" Hello Lily," He says somberly, and I am at a loss for words. I don't know what to say. I knew he would find me eventually. There aren't that many places to hide.
He pulls me into a hug, kisses my head, and takes a deep shuddering breath.
And I let myself go, sink into his arms, and relish that long-lost feeling of warmth. He felt and smelled like home. I've been agonising for so long over what he will do or say when we will see each other again. I realise that I feel tired, and exhausted. I feel the muscles of his jaw clench and unclench against my temple but I don't dare to pull away. I'm afraid of what I'll see in his eyes. I ran away. When things got hard I ran away. It was the harsh truth. And I have a feeling he won't take it lightly.
It had been nipping at my legs for some time now. It has finally caught up to me and bit me in the ass.
He slowly pulls away, takes my hand in his, and drags me towards the steps before I have a chance to have a look at him. He is upset. No, angry.
" I thought it was for the best," I begin softly, but Mason says nothing and keeps trekking at a fast pace towards the stairs that lead to Ghedi market.
" They want me, not you. I knew if I wasn't there you'd be safe. Enid would be safe. Laira, David, Ellie and everyone else," I push on, but he says nothing still as we make it to the market.
I yank my hand out of his grip, he finally stops and turns to me, angered. I find that he is terrifying. I've never seen him angry.
" I thought you were dead," He shouts, his voice cracks. He is distraught, and I can understand how he feels. I'm not exactly innocent.
" I looked for you for months and when I couldn't find you I mourned you and buried you, and I died with you," His voice softens a little, and runs both hands over his face, tilts his head back to look at the cupola covering the market. He is heartbroken, and I have no clue what to say to make it better.
" Imagine my surprise when Shay showed up in our kitchen and brought me here," I look at his clothes and I see he is wearing his usual house clothes. A pair of loose trousers and a t-shirt.
Shay is awake. I'm relieved.
" I know you are angry, but I am alive," I begin apologetically and he scoffs. I try to smile but he doesn't seem all that impressed.
" Angry doesn't even begin to cover how I feel," He croaks with an edge of desperation.
" Why? Jesus. Fucking. Christ," He begins to pace in the market, and all I can do is watch him stomp his feet like an enraged bull.
" I thought it was for the best," I reiterate my earlier words. That gives him pause for a fraction of a second.
" I heard you the first time you said it, but somehow it doesn't make me feel any better Lily," He seethes and I have no idea how to deal with this Mason. He looks like he is about to strangle me or lock me in a dungeon.
" I'm sorry. I made a decision. If I wasn't with you then you wouldn't have to deal with it. I saw what they did. If I'd stayed it would have been ten times worse. Micah won't stop. You said yourself," I argue. He knows that is the truth. I don't give him time to respond and begin to move.
" I need to go back to the house. Denmar and Nareen are probably waiting for me," I say softly and move past him. He trails behind me and we fall into a step.
I don't know what to say, and nor does he by the looks of it. In hindsight, I could've told him that I was alive, but I knew he would come for me. And trouble would follow. As it always does. How did I end up in this mess?
" Did you really bury me?" I break the silence, but he remains quiet.
" No. It was a figure of speech," He grumbles under his breath after a little while and once again we fall silent.
Understandable that he doesn't feel like speaking to me. We walk in silence and I find that taking the land route takes much longer to get to Denmar's house. Never tried it before.
Denmar and Nareen are waiting for me along with- surprise, surprise,- none, other than Graham who is cuddling Shay like he is a long-lost lover.
" You look well for someone dead," He gives me a toothy smile, while Mason goes straight for the stairs leading to the roof.
" Thanks," I shrug while Denmar studies the armour suit I'm wearing with a curious eye. She says something to Nareen and they both take a seat at the table. This ought to be fun.
" So," Graham sighs and looks around the cramped house," This is what you've been up to," He clicks his tongue and turns his gaze to me once more," You know you left me to clean up your mess," I know what he is referring to and don't really know how to respond to that.
" I thought it for the best," I sound like a broken record, but it is the truth to some extent.
Graham nods and finally places Shay on the floor. Shay wads towards me shaking his tail, and I lower myself to greet him.
Nuzzling my neck, I lean in to hug him and take a good whiff of his scent. He smells like the sky after a heavy rain. And I love the scent of rain.
" I get how he feels," Graham begins as I pull away from Shay who settles to lick a wound on my hand. I stay quiet.
" When I thought that Shay died, I didn't know what to do with myself and Mason shared my grief. And I, his. He mourned you, Lily," Guilt creeps up on me faster than I expected and quickly becomes heavier than the armour I'm wearing. I didn't want to hurt Mason.
" It almost killed him, " Graham sighs and I stand. At this point, apologies won't atone for the grief I've put both of them through. I selfishly kept Shay with me, knowing what would happen. I'm a terrible, terrible person.
" For what is worth. I'm sorry, " I take a step forward but Graham takes a step back and raises his hands to stop me.
" It's not me you should apologise Lily. You kept Shay safe, and I'm happy that he is alive and well. But," Graham puffs out a breath, and scrubs his face," He loves you, you know," Mason never said it, but I never did either. A year ago, I was a different person. Perhaps it was time, to settle the account.
" I know," I say quietly, and look up the steps that lead to the roof. I hope that he will forgive me. I hope that we can find a way to see things through.