"Zora. You will be filling for Reya," Coach says looking at Zora from his clipboard. Zora looks at me and then back to Coach. You've got to be kidding me. First, I'm benched and then he has Zora take my spot for the scrimmage? This can't be happening.I met with Coach a few days ago before practice where we talked about my calculus grade, where he told me that I would need a tutor and be benched until I can get it up. I'm not as upset about it as I was when I first met with him, but I know when the game starts is when the sadness will creep in.It may not look like it based on my grades, but I have worked my ass off to get where I am today. Everything I have done college-wise has been for my hockey career. When Coach had first told me I was being benched I felt like I had been punched in the gut. When you love a sport and put your blood, sweat, and tears into it hearing those words sounds like the worst news in the world.Hockey is the only thing that I love that has loved me back. Playing hockey and getting the reward of a goal or my teammates telling me I'm doing good almost makes up for the silence of my parents. Hockey is what got me through high school when my parents were never around. It was my escape away from reality and made me feel less alone. Hockey is the one thing that has brought me happiness and never took it away.I was constantly fighting for my parents' validation and to hear an "I'm proud of you" for once, but it never happened. I participated in sports and school clubs just to play or perform and see everyone's parents in the crowd but mine. My parents have never truly cared about me or my accomplishments but at least I now have the chance to be proud of myself.And I am proud of myself, not of my grades of course, but of how far I have come in my hockey career. I am a good ass player, and I won't let anything ruin my junior season. Not even calculus."Okay, Coach," Zora replies and heads to the locker room to get ready. Our scrimmage starts at five but Coach wanted us to be here at three so he could run through plays and discuss positions for tonight.I take a seat on the bench because I have nothing else better to do."How are you holding up?" Genevieve asks as she sits down next to me.I shrug my shoulders. I'm feeling okay. I am bummed but I keep telling myself that it could be worse. I could be benched for our first game of the season or even the last, but it's just a scrimmage. The scrimmage itself isn't important but the opportunity to show my teammates that I would make a good team captain is.I'm not sure where I'm sitting due to the incident with Genevieve and Zora before practice the other day. I know it wasn't my fault, but I was still involved. Rue had told me about what happened and how everyone was pretty upset at Genevieve for outing Zora like that. I agree with my teammates. If Zora is gay that's her business and no one should be outed like that. I'm not sure where Genevieve got her information but I'm not sure if I trust it especially since Zora said she wasn't gay.I have been ignoring Marcus's texts, not because I'm mad at him but because I don't really know if I want to be involved with him anymore. We have been friends with benefits for a few years now and I feel like I'm getting bored. Marcus isn't looking for a relationship, and I'm not sure if I am either, but I know the kind of guy Marcus is and I'm tired of worrying about if he is with other girls or not.When we had first started things, we didn't decide to be only with each other and at first, I was fine with that. Until I wasn't. The more time I had spent with Marcus the less I wanted to spend time with anyone else, but he wasn't like that. He would jump at any opportunity to get a girl in his bed, which is why I wasn't super surprised to hear about Zora and him. I was mostly pissed because I'm already jealous of Zora and she had to take Marcus too?I'm not sure if I will meet up with Marcus and hear his side of things. Just like Genevieve, I don't trust Marcus either. I think he would just lie to me and tell me what I want to hear. However, a part of me is curious because there's been word that Zora didn't sleep with Marcus. She even said that to Genevieve, so I am wondering what happened there. It isn't like Marcus to turn down a girl. I don't know Zora very well, but being a freshman, I feel like she would have been excited to be with a senior football player, a captain at that. I know I wouldn't have turned that down."Reya... Hello?" Genevieve says knocking me out of my thoughts. I had forgotten that she was sitting next to me and talking to me."Sorry. I'm doing okay. How are you feeling about the scrimmage?" I reply."Nervous, but I'm glad it's just a scrimmage and not our first game.""I agree with you there," I say, and I do. If I could choose to miss the scrimmage