(LOOKING FOR YOU IN THE EYES)
"HEY, SAY!"
Everybody screams on top of their lungs as the smokescreen makes a thunder fog effect, the lights go dim, and the crimson spotlights with a mixture of blue and green neon lights dance their way up into the last stage.
"Miyu!" as they cheer, the people who made me who I am today, the strangers that I never meet before, but I could reach through my songs.
"Please, let me find him." As I whisper to the heavens hoping that it could reach the person I never intended to have. By which destiny is cruel enough to my life, and fate set a different path for me. And now here I am, the person who everyone loves and idolizes, adored by many, and owning the fame for five years now.
This spotlight, my songs, the name, and affection they all bring, there is only one thing that led me to this path, and that is to find the person in this reincarnated 3rd chance of a life of ours, to finally be with each other even if it means the last, from the sin that we need to pay.
"Te Amo!" I greeted, waving my hand as I went in the center stage, rocking the melody I jive with the song.
As they all scream in full support and glee on top of their lungs, waving their light sticks, banners, and pictures of me. The life I strive in this life to hold kept and will never let go, not until he will finally hear my voice and recognize my call. To reach him on the highest pedestal of this fame identity, I dwell into this scene and life to be with him. To have a little care and chance to fulfill that promise.
"One, two, three!" they count with me as the smokes faded and the lights dance gently, dimming out with the spotlight that traces unto me. Stopping for a second as the beat strums to the song, I started.
"Everybody!" as I began singing. To the vast echo of the sound that fills the arena, everyone jives with me, singing in tone as the others dance with the night of their lives.
The song that took their heart, the words I wanted for him to hear, I conveyed, and hope to be understood, rings the ever-wanted promise we both took. But the deal rips us apart, to the wants and greed of our souls that we took in a gamble, in exchange for a short romance is the game I wanted to regret, yet I cannot blame.
The shadow that I knew but forgot, the smile that I own, but I let it vanishes, the boy I met in that time in that life, the one I promise to be with, and the one that I always find forgetting and letting something die from deep inside? With the contract that we both took and the consequence of the game we play, and against is all, but the hunting reality we need to pay with the price, this time in this life, as our third and last chance. Everything should be as it all will be, a spin of a tragic tale of our Romeo and Juliet.
"I will make you remember everything even if it means that I need to dwell in pain and agony for missing you. I swear to be the one who will keep you safe, in this life and to the next, up until the last chance."
Hearing back his words, from those painful promises that created the cog that spins the dark, cruel, and exchanged fate, we are running in circles. I wanted to be the one who will let him remember everything, as I want to be the one that will hold him again, in the third chance of our life.
"Do we have a deal, Miyu?"
Owning back and hearing those words from the devil that I picture perfectly with its eyes, stand, and the gentlemen in every way, and the spiteful trickster who hunts us from the very beginning as the playwright of the play we took. His uncanny smile and evil want making me want to regret everything, yet I should not, as I cannot. For the desire to be with him, I cannot give up against the trick that was long laid out for both of us, as I swear to be the one to make him remember this time, even if it will end in an inevitable sacrifice.
"Miyu!" they call, slowly waving their hands as my next song tone down with the melody they all are familiar with, knowing the half-truth of my search, the longing and wants I used to put me on this pedestal. Maybe it is wrong to use people out of their sympathy from the feeling that love could bring, yet I took the stake to be a little closer to him.
"Here it goes." I introduce as the lights dim once more, and as I sat in the center stage, the bright spotlight is on me as the rhythm plays.
With the world knowing the fantasy, others believe it to be a lie, to the destiny that is neither cruel nor good for us, the choice we made, and the deal that took everything in this third spin and chance, I will hold to the thing that I know off.
"Three years, 12 hours, 35 minutes, and 30 seconds until that day!"
They all chanted together with me, as they all remember, from which that promise holds up until the time that we will fulfill it.
Taking a deep breath as I close my eyes once in a second and two, I said. "This song is what I made for the most special person in my life." I draw a smile together with my heart that beats its genuine misses, for the angel without wings. I took a deep breath in while I added with the confession.
