I kept roaming from this corner to that corner, but no one came. It had already been two hours since I took a bath, and the maids left, saying he would come, but no one came.
I didn't know how long it had been since the sun was going to rise above my head, but the disappointment running down my spine was something else.
"Where is he?"
"How long will he take?"
I thought and tried to sneak out of the room, but it was all dark. The entire corridor was empty, as if there was no one in this mansion but me. I was getting scared, but I was not as well. As if I'm not scared, but feeling too empty. At least I never had this feeling in my place.
I continued walking in the corridor, but I heard no noise. I didn't even know which room was the duke's room. I ended up returning to my room when I realized my tears were already pouring, touching my cheeks. As I felt my cheek wet, I realized it made me cry even more. I had no idea when it will start. I had no idea when my heart started aching even more, making me so freaking regretful.
Why is he not coming?
Was it just a business marrying me?
Does he think that I got married to him for this reason?
If not, why is he doing this to me? Is he not aware of how people think when the husband doesn't enter the bridal chamber for the first night? Or is he doing this knowing everything? Why? Why?
I screamed, but my cry didn't stop. I started throwing every single ornament I was wearing. I didn't care where they ended up falling, but I didn't care. I felt like tearing myself apart. These feelings kept on going through my entire body, making me feel even shittier than I was.
I had been crying for an hour now, but I saw no one coming to my room. It felt so worthless bawling my eyes out like this, but still, I was behaving like a kid who was heartbroken because of luck. Why? Why? Come to your fucking senses, you asshole Bernice Balliol. You are a Balliol. How could you cry like this? Didn't you see how your father behaved? Didn't you see how there was no sign of sadness when your family was about to become commoners? Then why the hell are you crying like a fool because of a guy who is nothing but your... Husband.
Ah, I cried again.
I had no idea when I stopped crying, but before I could know, when I opened my eyes, I saw the sun already falling on my face, making me feel even more awake than last night. With that, I even heard a knock on the door.
"Madam, may I come in?" It was Yuna's voice.
"No," I rejected.
"Madam, the Duke already arrived for breakfast. That is what I came here to ask," she said, making my blood boil to the extent I wanted to hold her neck and hit her face against a wall until she begs me to leave. I wanted to see the face where her blood kept on dripping on the floor, but I stopped my thought before it roamed further.
"Tell them I'm coming," I said.
I got ready on my own and walked toward the hall after an hour. But as I was walking in the corridor, it didn't seem like it was last night. Guards were stationed in each corner. Maids were already doing their work, unlike how it was looking so lonely and dark, as if even the ghosts would be scared of this place. It looked nothing more like an abandoned palace.
"Morning, madam," he said.
I wanted to laugh out loud, but I didn't.
"Morning," I said. I didn't even call him anything, just 'in the morning,' as if we had no relationship, which he proved last night.
"How's your first day here?" he asked.
"Ah, the first day? It was normal," I answered.
"Any discomfort?" he asked.
Discomfort? Huh! It was coming from someone who made me feel the shittiest way when no one ever treated me like this.
"It was okay," I ignored his main question.
I kept on seeing his lips while his eyes were looking at his food. I could feel he wanted to ask another question, but then I saw someone come holding letters in his hands.
"I apologize for coming here all of a sudden, but the letter was said to be delivered instantly, so I came here," it was the Duke's assistant.
He was about to give the letters to the Duke when I saw the mark from my mansion.
"They are for me," I spoke.
"Thanks for bringing them here," I said and got up from the table.
"But I think it is-"
The assistant tried to say, but I cut him off.
"Do you think I won't know how my father sends things? Or do I have to give you an explanation for this?" I was getting pissed seeing him questioning me, but I couldn't even get angry, or my father would come right here and scold me for this behavior.
"Okay, madam. I understand," he nodded and left.
I did leave the food in the middle while the Duke was still having it. I think he doesn't even care. After all, he is the one who treated me like a fool last night.
"Madam, you haven't touched the food," Yuna said. But I wonder why she is being all affectionate tonight when she was acting all modified when I met her yesterday. Or am I just hallucinating again?
"You can have the rest," I smiled and walked toward my room.
I felt my feet in pain, which again reminded me of what I did last night. Last night, I pulled out the anklet I was wearing by force, which made me bleed, but I forgot.