It all started when she left home and went to another city.

She left for a new school, it was so cool.

Meeting new people, having more freedom, visiting new places.

  She was excited at first because she didn't know what was going to happen after.

The first days were pretty peaceful and exciting,  she started her "new little life".

She met with new people, she talked to new people, she hung out with new people, and she was hoping to make new friends, that's all she was thinking about.

I mean her last years weren't the best, in fact, no year of her life was the best, she suffered a lot and of course, you can notice that just by talking to her.

she was insecure, a people pleaser, a pushover and she especially craved male attention, I mean she never had any romantic relationship before, guys barely saw her as a girl, she was bullied, and they made fun of her most of the time.

pretty tough, huh? She got used to it after all that time, I mean it was more than ten years.

she had many "friends" but her best friends were the books her father used to buy for her, they were good for her, and they helped her survive all those years. how? They distracted her from the world's disgusting reality, they made her a little universe where she is the  "perfect" girl.

day after day she got pretty good at enduring the pain when she wasn't supposed even to show it to anyone, no one was going to understand what she was living and how she was feeling about all of it.

she settled for all of that because she thought it was the best she deserved and she should be thankful for it, as a teenager, she lived those years with a lot of gratitude and she had her own definition of satisfaction, she was pretty positive and she wasn't the kind of person to make anything a big deal she overcame all the troubles on her own and with her own ways.

but now she is in a better place, she is prettier, she is more sociable and she's more confident, all of these things made her see life in a different way but not that different.

in fact, she wanted to do things she couldn't do back when she was home.

she wanted to go to places she knew she wasn't supposed to.

she wanted to befriend people and she started to talk to different kinds of people, then she befriended the bad ones (I mean, she hated those kinds of people all her life and she judged them pretty hard).

oh my god! 'now guys are interested in her', she was so happy about the attention she was getting from those few guys she knew and of course, she stuck to her new "almost perfect" personality, because it literally gave her everything she could ask for.

you could say she never felt that happy in her entire life.

she gained confidence but her insecurities didn't leave her side, they accompanied her everywhere.