Scarlet could not stop thinking about Melanie the whole time she was in class. She doesn't even know who is hurting more between the both of them. It was like she has shut out everyone and she now does things alone. She doesn't even look at her anymore.
Scarlet was beginning to feel that Melanie was right about her words. It was always about her, Scarlet, all the time. Sometimes, it makes her wonder if Melanie's life was that perfect without any flaws, but it turns out that she just chose to live it perfectly. But she on the other hand is always in need of someone to lean on, someone who will listen to all her worries and give her that relief talk.
It must be what Melanie needed at the moment, she thought as her eyes stared longer at her back from where she sat.
After class that day, Scarlet followed Melanie as soon as she saw her leaving and she caught up with her at the field center.
"Mel?" she called, her voice filled with emotions and sounding slightly hurt.
Melanie stopped walking, as if frozen on a spot, and she slowly turned around, the wind slightly wavering her hair.
Scarlet could see the expression on her face. She looks hurt, and she seem to have been crying. Scarlet wanted to give her the comfort she needed but as she made to take a step, Melanie moved back.
"Melanie," Scarlet called in a grave voice and she let out a soft sigh. She is even more worried about her now than before because she has never seen her in the state she is right now.
Seeing how she seem to be avoiding her and not wanting to be anywhere close to her, Scarlet felt abandoned, but she does not know what Melanie must be feeling at the moment. Did she hurt her that much?
"Is this it?" Scarlet forced herself to ask. "Is this the moment where we both know it's over but we can't bring ourselves to say it?" she asked but Melanie only stood there, staring at her. "I can't believe it's really going to be over because of an issue you were not clear about," Scarlet continued. "You could have asked. I would never steal anything from you. I just feel bad that I didn't realize sooner that I must have been a burden to you. Maybe it's because I consider you as a true friend, but even at that, you could have told me to stop."
She expected some kind of response from her and when she saw that she made no attempt to say anything, she gave a nod and said, "I'm not asking that we should go back to how we once were. I know our lives have been hard and there seem to be no end to it, even now…" she trailed off and paused when she realized she was about to start talking about herself. "I just want to wish you a good life, Mel," she said and blinked back the sorrow she felt as she said that. "Always be cheerful. Be that girl again, the one who is always full of smiles. Even though I know I might not get the chance to be this close to you again, I'll still watch you from afar. I—"
Melanie suddenly burst into tears, making Scarlet stop and she hiccupped very hard while trying to stop it.
"You still think this is about you?" she asked as tears poured down her eyes and her lashes became wet, sticking together. "I don't feel sorry for what I said to you. You deserved it. All these years of being together with you, did you ever care about me? Have you for once asked me what I really wanted? You just changed all of a sudden. You did things that are only convenient for you and I was left out. There are lots of things you didn't pay attention to, even when it was about Johan," she said. "I liked him first and you know it, because I told you. Then you got into an accident and I was like a stranger to you, like I never existed. I was by your side all the time, and you changed every second. This isn't even about Johan or Damien anymore. This is about me, about my life. I have been pushing too hard and it's beginning to choke me. I just want to stop. I can no longer go on with pretending to be who I am not. And it's not me you should be wishing a good life, it is yourself."
Scarlet hurtfully watched her leave, unable to do or say anything. There was nothing she could say, especially after everything she just laid down. For all she knows, Melanie never mentioned anything about liking Johan to her. If she had said it, she would never have crossed the line, but then, why didn't she stop her? Was it because she was feeling pity for her? Did she start to lose her memory for real after the accident?
It was not as if Scarlet did not know that there are some things she doesn't remember anymore but she just thought she was being forgetful and with the help of her diary, she always pens down things she never wants to forget, if at all she loses her memory of them. The diary's main purpose was to help her hold those memories so she can go back to them any time she wants.
Then you got into an accident and I was like a stranger to you…
Scarlet reflected on Melanie's words as she stood there. She tried to remember what she and Melanie was like before the accident, but even as hard as she tried, she can't seem to remember anything about them.
Then…how did I know Melanie? She asked herself. This was a question she was scared to find out. At the moment, she felt like she had really changed, like she was not the Scarlet everyone knew and she could not help but wonder if another soul had taken up her body, but it all did not make any actual sense to her.
After school that day, Scarlet walked down the lonely route home, hoping to find all the answers she need once she opens her diary to the very first page. It was even funny that she did not remember the very first thing she wrote. What could have been so precious to her that she would have written on the first page? Whatever it was, she thought, it would give her a hint on what she was looking for.
Scarlet began to develop a strange feeling all of a sudden and her feet began to slow down. She clutched the strap of her bag and she slightly turned her head to the side and in a reflex, she didn't know when she took her bag off her shoulder and flung it hard across the face of someone, making him crash to the ground and groaning.
Scarlet's eyes widen at the sudden reaction her body gave and she snapped out of it to now see a boy twice her size, down and holding the side of his face which must have been bruised because she perceived the smell of blood. Behind him was two other boys and from their dressing, she saw that they were students from her school.
