A few years later.
"MOM!" two little voices said.
She felt them climb up on the bed. They both began jumping. Her body started to bounce. "Guys, please. Please stop. It's way too early for this."
"We want pancakes!"
"With chocolate chips!"
"Yeah! Chocolate chip!
"And gummy bears!"
"That is not happening, kiddo!" she told the little boy.
"Dude, too far. You should have stopped the negotiations when you were on top."
"My bad."
She smiled and let out a little laugh."You guys are too smart for your own good." She pressed herself up and sat on the edge of the bed. "Let Mom get up and hit the head."
"Then pancakes?"
"Yes, Patrick. Then pancakes."
The two little boys slid off of the bed. "YAY!" they said together.
They took off out of the bedroom.
"Don't run, boys! If one of you gets hurt, I don't want to hear about it! There's frozen peas in the freezer and band-aids in the closet."
"Wow, Mama! Parenting goals." Patrick yelled back down the hall.
"Damn right, Mom of the year right here!" she yelled back.
She went into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. "You look tired. You look old. You look single."
She splashed water on her face, brushed her teeth, and pulled her hair back into a tight ponytail. "Wa-la! Instant facelift." She smiled. "I'm going to have the world's worst headache."
She made her way through the house into the large kitchen. She had it set up with commercial-style appliances for her catering business. It was an open floor plan. The kitchen flowed into a large family room with a fireplace and a dining area. She had bought the house after her parents divorced. After they sold the family home, they gave each child twenty thousand dollars to put down on a house. Annie pocketed hers. Holden and Persephone bought one on the same street ten houses apart.
"You know what, guys? Mommy needs to teach you two how to make coffee." She yawned, her slippers dragging across the floor.
"You can teach me," Patrick said. "Would make your coffee every morning."
"Thank you, Patrick."
"You can teach me too, Mom! You can pay me in pancakes," while he bounced his brows.
" Bodhi! You would make your Mommy pay you for making her coffee?"
"Time is money, Mom," he said, bouncing a basketball.
"Where on earth did you hear that?" she asked, laughing.
"Uncle Holden says it all the time."
"Do you really need to do that in here? We have a huge basement with cement floors."
"If I go downstairs, I can't look at your beautiful face," Bodhi smiled.
"You remind me so much of your d... Uncle."
"I'm much better looking," he said.
Perri let out a laugh. Her boys were the light of her life. Bodhi was so much like his father, and Patrick was like her. They had brown hair and eyes that looked like the crystal clear waters in the Bahamas. They were little copies of their father.
She heard the door from the garage open and close.
"Start the party. I'm here!" Holden called out.
"Well, speak of the devil!"
"Uncle Holden is the devil!" Patrick said with wide eyes.
"No. Uncle Holden is the GOAT!" He picked up the boys, one in each arm, and threw them over his shoulders. He spun them around in circles, and they squealed in delight.
"Holden Pollux, if those boys puke, you are cleaning it up." She started taking the ingredients out to make the pancakes.
He put the boys down. They looked like drunk sailors for a couple of seconds. "Perri, what are you wearing??
She looked down and wrinkled her nose. "Umm. A nightshirt. Like I do every night."
He leaned against the counter, threw a chocolate chip in the air, and caught it in his mouth. "No, a shirt is comfortable and made of cotton. You are wearing an uncomfortable jersey made of nylon."
"It was the first thing I grabbed," she smoothed out the Newcastle Eagles jersey.
"It was still readily available and within grabbing distance?"
"Maybe I had to look under a couple of shirts." She played with the frayed hem. She lowered her voice. "I don't know why, but I started to miss him lately. I know I said I was over him, but I see him every time I look at my children. I love them because they are my boys, and I love them even more because they look like their dad. The older they get, the more their faces grow into him."
"You know you could do something crazy like trying to contact him. I bet he still has the same cell number," Holden said, spinning an egg.
"I doubt it. He's a professional ball player. He doesn't need everyone he's ever given his number to trying to call him in the past."
"You never know. Maybe he has two phones, one for his past and one for his present. What if he didn't change it just in case you called?"
"Oh, please. It's been over five years. I can't. It's too late. He's going not to want to speak with me anyway when he finds out I kept him away from the boys."
She looked at the two boys playing swords with two empty wrapping paper tubes.
