I'm sorry, I guess I just naturally jumped right in. And there's no backstory so we're going to backtrack a little bit here.
On January 17th, of 2023, is when I took a job and had my first day as an assistant manager at Little Caesars Pizza. On my first day, I walked into a crap storm. One of the cooks was getting into it with the shift lead. I tried to separate them and figure out what was going on, to try to de-escalate the situation. After having a conversation with the cook and seeing that he walked in on the shift lead ing and belittling a younger 17 year old employee, I then told him to take a walk and talk to the shift lead to see what was going on and also told him to calm down and stop yelling at me since I had nothing to do with whatever situations were going on. It took for the store manager to step in and inform the shift lead that I was the boss of him and that if I told him, he needs to calm down and be more respectful. Then that's what he needs to do and if he couldn't do that, me sending him home was an option that I could exercise.
When the shift lead decided to continue I then asked others what was going on and apparently that had been his third hostile interaction in less than 2 hours with three different employees. So I went on ahead and sent him home. I then walked out to the cook that I had sent out to take a breath and had a conversation with him. Some other employees walked out and we're on the clock so we were all just chatting and that's when the transgender woman was addressing us in somewhat asexual manner. I was very confused and she walked away and then I asked the store manager and him and the cook both were like we have no idea. They then stated a set of words I refuse to use and I told them that that is degrading and disrespectful we kind of laughed it off and then went back inside.
If you haven't guessed by now the cook became my future husband. That was the first day that I met him we then flirted for a few days before I finally exited that job after being sexually harassed by the store manager. I reported the manager to the police and then to the other assistant manager who was also the transgender woman. She then made the choice to tell everyone that I was making a scene over nothing in that I had told everybody about this even though nobody knew anything about this and then asked my future husband / the cook to watch me and see what I do next. He reported back to her a few times via text message on what I was doing when she wasn't around without knowing the story of what went on.
Our first date was a brunch at IHOP in which I picked him up from the sober living facility that he was in that was ran by the super Conservative Christian woman who literally is everything wrong with religion. The date went well. We had a few hiccups, like he was a little under the weather so he blew his nose at the table with other people beside us on both sides eating. I had to ask him to excuse himself from the table and you go to the restroom to do that he was so confused as to why nor did he care about the people around him that were grossed out by it as well. We ate and chatted for easily 2 hours and then went back to my house and which we watched a movie and just hung out. I later dropped him off at work for the day and that's I guess how it begun.
The next couple weeks were a lot of back and forth. He would call me at the time of his ability to leave the facility which was 4:00 a.m. I would pick him up and he wouldn't return back until after curfew which they were supposed to be in at 8:00 p.m. unless they were working. And after a few weeks of that he couldn't take the facility anymore and kept getting in trouble for being late for curfew so the lady put him out and told him to he couldn't return until he had paid the back due rent he owed.
She finally caved 3 days later and let him pick up the remaining of his things without paying her the back due rent he owed. And he moved in with me. One morning he around the first week of February he told me that he was headed to the gym which was a block away and he would be back in about an hour. Apparently, from my understanding, he went to the gym to shoot up and then contacted the transgender woman from Little Caesars. Then he went to her house in which he continued to do more meth. He then allowed her to have sex with him as payment for the meth. And according to him, once he had started coming down from the drugs he quickly left when he realized what he had done.
After a 17 hour binge, he contacted me and let me know that he was all right and went back to work which was where he was at and that his cell phone wasn't charged because he didn't have a charger. He made a nonchalant joke, saying that he got f***** and I thought it was that, just a joke. So I drove up to Little Caesars so that we could talk and that's when he let me know that he had cheated and that he was sorry and it wasn't normally like him but he was so high that he didn't realize what was going on. Later for me to find out that that was all a lie!
I was in tears and cried and he jumped out of the vehicle, upset that he had hurt my feelings and that he was spelled like the biggest piece of s***. And stupidly, I chased after him and we worked things out but both promised to never go into Little Caesars ever again and that he would never have contact with the transgender woman ever again.
