There was a loud thundering in the distance.
Boom. Boom! BOOM!
It was getting louder and louder as Ted ignored it. After all, his first batch was ready and waiting, and he could always go poke his nose around later. With a hiss the door groaned open, and he took in a big whiff. He realized this was a mistake as he began to cough and choke. The strong smell of alcohol seemed to have shocked his system and left him wheezing.
A booming voice rang out from the window over the sink, and it practically shook the ground from under Ted's feet. "Peasant! If you value your life, you will explain where I am. Now."
The voice was commanding, stern, and clearly aggressive, but Ted was still reeling from his poor decision of taking a full load of alcoholic fumes into his lungs. This led Ted to the simple conclusion that he couldn't answer if he wanted to. So, he held up a single finger while he continued to hack up his lungs.
At the window was what some would consider the perfect specimen of a masculine man. A chiseled jawline with a touch of stubble. A proud and prominent nose. Piercing lavender eyes that seemed to look straight through you. Massive muscles threatening to burst through his skin at any moment. A threatening height that made him nearly unnaturally tall. All wrapped up in the most expensive looking medieval noble attire and an aura of superiority mixed with a hint of disdain and rage.
As Ted held a finger up to him, the giant grew furious. He didn't seem to care that Ted was currently trying to find real air as he doubled over from coughing so hard. "Do you not know who I am?" He roared. "I am the great Trizel Forelian. King of the skyborne isles, and conqueror of the desert of monsters. My kingdom has no equal. All look upon me and despair knowing by my whims alone they live or die. Many have come trying to defeat me and all have failed! Even without my vast army my own might and power is second to none! The gods quake at my steps! Demons turn from my gaze and pray I pass them by! My works are so great no scroll could contain them all!"
Trizel let out a powerful huff as he leered at Ted. "Now choose your next actions carefully peasant." His words dripped with venom as he repressed the urge to strike Ted down where he stood. "Where am I? And know that I am not a patient man!"
Luckily for Ted, the little monologue gave him time to catch his breath. "Sorry about that. Just finished a batch of alcohol, and whoo boy! A big whiff of that will put some hair on your chest."
Trizel glared at Ted in silence as outside the window his hand lowered to where his sword would be on his belt. However, there was nothing there. His hand reached around, but, somehow, he was completely unarmed. While he desperately searched his face remained furious and didn't give away any of the concern he now had.
"Anyway, I wish I could help you, but I don't know where here is either." Then, a thought popped into Ted's head. "Hey, did you happen to see two...girls...who hit you over the head and then you woke up here?"
"Do not try lying to me." snarled Trizel. "What fool...are you listening to me!"
Since he had recovered from his coughing fit, Ted had started to move the sugar wash out of the time machine. "Hmm? Yeah of course I'm listening. Just, " he let out a grunt as he dragged the heavy pot of liquid. "I just figure I could try and finish this up while I listened."
Trizel opened his mouth to chastise Ted, but the sloshing brown liquid caught his eye. "Why you insignifi...wait, is that beer?"
Ted let out a laugh. "Beer? Oh no. That'd be way too complicated. This is just...well, alcoholic sugar water, I guess."
"What? You don't even know what it is?" he scoffed.
"Well, I mean, there wasn't a lot of stuff around here, and this was a recipe for a rum I remembered." shrugged Ted as he continued to drag the pot.
Trizel shook his head. "Wait there. You're so weak it's pathetic."
After he said that he walked around to the door and made his way into the kitchen. He was even more imposing standing in the same room. Although it seems the building was more than suitable for him, with ceilings and doors large enough he didn't have to stoop. Ted couldn't remember if things were always that big, but he was distracted by his hope at relief held within this pot. So, he just chalked that up to not paying enough attention.
Trizel motioned for Ted to back away and grabbed the pot which he easily lifted. "Now, where should I put this innkeeper?"
"My name's Ted."
Trizel didn't reply. He just glared down at Ted as he held up the pot as if it was light as air.
"Right. Uh, how about you just put it down on that counter for now."
Trizel nodded and easily moved the near ten gallons of alcohol. After he set it down, he turned to Ted. "Where are your mugs?"
Ted raised an eyebrow but opened the cupboard with rows of wooden mugs. He grabbed one and handed it to Trizel. "I uh, I wouldn't drink that if I were you."
Trizel let out a mocking laugh "Oh? Why is that? IS this a special brew you're making for a big client?" He leaned in close to Ted and bared his teeth in a wicked smile before whispering, "If you think you can stop me, you're free to try."
As he moved away and dunked the mug into the alcohol Ted repeated the warning. "It's not that it's special, more that it will not be very good. Alcoholic, sure, but it won't..." Trizel had already brought the mug to his lips and tilted his head back as he chugged it down.
He made a gagging sound as his body lurched slightly.
"I was trying to warn you. It hasn't even been racked yet, there's a bunch of dead yeast and other off flavors. I mean, the only real flavor is alcohol and sweetness from sugar anyway, but..."
"Silence!" snapped Trizel as he wiped his mouth with his sleeve. He grinned at Ted. "You think I don't see through you? I am not so weak as to be beaten by this barrel. Why it's so light I think I need another to truly taste it!"
As the giant dipped his mug again Ted sighed. It wasn't there for its flavor, but the decently high alcohol content. I mean, he didn't have anything to help the flavor anyway. Not like throwing flour into the mix would've improved things. This time, Trizel let out a satisfied sigh and then dipped the mug a third time. Though instead of drinking it he shoved it towards Ted.
"See! I have conquered this no problem! Now what about you? How well can you handle this?"
Ted sighed. "Not well I'd bet. I never really drank much."
Trizel laughed as he slapped Ted on the back, spilling nearly half of the mug in the process. "An innkeeper that doesn't sample his own stock? You are a strange one."
