I slept late at night at 2 pm I think. Really I am a scum. I started reading a ln even knowing that I get addicted to them. I did not even study yesterday night. Reading the ln whole time ugh
I really don't fucking get it why am I doing things like this I felt sleepy all day.
And I downloaded insta late at night and got hooked up at it. And that's not the only thing I masturbated late at night. Now it has really became a addiction. I know I should stop doing this but ... fuck.
woke up at 6 30 and again dozed off till 7 . It is really becoming a daily thing. If I don't change my morning there is no way my whole day will go productive. Then at nearly 7 15 after brushing I go to study Ahem to watch mobile or insta this how not to complete your daily goals. I really am messing up all my routes shit I am fucking tired of myself.
Still it wasn't enough I ended up wasting 3 more hours in insta did not complete a single class. Then the charge ended but this fucking loser took other phone for classes and again wasted his time on YouTube. Really I don't get why am I not serious? determined? just why? I am getting everything wrong still getting fucked everytime.
Really it is frustrating
I want to cry
I feel depressed
backlogs are not getting completed
eyesight getting worse day by day
not remembering my notes
no revision
no studying
unable to attend class
cheating in tests
just why am I doing this
can't I get things straight
agh this is fucked up
atleast woke up today at 4 pm and completed yesterday's half class and chemistry half class then I lost myself.
Really why am I such a sore loser
I act like shit look down on others as I am better than other make up delusions my myself it's frustrating I can't understand myself why am I like this why am I not trying change just why the fuck
I have nothing in myself to rely on no good looks far from looks I am on the ugly side I think I am special just because sometimes things workout why can't I seem to understand things will not workout this time just why fucking die die die ahh fuck I know I am writing for sympathy but i really really want sympathy