"The person I forget and never intend to, the one who owns my life."
To the words of my past that mark the longing I suffer for long. From the vivid scene of him and I, my heart strum the familiar melody. Swoon by the promise, and taken by the pain, the stupidity others branded of me for believing in a fantasy that will never come true. If only they knew, if only I can let them see, my heart, my existence, and the very me is the twist of cruel fate and wants from the lives we both are chasing after for one another.
Chances, hate, regret, promise, and love, I shall hold on to this thing, as this is the fact I will live forever. Until that time comes, to the tragic end of the contract we both signed for, in this lifetime, I will be his Juliet as he is my Romeo.
Taking a deep breath as the play of Romeo and Juliet is laid upon me, I smile once more as I said. "This song is for the person who gave up everything from a deal of a lifetime. I entitled this song 'A Time.'
To the solemn melody that strums louder, I sing the song.
I should have walked away, ignored the heart that is you
And pretend that I did not hear
I wish I should not fall for you
I should have wished, that the past is not you
I should have run away, close my eyes away from you
Pretend that I did not see
I wish I did not know you
I should have long for someone else
A time I knew what is love
A time I knew I give in to love,
You let me felt this thing loving you
But then you left me all alone
A time you were my world
A time you left me all alone
I don't know what to do to keep missing you
As the words could only say, I will keep waiting for you
I should not have stayed
This pain would never mend
I should not have hope for you
I should have held you tight
My heart would not be like this
I should not have smiled at you
And promised nothing
Now I am all alone
Wishing you to come back
I wish I could turn back the time
A time I knew what is love
A time I knew I give in to love,
You let me felt this thing loving you
But then you left me all alone
I should not look at you
My heart will never mend
I should have wait
And now I kept missing you
I should have walked away, ignored the heart that is you
And pretend that I did not hear
I wish I should not fall for you
I should have long that past is not you
I should have run away, close my eyes away from you
Pretend that I did not see
I wish I did not know you
I should have wished for someone else
A time I knew what is love
A time I knew I give in to love,
You let me felt this thing loving you
But then you left me all alone
A time you were my world
A time you left me all alone
I do not know what to do to keep missing you
As the words could only say, I will keep waiting for you
I should not have stayed
This pain would never mend
I should not have hope for you
I should have held you tight
My heart would not be like this
I should not have smiled at you
And promised nothing
Now I am all alone
Wanted you to come back
I wish I could turn back the time
A time I knew what is love
A time I knew I give in to love,
You let me felt this thing loving you
But then you left me all alone
A time you were my world
A time you left me all alone
I don't know what to do to keep missing you
As the words could only say, I will keep waiting for you
I wish I did not see
And this pain would never be
I should not have found you
I wish I could turn back the time
I long that you are still with me.
Ending the melody as my heart flutter in the mix of pain, wanting, and longing, my tear falls as the words came back with the hurtful promises and almost empty hope I still and forever will hold until we could be together again, not by the chance of the deal nor the fate of our hearts in this play as the actors and actresses. But the final call as the curtains will fall and the tragic ending will be the happy ever after.
'I CAN GO BACK, RIGHT?'
'WHY WOULD YOU WANT IT TO BE, FOR SOMEONE AND SOMETHING THAT IS BEYOND THE REASON OF THE HUMAN WORLD THAT YOU LIVE IN?'
'HUMAN OR NOT, MORTAL OR IMMORTAL AND A KING OF THE FOREST, NO MATTER WHAT, YOU ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN MY LIFE.'
'IF YOU WOULD NOT AND FOR NOTHING, IF IT IS FOR ME, WOULD YOU?'
'I PROMISE.'
The angel I should have taken a sight to, the heart that I should have ignored, and the greed that took us in this game. The promise and a love that started everything. The past I treasure the most and the past that I can no longer go back into or rewind everything. The one I knew back then, the first person who ever calls my name. The first and only person I would ever love. For after this third life I have, I will be the one to remember him first, the one that will make him remember, the one that will say those words first, and the one I treasure the most.
"Rafael!"