Mikkeli POV
I wake up in the morning engulfed with the most delightful scent.
I take a look at Hannah sleeping soundly in my arms, and I can't stop a warm feeling in my chest even though my heart is still heavy; the events of yesterday keep hunting me. I put my nose into her hair, inhaling, feeling as if she was the only light in the darkness that surrounds me.
I think about what she did for me yesterday after my breakdown. No one has held me for many years, no one has comforted me for many years, and no one has been so close to me for many years.
Yesterday, after I stopped sobbing in her arms, she made me get up and helped me clean myself from all the blood and sweat, or should I say she cleaned me herself. I was so numb. There was no will to do anything in me. I just allowed her to do whatever she wanted.
Her touch was very soothing, gentle, and full of care. I think I have never been handled with such care in my whole life, as if I was important, as if I was worth being taken care of. And for the first time in my life, I felt that there was no shame in being sad, in being devastated, in showing weakness.
After she washed me, she gently dried and brushed my hair, helped me back to my bedroom, and went to my closet to find some clean clothes. She left me to get dressed and returned to the bathroom to clean herself.
When she came back, I felt much calmer, but I was still numb and felt unable to do anything. Seriously, I just thought she would leave, but she didn't. She went to my closet, put on one of my T-shirts, and came back to bed, where I was sitting.
"It's time to get some sleep," she told me all this time, only that one sentence.
I laid myself down and let her put her head on my chest; I hugged her closer to me with my arm and let my eyes shut. The only thing Byron and I were focused on at this moment was the warmth of her body, the calming sound of her heartbeat. That's when I finally realized how tired I was and how much I wanted to be allowed to rest.
Now after many hours of sleep, I still feel tired, I still feel guilty, and full of sorrow. Killing them hasn't given me any satisfaction. Honestly, I didn't do it to get some satisfaction. I just wanted to go to Kyle and tell him that they would never get near him again.
I mindlink Rose to ask her for breakfast, but Hannah still doesn't wake up. When a couple of minutes later, I open the door, and Rose enters with a tray of food, which she puts on the table.
"Kyle?" I ask her.
"He's still sleeping. I was sitting with him during the night; Hayden was sleeping with my grandchildren," she answers me but looks at Hannah.
"I haven't done anything," I say. "You can tell Hayden so he won't be so tense."
"Hayden is just worried about her, I am worried about her, and I'm pretty sure I have reasons to."
A spark of irritation gets through me, but she gives me a sharp look, and I swallow my frustration.
"You all worry too much. Hannah is not a child," I reply.
"No, she's not. She's a young woman who has been through a lot, and staying here puts her only through much more, and she shouldn't have to deal with that. Gideon is with Kyle. He will mindlink you when Kyle wakes up."
After she's gone, I try not to think too much about what she has just said. I just look at my mate sleeping soundly, taking in how beautiful she looks. I gently touch her cheek to wake her up. For a moment, she looks at me in confusion as if she didn't know where she is.
"How is Kyle?" she asks and sits up.
"Still asleep, are you hungry? Breakfast is here," I say, and she nods.
"And how are you feeling?" I hear her voice behind my back.
I leave an untouched tray with food and go back to sit on the bed.
"Bitter, angry, guilty, sad. I am the Alpha of this pack, and still, I allowed something like that to happen to my younger brother."
"It wasn't your fault Mikkeli; you couldn't have foreseen this."
"Still, first my mother, later you, now Kyle. It seems like bad things always keep happening to the ones I care about."
"But they all are dead now. My rapists, Kyle's rapists, your mother's rapists."
I look at her with mixed emotions. I'm not surprised that she knows about my mother; after all, Kyle is her friend, and they trust and confide in each other. Of course, he would have told her about that incident.
"I'm so sorry, Hannah; I'm so sorry that I tried to force you. I know there is no excuse for what I tried to do to you," my voice is shaking, and I hang my head low in shame.
She lifts her hand and gently touches my face, making me look at her.
"Mikkeli, you did wrong, but you manage to stop, and that's what matters," she says, and I let myself squeeze her hand.
"I should have noticed earlier you and Kyle resemble each other very much, more than you and Hayden," she continues changing the subject.
"My mother's name was Cara; when I started school, she used to help twice a week in Tony's house; his father was our Head Warrior. Both he and my stepmother always made sure that I visited his house on those days. Cara was always very nice to me. I was an Alpha's son, so people bow in respect to me, but it wasn't for me; it was because of who my father was. But with her, it was like she cared about me. She always did those small things which helped me feel better, like asking about my grades, sneaking my favorite desserts." I say a bit shyly.
"Why does nobody know about Kyle being your brother, including him?"
