Between Books And Blades

Shit, shit, shit.I look at my phone and see it's nine thirty in the morning. Great. My first class was at eight and I've already missed it. I am majoring in pre med and my first class was physics which is a class you don't want to miss. I groan as I get out of bed. I have a meeting at ten with the head coach of the hockey team. This I cannot be late for.On the bright side, missing class gives me more time to gather my bearings and prepare for the meeting. I can't fuck this up. I have played hockey since I was little and it was the whole reason I came to this college to begin with. I was five years old when I first started hockey. I remember seeing the men and women who were in college playing hockey, showing us how to balance on our skates, and knew one day that I would be just like them. Now I am eighteen years old and hopefully going to join a hockey team.I am from Pleasantville, New York and in my senior year of high school, and my last year of hockey, I was scouted by the coach from the University of Vermont. University of Vermont was not my first pick for college, but seeing that they were a D1 school I knew it would get me one step closer to my goal.When the coach first came and talked to me I was worried about how I would be able to pay for school since my parents were not fans of me pursuing hockey and wanted me to attend a community college. They had told me that if I wanted to go out of state I would have to find a way to pay for it myself. Iforuntanely graduated high school as valedictorian with a 4.0 GPA and a degree in Arts and Sciences. This allowed me an opportunity to obtain an academic scholarship that pays for me to be here.As for my apartment that I share with my best friend, Liv, I will have to get a job to pay for it. I am a freshman and most freshmen live in the dorms, I however got lucky and was able to live with Liv off campus in an apartment that is only 10 minutes away from campus. Before I had moved in, Liv had lived alone and was working three jobs on top of school to be able to afford to live here. Liv grew up poor and her parents had no money to help her with college.Liv is two years older than me but has been my best friend since I was in sixth grade and she was in eighth grade. So far she is my only friend here at school until I get out more and meet people on my own.I quickly get ready, throw on some clothes, and rush downstairs where I see Liv in our kitchen. Our apartment is decent size and we have tried out best with the little money we have to make our apartment a home. We spent a lot of time at thrift stores and looking online to get appliances and furniture."Glad to see you're awake. I heard your alarms going off," Liv says, not looking up from the skillet she is using to cook eggs. Liv is the cook between the two of us. Everything I try to cook I burn, so I leave the cooking to Liv and I do most of the cleaning."You heard my alarms and didn't wake me up?" I say, a little annoyed as I am looking for my bag and shoes to throw on."Well I would've but I was too busy sneaking out the guy from last night," Liv replies now looking at me with a smirk on her face. Liv is your typical party girl who brings different men home every other night. I'm not one to judge but I am slightly jealous. Liv is very attractive and always has men jumping at her feet. As for me, I have never been on a date or had a boyfriend. I am hoping that college will change that. Being eighteen and never had sex before or a boyfriend is quite embarrassing especially since most people in high school had lost their virginity before we graduated and I'm sure most of the college campus has too."You're ridiculous," I say as I grab an apple for a quick breakfast."Where are you in a hurry to?""Well I missed my eight o'clock physics class, but I have a meeting with the head hockey coach this morning so that is where I'm headed.""Hmm. Good luck I'm sure you'll impress him with your abilities," Liv says as she gets her toast out of the toaster and puts it on a styrofoam plate."Thanks. I'll let you know how it goes. Afterwards I have calculus. Then I will be home until hockey practice, If I make the team""Gross. Sounds worse than the meeting. I'm sure you will make the team, you have always been a great hockey player and I'm sure the coach knows that since he wanted you to come here and play for them.""Aren't you just lucky to be an art major? Thanks, Liv. I needed a confidence boost this morning""You picked your major not me," Liv says as she makes her way to the kitchen table. I just shot her a look as I headed out the door. "And glad I could be of service."I walk out of our apartment and into the warm air. Vermont is very pretty in September as the leaves on the trees are starting to change. I told myself I would walk to my classes to get exercise and to scope out the campus more, but I don't currently have time for that. I grab my keys