"The monsters were never
under my bed.
Because the monsters
were inside my head.
I fear no monsters,
for no monsters I see.
Because all this time
the monster has been me."
-Nikita Gill
While Tracy and Misrey were pulling me away, shouting for me to listen, I watched as Ezra turned from a handsome male human to something...else. His skin melted into a liquid and slid down his body, steaming up as his true form took its place.
Glowing blue eyes took place of his human green ones. Black hair sprouted on his head, growing long down his back. Instead of a face, there was a skull-like head on his shoulders, but it didn't look human at all. From the shoulders down was a furry mess of a body – actually, scratch that! It wasn't necessarily fur, but hair so thin, you could see the bones beneath. There was no skin, no barrier to keep the bones safe, and there also seemed to be no organs. Just bones and hair. His hands turned into claws, clenching and unclenching. His feet were long and bare. When he opened his mouth, there were fangs: two on top, two on the bottom. He hissed at me! Hissed!
I heard someone hiss, "Xualhaji!"
My throat closed up, my head spun, my body felt numb and shaky together. I wanted to run and hide. I wanted to go home. I wanted to forget this nightmare and live a normal life with my family. I wanted to forget there was such a thing as another world full of monsters and shadows and nightmares. I wanted nothing but to forget this danger I was in. I wanted to live with my family and have the silly pranks my brother would play on me, not have everything I've ever had nightmares about come true.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I must have fainted because the next thing I know is that I'm in a bed with Xheee staring down at me. I begin to sit up, but he rests a gentle hand on my shoulder. "Easy there, Nicole. Don't rush yourself."
"Get away from me!" I snarl.
He blinks. "Nicole, please--"
"Don't!" I scramble away from him and look around. I see it was my room in Ezra's house. "Where's Edna?"
He raises a brow. "I think you need to calm down, Human. Talk to me. Tell me what's going on inside that mind of yours."
I shake my head. "No! I want to go home! Let me go home!"
Xheee sighs and walks out of the room. There is murmuring outside my door, but I don't care. I jump out of bed and run to the window. Opening it, I look down the two stories to the ground where monsters are roaming. I gulp, slumping my shoulders.
"Nicole?"
I jump and look back to see Daeva gazing at me with worried brown eyes. "I'm sorry," I say softly. "I can't stay here."
"He didn't mean it," she whispered. "He didn't mean to scare you."
I smile at her, the only one who didn't seem to want me to be scared of anything. "Daeva, he's meant to scare me since I first saw him. He's meant everything he's done to me. What he did earlier proves that."
"I thought we were friends?" she asks, tears rolling down her cheeks.
"We are. I would never hurt you," I say.
"Then stay!"
I open my mouth to argue, only to see someone else step inside the room. My mouth closes as Ezra walks up to Daeva and whispers in her ear. He's back in the human form I'm used to, but I can tell he isn't happy. His body is stiff, his eyes narrowed on me, his movements slow and calculating. Daeva nods and walks out of the room.
Before she closes the door, she turns to me and says, "Just because he's a monster, Nicole, doesn't mean the rest of us are." With that, she leaves.
I cross my arms and glared at Ezra. He stands and walks to the bed, sitting on it, and looks at me. "I will take you home after you answer a question."
My eyes narrow on him. "A question of how frightened I was?"
He ignores me and says, "Whenever I get angry or have strong emotions, my beast comes out. I can't hold back. I know we were fighting earlier, I know you only did what I wanted you to do, but do you perhaps think that I wanted this to happen?"
"I don't care what you want any more, Ezra. I've had enough!" I threw my hands up and give a harsh laugh. "You terrified me! Happy? You terrified me to the point where I regret meeting you." I slump against the window. "I just want to go home."
"You didn't answer my question," he says softly.
"I don't know what you wanted. It happened, it's done and over with. You got what you wanted, now let me go."
He stands up and walks to the door. Before he opens it, he says, "And the Shadow?"
I feel tears in my eyes. "I don't care."
After he's gone and I'm alone, I run to the bed and cry into the pillows. After I've had time to cry myself out and think, I make myself leave the room and go downstairs where Tracy, Misrey, Daeva, Xheee, Ezra, and Edna are waiting. I don't look at the tiny spirit girl who is crying, not wanting to be persuaded to stay. I don't look at the snake woman or the other spirit girl, not wanting to see the anger on their faces I'm sure is there. I just go to Edna and pet her beak gently.
"I shall return as soon as I know Nicole is with her family," Ezra says to the others. "If there's trouble, you know how to contact me."
"What about the Shadow?"
"I'll figure that out along the way."
Edna nudges me in the shoulder, encouraging me to get on. I do, burying my fingers in her feathers, feeling the warmth her body brings to my own. After a moment, Ezra climbs on behind me and Edna is walking out the door. I feel Ezra's arms wrap around me before Edna flaps her wings and takes off.
Below, monsters look up at us and wave like normal humans would. Others roar their goodbyes to Ezra and Edna while still others try to chase us, but Edna is too fast. Before I know it, we're nearing the Gate.
"If the Shadow finds you, I want you to get a hold of me as soon as you can," Ezra says in my ear. "Do not try to fight it on your own."
"Because I'm weak?" I say with disgust.
"Because I don't want you to get hurt!" he growls at me.
I don't say anything as Edna swoops through the Gate and we're surrounded by the forest where Hannah and her brothers took me camping. Edna doesn't stop though, just keeps flying until the forest is far away and we're passing over different landscapes. Finally, I decide to say, "How do I contact you? My phone is destroyed."
Behind me, I feel him move, then, his hand appears before me, a new phone in it. "My number is in here. You'll have to add your family and friends. I will have mine on me at all times. I'll be listening for any alert you send."
I take the device and turn it on, smiling at the photo Ezra took of his friends. I tap on the phone icon and see his name there. Turning my head, I look at him. His grey eyes are warm and apologetic. "Thank you."
He nods as Edna lowers us to the ground. I see my family's property a short distance away and breathe in the fresh air.
Once we're on the ground, Ezra helps me down and walks with me to my driveway. "I thought monsters go crazy if here for too long?" I ask him.
"We do. It's because there's fear all around."
"How come you aren't going crazy?"
He gives me a smirk. "You have."
I blink then stop walking to stare at him. "I thought you were just angry?"
Shrugging, he says, "In Uithcoth, it's the same. We're so in tune to our strong emotions that they make us crazy."
"Why couldn't you just stop and calm down?"
"You try to calm some strong emotion down that takes over your body and mind." When I don't answer, he chuckles. "It's not that easy, Nicole."
We continue walking until we turn onto my drive. Before I could forget, I ask, "What's Xualhaji mean?" He looks at me with mournful eyes. I'm not sure if it's about me or what, but he looks reluctant to say. To reassure him, I say, "I heard Tracy or Misrey say it before I passed out. I was just wondering."
He sighed. "It means Death."
I furrow my brows. "Why would they say that?"
"Because I am deadly when my emotions get the better of me.
I swallow the lump in my throat and hug myself. "I'm sorry," I say softly.
"Don't be." he wraps his arms around me and embraces me against his warm body. "It's why I didn't want you to see it." Pulling back and getting on Edna, he gives me a small smile. "Stay safe, Nicole."
I nod and watch as Edna takes off with him, disappearing into the sky. Another tear runs down my cheek and I turn away and to my home.