"At the beginning, it was because it was safer for him not to know. Hayden's mother left, and my father was pretty violent during that time, so it was better that he didn't know that the orders never to reveal the truth had been somehow broken. Kyle was too young; he could have talked with the wrong person. Later when my mother found her mate, and he wanted to take her and Kyle away from here, it was decided that she would tell him after they leave the pack territory, but as you remember, that never happened. And after she died, after my father died and I became Alpha, there was really no time for that. I had to make sure that I could manage as a new leader. The beginning was quite rough, and I didn't want to worry about Kyle, additionally, about my enemies targeting him. Rose did well as his guardian, he was taken care of and seemed happy, so I didn't think it was necessary to disturb his peace."
Honestly, I feel weird; to this day, I have only spoken about my mother with Tony. As my Beta and best friend, he's the only one knowing all my secrets. Now, sitting so close to her, sharing with her my painful past, I don't feel vulnerable as I have always thought I would.
"Let's eat before everything Rose prepared will get cold, and I will have to go to take care of alliance and Ryan's men pulling more shit," I say, and Hannah gives me a tiny smile.
We are eating in silence when Gideon mindlinks to me that Kyle has woken up. We immediately go into the infirmary, even though I'm scared. I'm scared to see him, I'm scared to talk with him, I know I must face him, but I'm scared to do that.
Kyle is sitting on the bed, still bruised; he doesn't look any better than yesterday. His wolf must be pretty much wounded mentally, so he's not healing him properly. He's obviously in a lot of physical pain, but I'm more concerned about his mental state.
When my mother was raped, she didn't leave her room for many days, mostly lying in bed. Kyle was all the time with her because she refused to part with him for even a second. I know from Rose that he used to spend days clingy to her as a little koala. I remember when she let me in her room after some time, saying she was OK, but I saw in her eyes how broken she was. So pale, so fragile, still at the brink of breakdown.
The same feelings I see now when I see Kyle's face. He avoids looking at me, ready to burst into tears any moment. Hannah is immediately next to him, and he is also almost instantly glued to her as if she was his lifesaver. I raise my hand to pat his head as I'm used to doing, but he flinches away from me and presses himself more into Hannah. I sigh and take my hand back.
"Sorry, Alpha," he whispers, still not looking at me.
"Kyle, I want to tell you that they are dead; all of them are dead."
That statement makes him look at me. I can see that he's shocked.
"How?" he asks with a trembling voice; all his posture is trembling.
"I killed them," I say, trying to be as calm as possible; I need to be the strong one here. "I challenged them, and I killed them. You are safe; no one will ever touch you".
Kyle nods, but he doesn't look convinced; his lips are shaking, and his fists are squeezing the bedsheets, while Hannah still has her arms wrapped around him, holding his head pressed to her shoulder.
The door to the room gets opened, and Hayden, along with Gideon, comes inside.
"Kyle, how are you feeling?" asks Gideon. "I know you are very sore, but do you have any places particularly painful?"
Kyle shakes his head as in answer, just like with me; he also doesn't look at Gideon.
"Alright, you have no serious internal wounds; your broken bones are healing even though they are healing slowly. You should be on bed rest for the next week at least, but you can stay in your room; there's no point in staying here in the infirmary."
As Kyle doesn't say anything, Hannah is the one answering.
"I can look after him today and as long as he wants me to."
I nod in agreement, and then I go with Hayden to my office; seeing Kyle longer and so broken makes my rage increase. I'm afraid I can do something impulsive, and of course, he doesn't need it.
"So, little brother," Hayden decides to break the silence, "any more family secrets you keep away from me?"
"This family for sure has too many secrets," I say in a mocking way, "and suddenly, all of them decided to make themselves known just within a couple of months. I have one more secret to tell you. Kyle is your brother too; according to my mother, we all had the same father."
Hayden takes a deep breath and stays quiet for some time.
"Kyle was born an omega, so our father refused to acknowledge him. He didn't care about him, so he let him be. Knowing father's horny nature, I wonder how many more siblings we still have out there," says Hayden in a cold voice.
He doesn't seem hurt, which doesn't make me surprised. After all, he managed to sort his feelings towards our father many years ago, something I have never done, something I still am afraid to do.
"Mikkeli, I'm so sorry."
"For what?" I say, raising my eyebrows in surprise.
"I'm sorry I haven't been a good enough brother. I'm sorry you had to go through all of this alone. Through our childhood, through your mother's rape, through her death, and now through this."
Before I can answer, the door to my office gets opened once again, and Jake goes inside.
"Full Moon pack is packing; Ryan made the scene this morning during the breakfast trying to shift the responsibility for the incident on us but don't worry, Alpha Kayden was there and asked him openly if he intended to desert the upcoming mission because of his busted ego. After that, I talked with him alone, and I'm sure he will follow our plan even though he is extremely unhappy with it."
"Thank you, Jake, good job," I say and slowly bow to him to show my respect.
"Ryan was always a fucking peacock, too busy in indulging himself than in taking care of training his own people. And Connie wants to talk with you before they leave. I know you are not in the mood, but please be at least polite; it would be better if they leave without any more incidents."
