Kankri's features quickly changed into a hint of sadness and empathy, as you were already expecting that type of reaction. "Oh... I'm very surprised you even remember her. You were only around a few sweeps old before her passing. Was there anything specific?"
You gave a slight nod, "Yeah, I noticed that I was in a recoopercoon and there was this colorful tree, what was that all about?"
"Ah, impressive memory Karkat." A smile formed on his lips as he continued, "Mother had an obsession with art and the thoughtful meanings around it. She even had decided to paint a tree in your nursery. It was a representation of diversity, considering every leaf was a different color of the hemospectrum. Maybe she was foreshadowing some sort of hope for us in the future, or maybe she just knew you'd do something extraordinary one day and make your mark on the world."
The thought of you being some sort of child prodigy almost made you laugh, how could someone like you do anything remotely life-changing? A mutant, the most hated and ridiculed death sentence of your miserable life. Though you hadn't remembered much of your mother, she seemed to have very high expectations from you. You're kind of glad she wasn't here to see you and your fathers downfall, always disappointing somebody. At least she's spared from the chaos of this world, but you do kinda miss her. Who are you kidding, you long to feel her soft touch, comforting kisses, and soothing voice at least one more time. That dream could have messed you up in the head even more than you already are. You were scared to see someone you loved be killed, even if it was a dream.
Tears threatened to surface with all the memories bubbling up into your lucid thoughts, even the simple thought of someone believing you'll do something amazing for this world felt emotional. Your brother took notice quickly and placed a hand on top of your own with a caring expression curving his face. "I miss her too, Karkat. You're not alone by all means." He spoke softly, as if he already knew what you were thinking about. This is what you admire about Kankri, the feminine and reassuring qualities he most likely learned from your mother.
Silence plagued the room for a bit as you pondered about the woman you barely even knew. Kankri was right here willing to dish out answers for you, but were you ready for this emotional turmoil? With a heavy sigh, you spoke. "Kankri...? Can you tell me more about her?" Your hands twitched together, fiddling with your fingernails in a nervousness act.
"I believe it's the perfect timing for you to finally have some answers." With a quick movement, he stood from your bed side and collected the cloth from your forehead. "Though condoning this action may have negative effects on our sleeping habits, I'm considering a film of your choosing might be in order as we discuss the following topic. Don't you agree?"
"Fuck yes." You gave a small smile at your brother. How does he know you so well?
After you had gathered your pillow and blanket, you traveled down the narrow hallway and into the living room. Since the house had no carpet whatsoever, the floor was cold against the soles of your feet and you jumped to safety on the couch. This startled Kankri a bit and earned you a little glare, but it was totally worth saving your feet from getting two degree frostbite. You had made yourself a comfy blanket burrito, wrapping it around your body and placing the pillow on the arm of the couch. Your brother's stare was in a questionable state, but you didn't give a shit what he thought about you.
He lifted himself from the couch and crouched over by the movie rack, "What would be our viewing pleasure tonight?"
"Mmm-," You thought for a moment before something clicked into your mind, "Hitch."
"Alright then, a Will Smith movie it is." He said with a hint of laughter. You only rolled your eyes at his reaction. Even though you have a major platonic hatred for all of them, that certain human knows how to excerpt an emotional train wreak of comedy and complicated romances. You actually wanted to meet him some day, too bad your idealistic romance maker is long dead by now. Why do humans have to be so short lived, at least the ones you kinda not hate as much?
The movie was in and your brother was waiting patiently to receive questions. This made a bit of nervousness build inside of you. All you need to do was to ask questions and you'll finally receive back in return, but why was it so hard to think of one? To your dismay, both of you sat there in silence as the movie begun it's clever introduction to a main developing character you immediately love. You forced your way past the awkwardness and started with the basics any trollian would want to know, after all, Will was watching and you didn't want to disappoint a romance film prodigy.
"So... What was she like, our mom." The first question deployed with no injuries.
Your brother was leaned against the other arm of the couch, his attention faced you instead of the movie playing. " Well, she was a very kind and gentle soul compared to father. She was obviously the stay at home guardian, and looked after us as our father went and worked the mines. That gave her time to enjoy the small things around her, like painting for example, the tree in your old block. She had let me finger-paint a few portraits myself, but of course I was young and mothers art was so beautiful. Everything about her radiated the most amazing qualities, I even question now what she saw in our father. She was so dedicated to us, I remember she'd stay in bed with me and sang her lullaby until I fell asleep. Do you remember that, Karkat?"
A lullaby? You shake your head, not remembering anything you could about a song, but you can tell it was true. The voice you heard in your dream state, she was a destined lovely vocalist, if that was her original voice in the first place. Sadly, you wouldn't recognize it even if that was the right voice.
The conversation continued as Kankri discussed how he saw mom and dad's relationship unfold into something out of a dream. He caught a glimpse one night of the pair in the kitchen, one moment they were doing dishes and the next they were waltzing to an old radio station. Dad would dip mom and she would lean her head back, giving a soft laugh. Then a kiss would be placed on her lips, both rising and conversing with one another as if all of the troubles in the world was gone, a normal trollian family.
This went on as the questions had gotten more meaningful and surprising facts arose from Kankri's assumptions. From your mother and fathers relationship, all the way down to the last horrifying day you had been a witness of her death. You were there, but you just couldn't remember.
Something was building up inside you as Kankri spoke. Anger? Frustration? Sadness? You couldn't put a specific finger on just one emotion, they were all rushing to the surface with unrelenting force. Your hands quickly came to the rescue and shielded yourself as the tears came. Everything that you've been holding back was released for Kankri to see, you were vulnerable yet again. Kankri's voice was no longer audible, but you felt a warm pair of arms wrap around your encased body. This only made things worse as you sobbed grossly into your brothers brown shirt. With every comforting word seeping out of his lips, the more emotion that poured uncontrollably out of your system and onto his shoulder.
Most of the conversation was a pattern itself that involved either you or your brother crying, laughing, and talking about the one you both lost. It had just now came to mind that you weren't the only one miserable without her, missing her, wanting her back into your lives. You are so unconnected with Kankri and your fathers feelings, that you had no idea they felt the way you did, and worse. No matter what happened in the past, you still have them as family and even though you have no clue what that dream was for, maybe it was trying to tell you something. To move forward, and that's exactly what you're going to do.
As Kankri sung mother's lullaby in a quiet, hushed tone, everything was still, including you. You faded into sleep with ease, only one thought in your mind. 'I miss you.'