or our first game, I would choose the scrimmage a thousand times over."Did you find a tutor?""I did. You will never guess who it is.""Liv?""Close, but no.""Zora?""Yep.""No way.""Yeah. I guess she works at the campus library, and she is the only tutor available that can work around my hours. It's unbelievable. Out of all the people on this damn campus and she is the only one who offers tutoring at the hours I need.""Shit," Genevieve says. Shit is indeed correct. That's what I said when I walked in and Zora had told me she was a tutor. "Good luck with that. When do you start?""Tonight, after the scrimmage. She told me Mondays and Wednesdays after practice works better for her, so it's what we're going with.""Hopefully she can help you so you can play in our first game.""Yeah, I hope so too."✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰"Alright. It's about time for the game. Let's play hard, win, and set a good tempo for the start of the season," Coach says in our huddle. "Anything anyone would like to add?""I know I'm new and this is my first year, but I want you to know that so far, I know we're a good team and I know we're going to–pardon my language Coach– kick ass this season. So, let's go out and get a win," Zora said. I didn't expect her to speak up and it seems by the looks of some of our teammates they were surprised too."Woo-hoo!" Marissa yelled. "Catamounts on three. One. Two. Three.""Catamounts!" We all cheered as we broke the huddle. I made my way back to the bench as my teammates got into their positions on the ice. Zora is in a position as the right defense man. My position. We had already done the national anthem and announcing of the teams. Today we are playing the University of Massachusetts. All that's left before the start of the game is the puck drop.A part of me is a little nervous that she will play my position well. Of course, I want my team to win, but I also don't want to be replaced on the ice. During practice Zora was playing center forward so I'm not sure if she has ever played the right defense man position before. Marissa is in the center forward position so she will be fighting for the puck when the referee drops it.It depends on the referee, but this one prefers 'referee's rule' where he drops the puck in between the two center players and they both fight for control once it hits the ice.Marissa lines up with the referee and the other center player. The rest of the players form a circle around them. The referee drops the puck and Marissa is fast, but UMass is faster. They gain control first and my team spreads out. Zora is back and ready to help the goalie if need be. Good. UMass attempts to slide the puck to one of their players across the ice, but Genevieve is faster and gains control of the puck. She quickly skates down the ice weaving through the different players and makes a beautiful goal into the net. I stand up and cheer.Each period is twenty minutes long and after the first period, there is a fifteen-minute intermission. My teammates skate over, and Coach begins to speak."The score is currently two to one. We are only winning by one. Everyone is doing a great job. Zora you are doing great as defense man, but just make sure you are getting back fast enough to help the goalie when the other team is coming down the ice. Some of those girls move quickly so you have to try and keep up," Coach says. Zora nods at Coach and I can't help but be amused. Not to toot my own horn but Coach never had to tell me to make sure I'm getting back fast enough.I do have to admit that Zora is doing a decent job, I won't tell her that though. She had saved a few goals, and I have to give her credit for that. Watching my teammates play without me does make me upset, but I know this is temporary and I'll be back playing with the girls I've been playing with the last two years.After two more periods, the game is over. We won four to two. Everyone heads to the locker room and Coach begins the after-game debrief."Still good for tonight?" I ask Zora as she starts to remove her hockey gear."Yeah. You can come over if you want. My roommate has a basketball game, so she won't be home for a while," Zora says as she removes her black undershirt revealing her bra. I try to stop my eyes from wandering down, but I can't help myself. She is wearing a black sports bra and somehow her breasts still look great. My eyes wander down to her stomach and I notice she has a belly button piercing. Zora has an attractive body.Stop it, Reya.I clear my throat hoping that Zora didn't notice me staring. "Works for me."Zora puts on a black hoodie and keeps her leggings on. Thank God. I know I wouldn't be able to keep myself from looking if she changed her pants too.What is going on with me?Why am I thinking like this?I have never found myself attracted to a girl before