As soon as we finished lunch, I was taken back to my room. Once I was chained to the bed again, my sister began to speak.
"So, did you figure out what you want to do? You used to like playing the piano, right? I could get you an electric piano in here if you'd like."
Wait a minute, does that mean she expects me to stay in this room for a long time?
"Hold on, are you planning to keep me like this tomorrow too?"
"Of course. Tomorrow, the day after, and every day after that—this is how it will be."
"That's ridiculous! I have to go to school!"
"Why? I've been asking you, haven't I? If you can give me a reason that satisfies me, I'll let you go to school right away."
"Well...because it's mandatory. Yeah, school is mandatory!"
"You're talking about compulsory education, right? That just means parents are required to provide an environment where their children can receive an education. It doesn't mean that parents are obligated to send their children to school, nor does it mean that children must attend. However, you do have the right to education, so if there's anything you want to learn, I'll get the textbooks and study materials for you. And if I have the time, I'll teach you myself."
So, I'd still be stuck in this room. It's not that I want to run away or that I want to die right now, but something about this feels fundamentally wrong. It's just not... human. And what about our parents? How can they be okay with this? They were always pushing me to get good grades.
"What about Mom and Dad? Don't they object to this?"
"Like I said yesterday, they've already come around to understanding my point of view. You don't need to worry about them."
Oh... I wish I hadn't asked. I can't help but think about it now. What was the point of everything I worked so hard for? I wasn't expecting any love from them anymore, but it still hurts. How could they agree to something like this? They must care so little about me, they don't even expect anything from me anymore. After all I've done, isn't that too cruel? No, this isn't the time to dwell on those thoughts—I need to come up with an excuse to get out of this situation. As I was thinking, my sister pulled me into a gentle embrace.
"Don't make that face, Kaya. You don't need to let those people upset you. They don't love you."
While she held me, she stroked my head. The warmth of her touch lit up a corner of my heart, making it impossible to keep my emotions in check.
I knew, even without being told, that they didn't love me. I'd known it all along. But knowing it in your head and feeling it in your heart are two different things. I didn't realize how much that affected me until I kept dying and starting over again. Hearing someone else say it just made me more aware of it. I thought I'd given up on this, that I'd moved on, but here I am, struggling to hold back the tears. It took me a while to calm down.
"I'm fine now, you can let go."
"...Alright. So, back to your reason for wanting to go to school. Do you have anything else?"
Oh yeah, we were talking about that. I need to find a reason that will convince her, or I'll be stuck like this forever. Oh! I've got it.
"I want to see my friends. I want to hang out and talk with them. There's no need to rush home anymore, so I want to go out for snacks or go out on weekends."
I looked up at her, pleading with my eyes. After a moment of silence, my sister responded.
"You don't need friends. What more could you want when I'm here with you? If that's your only reason, then this conversation is over. I'll take you outside if you're with me, so that's enough, isn't it?"
"No, wait! I need friends! And besides, there are other reasons! Uh, let me think—"
"If you can't think of anything right away, it's not that important. Why are you resisting this? Why... You know what, never mind. So, have you decided what you want to do?"
Why am I resisting? Isn't it obvious? This is a normal human response. But why do I feel this way? ...Maybe I should think about this later. Anyway, it seems she hasn't changed her mind. In this situation, it's unlikely she'll change her mind at all. For now, I guess I'll have to accept it.