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Chapter 28 - My choice

Hannah POV

Mikkeli started screaming after two days. 

It has been a very painful mix of howling and whimpering, I can only imagine how loud he must be screaming if I can hear him from the living room from time to time, in how much pain Byron and he must be in. 

The packhouse is mostly empty. Tony, who is now in charge of the pack, has made sure that everyone who hasn't had to be here is somewhere else. It's not good for the pack members to witness their Alpha's suffering. 

 Gideon is responsible for taking care of Mikkel, which consists mainly of checking if he's still alive. I ask him twice every hour what is happening, but he only keeps reassuring me that the situation is under control, but at the same time, he's avoiding looking at me, so I'm also sure that the situation is very far away from being under control.

 Hayden keeps calming me down too, ensuring me that Mikkeli is strong and nothing bad will happen. And just like Gideon, he also avoids looking into my eyes.

Only Becca seems to be honest with me. She and a couple of warriors are all the time in the house just in case anything happened. She says that the biggest problem now is that we don't know how the situation will progress and that time is not in our favor. In a week, we will have a war, and we don't know if Mikkeli can be strong enough or even be able to take part in it. This is very bad for the fighting spirit in the pack. I appreciate her honesty, but I also have to appreciate my responsibility in this. 

 All this is happening because Mikkeli doesn't want to force me into mating with him. So he decided to risk his life, maybe risk the future of his people.

My siblings seem scared because of the tense situation in the house, and I'm so worried that I'm not helping in any way to calm them down. Rose and Hayden are mostly time in charge of them. After all, I cannot focus because I cannot sleep. 

I've spent the last few days pacing all the time around my room, unable to do anything. I feel like crying; I keep praying that the next couple of hours of Mikkeli's rut will be his last one. I know he is hurting and in pain and maybe on the verge of dying. 

But even though it has been four days already, the werewolf's Moon Goddess isn't so merciful.

With each Mikkeli's scream, I feel my heart breaks a little bit. With each Byron's painful howl, I feel pain going down my body. I know I am the one who has to make it better. I know Hayden will be extremely against it, and I know when Mikkeli will get better, he will be extremely pissed off at me if I do it, but I also know that it's my choice to be made, not theirs, and with that resolution, I knock to the alpha's office.

 I hear Tony's voice inviting me in; I take a deep breath and enter.

"Hannah, do you need anything?" He asks; he looks tired and worried; I doubt he's sleeping well these days, just like me.

"We need to talk about Mikkeli," I say, sitting in front of him.

"Situation is under control, and Alpha's orders were clear; he will be fine" his voice is so empty of any emotions.

"I came to you not because you are Beta but because you are Mikkeli's best friend. I know that situation is not good. I know you all are lying to me about his condition and that we don't have time. Every moment we are doing nothing, we only risk Mikkeli's and Byron's lives more. Don't interrupt me; please listen. I know Mikkeli is not ready to mark me, and he will never forgive me as much as I will not forgive myself if he does it in his state, but correct me if what I say is wrong. Rut enforces mating, not marking. It can be stopped immediately with sexual intercourse?"

"That is right, but Mikkeli won't be able to control himself enough, and Byron will push for marking, and with that..." says Tony, but I interrupt him.

"What if I take more wolfsbane? Plus, you keep giving Mikkeli silver shots. Is there a chance that this will be sufficient to prevent marking, but at the same time, I will be allowed to have sex with Mikkeli and stop his rut?"

For a moment, he looks like he wants to say no, but soon I notice he starts analyzing what I've just said.

"I will have to talk about it with Gideon, but there's another problem. Mikkeli will be unable to stop; he may hurt you unwillingly. Do you understand that there will be no turning back? You will have to accept everything he decides to do or, more likely, Byron's instincts decide to do."

For a moment, I'm quiet, thinking about what I have just been told. I was dreaming about having sex with Mikkeli for a long time, but I kept pushing these thoughts away from me, especially since everybody seemed to be against that idea. 

But I know I can't take it anymore. I refuse to accept his suffering; I refuse to watch him suffer. I would prefer our relationship to progress slowly, but I no longer have the comfort of deciding about it, and neither does Mikkeli.

"Mates are created in the heavens; isn't that what you all believe? I am his mate, I was created especially for him, and he was created especially for me so he will not hurt me. I just have to be sure he won't mark me because I don't want to tie him to me for eternity if he still has any doubts about it. In the state he is in right now, it will be more me forcing him than the opposite. It's me who's going to disrespect his choice or, more likely, take his choice away from him, but he endangers his life, and that's why it's my choice to be made, not his. Talk with Gideon and make sure that Hayden doesn't intervene; I ask you for this because you are Mikkeli's friend. "

The next hours are absolutely hectic. 

I'm suddenly surrounded by so many people, and almost every one of them seems to have something to say. Hayden is furious; he keeps screaming that I'll do this over his dead body. Gideon tries to keep himself professional by counting the proper amount of wolfsbane, but it's obvious that he's also against my decision. Rose, in the beginning, tries to talk me out of this, but after a while, she gives up and just hugs me. Only Kyle doesn't say anything except to ask me only once if I'm sure, which I confirm. Finally, Tony is fed up with arguing with Hayden and uses his rank to force him into obedience.