With his last paycheck, he wanted to make things up to me and was so sorry and apologetic that, for Valentine's Day, he tattooed my name and date of birth on his pec above his nipples. In hindsight I now see that that was him love bombing me but at the time it was sweet and he seemed genuine. Later that same week I had received my taxes and he wanted to get some clothes to get a job, doing construction framing because that's what he liked to do. So we drove out to his parents, to see what tools he had left there and what clothes he had left there, before going shopping and me dropping $1700 in clothes for him.
Things seem to be looking up and we were then able to get on Craigslist and Facebook marketplace and find him a construction framing job in which he started that next week making $22 an hour which was an upgrade from the 12 or $14 an hour he was making at Little Caesars. But the unfortunate part of that was Monday through Friday 7:00 a.m. in the morning, I had to get up and take him to work everyday because he had no transportation. And then I had to return at 4:00 p.m. to pick him up from work and this one on for two and a half months before he went into a depression. It threw me off that he was depressed but he had paid me back half of what I had spent on him to help him upgrade his lifestyle and things seem to be going good. He had asked me to marry him in which I said yes although we had only been together maybe 3 months.
I wasn't somebody that was big on weddings being extravagant or fancy or even expensive. I wanted something very small and intimate with only the people that would love and support our marriage. After sending it out the announcement his mother took it upon herself to start inviting people that I had never even met and that my husband hadn't even talked to in years. So, after me wanting to cancel my own wedding because it wasn't going out I wanted it I decided to invite both sets of parents to a dinner and canceled the wedding. When in actuality we just did a small intimate ceremony with four people outside of our household and then met his parents for dinner because my parents didn't leave in time to make it so they canceled.
The level of tears his mother had when she found out and realized that we were all dressed from coming from my wedding to her son were extensive. My husband supported my decision 110% because he felt like this was our day and if we weren't satisfied with the guest list then we shouldn't have people there that we didn't want there. As hard as his mother was she understood what part she had to play in it but never actually apologized for trying to invite strangers to my wedding.
And during the wedding photos, we didn't realize at the time that I was already almost 2 months pregnant and with our daughter. So, when we later sent out announcements that we were pregnant and expecting in November of 2023 everyone was thrilled and sent baby stuff as well as wedding gifts. Well everybody but my own mother. A month later we then found out that the pregnancy wasn't viable and my body did not understand that and would not reject it so the doctors forced me to have a D&C. His mother then chose to tell everyone that we had a mandatory abortion against our wishes. That was during mother's Day and my birthday weekend that we found out in the following week we proceeded with the procedure. My husband then got in a fight with my oldest son in which they ended up scrapping it out but eventually they found a common ground and I was able to play mediator to get them level.
I was on a downhill spiral emotionally after that because as a woman that has had three children to term with no issues. I just felt like my body had forsaken me and that the one thing I should have been able to do my body decided it couldn't handle. The first three weeks my husband was gentle and try to be caring although he could tell I was struggling. But eventually he then emotionally disconnected himself and began his own spiral. Later in July, his father offered us a truck that we can make payments on so that he could drive to and from work and that I wasn't responsible anymore to get him to and from work. He had the truck all of 18 hours before he disappeared in the middle of the night saying he was going to get some air and didn't come back for almost 3 days.
Those were the most stressful three days of my life. I reported my husband missing and what he was wearing and what vehicle he was driving at the time. My level of worry was so high but apparently this was going to be something that became a regular part of our life. His mom finally contacted me and let me know that he had showed up there and was definitely relapsed. Finally the next day he had the ability to contact me after finding out how upset I was that I was being delivered a message from my own husband from his mom. Once he contacted me he said he was out getting more drugs but he missed me and wanted me to come help him to get clean. So I met him at his parents house and while he was packing up his stuff to return home he then stuck another needle in his arm while in the bathroom saying that he was flushing the stuff. He started turning purple and blue and began collapsing as I removed the needle from his arm and drug him to the shower hollering for his parents to bring me the spray. I then put my own husband under cold shower instead there with him and held him as he started getting color back in him. His mom just stood back in shocked watching the scene play in front of her of her son almost overdosing.