out of my bag and unlock my car. I drive a Honda Civic which is basic but it gets me from point A to point B. I had worked two jobs when I was sixteen to be able to buy a car for myself so even though she's basic I love her. I start my car and put the directions to the campus in my GPS. I haven't had a chance to check out the different stores and shops close to our apartment, but when I pass a coffee shop down the road I make a mental note to stop by there to grab an application. I currently don't have a job or any money and I need both of those ASAP.Our apartment being only 10 minutes from campus is a blessing on days like today where I'm running behind. I drive with the windows down for some fresh air that will hopefully help me relax. I am very nervous about this meeting. I've never been very good at telling people about myself. I have always been a shy person who never spoke unless they were spoken to. Because of this, I never really had friends in high school and spent most of my days either reading or doing homework. I was never allowed to do much because my parents wanted me to stay focused on school, so I have never been to a party before either.Coming to Vermont was nerve racking in itself as I am five hours away from my family and the people I know. I know this will be good for me though, I will be able to play hockey, hopefully meet new people, and earn a degree all at the same time. I needed change and I needed a fresh start. I told myself that coming to college was a chance to reinvent myself and experience the things I never got to in high school.I arrive on campus and try to find the faculty building. Everything on this campus looks the exact same and I don't have the time this morning to go from building to building to find where I need to go.I look at the signs and see an arrow pointing to the faculty building. I drive over and find a parking spot. I grab my phone off of the dash holder and pull up the email the coach sent me to find out which room his office is located. Room 202. I lock my phone, take a deep breath, and step out of my car. You got this, I tell myself. Even if I answer questions awkwardly and poorly I'm hoping that my hockey skills will save the meeting.I walk into the building and see a lady sitting at the front desk. She looks up and smiles at me as I approach her desk."Hello. Welcome to the faculty building. Do you have a meeting?""Yes. My name is Zora Brown and I am here to see Mr. Johnson.""Ah Zora. I have you down. Just take a seat and I'll let Mr. Johnson know you're here.""Thank you," I reply as I take a seat. I look around the building and see different flyers for different events. I see one that is for freshmen. A freshman meeting party that is for tonight at eight. I take out my phone and snap a picture of it. Maybe I'll go and it'll be a chance for me to meet some people here on campus.I know I have Liv, but Liv has been here for two years already and has found her people. She told me I could hang out with her and her art friends but I don't want to feel out of place and want to have my own friends too. I'm hoping that I will be able to meet people in my classes and hopefully befriend the girls on the hockey team."Miss Brown?" I hear a voice call. I turn around and see who I am assuming is Mr. Johnson. I don't remember him being the one I had talked to about coming to school here."Hi," I say with a smile. I grab my bag and follow him to his office."Please take a seat," He gestures to the seat across from his desk. I look around his office and notice physics charts hanging. A wave of anxiety hits me and I say a quick prayer in hopes he's not also my physics professor."Thank you," I say as I sit. I am currently sweating, bullets and more aware of my heart beat. I try to calm myself down to avoid having a panic attack in this man's office."I didn't see you in class today," Mr. Johnson starts. Shit. The hockey coach is also a physics professor? My physics professor? Can this morning get any worse? I shift in my seat a little, caught off guard, trying to think of what to say."Sorry about that. I didn't wake up to my alarms this morning," I say with an awkward chuckle. I can feel my face getting as red as a tomato. Missing classes isn't like me, neither is running late. I am usually twenty to thirty minutes early to every place I go, but of course he doesn't know that."No worries. Physics is not what you came here for. What you came here for is to discuss hockey right?""Right," I say smiling, trying to regain my composure."Great. So I'm not sure if you remember me but I am actually the one that watched your high school games last year.""Yes I remember," I lie. I honestly don't remember who I spoke to about hockey and I don't remember seeing him at any of my games, but I sure wasn't going to tell him that."Good. So we have practices everyday from five to eight at night. I hope that works with your schedule and if you have