"Hayden, I know you are worried, all of you are worried, but I made the decision, and it's my decision, not yours. You may not like it, or you may oppose it, but you have to respect it. I trust you will take care of my siblings until I'm back." I say and give him a stern look.

"I don't want anything to happen to you," he says with a broken voice.

Finally, Gideon gives me my tenth wolfsbane injection for it to work quicker than drinking it. After that, Tony takes me downstairs to the basement, we stop in front of the safe room, and he looks at me.

"You have no idea how much I'm grateful to you. I don't want him to suffer. I'm sorry if it looks like I'm choosing him over you," his voice is trembling.

I understand he feels guilty because, in the whole pack, he was the only one capable of preventing this.

"Now, Mikkeli is chained to the wall because he kept hurting himself. He's dirty and exhausted. The water is in the corner of the room. We have security cameras there, but I will turn them off. I will only check every 5 minutes to see if anything is wrong and if you are in danger. It will be only me who watches. If you feel that you can't take it anymore, just look directly in the door direction, and I promise I will come. But make sure you want it because if anybody interrupts this mating, Mikkeli will attack, so I will have to hurt him seriously to get you out."

With that, he puts his arms around me, and we are hugging each other for a long moment. Then he opens the door, and then I enter, and the door is closed behind me.

There is no sound as I enter the room. 

At the end of it, on the bedding placed on the floor, sits naked Mikkeli, with both his hands and neck chained to the wall; I see blood dripping from it; I'm sure he was struggling a lot in it. 

His red, tired eyes are looking at me, his breath is shallow, and his hair is tangled and wet because of sweat, and he shivers. He shivers so much; his body is covert with claws mark, probably self-inflicted.

 He looks as if he was tortured these past days, and I'm sure that's probably how it felt, even though nobody wanted to hurt him.

I take a deep breath once again. I need to be the one to fix it. I have to be the strong one. 

First, I decided to give him some water. As I come closer to him, he snarls as if he wanted to chase me away, but when I put the cup next to his lips, he doesn't protest and quickly drinks everything. 

 I make a move toward his chains, I want to take them off, but he starts thrashing like crazy, hurting himself even more, so I abandon this idea. Instead, I stand up and take off my pants, staying only in my underwear and T-shirt. His eyes immediately go black, and he starts whimpering. At the same time, he tries to move away from me, which of course, is impossible because of his chains. 

 I sit next to him, wrapping my arms around his torso and putting my head on his chest. He immediately starts sniffing my hair. I can feel how tense his muscles are and how weak his heartbeat is; he shivers in my arms but makes no more attempt to stay away from me.

I don't know how long I'm hugging him like that, trying not to look too much at his naked body. Then suddenly, his cold skin starts getting hotter and hotter, his heart starts beating like crazy, and I could hear him inhaling air rapidly. In a matter of seconds, he is burning and panting; I see that he is in more pain.

I put my hands on his stomach as I touch his nipple with my tongue, I can feel his body wiggle under the sensation, and a small moan leaves his lips. His nipple is getting harder as I keep sucking it. I don't have to look down to know that he is hard, very hard. I start moving my lips down to his stomach, licking and teasing his sensitive skin; I feel his muscles tensing under my tongue.

I can see the tip of his member leaking as I put my mouth on it; it's heavy on my tongue and salty with the taste of precum. I take him deeper, as deep as I can possibly take. He roars and starts moving his hips. I put my hands on his tights, trying to stabilize myself. My lips and tongue are wrapped around his length, going in and out of my mouth. 

I know he is close, but suddenly my sassy second nature comes around. I move a little away from him, robbing him away of the sensation of my mouth around him. He whimpers in distress and grits his teeth. I smirk as I pull off my panties; my T-shirt is long enough not to let him see anything. 

I can see that he's frustrated and desperate to feel me again. And I enjoy the small moment of dominance, this small moment of me being completely in power over him. 

I straddle him, sliding his hard cock inside me, it's still wet with my saliva, and I'm also so aroused it goes inside easily. It's big; I can feel my muscles stretched, filling me up entirely. I put my hands on his shoulders and start moving my hips. His sharp fangs extend as if he wanted to bite me, but I know he can't because his neck is immobilized and because of wolfsbane in my veins. 

For a moment, it's just me who's moving, my hips go back and forward, and he just takes it, sounds of groaning leaving his half-opened mouth. His eyes are shut, which doesn't satisfy me; I want him to look at me; I want him to see only me. I latch my lips on him, my tongue immediately enters his mouth, and start exploring every bit of space as I keep moving my hips. I can feel the blood when his sharp fangs bite my lips. 

We keep sucking, biting, and touching for so long that I can almost feel the lack of oxygen. When we are finally forced to stop to take some air into our lungs, he looks at me, with his shifted black eyes, with Byron's eyes. 

He roars again and starts thrusting into me as I try to keep up with the speed of his hips. We both keep moaning and panting, I dig my nails into his shoulders, and I feel him getting even bigger inside of me as we both reach our climax. His hot cum shots in me as my muscles clenched around his member. I feel myself tremble because of my orgasm as I lie on top of him, breathing heavily.

For a moment, we are still to catch our breaths, then I take Mikkeli's face in both of my hands and look him straight in the eyes. 

I know what I have to do. I know what I want to do.

"You cannot mark me, Byron, but I want you. I want to mate with both of you," I say as I reach and unlock his chains.