However, I couldn't muster up the courage to tell her the truth.
Lately, the saintess's touching has gone too far, and I no longer feel I can sustain myself as a cleric, and I want to resign as a guardian priest.
I can't imagine being able to tell someone else the unspeakable truth.
I'd be lucky if I wasn't thought of as a delusional madman, and perhaps hauled before the Inquisition for dishonoring a saintess.
Moreover, just yesterday, I had been blessed by the saintess out of the blue, and the gaps in my memory caused by being unconscious for a few hours were adding fuel to the fire of the aforementioned anxiety.
Right before I lost consciousness, I begged like a damsel in distress in a humiliation novel, but judging by her previous behavior, she probably did it.
As soon as I regained consciousness, I tucked myself into my top and looked up to see Saintess's face, asleep as a rabbit in a burrow, I realized, as much as I didn't want to, that I had to hate her.
The priest who is supposed to protect the saintess has taken her lips, albeit unintentionally.
I must leave this country as soon as possible. Immediately afterward, the only thought circuit running through my body was that.
''It doesn't matter why, the position is undeserved by the likes of me in the first place. I know my own limitations best. There are plenty of people around who can replace me, and I'm sure there's someone better than me, but with my meager abilities, I'll be a hindrance rather than a shield for the saintess. There's no way that Sister doesn't know that, if not anyone else.''
''Hah----.''
As if she couldn't take it anymore, Sister places a hand on her wrinkled brow.
''I know. I'm well aware of it. There's nothing faster than dealing with someone who is constantly self-deprecating. But what can I do, if I don't do this, I'm going to bury my bones here, physically, of course.
''Very well, your resignation. I'll have it repaired.''
''In my homeland, we have a saying that eagles don't catch flies. It means that to each his own, a job for each his own---- what's that----?''
''I said that I would approve your retirement.''
''Excuse me---- I, really----?''
''Yes. It's the doctrine of our Order to turn away those who come and not hold on to those who go, and it would be a great loss to us to lose such a valuable person as you, but if you're so sure of your intentions, there's nothing more I can say.''
I was dumbfounded by the Sister's cool demeanor.
Normally, I would have argued with her for dozens of minutes before she would have called the other priests to remove me, crying and begging, but she granted my request so simply.
After ten tries, and no tree is immune, my sincerity has finally reached the heavens.
He controlled the overwhelming emotion welling up inside his chest with his breath and thanked the benefactor who had bestowed the greatest favor of his life.
''Go, thank you, Sister!''
''You're welcome, but in return, may I ask you a favor?''
''Yes! Of course! It's a favor from you, Sister, and no one else! I'll do anything within my power!''
''Then, please deliver this letter to the post office on my behalf, by gryphon mail.''
''Yes! I see, you mean the griffon mail!''
Before the nun could change her mind, she coldly accepted the letter, which was a luxurious item at first glance.
The paper, the envelope, the perfume, all of them were luxurious items that were only used to send to people related to the royal family, and since it was sent by the fastest griffon mail in the system, it was not hard to guess that it was a letter of great urgency.
''This is a very precious letter, and you must take great care of it, and if you should happen to tamper with it, I will make sure that the matter of the resignation of the full-time guardian priest I just mentioned never happened.''
''That, such an important letter---- is, by any chance, related to the royal family----.''
''No, sir. It's a letter that has nothing to do with the royal family and is strictly for my personal use.''
''What? What does that mean----.''
A chill silence passed between me and the nun, like a chill on a bitter winter's day, stopping my thoughts for a moment.
Then, like a drop of water on a lake, a soft voice caught my consciousness.
''A very personal---- to a party of well-known adventurers in these islands, who are desperately searching for the whereabouts of a priest who has suddenly gone missing.
''Filth is incineration-!!!''
It was a reflexive action to protect myself. I hurriedly threw the letter in my hand towards the nearest brazier.
Eagle Eagle. It didn't take long for the letter to burn beyond recognition, but there was no doubt that my breathing had stopped during that split second when the pure white paper was reduced to ashes.
The information that slipped out of the nun's mouth was as shocking to me as it was to her.
''Uh---- how!''
''Since you've burned the letter, we'll pretend that your resignation as Guardian Priest never happened, as promised, Priest.''
''How the hell did you do that----!''
''Or should I call you this? ''I'm a former member of the Warrior Party. Priest Rages Lowville.''
* * * *