I could feel my old man deflating little by little as he heard me read report after report. I did not know when, but my old man appeared by my side looking sad and depressed. Ah, even if he is a stiff bastard, I hated seeing him like this. I was the only one that got to make him depressed. Technically, that was exactly what I was doing but that was not how I wanted to do it. I looked through page after page, praying to him that I at least find one report that was somewhat normal. Just one.
"Here, this god here tried to make the hero of his planet much stronger by forcing him to go through adversaries much more powerful than himself. It worked for a while until he made the demon king way more powerful than the hero. The demon king easily killed the hero and enslaved the whole world. He then proceeds to pluck a mortal from a mortal world, fill him up with cheats and drop him off on that world.
YES! See dad, that was normal, it's not as bad as the others." Finally, I had found one. It was a fuck up, yes, but it was a good fuck up compared to the rest. Looking at my old man he still looked sad. It really was not that bad.
"Keep reading." Dad's sad voice barely audible. Even with my super hearing I could barely hear him.
"The god was having an affair with…" No! I'm not finishing it. I stopped myself and packed up his reports neatly on his desk. That was least I could do. Arrange his table as neatly as I possible could. "Take that one as a win, old man." Patting my old man on the shoulder, I consoled him. I think I understood him a bit now.
There was a bit of awkward silence in the room for a while, but I had a burning question on my mind. I stared at the only sheet of report laying on the table, which, mind you, I had merely forgotten to file like the rest. "So, sector 1884…" My curiosity got the better of me. It was for research purposes. If I did not know what it was then how could I one day become an all-knowing god. That was just common sense.
"You want to see the unconventional video?" The old man said before I could even come up with an excuse for it. He really was my dad after all. An absolute creep.
"You have it?" I asked with a sly smile. Even though I knew the answer, I felt his affirmation would make it even more real.
"Of course, who do you think I am. I had to confiscate the flash drive." Puffing out his chest dad proceeded to play the video and I must be honest; it was exactly as he said it would be. Very…um, unique.
I have never felt both so aroused and disgusted at the same time. I wanted to stop but I seemed to be unable to tear my eyes of the screen. I leaned in to get a closer look and that's when I saw in the reflection of the screen, a transcendent mature beauty that looked mid 30's. She stood with her arms crossed and a large vein bulged on her forehead.
'This is bad. Mother'. OMP. OH MY PAPA. What amazing terrible timing this woman had. It was terrifying how she always ended up behind me every time I was intending on doing something mischievous. It was the same for when I was young. What? I knew I was being bad as a child, but I had to do it. What was the point of godhood if I could not run around doing silly stuff? I was not like those stuck-up gods that felt they had to be gracious and oh so heavenly. WAIT! That was not the point now. I needed to find a way out of the new shit I was in or it was my ass.
"Old man, why are you making me watch this?" I said still pretending to concentrate on the video, but my entire focus was on the reflection. 'I'm sorry dad, I'm going to have you take the fall for this one.' I was almost feeling sorry for what was about to befall my old man. My mother was the demoness of the divine realm. A goddess considered as a demoness!
"What are you talking about son? You went to steal this from sector 1884 and I have to admit it really is as unique as you said it was." What?!? What the fuck are you talking about old man?!? *Gasp* Don't tell me old man, you've already seen her. Looking to the side slightly with just my eyes, I saw a rather foolish grin on my father. I really hated him when he got like that.
He met my eyes, and I could tell what he was thinking. 'Damned brat you are trillions too young to play this game with me. You are going down with me, shitty son!' At glance his foolish grin looked like he was enjoying the video, but I could tell. He was taunting me. The shit old man was taunting me.
'Have the dignity of a higher god and take the fall for the both of us, you damned ugly old man and when the hell did you see her. Wait how long has she been behind us?'
'When you are married as long as I, even without seeing her you can feel the disturbance in the force when she's angry. She has been there since the last 5 seconds into the video. I will get mine but you're going down with me. What dignity of a higher god? Feel her wrath as well, shitty brat. HAHAHAHAH!'
As the mental argument was going on between father and I, I suddenly felt a cold strong hand grip at the back of my head. It was over. 'There goes my escape plan.' I was already sweating buckets when her cold hands grabbed my head. How was that possible? Did gods sweat? I had always wondered. At least I did every time I was caught. What about others. 'I should ask Ruthia, when I see her next. I mean if I see her.'