Have you ever come across the feeling where you wanted to show your emotions to others, comfort them in their difficult situations. But you just don't know what and how to do it, in fact you feel weird when people weeping, crying or getting upset repeatedly over a loss, when what they can actually do is to find a solution to make the situation better.
Some of you might be thinking being not emotional or being practical is not good but is it really true? Should all of us be same, who should know how to be emotional or able to show our concern to others?
....
Hearing a loud voice I wake up with a jolt and I try to settle myself on the bed by giving myself a minute or two. Though, before I could do so I hear multiple loud voices coming from outside so, without thinking about anything I come out from my room hurriedly then I walk towards the Aunt's room from where I am hearing loud voice of father, mother and brother.
I enter inside the room got a bit surprised seeing the scene in front of me, Aunt laying on the floor with blood around her head and nose is bleeding. Other then this father is running here there trying to clean that blood and stop the bleeding on the other hand bro is trying to help him but mom and granny are weeping. Seeing these two ladies like this, my mind speak up..
Mind: Now what is the need of all this weeping and crying, someone is hurt, blood is oozing out but rather than helping father to clean it they are being a cry mess.
Me: Exactly bro, they like to do drama.
Mind: Yeah I know.
Father: Siya!!
Me: (Coming back to reality) Yea.. Yeah
Father: Go and get ready, me, you and your brother are going to hospital and taking your Aunt, as probably she will be needing some stitches in the nose plus ex-ray will be needed too.
Siya: Okay.
Mind: Finally someone speak up practically.
Hurriedly I walk inside my room and start wearing casual clothes in hurry. In less then five minutes I again left the room, run towards the main door of the house to open it once its done I pick up the car keys then open the car door too. Meanwhile father and brother come from behind too, carrying Aunt with them.
Father: Siya! go and sit on the back seat from the left side, this way aunt head will be on your lap.
Me: Okay.
Silently, I do what he asked me to do. Once I got settled in the car they carefully make aunt lay on the seat in a way that her head got in my lap, soon they both settled down in the car and father start driving the car. During the whole drive, aunt keep writhing in pain and I don't know what to say or do or how to do it so, I could calm her down.
However, to my surprise I hear those comforting words coming from my father's voice and it is quite new because I have never heard comforting words from him. To me he is someone who is more authoritative, disciplined, practical but hearing something emotional from his side is something surprising plus strange.
It took us around thirty minutes to reach the hospital, the moment our car parked then a stretcher come by and two ward boys together carefully took Aunt out. They rushed her inside the hospital, me and father also followed them inside while brother drive the car towards the basement parking. One of the emergency doctor, two nurses start the treatment and father goes towards the reception to perform the paper work plus completing other hospital formalities.
As I was sitting their I keep on observing people crying for the suffering or loss of their loved/dear ones, random thought keep popping in my head...
why to cry so much? Whatever was going to happen has already happened, now what will happen if you cry or feel sad like this? One should be practical enough to think the solution of the problem in such situations, one should learn how to let go things or move on.
man, how come people have to cry so much and remain sad. I mean look at me, my aunt is still undergoing treatment or even that much blood came out but I am not crying or sad.
by the way, is it wrong for me to be not emotional? Am I wrong not to cry or not to be sad?
However, soon my trance break hearing father's voice...
Father: Siya! Come we are going towards MRI section.
Me: Okay.
After two hours or so when all of the testing got completed, hospital formalities completed we and stiches done we leave the hospital premises. During this time of journey, Aunt remain in drowsy state probably because of medicines and enjoying the moment of silence we reached home back.
Together, brother and father give a little bit support to Aunt and help her in settling down in her room. As soon as she got settled down on the bed, granny come inside the room with moist eyes and worried face. She directly walk towards her bed, sit on the side of the bed and softly ruffle her hair.
Seeing this, we just move out of the room giving them privacy, both of them walk back in their rooms but I started walking towards the kitchen to meet mother. On reaching at door of the kitchen, I clear my throat to gain her attention...
Me: (Cheerfully) I am back.
Mother: (Stop working and look at me) What happened in the hospital, how is Aunt doing?
Me: Lab testing done, nothing serious she just got some stiches on her nose for future medicines prescribed.
Mother: Okay cool. By the way Vihaa will be meeting you in the park after ten minutes so, go and fresh up.
Me: Okay.
And I start walking back towards my room so, I could start getting fresh. As I reach inside my room I close the door, directly walk inside the washroom start washing my face and hand with soap. After drying my face and hand I walk back to my wardrobe then I pick up fresh clothes for me, start wearing a tracks. Once I finished getting ready I pick up my phone, leave the room then walk towards the main door of the house.
The moment I step outside the house, I found her waving at me excitedly. I smiled back brightly, then like as usual we walk towards the park and sit on the benches. As soon as we got settled down we speak up at the same time...
Me/Vihaa: I/How...
Vihaa: You speak first
Me: No you speak.
Vihaa: No you are small, you are going to speak up first.
Me: Okay. I will like to know, is being not emotional is fine?
Vihaa: What do you mean?
After this I explained things happened few hours back with aunt, what I observe during that time and my thoughts that randomly pop up in my head during that time. Once the explanation got over I again ask her the same question...
Me: So, tell me is being not emotional is fine?
Vihaa: Kiddo, being emotional or not is not the matter here. It just that sometimes we don't feel connected, with someone and that's why we don't feel emotional for them. Its completely fine, not to be like this. Don't worry.
Me: Okay. What were you saying?
Vihaa: I was asking about your day only.
Me: (Rubbing my nape) Ohh okay.
After this we start walking in the park talking about some big and small issues of our lives, after spending almost an hour talking, walking we walk back towards our houses. After reaching house, I directly walk towards the dining area so, I could eat dinner early. Luckily, dinner was ready so, without thinking about anything or speaking to someone else I serve food on my plate then start eating. Soon mother father and brother also come and start eating the food.
As soon as I finish eating food, I walk inside the kitchen and clean my plate. After that picking up a water bottle for me, I walk towards my room but before I step inside my room, I thought to peep inside her room to know what is she doing plus how is she doing?
I walk close to her room, I stand in front of door then I realised it is open a bit so, I just open it a little bit more and try to look what is she doing. I found her laying there on the bed, getting satisfied I closed the door a bit and then walk inside my room. After closing and locking my door, I sit down on my bed with eclipse novel in my hand.
And my night pass just like this, reading for sometime and then I fall asleep in my room itself, anware of the chaos that will be there to say....
GOOD MORNING...