Bruno
I'm in so much fucking pain. Physical torture would be preferable to this reality.
From the comfort of my car, I spot Miles Moretti kissing Lina goodbye.
My Lina.
I'm so angry right now, I could burst a vessel. If Moretti were a little closer, I'd fucking beat him to death. Right now, the only thing that's standing between him and a grave is Lina. I have a feeling that she'd rather our reunion not involve me bathing in the blood of her soon-to-be-ex. He was the worst part of the file I had Chase prepare on the twenty-four-year-old Lina.
He and I will totally chat soon though...
I look at the half-empty bottle of whisky in my other seat longingly. I manage to stop myself from finishing it. I'd decided to stop drinking five days ago. It was a tough decision since it had been the only thing that eased away the pain since I gained consciousness. In the end, I decided to stop drinking myself to death and finally deal with things.
'Whatever are you thinking, precious?' I wonder as Lina stops a few strides from her car to survey her surroundings. Does she suspect that she's being watched?
I think that's possible. She's always had such great instincts. It's one of the things I love about her. It's too bad that she's about to think her instincts failed her-she won't see anything out of the ordinary. My white Benz easily blends in around here. As I predicted, she shakes her head, probably thinking she's crazy, and continues striding toward her Ford.
It's agony, seeing her like this and not being able to talk to her to get some answers. And get her back. It's driving me insane. My hands form fists and my body starts trembling uncontrollably. The pain is worse than anything I've ever felt.
I then start telling myself to take a deep breath. There is a time and place for everything. Now is definitely not the time for us to meet -I'm bristling with anger and not in control of myself. If I talk to my precious now I might explode and start saying things I don't mean, messing up things in the process. I'm so fucking furious right now and some of that fury is directed at her. I need to sort out my feelings about this situation that's causing me so much agony and her role in it. That's what I'm thinking as she pulls away from the parking lot and into the direction of her home. I follow her but it's not to watch her this time. I've actually purchased a house that's not too far from hers.
While I'm driving my phone starts ringing for what seems like the zillionth time. Cursing viciously, I stop the car to see who the caller is. It's Gia's call. Again. I reject the call and I contemplate switching my phone off. I've had enough of her. Leo too. I have a dozen missed calls from him as well. ( I'm more than a little angry with them and I'm not getting them off that easy- they can keep calling and I won't answer). Silence, in this case, is the best revenge. My siblings just loathe it when I'm mad at them. I love them and will always do what but right now I prefer not to hear from their deceitful little selves. As I've always counted them as one of the few individuals I trusted in this world, I'm more than a little pissed with them for what they've kept from me.
After I woke up in that hospital in Botswana, I'd had Chase make arrangements for our immediate departure to Mylari. The first thing I did was go to my parent's house where they happened to be having their family dinner. There was a long and ugly confrontation but the bottom line is that they confirmed what I knew: They had deceived me and took advantage of my memory loss to rid my life of Lina, just like my parents always wanted. My brother and sister could barely look at me. They knew that they'd betrayed me in the worst possible way by going along with my parents. They also knew that I might never be able to trust them again. It was a dinner none of us would soon forget...
My phone rings again. It's Chase this time but I still don't answer-I told him not to bother me after he sent me that report. Switching my phone off in frustration, I try to catch up with her. Once the Ford Fiesta is in my sight, all my thoughts once more turn to her.
Fuck, she's a good driver.
'I've made the right decision by not showing myself to her,' I think. 'I might have broken her.'
I grit my teeth. Even in my rage, I know I'd never hurt her. Not physically anyway. But she won't exactly be getting away scot-free either...
The thing is that I want Lina back, badly. And I'll destroy any motherfucker who stands in the way of that. However, it doesn't mean that I'm fine with the way she just seemed to move on to other men even though I still breathed on this earth. It makes me want to kill. How could she do that? Was it that easy to just move on from what we had? I understand that my parents made her leave but she was the one who chose not to come back. She didn't fight for me. Not once even though I'd have liked her to, it makes me wonder if she loved me at all.
I clench my fists at that thought.
I'll enjoy destroying the life she built without me. It might even be enough to soothe my rage. It's necessary, anyway, for the life we are going to have. Because, despite everything, I still intend to have her, whether or not she wants me. I just have to wait for the right moment to do that...
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