(STAY)
IF saying goodbye is the easiest thing to do in the human realm, it will never be for me. The day that she came into my life, the gate that she opens accidentally, the world where I hide for eternity opens, shaken, and the King that should guard everything of that kingdom falls to the human that I call, "Miyu." As I keep calling her name in a whisper, engraving every letter as I could, I should, and I wanted forever.
Sitting at the edge of her window sill, with the wind blowing gently, making the curtains sways from the inside. I watched her asleep as my urges wanted me to step a bit closer and fall to her side. Taking a breath, I reason, whispering, "Everything is all for you, Miyu." Closing my eyes as I blow that wish, I look back at the full moon from above with my smile that draws the words that will either curse or make everything for the both of us. With my selfish heart that grows over time, my subconsciousness is screaming that I do not want to regret, as I do not want to fail. For I just wanted one thing.
Glancing back at her for one more time, I call with the words saying, "I'll promise to be back for you." As I bid my temporary goodbye, jumping way up ahead from the heights landing swiftly down on the grass and without making a sound. I took the steps into the dark path that paves the only for me.
'Can I stay?'
To the words that are echoing back unto my mind, the image that is knocking every bit of tragedy for my life. The reality that I wanted to erase and forget but the truth that hunts me the day when I fall and deep for the mortal that I shouldn't have. I wanted to stay and be with her every second of each day, but how would I do such a thing if it means I will break her heart?
"Heaven and hell, mortal and guardian, just which one will bring the much greater grief?" I asked myself as my steps are getting nearer and nearer to the intended game that I decided to take. Inside the forest and the path that could only open for those who wanted to take the risk in exchange for a soul, a road for a deal that no one could turn back. But in my case, I wanted a real one, a body that I could call mine, a mortal to be in exchange for what's left divinity inside of me.
"Cursed, punishment, and a taboo, you chose this yourself, Rafael." I often wonder as I keep on uttering the words that beat the warning of forever be bound into an eternity of zilch and suffering. But the love I have for her is much stronger than anything that this world could give, much more than the heavens plan and hell's pride and rule could condemn me, and much more of the wants that push me in this place. For the truth will always knock the path that I've chosen then, the guardian that was I then was already fallen to the mortal that I should protect.
'You wouldn't regret this, right?'
Holding the thoughts and the warning from the Seraphim who tried to knock the sense out of me before, her words and wanting regret for me didn't stop everything inevitable and planned from the very beginning. Choosing the latter path from the easy one is the bumpy and rocky road I am dwelling on now. I wanted to scream and blame everything, fate, destiny, eternity, and the heavens, for what my life ended up into. Why would they let me have the impossible thing that I couldn't have? Why would they let me believe that something will always bound my life into nothing but me and let her promise for the only thing now that I don't want, but they gave?
'Rafael, which means the fairy king of the sun, the king's son, Rafael.'
Recalling the past, those innocent smiles, and the words that draw me near to her where I should not be. Watching her grow up in my sight and carefully falling in love, and too late to realize or stop my heart from beating for the taboo that is falling in love with a mortal. My cursed life and my punishment from the angel who made the greatest mistake end up and falls from eternity to guard that unknown place. To be someone no one is there, to be alone and be a trap with no emotion, yet her smile, her voice, those silver-grey eyes she owns, her silky black hair that matches her pinkish cheeks and with a gentle, but warm smile, changes everything of my unknown life. Is she the punishment that I needed to suffer from, the mortal that with a cruelties exchange, was my paid mistakes, then I regret everything, as I hate myself that I become, begging the heavens to please hear me out, to please give me a chance, for I fall deeply for the human that I call,
'I LOVE YOU, MIYU.'
Whispering those words, as I remember that moment where I was defeated once more by the emotion that I should not bear, worst of luck to the same mortal from her first life, and I am as her guardian.
I hate my life, this heart, and the person who is me, who loves her this much. More than the past and that once angel that is me, for now, as I look ahead and the final trees that open that path for me, the place that no one should dare to go, seek and wish for is the dark alley I will once again take. The former me then, a guardian who knew everything and should not trust or even dwell from within the forbidden thing we need to abide. Yet, here I am taking the final step as I look at the grandest mansion of the demon with his tricked title.
