"Please forgive me, I didn't think the crowd would get this big" Andrea begged while holding his hands.
"You're forgiven, let's just go home, I need to take a shower, I feel disgusting" Alex said, the cold sweat drenching his clothes felt sticky and itchy. This had been the most uncomfortable moment of his life.
"About that, Julian said he wanted to see me after the show, I was going to ask you to come with me, but if it's too much for you I understand and I'll go home with you" Andrea lowered her teary eyes, her voice cracked. He might´ve had issues understanding social cues but he wasn't an idiot and he could tell when she was trying to manipulate him.
"You owe me one. Let's go see your boyfriend" He felt relieved people left fast so he could walk without feeling like drowning.
"you're the best of the best, little bro" Andrea smiled and stopped herself before grabbing his hand. Sometimes he wondered how someone like her could be related to someone like him, genetics were a funny thing.
They stepped out the emergency door, a couple of guys were carrying the instruments and speakers and putting them away in a black van. Andrea squealed and jumped into the arms of a big, bald and tall man who looked like he could be an extra in a 90's vampire movie. Alex supposed that was Julian. The rasping sound of a lighter caught his attention and he turned. The keyboardist was standing a few feet from them smoking.
"Has anybody told you smoking is terrible for your vocal cords?" Alex approached the man and stood beside him covering his mouth.
"Has anybody told you to mind your business?" The man contorted his lips in what could only be described as a fake smile and blew the smoke on Alex's face.
"Montag, be nice" Julian's voice interrupted their exchange.
"If I were nicer, I'd be a puppy, he's the one bothering me" Montag threw the half-smoked cigarette on the floor and stomped on it "let's go now, I'm getting indigestion" he walked past Alex bumping his shoulder.
Alex couldn't stop himself "Montag? That's a ridiculous stage name"
"Alex…" Andrea gasped and approached him
"That's not a stage name, that's my actual name, my mom was a pretentious woman and I agree, is ridiculous" Montag took out a phone and started typing "If you're not ready to leave now, I'm gonna call an Uber. Bye." he grabbed a pair of AirPods from his pocket and walked back into the building.
Alex saw him walk away and sighted. He never thought he could meet someone more unapproachable than him. Well, he wasn't looking for any friends. He just wanted to go home, take a shower and study.
"Andrea, I'm hungry, tired and burned out. Let's go, now." He took out his phone but Andrea stopped him.
"I haven't introduced you" She gestured towards Julian "This is Julian"
"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out, you were on top of him minutes ago" He knew he sounded aggressive but his social battery was depleted, he couldn't take another minute in the company of people, including his sister.
"you're a fucking dick" she pushed him "call a Uber or whatever, I'm not going with you" she grabbed Julian's hand and dragged him towards the van.
"As you wish" Alex shrugged and took out his phone. Riding a stranger's car without the comforting presence of his family was hell but he wasn't going to let her know that.
Half an hour later he was fumbling through his pockets searching for his keys in front of his apartment. When he opened the door, a black cat meowed loudly and bit his ankle. Nandor. He tapped it on the head while removing his shoes.
"You have to stop asking for cuddles so aggressively" he picked the cat up and kissed its fluffy forehead "your mom abandoned you for a bald bassist" he left it on the couch and walked to his room.
He felt disgusting, wherever he smelled he could only perceive cigarette smoke, his shirt was sticking to his back and his skin felt prickly. He hadn't had a panic attack in months and now he felt like an idiot for trusting his sister. Despite being younger, sometimes he felt he had to take care of her and it was taking a toll on his mental health. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and got ready for a shower.
Morning came with a headache so intense he had to stay in bed until noon. He hated wasting time and counting the night before he had lost almost a whole day, but this always happened after a panic attack, he was rendered useless. He got up and for a minute considered taking an ibuprofen but to drink it on an empty stomach was a crime against his gastric lining.
The sounds coming from the kitchen meant Andrea managed to get home safe. He walked out of his room and sat on the living room couch staring directly at the kitchen. His sister had her headphones on while mixing some batter and wasn't aware he had woken up. Alex waited until she noticed him. She removed her headphones and sighted loudly.
"I know what you're going to say, you're going to suggest living apart. You know we can't do that." She approached him and sat next to him without touching him.
"I can't keep being a victim of your emotions, Andrea. You are fully aware of how much I hate situations like last night´s and you abandoned me not once but twice."
"Look-" she interrupted him.
"No, let me speak, I'm done being treated as a child. Last night proved I might be younger but I'm more responsible, I can't keep on living with you. You're a temperamental, irrational person and I have too much on my plate to deal with your drama" He stood up and walked to the kitchen, putting distance between them. "I'll be talking to mom and dad and convincing them to let me get my own place."
"I'm irrational? you're too biased to notice your behavior isn't normal, you don't act like a normal 22 year old, you don't have friends, you can't stand people touching you, you complain about everything and everything gives you a panic attack. Do you think I don't want to live alone? I'm 24, I should be living a full life but I have to babysit my brother because he can't function in a normal society!" She ran her hands through her hair, the brown locks, the color so similar to his own hair, covering her shoulders "I don't know how you think you'll be able to survive med school if you can't survive life. You're exhausting!"
"I never asked you to do that, I'm aware we're opposites, I'm aware I don't fit into your idea of "normalcy" but you make me sound unfit to live. I don't want to live here anymore, I don't want to feel your pitiful gaze as if I'm somehow inferior and I surely don't want you to waste your wonderful and fulfilling life as an aspiring actress because of me"
"You're a mean piece of shit" she laughed and got off the couch. "let's just forget this argument occurred and let me make you some pancakes"
She was mental.
"Are you insane?" he looked at her smiling face and felt the confusion rising
"No, I just think it's a waste of time to hurt each other over stuff we can't change, at the end of the day you're my brother and I love you." she walked past him and took a pan out of the cabinet "Also, mom and dad are not going to let you live alone and i'm too close to my 25th birthday to jeopardize the access to my trust fund because of a silly argument"
"it is not a silly argument, i want to be independent" he clutched his hands in frustration.
"You don't even have a job, what independence? Look, dude, if you really want to be the "greatest pathologist in New York" you have to bear with our living situation, you know it's non-negotiable" She poured a spoonful of batter on the hot pan and started humming something. It seemed the conversation was over for her.