"Waah… this feels good." I said as I relaxed in the hot spring.
After dinner, we came back directly to our hotel room to relax in the hot spring.
"Yeah, it does. It feels like all the fatigue is being healed." Skyler said.
"You must have been busy last year." I commented.
"Yeah. I couldn't even find time to sleep some days." He complained.
"And yet you find time to fly here." I said.
"This and that are different. Work is tiring but seeing you is healing." He said and winked.
"Okay~" I said as I rolled my eyes to him.
"How about you?" He asked.
"Same old same old." I replied.
"Do you like what you're doing?" He suddenly asked.
"Yeah. I do." I replied after some thought.
"Then how come you don't have enthusiasm about it?" He asked curiously.
"I… I don't know. I like what I do though I can't say I love it. It puts food on my table." I explained.
"What made you become a... what exactly do you do again?" He asked.
"I'm a programmer, to be exact, I'm a .net developer. What made me become one? My friend told me he was taking computer science so I decided to join him and my parents also told me so. I don't have anything I like exactly and I can't think of what I want to be in the future so I just followed him." I explained.
"Hmm… friend? Are you sure he's just a friend?" He asked curiously.
"Yeah, he's more like a brother to me." I explained and laughed.
"I mean you followed him." He tried to explain.
"Yeah because I was scared to go to university alone. As you can see, I'm not the most friendly person ever. I'm very shy." I explained.
"It does make me wonder how you got the guts to go to a bar by yourself that night." He commented.
"I was in a very stressful moment, well, I still am but I guess it is more manageable now." I explained.
"Since we know more about each other now. Why don't you share what happened? Maybe I can, I don't know, help?" He asked.
"Hmmm… I'd like to think that I'm an achiever kind of person. I worked hard back in university to get to work in country X. I did get to work there. It lasted for a year before I decided to go back home. I was so stressed back then. I was a fresh grad, I barely knew what I'm doing. My boss was always mad at me. I keep making mistakes. I… I thought I was good enough but I guess I wasn't and that thought kinda hurt. I returned home and felt like I was a failure." I explained.
I still feel that way.
"I worked in my home country. I was shocked with the difference in the work culture but in my home country, I was considered good enough. I honestly don't know if I was really good enough or they're just being kind to me or they just really didn't expect anything from me." I continued.
Skyler was silently listening to my story.
"Anyway, I still did my best with work but it got really boring. My work in country X is different from my work in my home country. Even though it was tough in country X, I like what I do there. I like writing codes, I like solving problems. It gets stressful but it is satisfying when you solve it. My work in my home country was not like that. It was not challenging enough. After a year and a half of working like that, I lost my motivation to work. That's the time I received a call from my current company. I was scared at first to try working in another country. I was scared that I was not good enough. I was scared that I might end up going home again and feel like a failure." I explained.
"What made you decide to come here then?" He asked.
"I don't like the me that I was becoming. I think that I can do better than what I do there so I gathered my courage and accepted the job here. The company here was really not that bad. Like I said, I like what I do but I don't love it. After almost 2 years of working here, the work becomes a routine. I mean they're not exactly the same but it's repetitive. It feels like I'm stuck in an endless cycle." I explained.
"Then I started questioning myself, am I going to do this forever? Am I going to stay here forever? Is this how my life would be? I got scared with those questions because the only answer I can think of is yes, this is what I'll be doing for the rest of my life and I felt trapped. So I decided to file a leave and go to the nearest bar and drink my troubles away, or so I thought." I explained.
"And then you end up sleeping with the man you met there." He continued and he smiled at me.
"Yes, and my boss called me the following morning to go to the office to get scolded for a problem that I didn't create and when it was found that it wasn't my fault I didn't even get an apology. My day off was wasted and I got scolded for nothing." I complained.
"Wow. I didn't know that's what happened next. I was just shocked when I woke up without you there and then I saw the note you left with the money to pay the hotel. I honestly thought you were paying me for my service." He complained too.
"I honestly never thought I would do something like that. Don't get me wrong I didn't regret it. It was somewhat freeing. You know, doing something new for a change. Doing something outside my routine. It was my first time doing something like that." I told him.
"I know it's your first time. I was the one you slept with that night." He replied slyly.
"Not that but yeah I guess that too. But what I meant was doing something outside my routine. Outside from going to work and then going home." I explained while blushing.
"I'm glad you didn't regret it. I actually thought you did." He said sadly.
"And yet, you still came here and found me." I said.
"I'm persistent. I mean what's the worst that could happen? You'd deny everything? I'll just help you remember it then." He said evilly.
"It's a good thing I didn't forget then." I said.
"Yep." He answered and we both smiled at each other.
I feel giddy. It's really easy to talk to him.
"So… what do you plan now? I mean for your future?" He asked.
"I still don't know. I still can't see the light at the end of the tunnel." I replied sadly.
"Then let's find that light at the end of the tunnel. I'll be here with you until you can find it." He stated.
"Don't I get the choice of not bringing you with me?" I asked playfully.
"Nope. No, you don't. I'm already invested in this. We'll find that light." He said.
"Well, you're not a bad company." I said.
"I'm an awesome company." He replied and we both laughed.
"You look really pretty when you laugh." He said.
"So how many girls have you told that?" I asked playfully.
"I'm not the type to praise random girls, you know." He said and rolled his eyes.
"You actually seem that type." I said.
"Wow and here I thought you already knew me well." He said and pretended to be hurt.
"I've known you for almost a year and met you 4 times in that span of time. I must really know you well." I said flatly.
"You already saw me naked. That's more than most people." He replied.
"Oh my God." I exclaimed before I splashed him water.
Does he really have to talk about naked bodies right now when he's showing his toned body right in front of me?
"What? It's true." He said and laughed.
I don't know how to respond to that. All I knew was my face must have been really red by now.
"You're so cute, Fay." He teased me.
"Shut up. You're bullying me now." I said.
"I'm not. You are really cute and I'm honestly glad I'm one of the few people who can see this side of you." He said.
"What made you sure that only a few people saw me like this?" I asked curiously.
"You don't leave your house. I told you if you actually go out, guys would line up to get to know you." He said.
"You think too highly of me." I replied.
"And you think lowly of yourself. You don't see the beautiful girl I see in front of me." He retorted.
"You need to get your eyes checked." I said.