Today I have two feelings that I want to talk about because I think that they are confusing and have two sides depending on each person.
Selfishness.
Is it bad or good?
Does it depend on your intention?
Does it depend on your feelings behind?
Is it planned or something spontaneous?
I don't know. For me, the most important thing is the intention behind it. Because it isn't selfish to eat something and don't share it; maybe the person earns some money to buy it or; the person is hungry.
There were a lot of times when my soulmate said that I was selfish, but the majority of the reasons that she used to call me selfish were a bit ridiculous; for example, if I drink a cup of tea, I don't think if someone else wants one too because I'm not a fortune teller.
To be selfish, is it good or bad?
To be called selfish, is it good or bad?
To be selfish is to work hard to achieve your goals before someone else or; have something that you don't want to share because it is significant for you or to desire all of the good things for you and only you. I don't know because people have a general idea about selfishness but also with their ideas.
Time for an anecdote: A cup of tea, selfishness.
I like to drink tea or coffee in the evening because the weather isn't too cold or hot.
One day, the house was so quiet because each member of my family was doing different activities, so I entered the kitchen to boil water for my tea; I only boiled water for me because if I boiled more water, it would be a waste. I waited a few minutes, and I was preparing my tea, my soulmate entered the kitchen and saw me; she asked me: "How much water did you boil?" I responded: "I boiled enough to prepare my tea." after I answered, she looked upset and said to me: "You're selfish; you only do things to yourself and don't think in the others." For me, her words were ridiculous because other times at night, I used to prepare tea for all of the family, or I told them that there was boiled water. Also, I felt a bit upset because all the family was busy with their activities, so I didn't want to bother them; however, my desire of don't bother made me receive an unfair scolding.
The situation happened when sometimes I bought a snack, and I don't share it; for that reason, I usually hide my snacks and candies to eat them when I'm alone in my bedroom. I always try to avoid those situations because I don't have an obligation to sharing all that I buy.
................................................................
Ambition.
The ambition is exciting.
Some think that it is wrong, others good.
I considered myself an ambitious person.
To be ambitious is the desire to improve and achieve your goals or work to achieve things that look impossible.
Sometimes when people talk about their goals, others say that they are too ambitious, as if that was a bad thing, which it isn't. That could sound over-optimistic, but for me, nothing is impossible. The limits you impose on yourself make things impossible that's why you always have to try to overcome those limits that are self-imposed or set by other people.
I believed that being ambitious isn't bad; the bad thing is some methods that some ambitious people use to obtain what they want.
Those people call themselves astute. Sometimes their methods work but, they have consequences that they can solve on time so, all their effort becomes a waste of resources.
Sometimes the short way isn't the easy way, and it becomes more difficult over time.
Now is time for an anecdote: Ambition, another language, work hard, real effort.
I like the idea of learning different languages, so when I was 15 years old, I started to study my second language.
The first month, I was nervous but overwhelming; I didn't know how the teachers were going to rate me, so I just gave my best effort to learn grammar, spelling, writing, pronunciation, and more. At the final of the month, I received a good grade, and I was so happy. Also, I set a goal to obtain that same grade or a better one in the following months because I knew that I wasn't the best but, I could be the best if I worked hard.
I achieved my goal the following months; for that reason, some of my classmates knew that I had good grades talking with me to help them.
I helped my classmates because each month, we changed classrooms and, some of them changed to another schedule so, sometimes I saw them again or, I never saw them.
I had good grades in the first year and the majority of the second year of my studying of the language but, the final part of the second year and the third year were a bit difficult; however, I worked hard to achieve my goal.
Each month, I felt proud of myself when I saw my final grade.
That is my opinion of selfishness and ambition. Maybe some people could disagree with me but, that is fine because each person has their ideas and feelings about something, and they aren't the same or similar in a lot of cases.
At this moment, I'm a bit worried about sounding strange or being too ambiguous with my words, sounding like a book of tips but, all is going to make sense.
These are my feelings, my ideas, my opinions, and more so, I expressed them in a different and a little messy way; maybe it is a bit boring but, please wait, all of these are going to be more interesting.
Would you like to find out? But first, what do you think about diaries?
Are they interesting for you? Is it strange to write in your diary as you were talking with someone?