Cough cough.
Argh my throat is so painful.
My lungs feel to painful to breathe.
I feel so fucking cold.
Why does my head feel so heavy and full?
Ah, why am I feeling like I will die?
I tried to open my eyes but my head almost slit open. It's like the worst type of hangover. I was having a hard time listening to my surrounding. All I could hear was that annoying ringing in my ear. What the fucking hell right now? I couldn't even control my hands or even my own body, it felt too tiring and cold. Even with just the thought of talking , I felt pain in my throat.
"..... happened?"
I heard an unfamiliar voice. I tried again to open my eyes but the sudden bright lights discouraged me as my head finally felt like splitting open. I groaned as I brought my hand to massage my temple. Even my hands felt cold, like wet cold. I squinted my eyes open, adapting to the brightness gradually.
I finally felt something that wasn't painful, my face felt ticklish. When I fully opened my eyes, I saw a blondie hovering over me, their hair tickling my face. Surprised, I slapped the face away. I immediately regretted it as I felt as if it was the last bit of energy in me. I coughed still, like a TB cough. My cough was also wet.
On realising my head was laying on someone's lap, I shot up. I tried to ignore the series of pain from every inch of my body, including my full-feeling head.
"Excuse you!" I exclaimed, my voice hoarser than the name horse. I immediately coughed wave two again and it was getting painful for my lungs. It really ached to cough..... or even to speak.
Where am I?
What am I doing here?
I was clearly.....
"Fuck," I whispered, ignoring the pain in my throat. "I clearly...." I trailed off, my hands going to my throat that I had mercilessly stabbed. How am I not dead? I clearly stabbed myself right?
*You will regret ever trying to seduce such figures*
Huh? Who said that?
*She is really ugly, what are those on her face? Are you sure that's not a curse?*
What are these? What the hell is happening? Curse? What? My shaky and cold hands slowly went for my face. I felt for my face and felt an unfamiliar roughness.
*That's why she lives in a veil, no one can look at her without feeling disgust crawl up their skin*
I closed my eyes, these memories are not mine but they came at a price. That is, my piece of mind. I could feel another wave of pain hitting me, specifically my head and brain. What are these memories? Forget these memories, why am I even here? Where am I? Hell?
"Are you okay?" I finally noticed a presence. The blondie again. And I really wished they didn't talk, because their choice echoed into my brain painfully.
I sucked in a breath sharply, suddenly so annoyed that I couldn't control myself.
"What am I doing here? You! What were you doing with me?" I snapped in a low tone, for my own good. My throat felt parched and my lungs feel painful with every word I say.
My blurry vision didn't allow me to see the face. Silence. "Just get lost, or if you are here to finish me off then do it quickly," I add. It's not as if I didn't try to end myself either. I fucking stabbed myself in the throat.
"Astoria?" it was man's voice. I could finally tell the voice color, the Blondie had been a man with a bad hair cut. Who told him to grow hair? It's even taller than mine. And what did he just call me?
*Astoria*
*Astoria*
*Astoria*
*Answer me Astoria*
*Get out Astoria*
*You are so ugly Astoria*
*Astoria, what are you doing*
*Astoria you are disgusting*
*No face and no shame. What really are you Astoria*
Those were all different people, unfamiliar yet very familiar faces. All looking displeased. A very strong wave of pain spilt my brain into micro pieces. It was really overwhelming that I had to bury my exploding head in my thighs. I was biting down pain and the want to yell.
"Astoria?" the blonde called out. His voice added to my misery as it echoed in my full head.
"Shut the fuck up already!" I hissed, not looking up. I was blinking away my tears that were caused by pain and discomfort. A whimper escaped my lips as I finally let myself lie on the cold hard ground as I attempted to heal whatever the fuck that had been happening to my head.
*You are and always be the daughter of a prostitute!*
"Shut it!" I yelled in a crying pained voice, trying to stop whatever that was happening to me.
*And ugly*
*You ruin everything*
What were these memories? These obviously aren't mine. I am no Astoria, am Hollie! But why does it look like these are my memories? Fuck! Why are they so painful!
I felt myself being pulled in a tight warm embrace. I stayed in it for a while as I yelled and whimpered before detaching myself. I looked up at the blonde, finally my vision was clear.