"What have I done, Brother Bear?"
"Whatever it is, it can't be undone. So, all you can do is move forward. And I think you need to include him in that."
"He's going to be so hurt and mad at me," Perri said.
"You don't know that."
"How would you feel if Joanna did that to you?"
"Yeah. You're probably right. Hurt, mad, pissed, fucking angry---"
She cut him off. "You can stop at any time, Holden."
He tossed two more chips in the air and caught them in his mouth.
"Wow, how do you do that, Uncle Holden?" Patrick said.
"I told you, I am the greatest of all time! I can do lots of cool stuff."
"Can you teach us, please!" the boys begged together.
"No. He won't. Not here. I don't need an entire bag of chocolate chips scattered on the floor. Let Aunt Jo-Jo deal with that."
"Buzzkill," Patrick said, disappointed."
"These kids are so snarky already! Do you home-school them in snark? Is that a mandatory class?"
"Well, between me and Auntie Jo-Jo---"
"Nevermind. No more questions, your Honor," He said with a smile. "Ah. Perri." He pointed to the family room.
Bodhi was trying to do a handstand up against the wall.
"Bodhi O'Neill James! Where do I not want to go today?" she asked the little boy, sighing.
He stood up straight and looked at his shoes.
"Answers, not your shoes Bodhizafa." She smiled.
"The emergency room."
"Why don't we go out for breakfast?" Holden asked.
"Because I can make breakfast here," she said. "Can you get that bowl down for me?"
"No."
"No? What do you mean, no?"
"Go get dressed. I'll get the boys dressed," he said.
"Fine. But I am doing this under great protest."
"Your comment has been noted and logged," he said sarcastically.
"Where are we going ?" Persephone asked, putting the eggs and milk back in the fridge.
"The Den on Vine. One of my clients owns it. He came into the office yesterday and mentioned it to me. He told me to come in today, have breakfast, and bring the family. Since you are my family, you're coming with me."
"Is it kid-friendly?" she asked.
"Not sure. Get dressed."
"Do I have time to at least shower?"
"Ugh. Fine. But don't wash your hair when you do that you take too damn long. Which I do like the blonde. Glad you went back to it," he said, pulling on her ponytail.
"Hey! Cut it out! I'm going. Lord have mercy! Get the boys dressed and put on ESPN."
"Nice! I think Sports Center is on," Patrick said, looking at the clock on the oven."
"I just can't with you two!" Holden said.
"I want to play basketball when I go to school," Bodhi said.
"Basketball sucks. I want to play baseball like Uncle Holden," Patrick said, sticking out his tongue.
"I knew you were my favorite, Patrick."
"Wow. Scathing, Uncle Holden."
"Scathing? Do you even know what that means?"
"Mommy says it. I think it means ouch."
"You boys are too smart for your own good."
"Mom says that to us all the time."
"She's not wrong," Bodhi said. "Can we watch Sports Center, please?"
"No. You two need to get dressed."
"Fine," Bodhi said, crossing his arms.
"Let's go. First clothes, then Sports Center," Holden said, walking the boys to their rooms.
She got out of the shower and looked at herself in the mirror. "Not bad for someone who popped out twins." She traced the scar on her stomach. "I'm a terrible person." She turned around. "I still have a great ass. I think I'll call the girls and see if they want to go out. Now I need Uncle Holden to babysit."
She opened her closet. "HEY HOLDEN!"
"WHAT?"
"IS IT NICE OUTSIDE?"
"IT'S A LITTLE CHILLY. MAYBE GRAB A SWEATSHIRT OR SOMETHING."
"THEN PUT THE BOYS IN SWEATSHIRTS TOO!"
She flipped through her clothes halfway down the rod, and she froze. She pulled out her favorite sweatshirt, the one that Bodhi had given her. She hadn't seen him in years. Sometimes, it feels like a lifetime ago, and sometimes, it feels like yesterday. The last time she saw him was when she came home from New Horizons.
She had heard that he had been signed mid-season to the Black Bears. He played in England for two and a half years before the NBA knocked. She did her damnedest to avoid any news that had to do with him. Holden had talked to him several times since he came back to Tennessee. He told her that Bodhi had been married to Janessa and then divorced a little more than a year into the marriage. She wondered who cheated first. Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Perri hadn't had a serious relationship in what felt like forever. She had dated Jake for a year, but he moved to North Carolina for a job.
