It's a nice morning, I'm Sorry morning? Mahira it is afternoon, sucker but obviously your lazy dumbass never bothered to get its ass off the bed for a single morning the whole 9 months in lockdown. It's 12 a.m. sharp. It's cold outside, fogs covering the whole sky, I can barely see the sun, or its golden hue, what I see though is layers and layers of fog evolving the matte pale blue sky or gulping it like vanilla milk mocha drink. Hot Vanilla milk mocha drink sounds like heaven to my heart to drink in this cold morning and under these blankets covering me, giving me warmth. I wish I had someone to hug me as a blanket does. I would hug my dad like I usually do to annoy him by hugging him tightly for like minutes straight but he's already off to work.
Because he knows what morning is and has to work his ass off for you while you get to have your ass resting like FOREVER, my conscience added, such a bitch like it has been so much trained staying with my mom for sixteen years that it trained itself to taunt me like her for everything. Lockdown has been stranded for the occasion of Eid and I think that's one of the nicest things that happened in nine months but I'm still stuck at home no matter what.
"Sleepyhead, wake up, wake up already. I'll have to clean the room.", my mom marches inside my room pulling the sheets off me and a gush of wind passes over me sending all my body hair to stand straight. It's COOOLLLLLDDD! I pull the blanket from my mom's hand and wrap it around me.
"It's cold mommy, let me sleep. I'll wake up later."
"No, you wake up right now and go straight for a bath", she pulls the blanket once again from me and turns on all the fans in the room, and leaves laughing. She knows how to get me to do what she wants. "Arghhh", I say frustrated. When she says she will clean my room, you know it is a terrible joke. She never works or does the chores. We have a caretaker who does this work, from making our beds to washing our clothes, so my mom never bothers with these works, except scolding me when she is frustrated or when she wants to taunt me. My dad cooks for us beforehand so we can say my mom lives a pretty luxurious life.
I shiver and in 5 minutes I am taking a shower with cold water not because we don't have a heater but because cold water is the one for me. Don't judge! Like me.
After a good one hour of taking shower to piss my mom, I dry my hair with a towel and wear a t-shirt and shorts. The doorbell rings so I reach out to the door to open it. A girl about an inch shorter than me but a year older than me walks into my living room and hugs me tightly. Lilly, my Fuppi's daughter. I hug her back and suddenly my already nice mood becomes a thousand times better and I feel so good.
"You finally decided to show up? I'm so happy."
"Yass now let's go, I have so many things to talk to you about." She says, her creamy skin holding mine. I quickly Kiss my Fuppi on the cheeks and tell my mom about their arrival and then take my cousin to my room. I quickly snap a selfie with her and send it to Kashmira and In 10 minutes she's here too. This is not really my thing to do. It's Kashmira's way to give her life updates every five minutes on social media or to me specifically.
Lilly lives far off from us in Narayanganj so when she comes it usually is a cousinhood celebration for us the entire time she's here. From the beginning of our lives, we three have been together as each other's shields, each other's best friends.
"We're here, you're here let's go on a long drive together and grab food somewhere too? What do you say?", Kashmira says.
"I would love that. We should totally go. Let's ask for permission and go out about an hour from now so we can return before 8. What do you say, Lilly?." It's gonna be fun. I am excited all over again.
"Yeah let's go. I want to eat out too".
************************************
We are in Kahmira's BMW and well she is driving today although it's illegal in Bangladesh to drive before 18 and moreover with no license. Yes, I know that if we're caught with a teenager driving more than two teenagers who are not adults, common sense, then we might have to pay a charge of 10000 takas or more but really these sergeants need to chill out. I have more than belief in Kashmira's driving us around. The roads seem cleaner, the air fresher and only a few people walking by or traveling and masks became a part of daily attire. You just need to have it to feel safe or save a scolding from the cops.
So yeah we obviously ditched the main road and went for the shorter roads to avoid the dear sergeants. Lilly seems awfully quiet and the expression she is wearing is impenetrable. I am sitting on the passenger seat in the front with Kashmira and Lilly is sitting in the back. We play "London Boy" by Taylor Swift and sing along with it, Lilly is still not talking. She is not even singing.
"Are you alright? What is it?", I could not help but ask her. She's acting out of her character today.
"Yeah, of course, I am alright. What could possibly be wrong with me? It's not like I am sick or anything or even remotely worried that my mom found out about my conversation with the worker I was pranking on. You're being ridiculous Mahira", she stutters the words out of her mouth like a whirlpool washing machine. Kashmira and I exchange known glances and nod to ourselves and look back at her again.
" I blurt it out, didn't I?" She asks with her puppy hazel eyes and we nod in agreement. It has always been like this. She can never lie when she desperately needs to get something out of her chest. , a nervous action. There are two types of cunning people in the world:
1) Who looks cunning, is cunning, and doesn't try to hide it.
2) Who is cunning but hides it with fake innocence is apparently very secretive and only tells things at times of need or help but can't keep other's secrets.
Lilly is the second one, although I'm pretty sure I can get the secret out of her pretty soon.
"What is it?", we ask together," You know you can always confide in with us, we've been together like forever."
"Yep there's nothing we don't know about each other come on, even my parents don't know that that the stitches in my Forehead are from a rat biting when I was teasing it, and not from falling down the stairs. So tell us what's wrong with you?", Kashmira says laughing. A very bad habit of laughing in serious moments and sometimes it gets really irritating and annoying. I give her a sidelong look, glaring at her to shut up and she composes herself.
