It is said that there are many very hateful habits in this world. For example, every day there is someone next to you who cares and cares, at that time, seeing that person is so hateful, you want to stay away. But then there comes a time when that person is not around, and suddenly remembers. Then I don't know when I got used to the other person's warmth.
Habits are hard to break, they say. Habits are formed in the unconscious, by the time we recognize ourselves, it's too late.
Love he...
Love he...
Sitting blankly in the garden, the surroundings sank into silence. From time to time, I could faintly hear the sound of a car running on the street, the rustling sound of a fat cat rolling around in the grass playing with the pistil grass, the other cat seemed to forget that he was a cat, he turned into a honey bee. gliding back and forth over that wildflower. Canh Yen looked at his cat, he laughed, raised his hand to his stomach, and gently stroked it.
Looks like something is missing today. But what's missing?
He didn't know but felt extremely unfamiliar with this lonely feeling, missing someone's shadow, someone's shadow. Stunned, his hand was still holding a book on taking care of babies. The baby is about to be born, the more you have to prepare to welcome the baby. Read books so that you still know what to do later, read a lot of related books, even some books on how to teach children have already read.
The doctor said that now the baby has reacted to his mother, who is pregnant, so he should advise him to talk, confide, or simply rub his belly, which is easy because he usually does that. Canh Yen also often listens to music, reads a few books of poetry he likes, and dreams about the prospect that his child will be a writer or scientist in the future. Whatever, you don't need to be excellent, as long as you're healthy and the rest is up to you, you'll be fine.
A father, he simply wished for that, a healthy baby, always happy, not worried about life, this whole life was completely free from any suffering.
Gently patting his round belly, the corner of his mouth turned up into a sweet smile. He daydreamed about a tomorrow, one day he would hold the hand of a cute little child, father and son would laugh and say something, the two of them would walk together to the place where the sun shone. There, on the other side of the baby, there was another hand-holding, he also smiled happily looking at the two of them.
Startled, Canh Yen patted his head and scolded himself for watching too many romantic movies these days, how could he dream like that?
But, come to think of it, he seems to be busy today and won't come.
"Remember him?" Murmuring, he was angry with himself for his dirty thoughts and turned his head to continue reading. That round belly suddenly felt bloated, he reached out to touch and caress, the baby kicked again.
Because his health is very good, even though he was not healthy during pregnancy, the baby developed very well. These days, this kid has been pedaling very enthusiastically, he feels like he has to pedal every day to remind him that he's coming out and quickly prepare to welcome him. At first, I saw my stomach rising strangely, then it disappeared again, changing to the other side. At that time, I don't know what he was thinking, it was like there was a monster in his stomach, surprised and happy.
In the past, he had heard some evil friends he knew over there talking about women's pregnancies. At that time he didn't pay much attention, but he remembered someone saying a sentence that made him remember forever, 'Men do it once and then forget it for the rest of their lives, women are happy once but suffer for a lifetime.'
Women are always at a disadvantage because they can become pregnant, an ability that normal men cannot do, well, except in a few special cases. But, indeed, they always lose, really because they are the ones who bear all the consequences, and the other man, whether voluntary or forced, doesn't have anything, it's terrible to feel guilty or responsible.
Women are very strange, especially when pregnant, their personality is almost sunny and rainy, he also understands that feeling. Although not everyone is the same, when pregnant, no one is around, it is very difficult. At night, my legs hurt but I have to get up and massage myself, sometimes I can't eat, I can't sleep because the whole person is numb and I don't understand why. Many times he was so upset that he wanted to cry, feeling sorry for himself, not understanding why he had to suffer this situation. Whenever that happens, I get angry, angry, then sad again. It was a feeling that many men understood.
Many times, he naturally thought about giving up on the child.
This thought only passed for a moment, but then he slapped himself hard. Why have this thought?
Perhaps at that time, he was in a very crisis of mind, so that thought came up, although it was sudden, it was enough for him to understand that he was in crisis. He started to panic. The month of pregnancy made his belly grow bigger and bigger, it was much more difficult to walk, although Aunt Giao took good care of him, but not always, sometimes he couldn't sleep so he had to walk around the house alone. Alone, leaning against the door, looking into the distance.
And every time he did, he called.
Canh Yen doesn't know if he has a camera installed in his house or not. He has never seriously looked for it either. When he answered the phone, he acted like he was disgusted on the outside, but to be honest, he was very happy at that time, a shared feeling made him a lot better. And every time like that, he would run over, forgetting to say that this guy is very invested in buying the whole house next to your house, as long as you can't sleep, he will come and massage your feet, talk nonsense. about a story that doesn't go anywhere and waits for him to sleep before he comes back.