They had an awful argument about her just picking up and moving but she couldn't do it. He yelled something about breaking a promise and he was gone within four days. We talk every now and then. Birthday texts hate Valentine's Day texts, and sometimes he sends things that I know have undertones.
They did remain close. The boys loved Jake. He was there through the terrible twos. Even though the boys were terrific kids, they were happy babies and good toddlers.
Now, they are fast approaching six, and they are a handful. But in a good way. If it hadn't been for Holden and Joanna, she's unsure how she would have made it through. Every year on their birthdays, Holden and Joanna would give their speech about how it was time for her to tell Bodhi about the boys. And every year, she would say she'd think about it.
Bodhi still had no idea about the boys. She wanted to tell him, but she put it off for so long it got to the point where she felt he was better off. He didn't need two hyper little toddlers running at his feet while he was building his career. She also in no way would let Janessa within four thousand miles of her boys. She knew it wasn't right, but she didn't need or want anything from him.
She liked her life. She had her company and was looking into opening a restaurant within the year. She had two of the cutest not to mention smartest little boys on the planet. What else could she ask for? What she really wanted was Bodhi back. She was too afraid, and she had been for the last several years. She couldn't take the pain of losing him again. When she found out he married Janessa, it took everything she could to keep going, eating, and staying sane. If it wasn't for those little boys rolling and kicking in her belly, she wouldn't have made it.
She pulled out the sweatshirt and put it on. It was still warm and soft, but it was worn from washing it so much. The first year after she and Bodhi broke up, she wore it almost every day—as long as it fit, that is. She got big with those boys, and a lot of tears fell on that sweatshirt. She put on her favorite black jeans and her shoes.
Holden's phone rang. "Yeah."
"Is she coming?" Jake asked.
"Yeah. It took some nagging, but she's coming."
"Are you sure this is a good idea?"
"No. In all honesty, I think it's a horrible idea," Holden said.
"Then why are we doing this?"
"Because Bodhi and Patrick are almost six, they deserve to know their dad. I am the closest thing they have to a dad, yet their real dad lives twenty-five miles down the road. He's been back for a long while now. I still can't believe they have yet encountered each other at Trader Joe's."
"More importantly, I know the truth. I understand why he did what he did. One day, when he's ready, you will know, too."
"I'll pay closer attention when I see him. I haven't talked to him in forever. He didn't talk to me or Lewis when he married the succubus. I took it a little personally. Do you talk to him regularly?" Jake asked.
"Ever since he got divorced from the succubus. So, what did you tell Bodhi?"
"I told him to meet us for breakfast. Told him you and Lewis were in town, and we wanted to get the Musketeers back together," Holden said. "Have some fun."
"Does she know I'm in town?" He sounded hopeful.
"No. You can be a pleasant surprise. Or an extreme let down" He laughed.
"I miss her, you know. I didn't want to call things off, but I understand why we went our separate ways. I miss those boys. I would have loved to apply for the position of dad." He cleared his throat. He was getting a little too emotional. "Is she still hot?"
"She's still my sister. "
"Gotcha. So, is that a yes?"
"Jake, just be there on time.
Alright. Don't get your panties in a twist. But seriously. Is she still hot?"
"Goodbye, Jake. I'm hanging up now." Holden said, annoyed.
"Can I get her panties in a twist?"
"Goodbye, Jacob." Holden sighed.
"Hey! One more thing!"
"As long as it does not involve Perri or her panties!" Holden said sternly.
"Are my little dudes coming? I haven't seen them in so long."
"Yes. They will be there. Wait till you see them. I think she's putting Miracle Grow in their pancakes. They take after Uncle Holden and definitely their daddy."
"They look exactly like him."
"You should see their hair," Holden said.
"Why. What's wrong with their hair?"
"It's cut exactly like Bodhi's used to wear it. Shaved on the sides and log on the top pulled into a ponytail."
"You're fucking kidding me?"
"They are cute as hell," Holden said.
"Yeah. But that's not healthy."
"She still loves him, Jake. I came in, and she was wearing his Eagles jersey. You never get over your first love."
"So I guess I don't have another shot. Have you got over yours?"
"No. I married her."