We then returned home after a confrontation with his father in which I addressed that they needed to stop enabling his behavior. His father lashed out at me claiming they don't enable him. My husband was very upset that his father would even yell at me and be so disrespectful so he wanted to quickly grab his things and leave. His father did later try to apologize but it was a half apology half sarcastic afterthought I suppose. And we went home and the come down was bad to say the least he was paranoid and erratic and suicidal. We had to watch him at all times he did go into the bathroom and cut himself a few times. The police showed up to see if he was still missing and just to make sure he was all right but he refused to speak with them as they showed concern for me and my sons while being with the current state that my husband was in.
And then let me know that if at any time I felt like it's in his best interest or ours to do a medical hold on him and sent him in a mental health facility that as his wife, I was legally able to do that. Unfortunately, I did not do that. He eventually slept off all the drugs and kind of went back to being himself. He was on the actual best behavior ever was super helpful as a husband and loving as a stepfather and things seem to be getting better. He had gotten all drugs and off the Suboxone out of his system so he was healthier and more energetic than ever. But keep in mind through all of this I was still mourning the loss of our daughter from 2 months before so I may have been a lot more on the b***** train than normal.
He then got another job at a different Construction company in which he stayed at for two and a half months before he started being late for work, not going to work at all and then finally he just quit. He proceeded to Dash with me for a week or so before he just found another position at another construction company with the most amazing boss. A week later was Halloween so my husband made this amazing candy box display thing for me to put outside of our apartment for all the kids in the neighborhood to take what they wanted. And we spent our Halloween watching movies and eating her favorite foods. Then we went ahead and started planning our son's 5th birthday. In which we had a main event with my friends and his parents as well as my parents all in attendance. there ended up being an altercation between my stepfather and my middle son in which that ended the relationship between my mother and stepfather and all of us because he should have never assaulted a minor.
The next week was my husband's birthday and which we just did this favorite things of ordering Chinese and he picked out his cake and we just hung out watch TV and movies and relaxed. The next week was then Thanksgiving in which I cooked. And that is when we finally realize that I was pregnant.
The following month was a bit of a blur of doctor's appointments and fights and struggles. Eventually emotions have boiled over to the point that my husband packed his stuff before he went to work on a Friday morning the second week of December and he left. We had a doctor's appointment later that afternoon out of concern of how far along was I as well as my symptoms of sicknesses. During this sonogram appointment he was in tears as he watched our baby wave at us and we got to see her for the first time. He then dropped me off at home and took our only vehicle to his parents house stopping to grab drugs, Chinese food and cigarettes on the way. He then also cheated on me that night but lied to me and claimed that she only gave him head but because he had so much drugs in his system he couldn't stay hard. Obviously that was a lie too.
We met up four days later in which he swore he wanted to sober up and get clean but he didn't want to be at the house with our kids so we went to hotel. We spent the night there. We had sex as soon as we got into the room and then proceeded to get dressed and go downstairs to smoke because he was a cigarette smoker. We had several long talks and ended up in the Jacuzzi bath time in her room and what she had sex some more. Maybe some of it was the hormones or maybe it was cuz I hadn't seen my husband and really a week and a half but we were both present. I had to tread lightly on the topic points but still having conversations that were meaningful. He was coming down so heavily that he had to keep taking hot showers to stay warm and couldn't stop fidgeting and being paranoid. We ordered Buffalo Wild wings and ate a little bit but we're able to really finish all the food. Every time I fell asleep he couldn't stop fidgeting and moving and kept waking me up and by 7:00 a.m. he was wearing to go cuz he needed drugs or something to take the edge off and I was not moving fast enough for him nor did I want to. This was my first night away from my kids in over a year and a half and I wanted to relax and enjoy that. We ended up in a fight in which he supported me that he didn't cheat on me and that he's just struggling and trying to figure himself out. But that was all lies too. He then tried to rob me out of desperation but realized how stupid that would be so he called his mom who of course enabled him some more and sent him $100.
And I guess that's about where we picked up from the beginning.