Chapter 23
First date
When I arrived at work, it was obvious I was going to be distracted all day, my mind unable to forget the vividness of the dream. Each customer looked the same, the fake demeanor on point so they didn't know the difference. The shift went quickly, I checked my phone on break, a message from Drew, waiting for me, "I'm excited to see you later."
I responded with a blushing face emoji, putting my phone away quickly. That was enough to push me deeper in to my anxiety, mulling over what my body obviously wanted. The mark on my neck felt like it was humming, almost content. I sat my last table 20 minutes before the end of my shift, I got them their food and drinks before I saw him.
He was sitting at one of the patio tables, he was wearing a pair of jeans and his favorite football club jersey, just watching me from a distance. Still in my work clothes, I walked out, "Hey, you're early."
He smiled, "I was anxious and didn't want to be late, so I came a bit early."
Flattered, I felt my face burning, "Okay, give me a few minutes, I just need to change and clock out, then we can head out."
"No rush darlin'," His words sending shivers down my spine. My brain immediately flashing back to my dream.
I turned heel and rushed back inside. Ryan was sitting in the back with Stacy, both of them watching me, "Do you know that man Kavi?"
I walked over, punching the clock, "Yeah, he's a friend of mine. We're going out tonight."
Stacy perked up, "Is it a date?"
"Um," I hesitated, "yes, it's a date."
She sighed, "Why are all of the hot men either gay or taken?"
I just ignored her, finding my way to the bathroom. I tried not to overthink my outfit, seeing as how Drew never cared before, he shouldn't start now. I brought a clean pair of leggings, to wear under this short dress. I let my hair down, brushing it to the side and putting on a little lip balm. I saw myself in the mirror, still hating how my arms and chest looked, I tried to hike the dress up, covering my breasts completely.
When I stepped back out, Drew was standing at the counter, chatting with Ryan and Stacy. "Hey, was starting to worry that you were going to stand me up." He smiled.
"We were just getting to know Drew," Stacy piped up, a mischievous smirk on her face, "he's from Scotland, that so cool."
"Yeah," I responded, annoyed, "I think it's time for us to go. Thanks for keeping him company."
"No problem," she smiled again, "pleasure to meet you Drew." As she leaned forward over the counter, watching him.
He reached out, wrapping his arm into mine, leading me out of the café. We walked a few blocks north, he didn't say anything. "So where are we going?" I asked.
"Oh, there's a bar around the next corner, thought we could get a few drinks, maybe talk some more." I felt sick instantly, remembering not only the embarrassing dream, but that I had to tell him about my deal with Madison.
We approached the bar, the bouncer checking IDs yelled over the crowd, "Hey big man!"
Drew smiled back, walking around the line, shaking the man's hand, "Colbert! Didn't know you would be working tonight."
"Who's this beautiful lady? I know you're not dating his ape man, are you?" he looked over to me, laughing.
"She's my girlfriend." He quickly interjected, "and keep your eyes to yourself there." He pushed his face a little, stopping him from looking me up and down. He grabbed my hand, leading me in with him. "Sorry about him, he's always on the prowl for new girls."
I didn't mind him protecting me, hell, I just had a jealous fit at my best friend over a dream… He's got nothing on my jealousy. We headed to the back of the bar, there was a small patio out back, just far enough from the music and dance floor, you could talk. We sat at a table in the corner, just the two of us. It was a little chilly tonight, most people were already on the dance floor for the night.
The waitress shuffled over, "Anything I can get for you, the kitchen closes at 12, so if you want anything, now would be the time."
"Bourbon, top shelf please, straight," I requested politely.
Drew chuckled, "I'll take the same, on the rocks. Preferably cooling rocks, but ice will do." She smiled almost shyly at him, heading back inside.
"Do you know her?" I asked, fiddling with my phone in my lap.
He smirked, "Yeah we might have went out once or twice." The mark on my neck burned suddenly.
I stared him down, "Did you ghost her and now she's bitter?"
"No, I don't ghost people, I'm a man." He said arrogantly.
The waitress appeared again, the bourbons on her tray, "Here you go, anything else I can get you Drew?"
He shook his head, "Not right now."
I looked up at her, "Actually, I think I am going to need a little something else, maybe a LA water?" Trying to drip condescension.
She looked at me confused, "You want tap water?"
I chuckled, leaning forward a bit, letting my top droop, "No that's a long island, minus the cola, add midori instead." She smiled politely, shuffling off again, embarrassed.
"Dang Kavi, put the claws away." He laughed, taking a drink.
I shrugged, doing the same. A few minutes later, she came back with the other drink, sitting it down. "Thanks doll." I said, doing my best Madison impression. Dripping condescension.
The girl walked off again, "What the hell was that? Why were you so mean to her?"
I rolled my eyes, "I wasn't being mean, I was just making sure she stopped flirting with you and looking at you like you're a piece of meat."