"Stay away from me Calix Barriston!"
What did I just call him?
"Why the fuck do I know your name?! Who are you?!"
*Stay away from Calix, he is mine, understand? You are too ugly for him. Just do this one right!*
*My son is going to be someone important so I advice you stay away from him*
*Without that veil Calix wouldn't even spare you a glance*
Calix Barriston, my love interest.....?
I lied down on the ground, my face buried away as I tried to swallow the pain that was slowly getting less worse. Calix, Calix.
I never knew anyone with such a name. And I am not Astoria. My mom never went by the term prostitute.
I finally sat up. Unconsciously without even noticing, I found myself hiding my face in my hands. I hid my face with my hands out of the blue. Why? I honestly have no idea .
"Here," Calix, or whatever the thing next to me, piped in encouragingly, handing me my veil which I never knew I had, his smile was really cute and satisfying. I took it and put it on immediately. I quickly scanned his features, he is handsome, I find him that.
But he looks too innocent and still unaware of the ugly reality of life to be my type.
I could feel his eyes scanning me as I stood up. I swallowed a huge lump when a wave of sickness hit me yet again. "Am sorry am late," he says in a low tone, as if embarrassed of himself. I look up at him and then around. And for once I notice we were at a lake. His wear was weird. Looking down at my own, I have no words to criticize his.
"Don't you remember me?" his tone was gentle as he closed the gap between us. I immediately created a gap between us and looked at him, only in time to see the hurt and worry in his blue eyes.
Why the fuck would I remember you? Who are you? An angel? The president's son?
I, or Astoria was thrown in this very Lake because of a guy named Calix. He is the Arch Duke's son, and he was interested in her.... Me? I could see some moments of 'us' together. How could that be? I am not Astoria.
Am I going crazy?
"Am I supposed to?" I ask. Of course I remember him even though I had never met him. His expression looked like that one of a broken person. He walked closer to me, pointing at his face.
"Try to remember please, look at me," he sounded like he was pleading. Wasn't it said he didn't know if she was ugly? He just clearly saw her face without a veil right?
Wait, am I supposed to love him?
What am I even thinking? This must be some hallucination, I clearly died! So what is happening right now? Am I really Astoria? It doesn't look like I am dreaming though, the pain am feeling is too real.
Did I transmigrate? Is that shit even real?
"My head really hurts if I think," I admitted. His hurt looked morphed into worry. He pulled me into a hug, which I didn't break this time. But I didn't move a muscle either. He kissed my head and hugged me closer.
Of course I didn't give the hug a hoot. I was not Astoria who was in love with him. I was thinking about me, not as Hollie but as Astoria.
A prostitute's child with the Count, whatever that is. Apparently it is a title. Count Edgar Lannister and Shireen gave birth to her-me. My mother Shireen died, killed as I suspect, a year ago. I had never experienced what love is since her demise?
Astoria had two sisters, one is the second beauty of the Kingdom.
Kingdom? How much cringier could this get?
The other one is just so so. Nothing to look at. Atleast she wasn't a ugly like their youngest sister, Astoria. The Countess was just ordinary in her looks, that's where the oldest girl child, Sena got her looks. Count Edgar is a real handsomeness in its title, that's where the younger one, Verbena got her beauty. What's more, their oldest brother, Espen was also not bad looking, looking fifty percent Countess Marcella, and the other fifty Count Edgar.
Just that, they were all from the same mother except Astoria who was from a prostitute. Even their only son being useless, she was still the one who was more useless in their eyes.
Astoria wasn't so easy to bully is she had advantages, one, she wasn't even educated, two, she was not allowed to learn things and thirdly, she had an ugly title on her back, the prostitute's daughter.
Astoria lived a life not worthy one of a dog but she never gave up. She didn't give up when she was bullied for her face, she didn't give up when her mother was turned into the Countess' personal maid and she didn't give up when her mother died. She even knew her death was staged.
But it just happened that Calix had always followed her around, bringing her sister Verbena to attempt her murder. It was murder actually, coz in reality Astoria died.
Everyone transmigrated as a princess or something but look at me. A really sore sight I transmigrated into.