["The moon is beautiful tonight," he heard the man from his dream say and felt a hand holding his own.
"Yes, it is."
He watched as the wind played with long black hair and the sleeves danced softly. He could barely make out who it was, but he looked forward to sleeping every time just to be here with him. There was something about this man that made him feel safe.
"Will you tell me who you are now?"
Every time he questioned this, he received no answer. The man reached out to tuck a strand behind his ear. A sigh escaped his lips as he closed his eyes feeling the fingers rub his ear.
"I wish you were real…" he whispered quietly.
"I am."
He opened his eyes, laughing softly, and moved closer to the man he was infatuated with.
"I suppose you are. I just… I just want to stay here with you."
The warped voice laughed and leaned close to him, rubbing their noses making him giggle.
"Soon, my love," he felt hands smooth across his face, "It has been so long."
He blinked trying to clear the distorted figure, "Soon?"
The figure closed in and he shut his eyes as lips touched his forehead. The smell of wood and plum blossoms filled his nose. So familiar, yet so strange.
"I have waited for many years," the voice sounded sad and he felt an ache in his heart, "Will you not return to me? I will not let you go."
Fingers ran through his hair before cupping his cheeks. Breathe tickled his nose as the person moved closer, enveloping his sense of smell once more.
"Then don't let me wake up."
"Come back to me again," the voice whispered, "My love."
Lips moved in closer to his until-]
The sound of the bell ringing signified the end of the school day, jolting him from his sleep. A boy with short platinum blonde hair blinked as he sat up straighter. Looking around, he saw eyes on him and he flushed with embarrassment.
"Bai Lan, I would like to speak with you."
His orange eyes blinked over to see a frown on his teacher's face. Gulping down, he waited until his classmates emptied the class with whispers and shaking their heads. He stood flustered and headed to his teacher with his head down.
"You have been sleeping in class a lot lately. Is there something you want to tell me?"
"Um…"
"Have you been staying up? Playing game late? Not sleeping enough?"
His teacher interrogated and he tightened his hold on his strap.
"I ask for your forgiveness, teacher. I sleep enough, but I just feel more tired lately."
"Is it your heart again?"
The concerned from his teacher made him smile.
"Thank you for worrying, teacher. I am alright."
"You know that is why I do not wake you up when you snore away sleep talking about your fantasized lover," she said it casually and Bai Lan flushed deeply.
'Sleep talking again? How embarrassing,' he wanted to cover his face.
"Be sure to rest enough, Bai Lan. You can't keep sleeping your life away. It isn't good for your heart."
He blinked at her and she sighed.
"Bai Lan, you have been having a hard time focusing, finishing your task, even socializing with others. I know you had to be out a lot due to your condition, but that should not stop you from making friends."
He nodded and bowed.
"Please forgive me, teacher. I understand."
"Eh? Why do you always speak so formally," his teacher waved him away, "Just take care of yourself."
He offered a smile and she waved him away. Walking out of the classroom, he could hear the whispers as he headed out of the school.
"Don't you think he came back to soon? Didn't he had a scare last week?"
"Yeah. Last time he was gone for a month."
"It was scary! I thought he died."
"Shh, stop being so loud. He is just right there."
"I feel bad for him."
"Me too."
Ignoring the comments he received every time he returned to school, he clutched his heart and walked quickly out of the schoolyard. His heart was racing and he clenched his teeth. When he felt the cool air from outside against his face, he inhaled deeply. Eyes were on him, watching him with wary and worry.
'They think… they think I would just fall over again,' Bai Lan held his satchel's strap tighter and left avoiding everyone.
He kept his head down with his focus on the safety of his home, the comfort of his room. He just wanted to sleep, dream about the only man who cared about him. The only one who said he loved him, wanted to be with him, and wanted to hold him.
He pulled out the key from his pocket and opened the door to his house.
He saw his adopted mother grabbing her purse and turned to him.
"You're back early," she stated grabbing her keys for her car, "I need to run to the store, come with me."
"Can I just stay home? I don't feel well."
Bai Lan looked down with his eyes watery. He hated how his life was. Why did he had to have a bad heart? He thinned his lips and looked at his adopted mother. She frowned deeply and shook her head.
"Fine. If you have issues, be sure to call."
"I know. I've known since you adopted me," he sighed and heard her huff before she left the house.
Dropping his bag, he laid on his bed staring at the ceiling. Since he was a child, he could not remember who his real parents were. All he knew was that he was passed around from family to family. Some were great, others weren't. Once they realized they could not handle his heart condition, he was always brought back.
Now adopted into an older couple's family, he was free to be independent. He was able to be alone and sleep all day if he wanted to. But this couple would always scream at one another. They did not give him hugs or asked about his days.
