Holden leaned forward and gripped the countertop."I'm sorry. You did what?"
"Look, Holden, I..."
"You fucked my sister! She is off-limits. I let Bodhi near her, and look how that turned out!"
"Holden, let me explain."
"I don't want an explanation! I told you at the hospital the day the boys were born that you were to stay away from her. Jesus Christ! At least Lewis has Ashley. I don't need to worry about him!"
"Boo Bear, you need to calm down." Joanna rubbed his back.
"Jo, he slept with my sister! My best fucking friend. Who does that?"
She looked at him disapprovingly and crossed her arms over her chest. "You jackass!"
"What do you mean me? I'm not the jackass!"
"Holden, how did we meet?" She popped her left hip and pursed her lips.
"Through Perri. Why?"
"Am I best friends with Perri?"
"Yes, but—"
She held up her hand to stop him. "And did we sleep together?"
"That's different."
"Why?"
"Because Perri is my sister."
"And you're her brother. Who fucked her best friend.""
"But she's my—"
"Holden, we know she's your sister."
"Look what Bodhi did to you. His actions almost killed her... twice!"
"I know what this really is about."
"Really? Enlighten me with your wisdom, Willet."
"Seriously? Are we going to have this argument again?"
"What? I can't be upset that you didn't take my last name."
"Oh, for the love of Christ! We are not going over this again! Why do I have explain this to you numerous times how archaic I think it is, and I choose to keep my name—which, incidentally, was given to me by my father under the same idea as taking the name of your spouse!"
"That's really interesting. I would—"
"Stay out of this, Jake!" They said together.
He held up his hands in surrender.
"What happens when we have a baby? Can the kid at least have my last name?"
"Of course. It will, however, be hyphenated with mine!"
"Oh, come on, Joanna. Can you not be a feminist for one conversation?"
Jake's eyes got wide. Oh, Holden. You're about to die. I guess I don't need his blessing anymore to date your sister.
"Ooh, really. That's how you feel? Well, you used to adore my strong-willed, take no shit, grab life by the tits attitude. Now, I'm a cranky, loudmouth feminist!"
"I didn't say that!"
Jake was watching the conversation like a tennis match.
"Do you know the perk of not changing my name?"
"What would that be?
Less fucking paperwork when I divorce you!"
Holden looked devastated. His voice got quiet. "Do you want a divorce?"
She came up to her husband and cupped his face. He looked like he was going to cry.
"No, Boo Bear. I don't want a divorce. What I want is for you to understand that Persephone is her own person. She's not just your little sister. You don't own her. Bodhi fucked up. Really bad—"
"Twice," Jake interjected.
She shot him a look.
"Sorry."
"It's not your fault he did. You feel the overwhelming urge to protect her because you gave him your seal of approval to Bodhi, and he hurt her..." she looked at Jake. "Twice. Jake is not Bodhi. You can't penalize him for something Bodhi did. With or without your approval, if he wants to pursue a relationship with Perri, you have to let him."
"Yeah, but—"
"Holden, I am not going to hurt her."
"I just know your past, Jake." The revolving door of women. You're a player.
"Persephone already beat me. Game over. I think I love her, man."
"Oh," Joanna said, looking caught off guard. "Does she know this?"
"I may have said something to that effect."
"Before or after you fucked her."
"Can you please not use that word? I didn't fuck her, or bang her, or have casual sex with her. She can call it whatever she wants, but to me, I made love to her."
"Hello? Jo? Holden? Jacob?" Perri's voice carried through the house.
"We're in here," Joanna called out.
Perri walked into the kitchen. Holden looked like a zit about to pop, Jo was so red she looked sunburnt and Jake looked extremely awkward.
"You told him? Are you insane? I am surprised to see you alive."
"I was just telling them--"
"We wanted to tell them together."
"I got as far as--"
"Jake promised that he would be there for me, and he swears I will never be a single mother again."
"Oh, fuck. I didn't get to that part yet," Jake whispered out of the corner of his mouth.
"Fuck. Look, Holden, before you go all batshit crazy, please remember I'm pregnant."
"JAKE THORSELL, YOU MOTHER FUCKER! YOU KNOCKED UP MY FUCKING SISTER. OH, YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!"
"Holden, please do not kill my baby daddy."
"You aren't helping, Persephone."
Holden charged Jake and speared him up against the wall, knocking the wind out of him.
"Holden, stop!" Perri grabbed him by the bicep. "Don't hurt him!"
Jake was bent over, struggling to suck air into his lungs.
"Why don't we just talk about this like human beings?" Jake gasped.
"Why are my friends constantly knocking up my sister?"
"Holden, don't be crude. Clearly, they love each other, and they want this baby, so it will be easier if we, and by we, I mean you, get over it and let them be happy."
"But--"
"Holden, I'm done talking. Are you?"
He looked between the two of them. "Don't you fucking hurt her." He pointed at Jake.
"Never. I delivered one of her babies, and now I get to have my own baby with her. I can't tell you how much I love her."
"Fine. I'll tolerate what is going on, but I am not going to accept it."
"Congratulations, you guys. You are going to have the cutest little person!" Joanna took both of them in her arms and hugged them tightly.