but for some reason, I'm attracted to Zora.No.No, it's not attraction, it's admiration. I admire Zora. I am not into girls."I'm ready to go when you are," Zora says."I'm ready. What's your address?" I ask as I grab my phone for her to type it into the GPS. She grabs my phone, types it in, and hands it back to me. "See you there."I pull up to Zora's apartment complex. She's able to live off campus as a freshman? I wonder how she managed to do that. When I was a freshman, we had to live on campus for the first two years, it was required. I see Zora get out of her car, so I get out of mine and grab my book bag from the back seat.We enter the building and take the stairs to the second floor. Zora pulls out her keys and unlocks the door."After you," she says, and I walk into her apartment. It looks really nice. The kitchen is the first thing you walk into with the living room straight ahead and a hallway to the right where I'm assuming the bedrooms are."Where do you want to study?" I ask."Living room is fine," Zora says as she makes her way to her fridge. "Would you like something to drink?" She pulls out a wine cooler, sits it on the counter, and looks at me."You're eighteen," I say raising my eyebrows."So. Do you want something or not?""I'll take a wine cooler." I could definitely use a drink. These past few days have been rough, for both of us I'm sure. Zora grabs the wine coolers and makes her way to the couch. She sits the drinks on the coffee table and goes into her room to grab her calculus notes. I open my wine cooler and decide to down half of it immediately. The flavor is blue raspberry."Okay," Zora says as she opens her notebook to the section we are currently learning and have a test on in two days. "We are learning about the fundamental theorem of calculus."After two hours of studying, my brain is fried, and I feel like I have a pretty good understanding of the topic. I will be studying more tomorrow and the morning before the test because if I get an A, it will bring my grade to maybe a C and that'll give me a cushion for the following tests.Zora gets up to grab us both a fourth wine cooler. I know I shouldn't be drinking because I have to drive home at some point, but I didn't care."So why are you failing calculus?" Zora asks me as she opens her drink. This one was orange and I'm not sure what the flavor was."I've never been good at math," I admit, feeling embarrassed. I take a big sip of my drink and avoid eye contact with Zora"That's okay. We all have something we're not good at."I look up at her. "What are you not good at?"Zora thinks for a moment before answering and I swear she's thinking of something to say to make me feel better."All kinds of things actually. I was sheltered growing up aside from being able to play hockey. So, I don't know how to swim or ride a bike.""What? That's crazy. You don't know how to ride a bike?" I say surprised. Most kids learn how to ride a bike when they're younger and use that as a means of travel before getting a car."No. My dad died when I was five and my mom never recovered from it. She went into a deep depression. It was like when my dad died a part of her did too. I was able to go to hockey practice only because my grandma took me when she could. Both my mom and grandma are dead now, and I've just never learned.""I'm sorry," I say. I feel awkward. I never know what to do or say when the topic of death comes up. Hearing that Zora doesn't have parents makes me want to hug mine. They're absent, but they're alive and that's more than what Zora has.Zora changed the topic, and we started talking about our majors and other classes we were taking.After about an hour of talking, I decided I should probably go home."I should get going," I say as I go to stand up. Zora stands up too."You've had six wine coolers. I don't think you should drive home. You can stay here tonight?" She offers. I hesitate. I don't really want to stay here, but she's probably right, I shouldn't drive. "You can sleep in my bed, and I can sleep on the couch.""No, no. I'm perfectly fine on the couch. I don't want to take your bed." I eye the couch. It doesn't look comfortable to sleep on. It's one of the couches that fits two people to sit, and I just know that I wouldn't be comfortable. I'm five foot seven and know I'm too tall for the couch and my legs would hang off of it. Zora is five foot three, but I would feel terrible kicking her out of her bed.Zora looks at the couch. "How about we both sleep in my bed? It's queen and now that I'm looking at the couch, you're a bit tall for it."Should I? No. Am I going to say yes anyway? Yes."Sure."Zora leads me into her room and finds pajamas for me to put on. She grabs pajamas for herself and tells me she's getting in the shower.I'm sleeping in the same bed as Zora Jones. I wonder how this will go.