*Warning read with caution, a memory of sexual trauma is recalled in this chapter.*
With Brian busy doing the work for the club, I found myself working a little longer at the shop. I spent some time with my brother on Monday, but was shocked to meet Alyssa, his ex girlfriend from high school, was there as his nurse. Those two were so in love back then but she got into a Californian college and they ended things because she'd be so far away for a while. They stayed in touch until she met someone, who she ended up marrying, but I found out they divorced after two years because he cheated on her. Watching how she smiled and bantered with my brother like they were still love struck teenagers tugged at my heart. He's looking better and more energetic too.
So I spent some time with him yesterday too, but today I'm letting them enjoy dinner together. I worked on catching up on some of my work, finishing up the special order for my best customer. I felt good calling her up and letting her know it was ready for her final inspection. After closing up the shop and gallery since there was no classes tonight, I said good night to Art in the workshop, who was waiting on a piece in the kilns still.
I've thought about Brian and I's living situation and I think I want to bring up us moving in together, into my house. I feel bad staying at his place all the time, only buying groceries here and there. If he moves into my place, he'd be saving a lot of money and have more room for his office that has been overtaken by his brothers books. My four bedroom place is more than ample space for us. Plus, I do need to spend more time there and get rid of some of my parents stuff. I should bring it up and see what he thinks.
I send a text to Brian asking what he'd like for dinner and I'd bring it by the club. I didn't get a response after fifteen minutes, so I give him a call and still no answer. Curious, I drive through and just grab us each a sandwich from the deli and head to the club. Jack lets me in, but warns me, that Marc is inside too. He see's my hesitance and asks if I want Big daddy to escort me to Brian.
"No thanks, Jack. I appreciate the offer, but I can handle him if I have to." I enter the club, head high and scanning for Brian. Dass, the bartender I've seen a few times, is working the bar talking to someone near her feet. I go up to the bar to ask her about Brian, when Brian comes up, looking like he's been rolling around on the ground. He's smiling at her in a way I don't really like, but I stamp down my jealousy and set the sandwiches on bar.
"What happened to you?" I ask still slightly annoyed, making Brian jump around.
"Sarina! What do you mean?" Brian chuckles and takes a look at himself. "Oh, this. The sink was leaking so I've been underneath fixing it."
I nod, smiling stiffly, "Well, I brought something for dinner."
He smiles and comes around the bar, placing a kiss on my forehead, "Thank you, beautiful."
Just like that, my annoyance and jealousy flutter away with the butterflies that he stirs inside of me.
"No problem. Are you done here?" I ask hopeful, ready to clean him up and have him all to myself.
"Almost. I just need to stay for a little bit to make sure this doesn't leak again. However, we can go to our room while we wait, I can wash up and we can eat." He grabs the bag and my hand, nodding to Dass as we head to our room.
As we pass a room, I hear a familiar male groan of pleasure, accompanied by cries of pain and instantly become nauseous. A memory I would rather forget comes to my mind, of when Marc would make sure he came before he quit doing anal, even if I was in pain.
He had finally talked me into tying me up. He'd tied my hands to the head board and he'd done my ankles together, then tied them to the head board as well to where I was in a fetal position. It was fine at first until he slipped out and into my ass and kept going, even as I screamed, until he came in me. His excuse was, he didn't know... that he thought I was cumming and he was right there too. It was traumatizing making me feel sick and weak just remembering it.
My feet falter, Brian's grip on my hand though keeps me from losing my balance.
"Whoa, you okay babe?" Brian asks, startled but concerned.
I nod and point to our room, which Brian opens up and I rush in to the bathroom. I feel sick, and stand next to the toilet ready just in case.
"Sarina? Are you okay?" Brian knocks softly on the bathroom door, opening it a crack as I turn the faucet on.
"Yeah, I'm okay. I will be out in a minute." I force a smile on my lips as I wash my hands.
When I step out and he's setting our food out on the little table by the couch my stomach turns and I swallow hard.
Brian smiles at me, "Here you go babe. How was your day?" He looks me over and stands as his brows furrow in concern. "Sarina, you're sweating."
I wipe my brow and feel the cold sweat, "Oh I guess I am. I suddenly do feel a little sick to my stomach. I think my lunch is messing with me." I try to brush it off.
He purses his lips at me, shaking his head, "Okay, that's fine. Come sit down and sip your drink, see how you feel in a few minutes." He gives me a look that tells me, he sees through my lie, but isn't going to call me on it.
We sit down and after a few minutes I start telling him more about Alyssa and David, how they were having dinner tonight together. How well he was looking and that maybe we should talk to Alyssa about his last hurrah party too. I feel better after a little bit except for one thing.
That one thing being, I now feel guilty for lying to Brian.
"Brian?" I ask hesitantly.
He pauses chewing and swallows his bite. "Yes?" He sets his sandwich down and gives me his full attention.
I fiddle with my hands and worry how he's going to react to what I tell him.
His hands cover mine, making me raise my attention to his face, "Sarina, if you're not ready to tell me something, it's alright."
I shake my head, "I just heard Marc moan in the hall earlier and it made me sick to my stomach. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you it was my lunch getting to me."
"Is that all?" He asks, looking confused.
My head pulls back, making me hear the crackle of my stiff neck suddenly. "Yes. No? There was something else..." I fidget, awkwardly, but smile at him none the less.
"I was thinking maybe...."
*KNOCK-KNOCK*
"Hold that thought." He says, standing and going to answer the door. "Hey, is it leaking again?"
I turn my head and it's Dass. Of course it is... I let out a controlled breath as she informs Brian.
"Yes, it is. It's a light drip, so I have a bucket under it for now."
"Alright, I'll call a plumber tomorrow in the morning for it. Just put a note out for Scott and Simon to dump the bucket every so often, please. I'll make sure the plumbers call me for payment and leave the receipt here. Who's working tomorrow early shift? Scott or Simon?"
"Simon, I'll put that in the note too for him. Thanks Brian. Sorry for interrupting your dinner." Dass sends an apologetic smile my way and then at Brian before leaving.
Shifting in my seat, I take in another deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to regain my courage.
Brian joins me again, "So what were you thinking, sweetheart?"
I shrug, "I was thinking maybe you'd think about moving into my place? You'd have a room as your office, it's big enough for all your stuff, you could get rid of your storage shed and save money without having to pay rent."
He's sitting there silent, almost frozen. As the seconds tick by with no facial expression I become anxious, "It was just a thought. I just thought we're both paying on two different places but staying at one all the time and since mines big enough.... I don't know... I guess this was still too early for a suggestion like that.." I admit, disappointed, letting my head drop down and stare at my uneaten sandwich. I had no appetite now. I asked too soon.
Brian's hands come into my view, taking mine in his, and pulls me closer to him. "I'd like that very much. My lease is coming up for renew in a month anyways, so that gives us enough time to move and get things changed over to your address."
I smile, "Our address."
"Our address."