I nod to make him realize that I understand and intend to follow his advice. Jake turns around to leave but stops by the door.
"And by the way, good job Alpha, you showed every single one of our allies that you are not to be treated lightly ever. Your father would be proud".
Usually, when I hear things like that from Jake, they made me happy, probably because he rarely says things like that. Now when I think about that, he's never actually praised me directly during my whole life. He always does it for my father. I presume Jake will always be my father's Beta, no matter how much time will pass.
Hayden also leaves my office as Connie enters it. I swallow my frustration. I'm not in the mood to talk with her.
"First of all, I want to say I'm sorry about what happened, our warriors should have never behaved that way, and I fully understand why you did what you did, but I also want to know if my suspicions are true?"
"What suspicious?" I ask.
"That human girl is your mate. I'm not sure, but I think there is a high possibility that I'm right. I'm also sure after our victory with the hunters. We will gather here once again for a celebration. By that time, I want her gone if you still consider mating with me and merging our packs."
"And what makes you think that I want her gone?" I ask again, and she gives me a sarcastic smirk.
"I have considered mating with you in the first place, Mikkeli, because we are the same. We are ambitious, and we like power. Our packs' merge is a deal, and it's a good deal, Mikkeli, but if you still want this deal, your unwanted mate must be rejected".
"And what if I don't want this deal anymore?"
"Well, then the deal is off, but Mikkeli, you will always choose more power above anything else, especially above one small girl who means nothing. You are just unwanted mates to each other. Nothing more. I'll wait for your final answer; good luck at war" she stands and leaves.
After the Full Moon pack is gone, I go to the training grounds and spend my day doing my routine things. I train, talk with my allies, and ignore all the looks. I know my pack is gossiping, probably about my and Kyle's relationship.
But I can also see that they are pleased, pleased that I made a point and showed everybody I will always defend my pack members. It was also a big display of power, even though that wasn't my purpose.
I didn't care what my pack would think, what other packs would think; I wanted them dead because they had hurt my brother, I wanted them dead because they had abused a weaker wolf, I wanted them dead because scums like that hadn't deserved to be warriors.
A couple of hours later, I come back home, but I'm not in the mood for any paperwork, so I push it on Tony and Hayden and go upstairs to know how Kyle is doing. I'm not surprised that Hannah is still with him.
They sit on the bed, he is lying with his back pressed to her chest, and she's holding him with her arms wrapped around him tightly. I intend to knock, but the door is slightly ajar, and I can see them as they don't see me.
"I heard them downstairs, but I didn't think anything would happen. I finished cleaning; they noticed me when I was walking down. There were two of them, but I could smell alcohol from them. They started checking me up and down, and I couldn't leave because they were blocking my way. But I knew that they were going to do something bad, I should have mindlinked somebody, but I was so scared and I couldn't concentrate when they dragged me to one of the bedrooms," Kyle sobs in Hannah's arms. "It was awful, Hannah, disgusting; I don't even remember how many times they did it. When the rest of them came? I feel so dirty, so gross..."
He starts crying harder, and I clench my fists, feeling my nails cutting my skin. The blood starts dripping.
"You are not gross, Kyle," Hannah says in a coaxing voice" You are strong, beautiful, and brave. They were dirty and gross, not you."
"They said all omegas are nothing more than breeding stock. I didn't even put up a fight; I just laid there; I let them," Kyle manages to whisper between his sobs.
"That still wasn't your fault Kyle; bad things don't happen because we are weaker or scared; it happens because of bad people doing it".
I finally decide to make myself noticed and gently knock on the door and push it as I enter the room.
Kyle and Hannah look at me; he is still crying when he asks me:
"Are you angry with me because I've almost destroyed the alliance?"
"No, they've almost destroyed the alliance, not you. I know that it will take time for you to feel better, but they are gone, none of this was your fault, and I'm not angry with you." I take a deep breath " I'm so sorry, Kyle; I'm sorry I didn't manage to keep you safe. You will probably be very angry with me, but I have to tell you something because I want you to hear that from me."
He just looks at me. I can clearly see the confusion on his face.
"Kyle, I want you to know that we are brothers. The same woman gave birth to both of us. We couldn't tell you before because of our father. When I was born, he didn't allow our mother to raise me; when you were born, he didn't...."
"He didn't care because I was an omega," Kyle finishes my sentence.
"Yes," I give him a sad look," I found out about our mother when I was 12; father was still alive, and we both, mom and I, kept it away from you because you were a small child. It was safer that way. And later, when I became an Alpha, I didn't tell you because I thought it would still be safer for you. I'm sorry if you are angry with me for hiding the truth, but I want you to know that I promised our mother that I would protect you, and I'm sorry I failed you. I'm so, so sorry, Kyle."