night classes we can work around those.""That works perfectly for me and I don't have any night classes.""Good. That's all I have for you. Any questions?" Mr. Johnson asks. I stare at him blankly and cock my head in confusion. That's it? That's all he wanted to tell me? I don't know much about meetings or interviews for that matter but I do know it should be longer than five minutes. I realize I am still giving him a blank stare and try to change my features, failing terribly. "Something wrong?""Um. I'm honestly a little caught off guard by the lack of questioning."Mr. Johnson just stares at me. "Zora, I've seen you play. You're a good player and a hard worker. I know you want to be on this team and I want you on this team. What else do I need to know?" I mean he does have a good point. Hockey is mostly show not tell, so I guess I see how he wouldn't have much to say.I sat there for a moment. "I suppose you have a point.""Very well then. I will see you at five tonight," Mr. Johnson says as he gets up from his chair and walks to his office door, holding it open for me. I notice that he is really tall, probably six foot, and actually looks young for a hockey coach. Maybe late twenties early thirties?"See you tonight," I reply as I walk out of his office. I spent way less time in that meeting than I had expected so I have some time to kill before my next class. I decide to go to the next building which is the campus library. I don't have any books for my classes because I didn't have any money to buy them before the semester started. I still don't have the money to buy them but at least I can look to see what books I actually need.I walk into the campus building and see a "We're hiring!" sign. Perfect. I can get a job too while I'm here. I walk to the front desk where I see a girl about my age reading a book. She hears me approach and looks up from her book."Hi there. Welcome to the campus library. How can I help you?""Hi. I was just looking to see what books I needed for my classes.""Okay, if you need anything just let me know.""Actually, I was also wondering, do you still have student positions? I saw the sign hanging up.""Yes! My name is Clare," the girl says perking up. She puts a random piece of paper in her book to hold her place and closes it. "I do the interviews. You came just in time. I need one more student for the night shift. Are you available now for an interview?"I am once again caught off guard, but am glad at the chance of getting a job. I did say I needed one ASAP and Clare is going to do just that."Yes," I say with a smile."Perfect. Come this way."I follow Clare to one of the empty study rooms. Where she offers me a seat and takes one of her own."So for this position it's really easy. You just help students find books for their classes when they come in, and answer whatever questions they may have. We also have a tutoring option if you're up for that.""Sounds good to me. Do you get paid extra for tutoring?""Yes.""Then sign me up," I say. I performed well in school, graduated top of my class and I'm a book nerd, I think I would do a pretty good job tutoring people. I mean how hard could it really be?"Perfect. So the night shift is from ten at night to two in the morning. We try to keep the library open kind of late because a lot of students like to come here to study as well. During these hours no one is really searching for books so you are more than welcome to do school work if needed. The pay is sixteen dollars an hour. How does that sound?""Sounds good to me." Sixteen dollars an hour to tutor students and show them books sounds like an easy on campus job to me. I remember the mental note I had made about the coffee shop and decide that two jobs is better than one and I need all the money I can get. I make another mental note to stop there after my classes."Great. When can you start?""As soon as you need.""I just need you to fill this out and can you start tomorrow night?""Yes," I say as I sign the application form."Good. You will have someone with you that will show you the ropes.""Okay great. See you then." I say. I am no longer feeling as stressed as I was an hour ago. I may have missed my first class, but my meeting went well and now I have a job. I smile as I walk to my calculus class, then I realize I have no idea how to get there."Hey Clare? Where is the math building?""Oh, that is the next building over to the right when you walk out of here.""Thank you," I say as I grab my bag and go out the way we came.I arrive at the math building and find room 402. I walk in and see that the room is huge and almost already filled. I look at the time and realize class starts in five minutes.I am starting to feel anxious again as I try to find an empty seat. I scan the room and see students talking and laughing. I see a seat next to probably the prettiest girl I have ever seen. Not probably, actually. She is actually the prettiest girl I have ever