"That was the world's most sappiest answer. Is Jo sitting next to you?" Jake asked.
Holden laughed. "No. But feel free to tell her what I said when you see her. Now, bye, Jake!"
He hung up the phone before he could say anything else. That was a perfect line. I'll have to work that into a conversation sometime.
"Bodhi and Patrick, come pick out a sweatshirt! Persephone, I'm sure you look fine. We gotta get moving."
"I want my Black Bears sweatshirt because basketball rules!" Bodhi exclaimed.
"Well, I want my Smokies sweatshirt because baseball rules!" Patrick shouted back.
Holden grabbed the Sweatshirts from their closets. He tossed them to the boys.
"Basketball!"
"Baseball!"
"Black Bears!"
"Smokies!"
"Guys, just put on the damn sweatshirts," Holden said, running his hands down his face.
"Yeah, Patrick put the damn sweatshirt on!"
"Bodhi O'Neil James. Nope. That is a tall person's word! You must be this tall to say it!" She held her hand above her head.
"You do realize that these boys will be that tall by the time they hit eight," Holden said.
"Please don't. Just don't. I am not ready to lose my babies."
"I'm just saying. They are the size of an eight-year-old."
"No, they are not!" Perri said, looking at the boys sitting cross-legged watching Sports Center.
"Come on, Perri. They may be taller than all of us by the time they finish puberty. Aren't you glad you upped your calorie count? You had some big, healthy babies. They have genetics on their side, including me, Dad, McClain, and Bodhi. We are Titans among men."
"Oh, for the love of God. I think my feet are still swollen," she said, rolling her eyes.
Bodhi came running up to Holden. "You rang fine, sir?"
"I wasn't talking about you."
"Exactly how many Bodhis do you know, Uncle Holden?"
"Seriously, Perri, why do your kids talk like they're eighteen?"
"They watched a lot of little Einsteins," she said with a smile.
"And apparently Sports Center."
"They love sports. I guess it's also in their genetics. Now hurry, and you two find your shoes." She nudged him, making him stumble, but he took it a little over the top. It looked like when a sports player overdoes it.
"How did that look? I'm practicing for when we play again!"
"It looked great. Your cheating is really coming along nicely. Now, get your shoes on, or we will not go at all. I'm dead to rights serious about that."
Holden knew she wasn't bluffing. She is looking for any excuse not to go. "Listen to your mother no questions asked. NOW."
Bodhi ran off down the hall.
Holden turned to Perri. "Just relax. Wait till you taste the food. A-fucking-mazing."
"Ok. I'm going. Let me turn off the TV."
"Serious question," Holden said.
"What?"
"Have the boys ever seen him on Sports Center? Or Fox Sports? NBA Network?"
"I know they have," she said matter of fact.
"Really?"
"Bodhi went out of his mind when he found out a Basketball player on The Black Bears had the exact same name. He wanted to know everything about him. I managed to forget about it. Or I thought. Luckily, the kid is young. Not sure when he will figure it out, but he will."
"Good God, Persephone you---" He was cut off mid-sentence.
"Hey, Mama. Guess what!"
"What, Patrick?"
"The GOAT was on the phone with Uncle Jake."
"Can we go now?" Holden said.
"Why were you on the phone with Uncle Jake?"
"Uh. He was asking what kind of athlete's foot spray to use."
"Ah, huh. You always have been an awful liar. Amazing secret keeper, but you can't bluff worth shit."
Holden smiled wide. "I am taking that as a compliment
She clapped her hands to get the boy's attention. "Alright, boys, saddle up. Move it. Move it. Move it."
The two little guys ran out to the garage.
"You're a good mom, Perri. You have done an excellent job raising these two on your own."
"I'm an exhausted mom. And I had the best help a sister can ask for. Oh, by the way. Is the wife busy tonight?"
"I don't think so," he said.
"Can you watch the boys?"
"Why?"
"Girls night. I need to get drunk, and I need to get laid. Not necessarily in that order."
You might want to see how your day pans out. You may be pissed off at all of us. Including the girls. Definitely at me."Sure. I'm sure Jo would love to get out of the house."
"Awesome, thank you so much!" She kissed him on the cheek.
May want to hold off on the thank you, sis.
Chapter: Forgiveness, not permission, has been updated and extended. Please give it a read.
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