Chapter 14 - Chapter 11 part 2 “Reverse side of the coin”

Jungsuk had been looking at Jonghyong's face for half an hour, after waking up. He had already seen junior asleep, but now he could see him even closer, even more closely. His boyfriend was sleeping peacefully, his dark hair spread out on the pillow in a chaotic mess, his eyebrows relaxed, and the crease between them disappeared, his fluffy lashes fluttered slightly, his lips parted, making maknae look even more cute and young. Much younger than his years. There was no tension, no fear, that so often shrouded Jonghyong's mind and literally oozed out of his brown eyes. Jungsuk couldn't resist running the index finger of his right hand over the younger man's cheek, and junior winced in his sleep, smacking his lips, as he turned away from the insistent touch. Jungsuk covered his mouth, to keep from laughing. In fact, Jonghyong was just a child, who had to grow up very early, having faced terrible trials and difficulties in the past. No one should have to go through this, especially, alone! And Jungsuk wasn't going to leave junior alone now, when he trusted him enough, to tell the truth about, who he was. It wasn't even, that Jonghyong apparently liked playing bottom position and preferred rough sex to standard vanilla. Jungsuk didn't mind "playing", whether it was from the bottom or from the top. It doesn't matter. The most important thing was, how much it all hit Jonghyong, how much he must have changed after, what happened to him in the past, how he had to fight with himself every damn day, to accept and rein in the fears, that bound his mind and body.

Jungsuk squeezed his eyes shut, feeling irritated again. He will do whatever it takes, to make sure, that Jonghyong can forget, what he experienced, accept the future, at least partially. Park was willing to give this child everything, that he had, to make him happy. Because a man, like Kim Jonghyong, undoubtedly, deserved it.

Jungsuk took another look at his boyfriend's body from head to toe, slightly covered by a light blanket, and unconsciously licked his lips, biting the bottom one. More than anything else he wanted to caress this cocky boy, wake him up with soft kisses, press his lips, still tingling from last night, to maknae's flesh and caress, caress, caress, until Jonghyong broke into desperate moans and released his desire right on Park's face, staying in the post-orgasmic bliss of the morning. But the senior decided not to, so as not to scare Jonghyong. Junior had just begun to open up for him, to let him in, to lift the veil of trust, and now he would simply not be ready for this kind of frank actions in the morning. So Jungsuk just sighed, feeling, how his cock grow hot in his pants, and stretched, getting out of bed and heading for Kim's bathroom. The morning boner has not been canceled yet.

After the water treatment, Jungsuk returned to junior's room, drying his wet hair with a towel. Now he could see maknae's "abode" better. The most simple room of a teenager with a slight hint of disorder: here and there lay junior's things, a computer, game console, a TV, and a pile of disks and notebooks, scattered on the table. Jungsuk chuckled, glancing at the still snoring guy, who was lying on his stomach with his arms outstretched, and one of his legs, sticking out from under the blanket.

Park walked around the room, running a finger over the surface of each of Kim's items, and his attention was drawn to the canvases, that stood in the farthest corner. He came closer and looked at the paintings. Or to be more precise, landscapes of various kinds and styles. Some of them were written with paints, others were made in the form of sketches in pencil or pencil lead. Jungsuk admired each of them, carefully picking up and then returning. Jonghyong told him, that liked to draw and even wanted to enter the faculty of fine arts, which his father did not allow him to do. But Park had no idea, how beautiful junior's works would be. They seemed to come to life before eyes: clouds floated across the sky, the sun shone brighter than the present, lush greenery sparkled, rivers and lakes bubbled, the earth literally breathed, and the wind enveloped from head to toe. Honestly, it was breathtaking. But suddenly his gaze caught on an easel a little further away, covered with a light canvas. Park turned back to the bed and found, that Jonghyong was still asleep. He wanted to see, what his junior was working on right now. Knowing Jonghyong's temperament and character, Park knew, that there was no way he would let him see his landscape, until, at least, he was done. Although even in this case Jungsuk doubted it. Jonghyong was a very self-critical guy and was never satisfied with the result of any of his work. In the case of paintings, for sure, the situation was exactly the same.

