I handled it all the way back then. I was ful ready for World Cup though. It was difficult for me to start a way from where some play stopped. I welcomed them as warm heart. Quite enough for things to be normal once again. It was a positive movement with other players. I got married with him on 2021. It was in Feb. Whatever we stayed like we needed too. Just some lakings left behind all the way back then. His friends started giving supportive hands to us. I was too fool to believe them. Maybe I wasn't wrong back then. I trusted them lightly. It stayed for 3 years, which is more beatable than 3 months. Yup, you should trust one fully after having decade-doubt within months. So three months are equal to three years. I don't have any sense to make any calm movement out of one who necessarily needs feedbacks for spaces. I need no excuse to escape. His brother, Reven agreed for our wedding literally after weeks. It was brutal having him aside. So it went for years and standed to 2023. The year when Kane Richardson got married. Though Starcy was good fit for him, unfortunately got private affair with [I don't want to mention]. Richie is doing well, living well. God bless them. He was so happy when I got married. I remember him dancing on the floor with wide soul with me and others fella. Matter turned when Smith and he got mind-fight just before Richardson's wedding. Yeah still remembers things started getting changed since then. Smith told me about Sean Abbott, the one who loved him once when he was international captain. I was okay with it that he didn't mention it to me when we were in relation. He told me after 2 years of wedding. Maybe he didn't care nor he did feel right to feel IT right. I don't know it was all his choice to reject him. I was again wrong thinking that he loved me then too. I wasn't there around him juggling, if he accepted him then maybe I'd never have lived or would never be able to see him again with me standing beside. I feel every inch of disappointment when a friend loves a friend's relation with another and instantly got changed by mood and started supporting other. Yup, right, I was right. The friends who showed supportive hand few months after we got relation, the same friends betrayed the trust I showed and then started supporting Abbott. Ridiculous!! Two exclametory mark- one for They are actually so strange to believe, two for that's how fast trust turned? I never said a word to them, never. I always share my feelings to Richardson, the mate I've got each times, every single time when I got trouble, I got joy, each times. I feel more happy to share things with him. He is the Best. Whatever, when they heard the same thing I heard I remind myself Smith told the same thing to them too. I'm not so sure about that. It's so normal that you rejected someone who you never liked. But I'm rotating that matter more than it should be. I freezed in somewhere, I never deserved. When I heard Smith did so much wrong rejected him, I died. I died thinking what was my fault then? His friends were all turned together with the decision that Smith should have gone with Sean even NOW. Even when we're married, even whatever happened with me... he just had to get with Sean. I don't know how someone can be so much cruel living in the world with the heart on their left site, beating without any reason. I never said anything to Smith. Maybe I cried on Richardson's shoulder few days. Maybe I didn't eat much. Maybe I controlled my emotions just beacuse he was playing Test. I could be beside him, caring what he need. I just been humble enough and I couldn't be more than I need. Just Richie was alongside mine. I don't yell at anyone. Just waving hands, it was the limitation. If he even divorce me, I'd never stand front of him. I had to divorce him too even if I didn't want. He has got the power over me. I don't care cause it wasn't effecting me either. But when I felt it, I felt so low, so much low. I don't know, just praying to God I'd never receive the divorce paper from him. Never. I don't have any sense that how he taken me all the years. Maybe I wasn't so better, maybe I wasn't perfect for him. He never said a word to me. So I was insane thinking I was better for him. Insane cause I can't be Ron.