"I'm here." Calling his presence as I made known mine, the crows sing their melody to call, as the moon slowly turning to its red hue of blood and the door opens with the gentlemen in every way greeted me with a cunning smile.
"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" marking his devil's aura as he took his hat off, bowing in a gentleman's fashion, his words echo winding in a circular patter upon his territory.
To the demon that I almost signed a contract with then, the trickster that deceives any weaken heart angels to quench his thirst for a greedy passion. The greatest fallen perfect angel, I will finally gamble for the mortal that by twice and definitely with my cursed existence drag me once again and down.
"You know what I came here for." I firmly held my resolve, answering his impending question syncing my subconsciousness unto him as he is to mine. For the exchange life that I wanted to have, the deal of a hundred days, and to win against the pain and longing is all for her, all to be near her, as selfish it may sound, but I will endure everything, anything as I will surely win this time, for my love, for her heart, and our love to last, forever.
With a grin on his demon's face, then turning into a sinister laugh, he screams. "Finally!" holding his excitement in as his flustered face seeks the hunger for the price to be paid, he held his hand, welcoming me in return. "Shall we?" Winning against time as his sinister laugh echoed in the forbidden cage I dare to dwell into. The law that was left for me to hang on to, the chance that I defy the second I set foot in his stage for the second time, and finally the time to exchange. I sat quietly, but determined down, to have the deal of a lifetime's exchange.
Smiling winningly as I took the favor now sitting across him, as his eyes flushed the sparkling reminder of the past he utters. "Strengthen by affection, but debilitate by love. I knew you will seek of me once again, but this time it's not the same as the last, but first, welcome back to my palace ex-Guardian Angel, Rafael." As he calls my name, taking it as a pleasurable tone with the giggle from his greed that he forever seeks from me.
"Tsk!" I smirked, looking at him with disgust and anger. But what could I do? I can't blame the devil for being the only one beyond and almost as equal to the strength of the heavens that can only grant the only thing, I ever want that the heavens forbid. Even if how greatly I envy his sinister smile, wicked tricks, and playful ways, I can't turn my back now as I already draw out my card and broke my silent promise. To bring back the time and undo everything is too late now, as I can't turn away anymore and get back the thump card I already gave. If only I didn't wish for it, didn't remember everything. I want the wish that she made, but what else could I do? I already owned her heart. "Tell me what price you wanted for the thing that I wanted for you to do," I ask cautiously, looking at him without a slight bit of emotion to be read.
Yet, as he pictured a cunning smile in return, my stomach turns to warn the added anger from within, but I firmly held it all in as he temps with his words, "Finally breaking the law? Oops! I mean breaking the law once again, have we, Rafael?" he teases, yet with the knocking winning warning.
Gritting my teeth as his words are ringing the played same old anger within me. Playing tricks and prolonging the intended game was his play. Yet I should abide even though I wanted to break. For he's the only one who can grant the impossible to this world of the fallen that 'He' owned.
Snapping his finger, the contract is written, by a blood flame in the air, he contently lays the words as the pen writes along. "For the same mortal, for the second time, yet for the first and finally once in time, your desire, is my command, Ra-fa-el," as he laughs, making me want to curse, but I knew I shouldn't, for now. "Looked at destiny as you might have asked, isn't it pretty damn nice, that you remember everything and the reason for your sin to exist?" Marking the blame, he proudly speaks off, and the wants that I once had chosen before, forget, bound me to that place to guard for years and now finally remembers. "All because of that smile, to that smile, that one pure smile to the same person who is the root that was her?" Cracking a laugh pinning the dwindling patience I have inside, the long past that I choose to save her went all and come again to my life as I met her in this life. "Your life that revolves in a thousand years of guarding that place, her last third life, the time you wasted and everything that is none then, still waiting now and finally envied in hate, am I not smart, am I?" As he tried to win over flipping the facts upside down and side by side to have all the cards turn into his faced favored play.
"Well, isn't the heaven just too cruel to play their tricks this way?" he started, started again playing with words moving his finger to the desired stroke of every formed letter to words of the contract. "Your eternal punishment, your heart's desire that was a taboo from the very beginning. Your sealed memories as your never-ending price of agony were broken, affixed to shatter by the same destiny who made you gamble this way, or perhaps destiny became my companion. What do you think?" recalling the past with the same words he had then, his cunning smile and the presence of the fault that I am once more dwelling now is hooking the tragedy I will hold at hand.