Feeling like a thief, Jungsuk went to the easel and gently pulled a corner of the cloth. The young man closed his eyes, feeling the wrongness of his action.

'But it's so damn interesting to see!'

Taking a deep breath, Park nodded to himself and abruptly pulled the cloth away, revealing the stretched canvas. His eyes widened in shock and surprise, then turned to admiration. Park froze, pinned to the floor, and stared at… himself. There was an image of him on the light canvas. The lines, blurred in places, looked like a finished sketch. The work was still in progress, but it clearly resembled the object of the author's observation. The proportions, parts of the face, chiaroscuro, angles, lines… everything was displayed with precision and pedantry so, that it was like looking at himself in a mirror, so much did the portrait resemble him, although not yet finished. Mesmerized, Jungsuk reached out and touched the nose line of his "double", noticing, how accurately it was depicted. Even the smallest details in the form of his earrings, every hair on his eyebrows, or a strand on his head were carefully displayed.

"Hyong?"

Jungsuk recoiled from the portrait as if scalded because of the sound of Jonghyong's sleepy voice. He felt incredibly ashamed, that he had invaded junior's personal space without permission. But it was too late to retreat.

"Hyong, what are you…" Jonghyong blinked and tried to figure out, where senior had gone, holding his hand so fiercely and tightly all night. Kim couldn't sleep from the overwhelming thoughts and sensations until almost dawn, looking at the beautiful profile of his Hyong in the dimness of the room, while he was already sniffing sweetly into the pillow. And managed to doze off only in the morning. That was why he was now rubbing his eyes and wincing from sleep. But as soon as he got used to the daylight, Jonghyong saw his Hyong next to… the portrait, which he was persistently and methodically drawing for several months now. Kim immediately went cold with fear, but his cheeks flushed. The dream was gone, and he jumped out of bed, instantly standing next to Hyong, covering up his unfinished work, as if he was ashamed of, what he had done. All the things, which he had done with Jungsuk the day before, had faded into the background. At the moment there is a more significant problem. Hyong saw something, that he shouldn't have fucking seen!

"Hyong, no! Heck! You shouldn't have seen this! This…" Jonghyong continued to hide the portrait, standing with his back to it, pushing senior's chest with his hands.

Jungsuk tried to look guilty, really, but this funny reaction from maknae made him burst out laughing.

"What the hell are you neigh?" Kim was indignant at first, even a little taken aback, folding his arms across his chest, grinning and bristling, like a small, disgruntled kitten. Realizing, what he looked like from the outside, Jonghyong buried in his hands, groaning, and ran palms over his face so, that the grimace resembled a wax mask from a horror movie.

"I must look like a complete cretin, hah?" Kim chewed on his lower lip, glancing at senior from under his brows. What was the point of hiding, what Hyong had already seen? His reaction was too nervous, in Jonghyong's opinion. And that gave him away.

Jungsuk continued to chuckle, unable to take his eyes off maknae. He was so charming and sexy at the same time, that wanted to kiss those damn lips of his, touch the mole under them, run his tongue around the adam's apple, going down to…

"A little," Jungsuk decided to tease maknae a little and at the same time draw attention away from himself. After all, it was his fault, that Jonghyong was now blushing and embarrassed in front of him, not knowing, where to look away.

"Aish!"