"So what is it bothering you?"
"Umm...that boy from the workshop downtown in Naraynaganj I was flinging with..."
"Yeah", Kashmira and I say in unison.
"Well yeah, mom found out about him, and let's say she wasn't happy with this. I reasoned out that I was just pranking him but they just said that I needed to upgrade my standard"
"Savage, "Kashmira says tugging a strand of her hair behind her ears, "you really need to. They said the ultimate truth. Grow up big sis".
"Yeah of course you know I was playing with him. He isn't obviously of my standard", Lilly says shaking her hand but why do I feel there is more than just that as if she was upset and uncomfortable when she said that. Like she might like him. Maybe I'm overthinking again.
Kashmira drives flawlessly as we sing songs along with the radio and dance carelessly inside the car. I turn the switch of the car and the roof of the car slides open. I stand up holding onto the car's roof and breathe in the fresh noon breeze. The sky looks beautiful.
The blue sky slowly fades into a dark red-orange, it's so mesmerizing that I sigh in unison to the flight of the fading clouds. I feel a kind of peace I haven't in months. The boredom, emptiness, loneliness, and online class schedules fade from my heart and are filled with peace and happiness and it feels like the sky infused it. I always feel lively under the sky. The road gets wider, the trees lesser and the streets busier as we finally reach our destination. Shaw's Steak.
Kashmira orders a lime tenderloin with oyster sauce, Lilly orders a sirloin steak and I go with my usual fish and chips and a crab. I was never a huge fan of steak really because seafood is my thing and I cannot be more thankful that Shaw's Steak has a seafood option and they're pretty good with it. There are fewer people out here and the maintenance of sitting with two vacant tables between is great.
The food arrives and the smell of fresh and just cooked steaks, fish and crabs fill my nostrils and my stomach rumbles with hunger. I take my knife and fork and just as I was about to dig in Kashmira dramatically shakes my hands away from my food.
"Wait, wait, wait, I need to take pictures of our food for stories, #cousinhangouts". What??!
"Seriously? " I ask in hunger and anger.
"I mean it. Wait for 5 minutes." She takes several pictures of our food from all dimensions and then with us until finally I dig into my food and gulp all of it hungrily praising every morsel of it. Tasting so good always!
" I'll be back in a minute, I need to use the washroom", I say and stand up. I am washing my hands after using the restroom and then I stare at my reflection in the mirror. I look at my golden bronze face. I have some blemishes across my left cheek and a few pimples here and there. This is beauty, right? I'm not perfect, nobody is. I don't apply makeup, never did neither have a skincare routine. The same old aloe moisturizer and that's it. But this doesn't make me hate myself. I love my flaws and I would very much love to love someone who loves me for the way I am, the imperfect me. I twist the washroom door open and walk out of the washroom when I bump into a guy and am welcomed by coca-cola not in a cup but on my clothes. It fell a little over my jacket and tank top and my jeans. I wanna curse at him. I know it wasn't his fault. It was unintentional but these are my new clothes. If my mom sees me she's totally freaking out and screaming at me. Urgh! I glare at him but I don't say anything. He looks at me apologetically.
" I'm so sorry. I am extremely sorry", he apologizes and hands me over some tissue papers. I quickly dab them to soak the extra liquid from my clothes. Thankfully it's not a lot to clean. At least he's not a jerk. I calm myself down and look at him. He's kinda cute.
"It's fine. It's okay", I say dabbing away the last coca-cola stains from my jacket. I hope it doesn't stain or my tank top is gone for good. I look at him with sidelong eyes. A black t-shirt, blue jeans, and pushed-back hair. His styling isn't bad. He's about 5 feet 11 inches tall. Doe eyes, sharp jawline, peachy complexion, his nose is kind of pointed to left, slightly distorted. I wonder what's the story behind the nose is. He can't be more than 20 or he could be less. Black eyes. If I had to categorize him I would probably say the cute boy from the neighborhood. Pretty basic.
He turns to go away without refilling the coca-cola cup that my clothes drank without asking for and is spilled all over the floor. I kinda feel bad for him. I can see myself in his shoes, too embarrassed to fill the cup and slipping away silently. I surprisingly find myself talking to him:
"You don't wanna fill your cup again?", I ask him.
"I am sorry again and yeah kinda embarrassed", he confesses smiling sheepishly.
"It's fine, really it happens", I assure him giving a small smile before going back to the table.
*******
"What happened to you? Did you take a shower there?" Kashmira asks laughing.
"You wish, I bumped into a guy and he spilled his coke on me".
" It happens always to you always. Your mom is not gonna be too happy about it. You're getting a scolding maybe a slap too", Lilly reassures passively.
"I know right. But he apologized and gave me a tissue paper. He was really sorry and embarrassed. He didn't bother to refill his cup again but I asked him to fill bis cup".
"Woah, you talked to him, that's surprising. Was he cute?", Kashmira asks.
"Yeah I did. And yeah he was cute".
As we were talking, I felt someone's gaze on me. I look across the table and it's the same guy. He's still filling his cup. It was a momentary eye contact but it felt like everyone else has disappeared as if time stopped. His dark eyes were bearing into my eyes and it wasn't awkward.