He laughed loudly, "I have that effect on women, once they get a taste, they want to keep coming back. It's my cock, I promise." He winked. We both laughed, drinking some more. "So," he said more seriously, "I'm sorry for the girlfriend remark earlier, I didn't want you to be uncomfortable and that's all I can think about."
"Don't worry, it's just a term." I assured him politely.
"Well," he paused, "he wouldn't have stopped trying to flirt with you had I not. And, although normally I am okay with competition, I don't want to deal with it tonight."
We sat in silence for a moment, both of us drinking more. "I have something I need to ask you."
He raised his eyebrow, "Yeah, um, sure."
Taking a deep breath, I started, "Do you know what Madison does for a living?"
He shook his head, "I'm guessing you finally figured it out."
"Yeah, thanks for not telling me, left me looking like an idiot." I took a long drink, almost finishing it.
"Well, I didn't think it was my place. I don't necessarily care what she chooses to do with her body, but it never sat well with me. And it bothered me more that she never told you."
"Well," I avoided eye contact, "she had a big falling out with her client recently. So, she lost a lot of her income, pretty quickly."
"That explains why you're always working." He sipped his drink, "Want another? It's on me."
I smiled, "You should probably retract that offer before you end up very broke."
"It's worth it." He waved down a different server, asked him to bring the bottle. I tried not to read too much into it, I think he wants to butter me up and get me talking.
"So, as I was saying," I took a breath, "she made me an offer to join her in a venture, something that can get her a new financier and give me enough cash to leave town."
He sat his drink down, his expression changed a bit, "And what kind of venture, Kavi, are you considering joining her profession?"
I was embarrassed, my face flushing, "I am going to join her in a onetime endeavor, and she's going to split the money with me." I said with all of the courage I could muster.
The waiter brough the bottle, sitting it on the table, quickly reading the air and power walked away. Drew filled up our glasses, taking the rest of his glass in a single shot. Sitting there, I thought I was going to explode. The mark burned again, but no shooting pain, I just toughed through it, waiting for his reaction. "I'm not sure what to say Kavi, I know it's your choice."
"I know it seems extreme, you know, with all that stuff…" my words caught in my throat.
"Yeah that's an understatement." He snapped, trying to control himself, he took a deep breath, his face was flushed.
"You think I'm disgusting for even considering it, don't you?"
"No," he said, emphatically, "there is nothing wrong with casual sex or sex work, it's just… a shock I guess." He took another drink, his face getting redder. I knew he was very quickly getting fucked up.
"I need to do this for myself." I said, sure of myself.
"Kavi," He started, "there are other ways to get what you want, it doesn't have to be like this…"
I rolled my eyes, ready to face his wrath, "It's not about the money Drew."
"Then," he stopped, having to lower his voice, "why do it?"
What kind of explanation can I give? What reasoning would make him understand that I needed to be able to let go. "Everyone gets their experiences when they have sex for the first time. Almost always awkward and usually a mistake. I didn't get that." I said, trying to reason, "That was taken from me. I don't want my first time to be some beautiful, amazing thing. I want it to be awkward and a mistake, just like everyone else."
"Then go find someone to hook up with and move on, if that's what you think you need." He exasperated.
"I don't actually want any of them." I shrugged, drinking a bit more, "Let alone all this baggage! I know men are pigs, but they'd probably have an issue with me weeping openly why we were doing it."
"I just…" He stopped, leaning back, "maybe you get to be a lucky one. You get to have an amazing experience for your first time. If I have it my way anyhow." He finished, looking like he regretted it immediately.
I did nervously chuckle, "I can't. I'm too broken for that. I have to do this to break this wall around me when it comes to sex. I know it's going to be ugly," I paused, reaching my hands out, "I don't want to ruin what we have. It's special, and I want be able to open up to you sexually and enjoy myself for once."
He seemed to have a moment, he sighed, his face going back to normal, "I understand. I guess it makes sense, this is a mental boundary for you, and this is you taking a leap, hoping it will fix things." I nodded, watching his face, trying to see how much of a front he is putting on. He raised his head, looking me in the eyes again, "Be safe whatever you decide."
He raised his glass, and we clinked, both of us falling into our drinks quietly. He smirked, pouring more for us, and I quipped, "We should probably not both get shit faced."
"Don't worry love, I'll take care of both of us. I think we need this." He became somber, slumping in his chair a bit.
"I can head out if you'd rather me not be here." I asked, my fear of rejection driving me to speak.
"Of course not, I may be a little shocked, but it doesn't change anything. It's not like we're married." He chuckled gently, a slight smile on his face now.
"You are just amazing." I said, maybe a little too drunk.
He smiled, that weaken the knees smile, "I've been trying to tell you that for a while." He seemed to get a little shy, "You're a pain in my ass sometimes, but I just adore you. Fuck, I'm an idiot." He laughed, raising his glass again.