"Jonghyong-e," Jungsuk cautiously approached maknae and turned him around. Jonghyong stared straight at the portrait of his boyfriend and tried to cover his face with his hands again, but Jungsuk wouldn't let him, intercepting and lowering them to his stomach, placing his own on top. Senior's chin rested on Kim's shoulder, and for some reason Jonghyong felt, how everything inside him yearn to get closer to him, reaching out to him, calming down, and relaxing at the same time. The way, how Jungsuk hugged him from behind, his hands on top of maknae's, the steady breathing that tickled his neck – all this gave indescribable peace and protection. Jonghyong had never felt this way before. Sure, he felt safe around Yumin-Hyong, but this was different. The security, granted by Jungsuk, was different. Closer, deeper, more… native.

"You're amazing! Your hands are magical. Look," Jungsuk took junior's hand in his and drew the lines of his own face, "I've never seen anything like this… This… I have no words, really. You can't do that, what you told me earlier. You can't, do you hear?! It would be blasphemous to give it up," Jungsuk remembered, that Kim thinking about stopping drawing and focusing on his studies. After all, his father would never allow him to change faculty. And each new attempt to occupy free time with a favorite activity led to another major quarrel, shouting, slamming doors, and anger. But now, that he had seen Jonghyong's creations in person, he just couldn't let him just drop it. Bury it in the ground. Hide it in a dark box. Bury his talent.

A slight wave of excitement ran through the body of Kim from another sincere praise, but still, the contradiction and severity to himself did not allow him to fully enjoy it.

"I don't know… Not sure, that I'm that good," Jonghyong muttered almost in a whisper and felt, how a shiver run down his neck at the vibration of Hyong's laughter. His hands were gently stroking Jonghyong's fingers.

"You're asking for another compliment right now, Jonghyong-a," Jungsuk said, running his nose over the younger guy's skin, and the latter tilted his head to one side, in an attempt to avoid being tickled.

"Why don't you paint portraits? You're doing great. I was just shocked! It feels like looking in the mirror," Jungsuk sat across from Jonghyong on the wide windowsill, while junior smoked and finished his morning coffee.

"People are too uninteresting and primitive. They do not have the frank and genuine beauty, that you can see when you watch nature. I like to imagine, what I want to display on paper in the future. I like to feel, how the sun caressing my skin, the wind ruffling my hair, the water cooling my body, the leaves tickling my fingers. This is much more beautiful. Nature is beautiful in its embodiment. Whether it's a thunderstorm or a hot summer day. Nature never lies, unlike people."

Jungsuk nodded in understanding. Jonghyong was completely right. Nature could be both harsh and benevolent. But unlike humans, she could give you a lot, without asking for anything in return.

"But you drew me," Park couldn't help and play with his eyebrows, then ran his tongue along the side of his mouth. Kim immediately flared up, like a match, and rubbed his neck, inhaling feverishly.

"You're the exception to the rule," smiled sheepishly Jonghyong, "you just won't leave my head. I thought about you so often, imagining you in my dreams and fantasies, that it drove me crazy. Your image haunted me, even in my dreams. So I decided to write your portrait in the hope, that it will help. But it just seems to get worse," Jonghyong's chuckle made senior run a hand through his hair. Such a frank confession meant a lot to junior, and Jungsuk couldn't express his delight. But suddenly his eyes widened in surprise.

"So that's what Jeonhyun wanted to tell me!"

"What?" Jonghyong frowned, unable to keep up with Hyong's thoughts.

"Yesterday, he wanted to tell me something… That you are constantly talking about me and something else, but I didn't have time to understand, because you brazenly interjected in our conversation," Jungsuk gave the younger guy a reproachful poke, which made him gasp and rub the bruised spot.

"Hyong, that brat can tell you things, that will drive you crazy. Believe me. I've been living with him for thirteen years," Jonghyong rolled his eyes. He loved his brother very much, but sometimes he just exasperated him with his annoying and disobedience.

"But this time he told the truth!" another poke brought a painful "Aish!" from Jonghyong, his brows creased, and eyes squeezed shut. "And you discussed me… with him?! Kim Jonghyong, you were gossiping about me with your little brother!" Jungsuk began to tickle Jonghyong under the ribs.

