"Hijo" I woke up to my mother calling and knocking on my door. I laid in my bed with the covers pulled over my head surprised that my mother didn't just walk in. I sat up in my bed.
"Come in Ma" I straightened myself up in the bed.
"¿Por qué estás todavia en la cama? Hora de levantarse." My mother asked in Spanish. She refused to speak English if she didn't' have to, she always says "I learned English because I am in America but that doesn't mean my language is dead and you will know your native language" this is something she drilled in me since I was young. Sometimes I even caught myself speaking Spanish to people who don't speak it, I will say it does help with the ladies.
"Ma not everyone is an early riser like you, plus I don't have practice this morning so I wanted to sleep in."
"How often do I come here? Don't you think that you should take me out? I am surprised that you slept alone." Here we go she never stops.
"I will take you out Ma, but don't start on the women I mess with." I got out if bed and headed to the shower. I loved my mom and it was always best to walk away because she never stopped. I got in the shower and the hot water felt amazing. My mind drifted to the woman from yesterday 'Melanie' I think her name is. The sex was good but for some reason she stuck in my head. I know it wasn't the sex because I had better sex from hotter women. It was her personality, the way she said what she felt yesterday was a turn on, sad but it was. I got out of the shower and did my morning routine of brushing my teeth and cleaning my face. I could hear movement in my room which meant that my mom was most likely cleaning my room/ IK don't care how many housekeepers I have she will still clean. I didn't raise you to have other people clean after you, I didn't even clean after you once you were old enough to walk so I know you can clean after yourself. My mom is Latina so she lives by cleanliness is next to Godliness. I walked out of the bathroom and pass my mom plugging in then vacuum cleaner. I walked by her shaking my head. I loved my mom to death but she is a trip she lives by the rules of Maria. Maria Ramirez lived by her own rules. As I am getting dressed I hear another voice.
"Maria…" yells Joanne.
"Joanne…" my mom yells back. I didn't even have to be in the room to know that they were hugging.
"Maria, you know your son pays someone to do this. I tell you this every time you come here."
"Jo, you know I hate feeling useless and sitting around. And since I know he can hear me, Anthony acts like he can't even clean up his room." I walked out of the closet fully dressed. Both women were sitting on the sofa in the sitting area of my room.
"I love you too Ma. I keep telling you I don't have time to clean with practice."
"You have time to wine and dine a different woman every night of the week, then you can take the time to clean up at least your room."
"I tell him about the women he chooses to bring home all the time. He is going to bring more than a woman home one of these days if he keeps it up." Now I had both of them going on about my love life at the same time. It was like they shared a brain when it came to having an opinion about my love life. I am my mothers' only child she is understandable but Joanne had three grown kids who were happily married with families of their own so she should be satisfied with the number of grandkids and in laws she already had, but no she is trying to marry me off.
"This is not about to be a let's gang up on Anthony day. I am dressed so let's go to breakfast. Joanne you are more than welcome to join us." I grabbed my keys from the dresser and headed out of my room. As I leave I hear my mom say something in Sspanish.
"él aprenderá un día, espero" one day he will learn, I hope is what she said.
"He will don't worry; my Bobby was the same way and now he is married with two kids and one on the way"
"From your mouth to Gods ears."
We ended up having breakfast at a local diner about an hour from my house. My mom mostly ate Hispanic food but when it came to breakfast she loved pancakes, and eggs. Joanne didn't join us, she said that this was time I needed to spend with my mom just the two of us. Although my mom cold be pushy sometime, I have to say I loved this time I spent with her, I am still her little boy at hearty. I would do anything for my mother, this woman has raised me on her own and work herself to the bone to make sure I had what I needed and even got me through college.
"So, when do you think you're coming to visit home?" My mom asked breaking me from my thoughts.
"What is left for me to visit there? All I have is you and you come here."
"Don't be so cynical, hijo. You have old friends and family that still live in Connecticut. In am sure some of your aunts, uncles, and cousins would like to see you."
"Whenever I see them they all have their hands out. The only person I can say I miss is tiá Sophia." Tiá Sophia was my mothers' older sister. She had three boys and one girl all who she raised on her own when her husband was killed. She kept me while my mom worked when I was growing up. I was really close to her boys but after I got drafted we drifted apart, everyone started their own family. The only one I really talked to regularly is Jennifer, she is the baby and the only girl. My mom has one brother but I don't really know him because he got deported before I was born. I had family on my dad side but since he has never wanted to be in my life I never really socialized with them. Almost anyone besides the few on my mom side always wanted something. I usually got my aunts kids to come see me during the season because they would come watch me at my games. All except my little cousin Jennifer, she just came to shop, she hated sports and refused to come to my games, she was always there to support me after but said she was not about to torture herself by sitting through a game. \
"Sometimes that's what families do when they think you have it. You see what always happens when I go back to Puerto Rico. I always taught you when you in a good place it is always good to help others."
"I understand that ma, but these are people who I never heard anything from before I got drafted."
"Okay, I know you're going to do what you want to do. If I gave you nothing else I gave you the gift of being stubborn. I know if you don't want to come back home you won't. You haven't been back in a while. You don't even know what the house that you brought me looks like. Your running and you don't want to admit it. You think that I haven't noticed that you've been reluctant to come home since college, since you and Chanaé broke up. Yo no soy ciego."
"I know you're not blind ma, although sometimes I wish you were. It would have made getting away with things while I was growing up a lot easier." I laughed.
"There are other women out there. You will fall in love again. There is also very little chance that you will even run into her again I haven't seen her in years. She may have even moved away for all you know."