They were cold when he was needing warmth.
Letting out a sigh, he turned on his side and curled into himself. His mind drifted to the man that made him feel safe. Smiling, he relaxed his muscles and welcomed sleep.
[He felt fingers stroking his face lightly as it trailed down the curve of his neck. Fingernails scrapped lightly down his nape and he shivered opening his eyes. A blurry image of his dream lover was lying beside him in a luxurious bed. His eyes trailed down to see his lover's almost bare chest. The red robe slipped down strong shoulders, revealing firm muscled arms.
"Are you enjoying yourself?"
His eyes snapped back to the blurry face before him and he wanted to hide his face.
"I… I didn't… Uh…"
He heard the chuckle from the man and felt fingers wrapped around his. His hand was lifted to place on smooth skin. He felt as if his heart was going to give up on him at any moment as his palm pressed against the heat of skin. The man glided his hand down long neck and paused where he could feel the beating organ of his infatuation.
They've never… gone this far before in his dreams. They would kiss lightly, hold one another, but this was… this was-
"I miss you."
His eyes returned to the blurry face and he bit his bottom lip.
"I miss you too."
He licked his lips when the man moved in closer, squishing his hand in between their bodies. Breath fanned over his face and he fluttered his lashes as his eyes moved to where lips were on the blurred face.
"It is time," Lips touched all over his face and his heart was beating faster, "Be with me, my love."
"Yes," he breathed back and felt lips on his. His eyes closed and felt the deepening of the kiss, as tongue licked his lips for entrance. He parted his lips and sighed when his dream lover's arm pulled him in closer. His heart was beating with excitement and anxiousness because he knew what was coming next.
It should frighten him, but he was relaxed and happy.
He wanted to stay here with his lover forever if he could. He felt the bed at his back and a palm on his chest. The man pulled away to stare at him and Bai Lan was panting with a smile.
"Do not be afraid, my love."
"Afraid?" He questioned before he felt the palm on his chest push harder.
Gasping, he tried to pull away but his infatuation continue to put pressure against his chest. It was hurting and he wondered if this dream became a nightmare. He did not feel safe, he was scared, and he just wanted to wake up.
"Please!" He wheezed out and the man lightened the pressure as tears slipped down his eyes.
"I love you. Come back to me."
Bai Lan stared at the blurry face and heard the confession from the warped voice.
"You… you scared me," he hiccupped wiping his eyes.
He felt kisses on his face and then on his lips, soft and featherlight.
"Forgive me, beloved."
Bai Lan nodded and closed his eyes as his infatuation leaned down again to kiss him.]
When he opened his eyes, his chest was hurting and tears slipped down his cheeks. Sitting up, he rubbed his chest with a grimace. He can hear his heart beating irregularly and the quicken breath told him it was happening again.
He was having an episode.
He went into his bag, digging with low oxygen brain, trying to find his phone. In his rush to grab the item, he fell off the bed. Gasping what little air he could, he finally caught his phone in his hands. Pulling it out, he tried to press the right number but he wheezed out faint breaths.
He felt his heart constricting and he gripped it tightly. He could feel it giving out and he closed his eyes as he laid down on his side. Bai Lan should have known this was his fate. He should have been prepared, had his phone ready, but he didn't.
Now lying on the floor with his heartbeat slowing down and the phone a stretch away from his hand, he stared at the ceiling. He thought about his adopted parents finding him in his room dead. Would they cry? Would they be happy he was gone?
His mind went to his infatuation, his dream lover. That was the last time he would see the man in red, the beautiful person who ever truly loved him.
'I am sorry. Please forgive me,' he thought as his eyes felt heavy and his vision blurred. He would not meet him anymore. He would not be able to find out who his dream lover was.
As his heart began to stop and his eyes refused to open, he swore he felt fingers running through his hair and the smell of plum blossoms around him.
Then there was silence.
The smell of roses filled his nose and he opened his eyes. He took in the lavished room he was in. The ceiling was not white like his room and the bedsheet over him felt like silk instead of cotton. His head moved to his left to see a girl and he jumped out of the bed in shock.
'Who is this!' He looked down at himself to see him still dressed in… something, 'What is going on? Is this… is he being punished?!'
He quickly went to the door looking for a knob but saw no handle. He heard the bed move and he panicked.
'How do you open this thing!' He was pushing against it and realized it was a sliding door.
"Honey, wha-"
He heard the girl say, but he was not staying to hearing it all. He ran out, down the hallway, and out the big doors with handles.
"Where… where am I," he whispered out loud taking in everything.
He was no longer home.