"No! No! Hyong! Stop it! Damn it, don't!" Jonghyong tried to run away from the insistent fingers, but Park intercepted him across the belly, as junior jumped off the windowsill, and threw him on the bed.

Jonghyong laughed, closing his eyes, loud and clear, which made the edge of his snowy teeth showed, the top two of which were slightly larger, than the rest, a little like a rabbit's, and it convincing Park, that junior was laughing, really, sincerely and with feeling.

"Hyong?"

Jungsuk found, that hanging again, just as he had yesterday, looking at the younger guy. His hands were still pressed to his sides, to protect his ribs from intrusion. Breath caught in the throat. His cheeks and neck flushed again. His brown eyes shone in the glare of the bright sun, which shone more clearly, than ever today.

Jungsuk moved a little closer to the younger man's face, causing him to immediately close his eyes. Park lightly touched his lips to his eyelids, nose, cheeks, and chin. Kim's arms wrapped around Jungsuk's back uncertainly, and senior exulted inwardly at the fact, that Jonghyong was reaching out to meet him slowly, but surely, trying to overcome all the things, that scared him so much, when he was close to a man.

"Jonghyong-e…" Jungsuk was already whispering junior's name into his lips, preparing to kiss him softly and tenderly, but suddenly…

"Hyong!"

Jungsuk jumped away from Jonghyong so quickly, that he couldn't help falling to the floor, hitting his butt. Choked and hiss, Park rubbed the injured spot, and a second later in the room was flooded Jeonhyun.

"Hyong! You have woke me up, aish! Neighing so, that the whole house could be heard. What were you two doing here?" Jeonhyun looked carefully at first one senior, then the other. "Hyong," Jeonhyun said to Park now, "why are you sitting on the floor? This tyrant made you sleep on the mat next to the door?!"

Jungsuk stifled a laugh, as he looked from the sarcastic Jeonhyun to the angrily irritated Jonghyong.

"Jeonhyun-e," Jonghyong smiled falsely and continued, "first, learn to fucking knock when you come in here. Two, get the fuck out of my room. Third, see point two, you little shit!"

Jonghyong threw a pillow at his brother, but it flew past him, and Jeonhyun ran out of his brother's room, shouting as ran, "Jungsuk-Hyong, I want to play with you. You promised me! Because that stubborn Hyong, which I call my brother, is always running out of time!"

"You jailbait prick!" Jonghyong cursed and got up from the bed, giving Park a hand, because he couldn't get up, still choking on his laughter. "What the fack are you neighing again? You can't imagine, what a little piece of shit this bastard can be! Even though I love him, he's still a jerk!"

Jungsuk nodded, unable to stop laughing. Wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, he took a deep breath and reached up to touch Jonghyong's hair, which was still damp from the morning shower.

"Come on. I did promise your brother to play with him. I don't want his jokes directed at me either."

Jonghyong only inhaled indignantly through his nose, feigning resentment, and again feeling a worm of jealousy somewhere deep inside. It seems, that he was beginning to understand, what a real serious relationship is.