Many times, then become used to it.
Known since when.
Canh Yen can't help looking out the door, waiting to see if someone comes to his house, not waiting for him, he just waits for the delivery. Who wants to wait for him to do...
The sound of the car suddenly stopped, his eyes shone with an unnamed joy as if realizing that someone he had been waiting for had arrived. The gate opened, the familiar car ran into the garage, very quickly a young man ran out, he smiled softly at him, still holding a small bag in his hand. Canh Yen made a disgusted face and didn't pay attention, he read the book in his hand attentively, waiting for him to sit down before he asked in a voice:
"Is the wedding party over?"
Dong Khanh took the bag of cakes he had just asked to make on the table, fragrant biscuits made by the hands of a leading pastry chef. Because yesterday he said he wanted to eat him immediately to the contact person, fortunately, today the wedding party was made by the other person, so he came to get it. Handing him the cake, he conveniently rearranged the books on the table, nodded, and said:
"It's over, everyone's happy."
Canh Yen only hummed, although he had already called to congratulate him, he still felt very sorry. After all, the two sisters were friends with him from childhood to adulthood, as good as sisters in the family, but such an important day could not come. I don't know if the sisters are sad or not.
"Those two don't blame me."
"Um, I'll apologize after giving birth later." He ate the cake.
Dong Khanh saw him drop his soul in the distance, he looked at him with a thoughtful chin, so cute. Glide down to the big belly over there, the loose shirt let down to make him more comfortable, the belly is big and the baby is big. He calculated that around mid-June the baby was born. This time he was very active in making friends, he had a feeling that after he was born, everything would return to its original position if he did not win his affection. Canh Yen's personality is quite complicated, his emotions are also complicated since then, he can't guess what he is worried about, as well as what he is afraid of.
Maybe he already knew, but it was in his subconscious, like something obvious he realized but his reason still hadn't been found. He takes care of you not just for the baby, but he is a man, of course, he has to protect the person he loves. He loves you, loves you more than anyone on this earth. No one could compare, not even his parents, or anyone he had ever met.
His subconscious urges him to quickly capture this young man's feelings as quickly as possible, like quickly locking him in his love cage, otherwise, it will go crazy. His feelings are very straightforward but very loyal, a kind of absolute loyalty.
He may have talked about love with a few people in the past, but how many of those words are true. He can feel that these people are very satisfying, bring him the sexual satisfaction of men, and can also make him happy a little. But that's all, he didn't pay much attention, after a few months of a relationship, he also found something new. He lived like that day by day.
Maybe you feel disgusted if he says he loves you. But it was true, a sincere word he hadn't said for a long time. He was in a world of lies since childhood, a happy family of lies of love, and lies of laughter. He was so used to it, gradually tying himself up, turning into a liar. He was never honest with himself, painted himself a genuine smile, wrote himself a flashy resume. But all are lies.
Except, that saying, 'I love you.'
It's been a long time since he said the sincere words, he forgot that he could also utter those sincere words. He seemed to dig out his heart and liver to give it to him, a kind of intense possessive desire gradually arose in his heart. A feeling that he couldn't explain in words.
Dong Khanh looked at him, gentle and deep, he reached out his hand to touch the face near but far away. Lifting it, he hesitated again. Be afraid. Afraid that if you touch, the other person will disappear, like a ball of water outside the rain, broken mourning will never be mended. Afraid that if you touch it, your hand will not be able to retract it.
The hand kept raising, hesitated for a while, then withdrew, lowered her eyes, and asked: "Does baby make you uncomfortable?"
"Huh? No, it was very enthusiastic when I started pedaling. Looks like I want to get out." As soon as he finished speaking, he continued to pedal, he seemed to have lived near him for many days, he also got used to it, holding his hand and placing it on his stomach, gently tapping his belly a few times, "Touch it, don't kick very hard."
Dong Khanh was also startled, his hand felt the kick of life in your belly. This is not the first time he feels it before he waited until he was asleep before daring to touch it, every time he felt every movement of the baby growing in his stomach, he felt a strange feeling. emotions cannot be put into words. At this time, he was even more emotional, for the first time he took the initiative to let him touch the baby.