seen. She has long blonde hair that goes down to her waist that is as straight as a board and green eyes that make her features pop more. She is laughing at something the girl next to her just said. I stare at her a little longer before I walk to the seat next to her.I walk over, take a seat and set my bag down. She stops talking and turns to look at me."Hey," I say with a smile."Hi," she smiles back. "I'm Reya.""I'm Zora," I reply."Nice to meet you. Are you new?""Yes," I laugh nervously. I was already nervous before coming into the building but her talking to me makes me more nervous."Are you from Vermont?""No I am not. I am from Pleasantville, New York.""New York? Then what brings you to Vermont?""Hockey. I played hockey in high school and decided to play here," I say and I could've sworn that her entire demeanor changed and she became tense. It was only for a split second and then she composed herself. I am assuming that she also plays on the hockey team."Really?. Will you be at practice tonight?""Yes.""Great. I'll see you there," she smiles and this time I could tell it was fake. She turns back around to talk to her friends and I sit there replaying the interaction in my head wondering what caused the shift in her mood."Good morning everyone. My name is Mrs. Hughes. Welcome to calculus. This class is fast paced so if you start to fall behind speak up or you will fail," Mrs. Hughes says as she messes with something on her computer. I glance over at Reya who is still talking to her friends. Mrs. Hughes pulls up the first lesson and begins to teach the basics of derivatives."That's all for today. We will have a quiz tomorrow over derivatives so come prepared. If you feel lost either stay after class or shoot me an email and I will get back to you," Mrs. Hughes said when class was over. I look at the examples and know I won't need to study for this quiz because I had already learned this before. I took calculus in high school, but it didn't transfer over when I started here. I glance over at Reya who has nothing written in notebook and I wonder how she will do on tomorrow's quiz.I leave the math building and head back to my car. It's noon and I have two online classes that I can check out before hockey practice at five. I remember stopping at the coffee shop so I turn left into the parking lot on my way home."Good afternoon. What can I get you?" a girl at the counter says when I walk in."I'm actually looking for an application," I say scanning the coffee shop. It is very pretty inside. There are a lot of plants and students sitting at tables working on homework."Here you go," the girl says, handing me the form. This application is longer than the campus one so I decided to take it with me."Thank you.""Of course. Have a good day.""Thank you, you too."I walk back to my car and drive home."Hey. How was the meeting and calculus?" Liv says from the living room when I get home. I sit my keys down and walk to the couch. She is standing by the living room window working on a painting. I look at the painting and see she is drawing the Mona Lisa."The meeting went well I guess? It was probably five minutes and he didn't ask me any questions. He told me that he had seen me play and didn't need to know anything else. Afterwards I headed to the library and got a job. Then I went to calculus where I met one of the girls from the hockey team. Her name is Reya and she's a junior. She asked me where I was from and I told her, she then asked me what brought me to Vermont and I told her hockey then her whole demeanor changed. Like she seemed annoyed and tense. I'm not sure why. Also why are you painting the Mona Lisa?""Because you're a freshman and a new member to her hockey team," Liv says, not looking up from her painting. "Congrats on the job and I'm glad the meeting went well. I am painting the Mona Lisa for my art history class.""Wait, what do you mean 'because I'm a freshman'?"Liv puts her paintbrush down and looks at me. "You're the only freshman on the team. She sees you as a threat.""What?""People talk. I heard that you're the only freshman and people have heard about your record. There's already talk that you're going to be the team's star player.""What? That's crazy. How would people already know that?""Again people talk. I'm sure someone found out about you being scouted. You will find out but college isn't much different from high school. There's a lot of gossip."I think about what Liv said, confused. Why would anyone care about me? This is a big campus and I just got here."The same thing happened my freshman year when I came for basketball.""That's crazy," I say as I walk to the kitchen table and open up my laptop."I thought the same thing."I open up my Brightspace and click on my English class. I try to start on a paper that's due in two days but I can't stop thinking about what Liv said. I don't understand why people care about a random freshman from New York.