***

Jungsuk was nervous. Was so nervous, that hamstrings were shaking. He had no idea, how to behave, even though Jonghyong had fully instructed him, as he always did, about the venue, dress code, rules, and ethics. He himself suggested Jonghyong attend the theme meeting and was more than happy with junior's reaction. Jonghyong has long wanted to attend an event dedicated to the theme of "knife-play", and Park decided to agree exactly on the birthday of junior. In the short period, that he and Jonghyong had met, Park had been to a lot of similar training sessions with Kim, and they had been held quite often. But he never experienced this kind of uncertainty. Of course, when he first entered the private club, that Jonghyong was a member of, and now Park himself, he was shocked and unsure of himself, although he kept his face as possible. Despite the fact, that Jungsuk studied a fabulous amount of information and enlisted the stories of junior, still he imagined a dark room in red and black tones, tense music, half-naked men and women, having orgies with each other, as if at some ancient rite. But everything turned out to be exactly the opposite. And the young man realized this already at the first meeting. Quite a spacious room on the first floor of the club was decorated in calm and even colors, not straining the eyes, people, attending meetings, were completely adequate and sane. No one forced anyone to do anything, all sessions were held in the form of demonstration performances, prepared in advance, and discussed. Inviting the audience from the "hall" in order, to try their skills, was not welcome, unless they were regulars of the club, who had previously participated in such actions. Also, Jungsuk was pleasantly surprised, that at least fifty percent of the visitors to such meetings were not fully involved in the theme, they were just interested observers, or newcomers like himself unless the party was incognito, and only members of the club could get in. If desired, could find a pleasant companion both on the themed practice and outside of it. In general, such events resembled a kind of meeting of different people, sharing experiences and having a good time. However, there were certain rules. Touching someone without permission was an impolite and even rude gesture, as well as picking up the devices of a particular Master. During the demonstration session, it was necessary to observe silence, so as not to dispel the carefully prepared atmosphere, not to distract the Top, and most importantly, his bottom. By mutual consent, all questions could be asked after the action and the rest of its participants. It was not recommended to stand too close to the session venue, climb on the "stage" or otherwise indicate your presence, because there was simply a risk of damage to any device, that the Master used. Everything, that happened within the club, required a certain tolerance and absolute confidentiality, so it was strictly forbidden to express yourself rudely, incompletely, offensively towards any participant of the event, as well as to take your own photos and videos. Alcohol and any other narcotic drugs were also strictly prohibited. Of course, for one glass of alcohol a guest present would not be thrown out, but it was inappropriate and simply dangerous, to be in such a meeting in a deranged state. The "hanky code" system* was actively used at meetings, especially, by those, who came alone and were just preparing to set foot on the theme path. But, as a rule, there was no strict dress code, unless the meeting didn't have a pre-prepared topic.

Park was still new to BDSM theme, though a little more so than those, who were visiting the club for the first time. But today he was more nervous, than usual. He had been very careful and courteous, in securing junior's confidence for almost a year. Jonghyong opened up to him in a way, that Park didn't think, that he would at the beginning. Of course, there were some problems. For example, when he remembered the first time with Kim, he felt a warm, pleasant tickle, run through his body. A smile curved the corner of his mouth. A slight feeling of euphoria covered him with a duvet. Jungsuk felt aroused every time, when he remembered, how caressing Jonghyong's body, slowly and carefully stretching him, leaving wet kisses on the pale skin, entering, moving in, cum inside. It was a pleasant memory now. But then… it was scary. Jungsuk had no idea, how to move, how to behave, what to do. He realized, that he didn't know his partner from the word "completely". And Jonghyong was lying on the bed under him, so open and innocent, despite all that he had experienced, and Jungsuk was choking on his overflowing emotions. Their first sex was silly, slightly awkward even. They studied each other, checked their reactions, touched their bodies in search of the most pleasant areas. Jungsuk was always talking to Jonghyong whenever, when he noticed, how the fear clouding brown eyes, how the younger guy was shivering and shrinking under him, squinting, that to control himself, breathing hard from a mixture of terror and excitement. And after embarrassment, blushes, and cries, because he could not cope with himself, satisfy his partner, open up completely. Jungsuk stroked his hair after a thorough shower, kissed his cheeks, nose, and blood-bitten lips, feeling it on his tongue, hugging and rocking him, like a baby. Jonghyong was crying, dropping his tears right on senior's chest, clinging to him like a lifeline. He managed to step over this line and give himself to Hyong. But it happened differently, that how he had imagined it in his most candid and vulgar fantasies. Also, the main problem remained his addiction to masochism. Jungsuk couldn't afford to do that, what Master did to Jonghyong, simply because of his inexperience and ignorant. Although over time senior still became more… careful to pay attention to such light things, as immobilizing Jonghyong during intimacy, spanking, slight asphyxia, showing rigidity, and sometimes even rudeness in movements. But Jungsuk himself felt that this was not enough. He wasn't stupid and knew, that Jonghyong needed to let off steam in his usual way from time to time, especially, given the global changes in his life. So Park wasn't surprised, when he heard an uncertain and even guilty whisper from Jonghyong, as he lay in his arms on the couch, watching another movie.

