Kay babaeng tao
After eating my tuna sandwich at nakadalawang bote ng beer nakaramdam na agad ako ng matinding pagod. I turned off my phone again because it kept on ringing and it annoyed me already. I'll change my number soon.
"Ma'am, handa na po ang kwarto nyo." One of our staff said standing beside my chair. I smiled and nodded at her. I got up and followed her on my way to my room. "Nandun na ba lahat ng gamit ko?" I asked while we were walking. I got one of our most liked villa here. I have my own pool inside but nothing compares to the white sands and the beautiful sea. "Ah, yes ma'am." She replied when we got to my villa. She assisted me inside and arranged my things when she was done I thanked her and took a shower.
Once I was done I changed into some comfy clothes and layed in bed. My eyes started to tear up again when I remembered everything. I wanna call him so bad pero ayoko ng mag mukhang tanga. Kung pwede ko lang kalimotan lahat. I cried and cried till I fell into a deep sleep.
I woke up with the sound of knocking on my door. I groaned not wanting to get up. I should really put a do not disturb sign outside my door. I walked up to the door slowly and opened it still sleepy at ang mga mata ay namamaga parin.
"Ma'am, good evening po. Pasensya na po sa istorbo pero pinadalhan ka po ng pagkain ni Manang Elsa. Kanina pa po kita kinakatok pero walang sumasagot kaya bumalik nalang ako ngayon." The boy around 17 said with a tray of food in his hands.
"What time is it?" I asked leaning on the wall beside my door. "11 pm na po, ma'am. Ayaw kana sana gisingin ni manang pero nag aalala sya dahil tuna sandwich lang daw po ang kinain nyo kanina." He replied still holding the tray. Gutom ako pero wala talaga akong gana. "Ayaw kong kumain, eh. Sayo nalang yan." I replied and smiled at him. "Talaga po? Baka magalit si manang, eh." While the boy in front of me was talking I noticed those group of guys passing by and saw the same guy who was staring at me in the restaurant and he was still looking at me. "Akong bahala. Kainin mo na yan. Sige salamat." I replied and closed the door not minding the guy and went to bed and before I would cry again I decided to sleep.
Wala akong ibang ginawa kundi matulog at umiyak ng umiyak. Nagising ako ng alas 3 ng madaling araw para umiyak tapos natulog ulit nagising ako ng alas 10 ng Umaga para umihi at hanggang sa pag ihi ko si Tristan ang nasa utak ko kaya umiyak nanaman ako.
Where did I go wrong? May mali ba sa akin? I gave him everything. Minahal ko sya pero bakit ganito?
Magkasama na ba sila ni Rose ngayon? Siguro inaalagaan nya si Rose ngayon at ang magiging anak nila.
That thought killed me deep inside.
Feeling ko namamaga na buong mukha ko sa kakaiyak ko.
Nakatulog ulit ako then I woke up at madilim na ang labas. Wow, sa dalawang araw ko dito iyak at tulog lang ang ginawa ko at walang kain. I decided to go out and eat at the restaurant. I charged my phone but first I removed my sim card. It's already 8 pm so I took a shower and wore a beach dress and my hermes sandals and went out. The cold breeze and the sound of waves is so relaxing. It's so peaceful here, ang ganda.
Pag dating ko sa restaurant wala na masyadong tao. May mga foreigners, mostly couples and that group of boys. I sighed looking at the couples in the restaurant.
Bawal bitter.
I found a vacant table and sat down looking at the darkness of the sky. I feel so alone and I miss Tristan so much. Everything about him. I got so used to the feeling of having him. Hindi ko parin matanggap ang lahat ng nangyari.
"Ma'am? Ano po order nyo?" Si joy. I smiled at her and took the menu from her. "Tuna sandwich nalang joy tsaka isang bucket ng beer." I replied and looked away to the sea. She nodded and left to prepare my order.
"Shantal." I heard manang Elsa say as she pulled the chair across me. "Tumawag ang daddy mo, galit. Hindi ka daw ma contact." She added and looked at me worried. "I'll just call him back manang. Pasensya na." I replied at saktong dumating ang order ko. Nagkasalubong ang kilay ni manang Elsa ng makita nya ang order ko.
"Beer? Tsaka Tuna Sandwich? Ikawng bata ka talaga. Nung isang araw yan lang din ang kinain mo at hindi ka lumalabas sa kwarto mo. Ano ba ang problema?" She said eyeing me but I looked away. All I could hear was the waves and the group of guys laughing. "Manang, sorry but I really want to be alone." I replied and she sighed and nodded her head before standing up and left me to be alone.
When she left my tears fell. Bumalik lahat sa akin. Si Tristan. Si Tristan lang ang laman ng utak ko pero wala na. Paano ako makaka bangon nito? I wiped my tears away and drank my beer and took my sandwich and started eating.
Unti unting naubos ang mga tao sa restaurant at tapos na din akong kumain kaya tumayo na ako hawak hawak ang bucket ng beer dahil sa kwarto ko na to uubosin. I started walking back to my room slowly while kicking some small rock in the path way going to my villa. Muntik na akong matumba dahil naka tatlong bote ng beer na ako mabuti nalang at may nasandalan ako kaya hindi ako tuluyang na tumba. Maybe I'm really tipsy already dahil hindi ko nakita na tao na pala ang nasandalan ko.
"Are you alright?" His voice was as deep as Tristan's. His shoulders were broad, almost as tall as Tristan and he smells good. Just like Tristan. My heart ached with the thought of him on my mind again. I stood up properly to look at the guy in front of me and realized that he was the good looking guy who was always looking at me.
"Yeah. Sorry." I replied and walked pass him going back to my room. "Wag kasi uminom kung hindi kaya. Kay babaeng tao." I heard the guy say when I walked pass him.
"Yeah, whatever. What do you care?" I replied and did not wait for his reply and didn't look back too. As if your opinion matters. Just shut up. Wala akong pakialam.
When I got inside my room I locked my door and fell on the floor as tears poured out from my eyes. I just want Tristan and I want the pain to go away.
Every minute I think about Tristan, mas lalong na wawasak ang puso ko. Wala na, eh. Pira piraso na ang puso ko.
Buak na.