Las Vegas. Nevada.
I was surprised when the host called my name. Spotlights land on my tan skin, it illuminates my team surrounding me. The whole room applauds, their claps echo through the massive hall. I stand up, revealing my cheetah print one-piece that clung to my body, and strut toward the stage. My platform heels clack up the stairs. To the crowd, I flash my dazzling grill with a grin.
On stage, I stood next to Bella Cross, a veteran adult performer. "Congratulations, Mars." Her pointed ears poke through her flat, blazing red hair. She smiles brightly, speaking over the applause, "You deserve this." Bella kisses my cheek and hands me the award. A naked, silver man that has a slender body and long hair, it eerily looks similar to me. On the base is engraved, 'Male Performer Of The Year'.
At the podium, I grin again and wave around the trophy. As the cheers die down, a man gets up from his seat in the back. I can't see his face from the distance and lights shining in my eyes, but I could feel his presence. We stare at each other for a brief moment before he leaves.
"Thank you!" I catch onto the silence and put a smile back on my face. "This means a lot to me. I wouldn't imagine I would win an award for what I do naturally." I look at the small silver man. "I started this journey when I was nineteen. During the years, I've met a lot of wonderful people." I face the group of females sitting around my seat. "My team, directors like Kirby Steve," a nervous chuckle escapes my lips, "countless amazing performers, and my fans. People like you guys are helping to make the industry a better place. Thank you for this award." The crowd erupts into another applause.
I step off the stage, returning to my seat but not sitting. Instead, I set the award on the table. My manager, Emma Crow, spoke first. "Congratulations, sweetie."
"How do you feel?" My agent, Andrea Will, touches my arm.
"I'm fine. I'll be back."
"Where are you going?" My assistant, Roy Manson, furrows his thin brows.
"I need a cigarette." I yank away from Andrea' touch and leave out the double doors. Down the long hallway, I enter the convention of dildo stands and naked models on stage. Raunchy music blares through the multiple speakers, the vulgar lyrics are amplified through my soft-pointed ears. I search the crowd, though I know the man wouldn't stay inside.
Once outside, I happen to look left where said man stood with a cigarette. There are tears in his eyes when he looks over. "Dad..." I step up to him, matching his tall height. "What are you doing here?"
Dad wipes the tears from his cheeks. "I could ask you the same thing, son." There's weight in his words.
I search the parking lot for my answer. "I just won a very prestigious award." My eyes fall back on him. "Millions of people love me. My team keeps me safe." I shake my head. "I'm tested every few months."
"They love you for the wrong reason!" Dad snaps. "You're selling your body and recording it for millions to see."
"I love being seen, Dad!" I raise my voice. People notice our argument but keep on walking.
"I see you, Vehren. I've seen enough of you actually."
"No..." I tilt my head dramatically, "you haven't." My head straightens and raises. "You have no idea how powerful I am. I can change people's lives."
"By spreading your cheeks?" Dad scoffs hard.
I roll my eyes. "By being myself."
"Thi-" Dad wants to touch me, but he's disgusted. He tosses out the cigarette and finishes his sentence, "This isn't you!"
"You don't know who I am." I chuckle lightly. "I barely know who I am. It's okay because I'm going to figure it out. "
"This is all wrong, son. God doesn't like ugly, and this is the highest form of hideous."
I smile, feeling anger rise up my throat. Heat clutches my insides. He doesn't understand, and he never will. We stare at each other for a second until I say, "God made me beautiful. Maybe he does make mistakes." I can see Dad bite his tongue. His eyes are a light brown with a vibrant blue ring wrapped around, mine are an exact match.
"This is not how your mother and I raised you. I don't know what's gotten into you, Vehren. I don't like it."
"You never liked me." I told my arms. "You never liked me because I'm gay. And I'll never know what Mom thinks, maybe her love would've been different. Maybe things would've been different. But she's dead, and things are as they are now."
"What are you talking about?! You are a father! Are you okay with your daughter being a whore just like you?"
My eyes shut and I take a deep breath. "I'm okay as long as she's aware of what's coming and is ready for it." I open them, staring hard. "Like me. Hopefully, she'll have a better chance at life."
"She won't if you make it difficult on her."
I play with my jaw. "She's going to have an amazing life; I'll make sure of it."
"Sure you will." Dad faces the parking lot. "I'm going home, Vehren. I'm in shock and disgust that you're doing this. You can do anything, I made sure of that, and this is what you choose? To be a degenerate?"
"Maybe I like it, Dad!" I raise my arms. "Maybe I'm okay with being a slut."
"No one else is."
I bite my lower lip. "If you're done, I have a ceremony to return to. Like I said, I just won an award for being a slut."
"Yeah, I am. Don't go to Hell, Vehren." Dad walks off into the parking lot without another word. I don't break face heading back inside.
Back in the hall, another star has won an award. I sit in my seat, leaning over to Andrea. "Sorry, my dad was here."
Her jaw drops. "Holy shit." She looks at Emma and Roy before coming back to me. "Is everything okay?"
"No, but I will be."