Creating the puzzling tone that can be the truth and perhaps be the reason behind it. I don't care anymore and everything out from anything at all. For all I ever wanted and is clear to me now is for that wish to come true no matter what.
Tapping his finger as the final words of the contract are being done, he once more smiled saying. "It took long, but here you are, as I guess it, no I knew it, you will come back and for that same wish." he sinisterly smiled confidently stupidly in my eyes.
"Name your price." As I draw the last straw and give up my final trump card, for what could I do, I fell in love with the same human over again, the human I was supposed to care, the human to whom I should guard, yet the very human I fall in love too.
Signing with his finger slowly laying the formed contract in from of me, he then proposed. "Let's play a game. A game of no binderies, but finding each other again, I entitled Love Will Lead You Back. Isn't it exciting don't you think?" hitting the things that he the 'DEMON' plays and is used to, to the game that he wants and the played part I drag myself into, defying the order once again, but worst, running away from my back I played along falling to that endless pit once again. "The price?" he deduces putting a sinister smile within as he added with the menacing words, ''You're divinity, your soul, and everything that you are.'' He contently smiles, giving his hand in a gesture and a choice by which I do not have in the first place. "The game is simple," he started to explain, "Life, death, and reincarnation.'' He hinted, giving the trill I wanted to curse out of him, as he continued, "In this life and time both off you will take a different path, for a second chance, both humans, both mortals, both of you will play my theatre acts, just like Romeo and Juliet."
Ringing the morbid plan that I cannot escape into, I close my eyes to hope only for the worst of the best, but just to be with her, the trick that He's playing is the only escape route to be a mortal equal to her existence.
Snapping his finger as a pen appears and falls perfectly in front of me, laying beside the contract at hand, he smiles with the words,
"Reincarnation, death and rebirth, three chances, three lives spin, three events in time, three hopes and three wishes, that's the script. Take it or leave it. You will be my actors as I am the playwright, from those chances you can choose, but remember I already warn you. In a hundred years, fifty, twenty or best be lucky for, after ten years from now, one of you will remember everything when your destiny once again meets and you realize it. Only if you realize it, but the other will not when that time met, I will only give you twenty, you heard it right twenty years to live. To that time your consequences and named price will tick and will never cease to exist. As the time will start your first chance will begin, to a mortal body in exchange equal by you in appearance and every bit of your existence now, our play will begin. After a hundred days, you both will suffer each other's loss, for months you will meet again as I can finally say, let the game begin." sinisterly laughing at his cursed game at hand, the playing trick he gives ends to our beginning.
Smiling as he waves his hand, paving for the contract that was too tempting to refuse, he added. "One of you knows, remember and forever bares your both hearts, as one of you will do everything for the other one to remember before the time runs out and if not, the one that had a deal with me will die. What's more, to make it more exciting, you cannot tell her all about what lies within the contract, because if you do, death will befall her. All you need to do is make her remember. Twenty years is the time needed? Do we have a deal?" he places the agreement confidently.
With my mind and heart that took my entire resolve for this, and taking this much consequence and price in return is the just one, the back of my heart is screaming that I should not. I know I should not have made that deal to the devil as my subconscious mind is telling me not to, but for her, and to protect her, I will do everything even though defying the rules and dwelling once again on that biggest mistake, of a sin. Taking the pen as I signed the contract sealing with my blood of divinity at hand, I boldly accept.
"Deal."
With the howl of the wolves, the crooks of the crows, and the night that was tainted with blood, his laugh echoes. Taking the contract sealing close vanishing in the dark space, he speaks, "Good luck Rafael until we meet again." As he smiles satisfied into my eyes before he faded and completely vanishes, slowly together with his castle like a cloud of smoke in windy meadows.
Holding the necklace that bears the contract we two made in sign of my blood, to the forest where I could not go back into, and the deal for my life, as I took the steps away and bear the pain of hurting her so much in this lifetime, to that's demon plan for our lives, my tears fall as I picture our deaths.
"NO MATTER WHAT, I WILL BE THE ONE WHO WILL REMEMBER YOU,"
MIYU