"I don't want to fall in love. Maybe I am avoiding seeing her but if it will make you happy I will go back with you and spend a few weeks since we will be on vacation." My mom screamed, drawing attention from other patrons.
"Oh, Dios mío. I thought I was going to have to guilt trip you into coming to home."
"I wouldn't put guilt tripping me pass you, but I figured I would save you the breath since you were going to keep going until you got me to say I would come."
"Aww mi amour. You know I love you." It's funny how she turns sweet once she gets her way. When I think about it my mom is right what are the chances that I will run into Chanaé, when we were together she always said that she wanted to move down south so chances are she is long gone from Connecticut.
"There's no need to go all sweet mama on me. You already got your way, I am coming home. Just so that you'll know I expect a home cooked meal the whole time I am there."
"You get a home cooked meal here. Joanne cooks for you and I know it's every day you get a home cooked meal because we talk almost every day and she lets me know what's going on with you."
"I know but I do miss your cooking. Joanne is a great cook but there are some things that only you can make. I knew you and Joanne talked but every day. What can you possibly talk about every day?"
"You, life, her kids, and grandkids. I actually was surprised that you hired some0one so much like me to be with you every day."
"Of course, I did. I had to, you refused to move to California. Joanne is the closest thing to you I could find. I still wish you would move here it would be great to have you around all the time. I miss being able to see you when I want to."
"If I moved here what would I do with that big house you brought me?"
"You can keep it for when you visit, and if I knew you were going to use it as an excuse not to move I would never have brought you one in Connecticut."
"Hijo, you know I don't want to leave my job and plus I like my house. Maybe when it's time to retire we can revisit this conversation, plus you may not always play for this team. Am I supposed to move every time you move teams?"
"No, but is it wrong I want my mom, who is single and basically alone, to be close to me?"
"No, it's not but if you had a family of your own you would worry less about me."
"Why, oh why does every conversation lead to this?"
"You know what will stop this conversation from coming up?"
"What Ma?" I know way ever is about to come out of her mouth was something I do not want to hear.
'If you actually settle down then I will leave the subject alone. I keep telling that there is a woman out there for you. When you meet her you will forget about Chanaé, and build a life and family with her. You have to be open to it though hijo. Your life didn't end with High school, look at you now you have the football career that you wanted. You have no room for regrets." She always came back to me building a family. I know it might sound crazy but I didn't want to build a family anymore. I don't know why I used to think about kids and marriage with Chanaé all the time, I was actually going to wait until she graduated to ask her to marry me. I think back and wonder what was wrong with our relationship and I know I should have listened to her about Sherri, I will forever regret that. I just can't help but think in the back of my head that there has to be something more. I don't want to believe that she didn't love me but that's why I won't do any more relationships, because you never truly know how someone feels about you so my way of life is safe.
"Ma, un día, one day. Right now, I am still in my twenties so I am not in a rush. I promise that you will get your grandkids."
"Well I am holding you to that. Are you sure everything down there is working?" Wait why does she have no boundaries.
"Yes, ma everything works okay. You know what we are about to end this conversation right now. I am not talking to my mother about my sex life."
"You are such a prude. You do know I had to have sex to make you right?"
"Yes, I know, doesn't mean I want to think about you having relations with anyone let alone that deadbeat sperm donor."
"You know I hate when you bad mouth your father. Whether you want to think about it or not I needed him to have you, and he is a part of you. No, he isn't perfect, no he has never been there for you but I love you with my whole heart so there is no room for him anyway. I am just thankful to him for being fertile enough to give me you." My father leaving before I was born never bothered me because my mom always made sure I had the best of everything. José Ramirez was just a sperm donor who last name My mom and me shared. It always surprised me that she didn't talk bad about him. I once heard her tell my tía Sophia that he had a new family and she hoped he was happy. My parents never married the strangest thing was my dad and mom met and dated but shared the same last name which made it easy for my mom because she always wanted to share the same last name as her child. José was mixed his mom Black and dad Puerto Rican, He had more features of his mom that's why most people thought he was Black or at least Dominican.
"Okay, I know. I am sorry if I upset you. Can I ask a question though?"
"Sure hijo, you know you can ask me anything."
"Are you still in love with José?" I watched to see if she showed any sign of a yes before she answered. I always hoped that it wasn't love, or any other good feeling that she had towards him.
"No, it isn't love. This is what I always tell you, there is love after your first love. I tell you this from experience, no perder el aliento."
"I don't think you do it to waste your breath ma, I just always hoped that you didn't still love a mom who left you pregnant. You raised me not to do that to women so I would hope that you wouldn't love a man to do the exact opposite off what you taught me."
"No, Although I did love him and he was my first, I have loved others, but the one true love I have had is you. Hijo, there is no love like the love you carry for a child. This is why I want you to have a family not for me but for you. I know you think you hid it well and you were young but I saw what the loss of Chanaé did to you. At first, I just thought you were just being a teenager but I watched and I saw how you were yourself less and less. I know that feeling I had and then you were born, and that feeling became nonexistent. I hate seeing you void of emotion like you are. Its lie all you care about is me, and I know you hate to hear this hijo but I am not going to be around forever." Hearing my mom talk like this made me regret asking the question but maybe she was right. I have been thinking about the girl from the other night a lot, Melanie, maybe I will give her a call and see if she actually wants to go on a real date. Hopefully I have her number saved if not I believe I called her the night we met to tell her where to meet me so no one can see it.
"Okay ma, I will tell you this I am not promising but I will keep an open mind."
"That's all I ask for, hijo." She was smiling from ear to ear.
"No, it's not but we will leave it. Are you ready to go?"
"Sure." I paid the bill and we were on our way.