If it was twice or thrice, then maybe she wouldn't have felt that bad. After all, who doesn't face a few rejections in their life? But, when every time she got rejected, depression and self-doubt hit her. She was at the lowest point in her life. Her hope, her dream, and her happiness were crashing right in front of her and she could do nothing but simply watch.
All this while, she was drowning in self-blame, depression thinking that maybe she wasn't good enough. Maybe her acting talents weren't good enough, or maybe there was some kind of a fault in her. Not knowing that the culprit was just beside her. Her husband who claimed to love and support her was the one who created all these hurdles of rejection in her path.
Whenever she was feeling low, when she was blaming herself or wallowing in depression, he was the one pulling her back on her feet. He always showed his support for her. When she doubted herself and her talents, he was the one who showed his faith in her. In those times, she realized that maybe she was wrong about him.
Yesterday, she was so happy because Director Shen who was also a dear friend or more like an elder of hers decided to give her a chance in his new movie.
She audition for the role and was a little nervous, not knowing whether she had done enough to get the role. Luckily, Director Shen was satisfied with her acting. She couldn't express how happy she was when she got the role after all the rejections she had seen. However, today morning, she got the news that some other actress was chosen for the role instead of her.
At first, she was surprised and brushed it off thinking that it was fake news. She tried to contact Director Shen but couldn't do so. Later this morning, Qin Yufeng confirmed the news and told her that Director Shen rejected her because he thought that someone else was better than her. She was so heartbroken at the news that for the entire day she was moping in her room, refusing to come out or eat anything.
However, Qin Yufeng didn't let her cry for long. Seeing her state, he refused to go to work, canceled all of his business deals, and remained by her side. He supported her, helped her sort out her emotions, and helped her deal with her rejection. To liven up her mood, he even threw this party at the cruise ship he had gifted her on their first wedding anniversary. Though it wasn't the way she liked to be cheered up, but she appreciated his gestures to cheer her up.
Now, standing in front of him and hearing his words, she felt like laughing at her own stupid self.
How could she even think that a man who was capable of hurting others wouldn't hurt her?
How could she even think of being grateful to him?
Qin Yufeng felt guilty when he saw the tears falling from her eyes. He raised his hand towards her face, wanting to wipe her tears but she pushed him away. "Don't touch me," she looked at him with hate. "You are disgusting, Yufeng. You broke my trust. I hate you!!!
He sighed. "Love, please, just listen to me. I didn't want to do this..."
"Then why did you?" she screamed at his face.
"I am sorry," he apologized.
"Don't say those words when you don't mean it," she snapped at him.
Qin Yufeng really didn't know how to explain his feelings and thoughts to her. She was so angry that she was not ready to listen to him. She wasn't ready to understand what he was trying to say to her. He loved her. He cared about her. He knew she was talented and she could act really well. But, he didn't want her to become a part of that industry. He couldn't see her become something he hated.
"Love, look, I know how -"
"I will act, Yufeng." Bai Liyue interrupted him, wiping her tears. "I won't give up on my dream just because you said so."
"You have no other option, love." Qin Yufeng tried to explain. "If I stand in your path, then you will never be able to achieve your dreams. Please, I beg you. Give up. Don't go against me. It will only break your heart and make you sad. Love, try and understand. I love you. I really do. My heart belongs to you. I belong to you. All that I have belongs to you. Why do you need to act? Please, don't do this. Don't make me the villain of your life."
Bai Liyue laughed. "I don't have to make you one. You already ARE the biggest villain of my life."
"Love....."
"You claimed to love me, Yufeng. Is this how you show your love for me? If this is how you show your love for me, then you don't love me at all. You are simply obsessed with me."
"Don't say that!"
"Truth hurts right?" she sneered.
Anger flashed through Qin Yufeng's eyes and he grabbed her arms, pulling her closer to him. "It is not an obsession. I love you. Yeah, I might be wrong in showing how I love you but it is not an obsession. Don't you ever say that! Do you hear me?"
"Really? Who are you kidding, Yufeng? I am not a three years old girl who cannot understand things. You are obsessed with me. You always have been since the first day you saw me. You know what? I regret that day when I met you and saved your life. Ever since you appeared in my life, nothing good has ever happened to me. And now I know why, it's because you never let any good things happen to me."
"You mean you were never happy with me?"
"No!"
"THEN WHY DID YOU GET MARRIED TO ME?" Qin Yufeng roared. "Remember love, I didn't come to you with the marriage proposal, you did. I didn't force you to take that pen and sign that contract, you did it with your own free will. You had other options but you chose ME!"