Ji-Ha's pov
I walked inside the wake of my father and saw my mom all in black in the front seats. She looked back at me and stand up.
"I'm sorry mom, I'm here now." Those were the first word I said. I came to run at her and hugged her. I know it's really weird I don't feel anything about my father's death. Probably because we really didn't get close or anything. But when I looked at my mom, she looked more relieved than ever. There are no signs of grief or anything. But I shake those thoughts, she is probably just too good at hiding the grief.
"It's ok" she pats my head, "I ask your aunt and cousin to stay with him, for now. Can I talk to you outside?"
"Uhm sure mom"
Mom leads me to the cafe nearby the wake. We chatted a bit and told stories about family and work.
"Make sure to bring your husband and son soon ok?"
"Of course mom. I just wonder why we have to leave here."
She smiled bitterly. "Actually I have something to admit to you... I plan to live with my lover after your father's burial."
"LIVE WITH YOUR LOVER?" I can't believe what she just said now. My mom is a dedicated and loyal housewife. A kind and gentle mom actually cheated on my dad.
"I know it's hard to take I'm sorry. I meet her when I brought your father to the hospital and... Hah, how selfish of me... I'm sorry but I really want to spend my last days with her now. Making up the days that we should be together..."
"What do you mean?"
"We have been dating since I was a teenager til grandfather found out and marry me off to his best friend's son, which is your father... I never once love him but I also don't hate your dad and he's always been nice to me..."
I can't believe what I am hearing. I choked up and slapped the table with my hand. "Then why did you just let dad do that to me too? You just keep quiet all this time. You should at least support me or talk to dad about it. Did you know how empty I feel, especially now?"
"I'm so sorry Ji-Ha... I thought that..." She signed. "No more excuses, anything I say is unacceptable. I just want to say sorry... If you want me to cut off your life I'm fine with it. I will not take any inheritance from your father. I told the lawyer that you will get the house and what's supposed to be mine will be given to your aunt and cousins..."
Then she lifted her head "I will not force you to accept my decision we are an adult now Ji-Ha... For that with a family... You can hate or cut ties with me all you want but I really just want to be free in my last days..."
I signed and scratch my head. "Ok, mom at least make me recover and make decisions here and there. Anyway, I don't mind you taking some inheritance for your and your lover's happy days. I am not been that close to dad since that day and gotta admit I despise him for his Decision..." And then I tapped her shoulder.
"I'm sorry about that. I'll support your decision if you decided to divorce him."
"Well, that's actually too late now... Recently he's getting more spotlight now. I don't want to tarnish his career because of this..."
"Oh right, hmm I can work on my connections to protect his image. That's the least I can do for you then"
"Ah, there's no need. I still haven't decided if I should proceed anyway..."
"But it looks like you already found the source of your glow."
I cough from my drink when she said those words. Am I that obvious?
"I'm kidding you probably finally learned to love your husband. I envy you..."
I signed. After her courage to say her decision. I don't want to lie to her anymore.
"No you are right mom, I found someone I love. You know that I only love girls."
She put don't her drink and looked at it. She smiled bitterly at it. "I passed my misery luck to my daughter... I'm so Ji-Ha I really should have helped you that time..."
"No worries, it already happened... He is too nice to me I don't want to hurt him again..."
"Again?"
"He saw me kissing someone long ago... We didn't tell anyone about it. I know it still hurts him till this day..." I saw her looking at me. And now I looked down and grip the cup that I am holding. I have bottled up my guilt for years and for the first time ever I found someone to trust...
"I didn't mean it... I'm sorry..." I choked up and suddenly I felt warm arms surround me. Mom hugged me.
"Is she the same person you love today?"
I shake my head.
"Keep her close for now. Whatever path you take. From now on, mommy will always support you. I will be here if you need me. Ok?" And I hold her closer and cried.
Then when I finally calmed down. She asked. "Do you want to meet her?"
I looked at her and nodded. She called the waiter and whispered something. The waiter nods and went to the staff room.
In a bit, an old but youthful lady came to our table. She looked at us with an elegant smile.
"Oh, honey is this your daughter? Nice to meet you Ji-Ha" she extends her hands. "You can call me mommy if you want."
"Ji-Ho stop teasing her. By the way Ji-Ha she's the lover I am talking about."
My jaw almost dropped. I can't believe my mom also liked women all along.
I grip her extended hand and hug her. "Please take care of my mom"
"Of course dear I will."
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I woke up and a major headache welcomed me. Gosh, how many bottles did I drink? How many hours am I sleeping? My memory is still foggy since I just woke up.
I tried to stand up but failed, so all I can do is rub my temples. Then suddenly I remember something.
I confess to Sarah. And what's worse I fuck her. This is much worse than last time. And what's more, I initiated it.
"Aaaaahhhh" I hit my head. How can I face her now, she probably will avoid and block me now. What should I do now?
Someone's knocking in the room and Jeremy came in holding a thermostat.
"Mama you are awake. Papa is out of work so he asked me to give this to you since you are sick. Make sure to eat it." He gives me the thermos and a bowl.
Oh yeah, Dohyung is the one who brought me here... He is probably the one who made this too.
I looked at my son. I can't believe this sweetest kid came from me.
I looked at him and said, "Thank you". And started to eat the Haejang-guk (hang-over soup).