Not knowing what to do, she let her bag down and rubbed her hands together, looking from the boy to the other two and then back at him again.
"Are you okay?" she asked, sounding concerned. "I'm sorry but I didn't know someone was behind me," she said, trying to sound more normal. Of course, it was not like she knew someone was coming from behind her but the manner at which she suddenly swung her bag backwards was even more suspicious.
The boy on the ground looked up at her, fury in his eyes and he spat on the side of the road before standing to his feet and facing her one-on-one.
Scarlet had a weird feeling about this. From what she could see, it doesn't seem she had hit them by mistake. It seems she had actually protected herself from what they might have done to her without her knowledge and she slowly moved her feet backwards, knowing she had now provoked them.
"Are you apologizing now after hitting me twice?" the huge boy said, his voice sounding very deep and intimidating.
"I only hit you once, and that was a mistake which I already apologized for," she said and added, "And by the way, you shouldn't be sneaking up behind someone. You never know what could happen."
The boy, a bit tall, glared down at her as if she were an insect and he said, "You crazy bitch! Do you think I haven't been trying to get back at you after that day you hit me without apologizing?"
Scarlet tried to think of any possibility of ever seeing a face like his somewhere or hitting him by mistake but she got none and she wondered if it has something to do with her losing her memory. Thinking about that again, she knew she needed to somehow convince these boys by talking them out of it so she can quickly get home and find answers to what she was looking for.
"Listen, I don't know who you are and I already apologized for hitting you. If it is revenge you are trying to get on me, trust me, you really don't want to mess with me."
Scarlet said that because she was beginning to have the same feeling like the one she had back at school earlier while she was hiding in the restroom. She already pictured how she can deal with the three boys if they ever try to do anything to infuriate her and she could feel her body reacting to what she has no idea of. It was like a kind of energy coursing through her, slowly.
"I really want to see what you can do all by yourself. You stand no chance against us three. It would be fun to see you begging me to spare your life," he said and grinned with an evil smile.
"Don't try—Ah!" Scarlet let out a short scream as she was being kicked hard to the ground, making her bruise her skin and when she raised her head up, she saw the three boys approaching her.
The huge boy pressed her hand to the ground with his shoe as she made to get up and she could hear the other two laughing as she was writhing in pain. As they were busy jeering at her and having their fun, Scarlet became enraged and all of a sudden, she felt a new kind of strength overcome her, coursing through her wrists and up into her shoulders.
The boy suddenly stopped laughing when he noticed something was off and he looked down to see Scarlet holding his leg down with a kind of force that cannot be explained. He let out a scream when her nails dug into his skin from the trouser he wore and he could feel it going into his bone.
Scarlet did not know what she was doing anymore. It was as if a new being had entered her and is now controlling what she does and no matter what, she cannot stop it. Looking up at the terrified expression of the boy, she said in a more deeper voice, "I told you, you don't want to mess with me."
Without waiting for a reaction, she raised his leg up and threw him in the air, sending him flying backwards and crashing into his friends. Scarlet stood to her feet and she could feel another wave of energy spreading through her body. Her senses were telling her to fight these boys and leave them in a brutal state, and there was something more than that. She could perceive the smell of blood and she could feel every part of her body craving for it.
It didn't make any sense and Scarlet willed herself to stop, but it was more powerful than her and she saw herself moving closer to where the boys now stood, watching her. She could smell the fear in the air and she could see the boy limping backwards. Her eyes were fixed on his right leg, which she had somehow injured and where she could clearly see the red blood.
The other two charged at her and she caught their hands mid-air before it would descend on her. She twisted the arm of the first one backwards at a right angle, snapping his arm and wrist into two, giving him an internal injury and he fell on his knees, screaming in agony as he held his broken arm. She looked at the second who was now more scared than ever and she gripped his hand tightly, squeezing it and crushing the bones. His screams filled her ear and she found it rather disturbing and the next thing she did was to hit him on the side of the neck, making him unconscious.
Scarlet moved her eyes back to the boy and from the corner of her eyes, she could see his other friend scrambling away. She felt she hasn't had enough and wanted to deal more with them but something else was getting in her way at the same time.
From where she stood, she suddenly had a crystal-clear vision and saw her eyes zooming into the neck of the boy. It was like the time when she was with her mother and everything around her suddenly turned silent. The only thing she could hear and concentrate on was the veins pulsing in each and her teeth began to ache badly.
Her feet moved towards the boy who was trying to retreat from her after seeing the unimaginable thing she was capable of doing and all she wanted was to bite into his neck.
A part of her wanted to stop so badly because she knew it was not right and it didn't make any sense but she can't seem to control it so she pushed her head back and let out a loud shriek which echoed off, scaring the boys and even her at the same time.
The rage she felt was beginning to subside as she had somehow managed to overcome it and it was then she knew that something frightening had unleashed in her, something that was about to take a new turn in her life.