The hand gently pressed in, although it was a layer away from the outer layer, Canh Yen also felt the warmth of the other hand. Is it because you already know him so well, why did you let him touch you? Although it's not for anyone to touch, the other guys always come over and press him to rub him back and forth, bored, but this time he took the initiative to let him touch the child.
Canh Yen is of course not stupid, he has lived an opinionated life since he was a child, and with a lot of observation, of course, he realizes his feelings, and yours.
You see, since the age of 18, he has started talking about love everywhere, although he considers himself to like something about the girls, that feeling is not real, it is just a flowery story of young people who like to play. just kidding. But among those girls, it's not like there isn't someone who has true feelings. He had met a girl, now no longer in contact, heard that he also found a new one. But when they got to know each other, that girl had feelings for him. It's very complicated to deal with problems after breaking up, but during the relationship, she has gestures and acts of concern, as if she was close to him. Especially the eyes, it contains a deep affection that is always directed towards him, only looking at him.
Canh Yen understands those eyes, he used to have the same view of a girl. Also always towards that person, always following every step, every gesture, every voice, and laughter is always directed towards that person. You know, you've been in love, of course, you understand.
It's just, maybe you're scared. He's not stupid enough to even have feelings for him without realizing it. You're just lying to yourself.
Since when did you have such a crush on him? I don't know, maybe it just happened, maybe yesterday, it was a beautiful day. You don't know, who knows when you like the other person, and know why you like the other person.
In his eyes, he was completely nothing special. It sounds a bit funny, people would still scold him for being arrogant, why is he so outstanding but nothing special? But, in his eyes, what he had was completely meaningless.
He may succeed early, but his father built a career on his own and succeeded very soon. My brother and I were geniuses from a young age, when we were 16 years old, we built our own company, and when we grew up, we took over the family company. Those things are not so great, who can compare?
As for the value of beauty, he is far behind the family of the other Nhim by dozens of kilometers. It's not that he flatters Bang Du, but he's so outstanding, so outstanding that he's been with him since he was a child, to the extent that if he compares it to be honest, not many people will let him compliment him. Not to mention among the people he knows, some people are as outstanding in terms of sharpness as Nhim, like Ope, like Tao is the sworn brother of Nhim. In comparison, Dong Khanh only stops at the handsome level.
So those things don't make an impression on him anymore, but honestly, it's not just him, but a few other people, for example, as is the third sister Cat Vy, both of them are immune.
So you don't like him because he's good, he's excellent, he's perfect and handsome like everyone admires. Perhaps, perhaps, because he quietly cares for you. Canh Yen is not a heartless person, he is very attentive to what others do, each one simply gets him a basin of warm water, anxiously pours some ginger oil to warm his feet. Now and then he would see him surreptitiously reading a few books on the shelf about taking care of the pregnant woman and the unborn child. Or, he recognized him every time he used to sleep quietly touching his stomach.
Just touching, then deep words of love for the baby, it sounds cheesy, but warms his heart. The father-son relationship, he couldn't cut it, it was connected by an invisible and mysterious rope. It can be reattached, it can also be broken and reconnected when it's not good. You know he loves you, and you know he loves you.
Canh Yen finished listening to that whisper, he had been running away for a long time but when he heard it one evening. He only dared to whisper when he was asleep, he was afraid, afraid that he would despise him and not let him be around.
At that time, he was shocked but then did not know what to do. You understand him, perhaps sympathize with his fear and fear. But at that time, he did not accept it.
But, as time went by, the two became acquainted. Although he is still cold on the outside, maybe even his third sister who always understands him can't feel it, even the delicate Nhim doesn't realize it. But from the bottom of his heart, he began to weave a red thread. The thread has since been connected to the thread in his heart.
Did you love him yeah when?
Pity is not pity. Love is a very strong and persistent emotion, it is hidden for thousands of years in a person's heart, it takes root there so that when people realize it, people can't stop loving it. Maybe love is the premise of love, you must know how to love before you can love, but many people know how to love but do not know how to love. Love is not the same as love, it is gentle, peaceful, tolerant. Unlike passionate love, passionate, monopolized forever.
You can't say you love him, not to the point of madness yet. Love can have many definitions, 'no one can define the word love'. Passionately in love with each other, enjoying every minute of each other, trying to unite soul and body together. But love brings with its selfishness, greed, and envy. But love is different, it tolerates all.
Right now, you can only love him...
He loves you, or you love him. Not pity, but pity. Beloved does not know why he loves, loves, and can't say, love, loves gently, but deeply.