Ted brought the mug to his mouth, and it was exactly as he thought. It tasted like pure alcohol with a side of sugar, and to make everything worse, it was warm. It was absolutely horrendous, but he managed to chug the entire thing. He was grateful that a good chunk of it had spilled. As he finished, he slammed it down on the counter and coughed as he struggled to keep it down.
Trizel was grinning now. "Alright then. Grab another mug and go set a table up!" he commanded. When Ted didn't immediately move, he repeated himself. "Go on. Set up a table innkeeper! And two chairs of course."
"It's Ted," he sighed but went out of the kitchen anyway. There were plenty of tables, so he just dragged one towards the center of the room. It creaked on the ground as he moved it along, but it turned out to be pretty easy to turn upright. Almost like it wanted to stand. The chairs were easier, despite them being made of heavy oak. As he got the second chair Trizel came striding out with the pot. He set it down next to the table and shook his head as he dropped himself into the one ready chair.
"You forgot the mugs innkeeper."
Ted got the second chair to the table and nodded. "And you forgot my name Trizel Forelian."
"Aha! So, you admit you do know who I am."
"Only because you went into that long speech all about it."
Trizel leaned back in his chair as he tapped his chin. "Did I? Hmm, I suppose I did." he slammed forward abruptly and smiled at Ted. "Fine then! I suppose I shall do you a small favor then." He reached back and pulled out two mugs which he dipped in the barrel and slapped down one in front of himself, and the other in front of the second chair. "Come, sit and let us drink."
Ted shrugged. He had been planning to drink after all. So, this worked for him.
Trizel lifted his mug up and declared. "A toast! To what though...Ah! To the greatest king in all of Kynon! Me!" he pulled his mug back expectantly, and Ted followed suit they both thrust their arms forward and slammed their mugs together. Which of course spilled the foul brown liquid onto the table. Then they both took a drink. Ted was more conservative this time, while Trizel downed the entire drink again. Once empty, he just dipped it in the pot and filled it again.
Trizel looked down at Ted and nodded. "Now, your tongue is hopefully a little looser. Explain to me what you know of this place."
Ted nursed his drink. As he took another sip he began to reconsider. With how bad it tasted it might've been better to just chug it down like Trizel. He shuddered as the sweetness mixed with alcohol clung to his tongue. He could swear he even tasted a hint of cough syrup somehow. "Well, I'll start at the beginning..." Ted went over his circumstances leading to landing here. How his friend had died, and he got caught in some kind of light that grabbed his friend's soul. How he woke up in darkness until finding his friend talking to puppets held up by tentacles. His friend disappeared and he tried to talk to the puppets but heard four different voices. Two with unnaturally sweet voices, and two with horrifyingly inhuman voices that sent a raw primeval fear through him. Before they surrounded him and after a hit to his head, he ended up on the ground just outside. He explained what he could about the shattered world they were on, and the purple core the pieces seemed to rotate around. He explained the lack of variety of food and how he discovered the time machine before changing his clothes and Trizel showing up.
For his part Trizel stayed silent while Ted explained things. When he had finished, the giant of a man let out a sigh and shook his head. "That is not good news...Ted...it seems I was not dreaming either."
"Hmm? Do you know how you got here then Trizel?"
He nodded and downed his entire mug in a single gulp before letting out a relieved sigh. His cheeks had started to redden slightly as he refilled his mug yet again. "Unlike you, I think I died."
"Huh! What happened?"
"It was these punk kids," he sneered. "I had noticed them fighting against my rule but had bigger things to worry about. What with the assault by a coalition of angels and demons. They rightfully thought they could not win against me alone and so attempted to team up. That required my attention while I left the small rebellion be handled by my Saeven, one of my more promising underlings. I was told the rebellion was ended and they were all killed, but it seems she had only been afraid I would have killed her for failing to dispose of them. As not long after they had sieged my castle and confronted me in my own throne room! Those insignificant little brats had the gall to attack me directly! As if the four of them stood as equals against me! But I had underestimated them. They had been slowly gaining power and even found my seven artifacts of power that they turned against me! I thought it was just a nightmare, but it seems I was only deluding myself. The great Trizel Forelian had been slain. The human who rose up to reject our slavery to the old gods fell to mere children!"
He started to tear up and Ted scooted his chair over next to him. He put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head. "Honestly man? That sucks."
Tears dribbled down Trizel's cheeks as he nodded and sniffed. "I know, right? It's not fair at all! You work so hard and then it just all gets taken away because of some plucky punks!" He slammed his head down into the table with such force it bounced up slightly before settling back down as he rested his head atop it. "Was I really that bad of a guy to have in charge? I mean they were all afraid of me, but things couldn't have been that bad, right?"
Ted shook his head. "I wasn't there so I really couldn't say. All I know is that you seem pretty cool. I don't think I'd have minded if you were my boss at my old job. Or like the president or whatever."
"Thanks man," sniffed Trizel. "You're not so bad. You know, for a peasant."
Ted snorted and chugged down the rest of his mug before letting out a groan as his body was still struggling to get used to the liquid. Admittedly it was already far more accepting than it was at his first sip. "And you're not so bad for a dead king. Now why don't we drown our sorrows in some more alcohol and really get this party going!"
The mood quickly changed as they turned to drinking competitions. Soon the empty rock they were on was filled with their offkey singing as they tried to see who could make better verses for a drinking song. The night went on and the two of thing sang and laughed through most of it. Bright red faces and shoulder to shoulder at the end of the night the two of them had made quite a dent in the alcohol, with Trizel's stomach seeming to be nearly bottomless. They would surely regret at least some of this in the morning, but for now the two of them were as happy and carefree as anyone could rightly be.