"Then what is it, Gabe?" I snap, stepping back. He's not over her. He's using me to get over her. "Because all I hear are lies and excuses. You're moving on from her so easily, and I-" I choke on the words, my throat closing up. "I just don't understand. How could you do that? How could you just let go of four years like that?"
His face shifts, and for the first time, I see a glimpse of vulnerability in him, something raw and unguarded. "What do you mean Meg?" He pauses, looking for the right words. "I don't want to be with her anymore. I want to be with you."
"But why?" I ask, my voice breaking. "Why would you choose me when- years mean nothing?" I am asking him how he could have cut her from his life so easily when they were in love. When they had years before that love... they'd grown up together. That's not a love you get over easily. I understood that, so why didn't he?
Gabe looks at me, his expression full of pain and confusion. "I don't know how to explain it. I just... I never thought I'd find someone like you. Someone who makes everything feel... right. And I messed up. I hurt you, and I'm sorry. But I'm not going back to her."
I stare at him for a long moment, the weight of everything pulling at me. It's not just about him and Cassandra. It's about me, about everything I've been holding back. But I can't bring myself to say it.
"You keep saying it's over, but your actions tell a different story. If it's really over, why are you still letting her have a place in your life?" He looks like he's been slapped, like he's been hit with a tidal wave of emotions he wasn't ready for.
"It wasn't about deleting her number, Gabe. It's why you have her in your life, despite me being in it?" I frown, my heart heavy with confusion and fear, not knowing what's next. Gabe's jaw clenches, and I watch him take a deep breath but I'm past being calm myself. I need answers. I need to know why I'm still standing here, stuck in this mess with him when I should be on the bus by now.
"I don't want her in my life, Meg," he mutters, his voice low. "But it's complicated.
"And I can uncomplicate it for you."
He steps forward, trying to close the distance between us, but I take a step back. I'm not ready for him to touch me, not yet. But he doesn't stop. He's frustrated now, and I can see the tension building inside him.
"You still think about her, Gabe. You still care about her, admit it."
"No, I don't," he snaps. "I told you, it's over. She's in the past. I'm with you." I scoff, unable to hold back the bitterness in my voice. "But you haven't completely cut her off. You're still talking to her, still letting her in. And I… I'm left here, just waiting for you to make a decision."
His eyes narrow, and I know he's getting angry now. He's not used to me pushing him like this. And I'm not used to pushing him this hard either, but I'm done with the games. I'm done with pretending that everything's fine when it's not. "You know what, Meg?" he says, his voice rising. "You don't get it. I can't just forget about someone I was with for years. And I don't need you constantly reminding me of how much you think I'm still holding on to her. I'm trying to do this with you. I'm trying to make this work, but you're making it impossible."
I feel a sharp pang in my chest, a mixture of guilt and frustration. But it doesn't stop me. I can't let him walk all over me anymore. "If you really wanted this to work, Gabe, you'd stop letting her into your life. You'd choose me, fully, and stop leaving room for her. I'm not going to compete for your attention. I'm not going to wait around for you to decide if you're still in love with her or not."
Rain begins to drizzle then and Gabe's expression hardens, his jaw tightens along with it. He's not happy with what I've said, but it's the truth. It's the truth that's been festering in me for weeks now. And I can't keep quiet about it anymore. "I'm not going to compete with Cassandra, Gabe. I won't." I repeat the words, my voice quieter now, but full of determination as I step out from the portico in into the slow warm rain. "Either it's me or her." I'm shaking now, my breath coming in short bursts as I try to keep control. This isn't how I imagined us being. This isn't how I imagined him. But I can't help it. I'm tired. I'm tired of being the second choice.
His eyes darken, and he steps closer to me, his voice low and dangerous. "You think it's that simple, don't you?" He's angry now, really angry. I've rarely seen this side of him before. You keep pushing me, testing me, questioning everything I do?
"You do questionable things, Gabe," I whisper, my voice cracking with emotion. "You're the one testing me. And I'm done being your second choice." I turn away from him, but before I can take a step, he grabs my arm.
The force of it shocks me. My heart races, and I turn to face him, fear creeping into my chest. "Don't walk away from me, Meg," he growls, his grip tightening on my arm. "I'm not letting you go." His eyes are wide, frantic now, and I can feel his panic.
But I'm scared- scared of the way he's acting, the way he's holding me. This isn't the Gabe I know. This isn't the man I fell in love with or deluded myself into thinking I loved. "Gabe," I gasp, trying to pull away from him. But he doesn't let go. "I'm never letting you go," he says, his voice rough, desperate. His breath is ragged, and I can feel the tension in his whole body. "You and I… we're never over. You hear me?"
His grip shifts, and before I can react, he is dragging me back under the massive column-supported entryway, his hand behind my neck, his fingers grabbing a fistful of my hair. I freeze. The touch isn't violent, but it's possessive. His other hand snakes up to my neck, the thumb presses against my pulse point, and I feel the weight of his words sink deep into my chest.
"I am Gabe because your house rinks of another woman's presence."
"You're not leaving me," he repeats, his voice a low growl, his lower body pressing against me. I'm shaking now. I want to pull away, but I can't. His grip is firm, and I can feel the urgency in him. The panic. The desperation. I look into his eyes, searching for the man I once knew, but all I see is someone I don't recognize. A stranger. A man who's lost control. And in that moment, I know, this is no longer about Cassandra. This is about something deeper. Something darker. And I'm terrified.