"I still visit my Master."

Jungsuk didn't take his eyes off the TV. It was as if Jonghyong had told him about the weather. Park couldn't deny, that there was an unpleasant ache inside him. During their small "games" he always felt his affiliation with Kim as not only the junior but also how he gives himself to him. Jungsuk was always confident, he knew, that he was smart and good-looking, and took advantage of it. Even from the bottom position, which he sometimes tried in the past with his other partners, Park never considered himself weak-willed. He liked to be active in relationships, he liked to take responsibility, to finish the job, to strive for his goal and achieve it. But to feel the power over Jonghyong's body was akin to something new. Jungsuk wasn't just on top – he was really Top. Jonghyong listened to him unquestioningly, whether it was a compliment, a request, or a wish. Jungsuk was literally taking over Jonghyong. And each time he realized, that he liked this feeling. Power over someone else's body was intoxicated and inflamed, and controlling others' minds was like having an orgasm. When Jonghyong cum only after the words of his senior, when he moaned louder at the mere command, obediently accepted Hyong, despite the pain, that, no matter how hard try, accompanied any sexual act, Jungsuk literally exulted in body and soul. And more and more often began to think about, what it would be like to enter the theme more thoroughly.

Jungsuk wasn't surprised, to hear an uncertain and even guilty whisper from Jonghyong, but the inner Dominant, that kept waking up in him, frowned and folded his arms, feeling hurt. Although outwardly, Jungsuk did not show it, so as not to cause unnecessary emotions in junior. He and Jonghyong talked often and a lot, because as time went on, Jonghyong became more open about his thoughts and feelings, less embarrassed in Park's presence. And this conversation should not be different from the hundreds of previous ones. After all, Jungsuk didn't have enough qualifications, so he shouldn't have blamed junior for, that he acts according to his inner worldview. After all, Jungsuk himself told Jonghyong, that he shouldn't change for his sake.

"Did you hear, what I said?!" the next question was more irritating, than the first. Jonghyong was stung. He waited for at least some reaction from the senior, but Hyong continued to sit and stare at the TV screen.

"I heard you," Jungsuk breathed, but he still didn't even look at the younger guy, only hugged him tighter around the waist, either because he wanted to show his interest, or because of a nasty feeling, that was still swirling somewhere in the subcortex.

"And?" Jonghyong relaxed slightly, when he realized, that Jungsuk wasn't ignoring him. He decided to tell him, because it was better for him to say it himself, than for senior to see it firsthand. After all, if he turns his back on Park, his meeting with Master will become obvious. Jonghyong was grateful to Jungsuk for his self-control and attention, but he still lacked the familiar sensations. Jungsuk was too… soft, too sweet, much all… Sometimes Kim wanted to make him lose his temper, to make him angry, and provoke, at least, some specific actions. Because his tenderness and care sometimes pressed on Kim so, that he wanted to drown in the tank. Therefore, Jonghyong continued to meet with Blake-Hyong, who, by the way, pushed him to the decision to tell his partner about it. And Jonghyong agreed with him this time. He and Jungsuk were still moving toward the level of trust, that he had with his Master, so Kim didn't want to lie to his partner, didn't want, that the guilt eating away at him and making it impossible for him to relax and think straight.

"What do you want me to say?" Jungsuk finally turned his head in the direction of Jonghyong, and junior was covered in a string of goosebumps from head to toe. Anger pulsed in Hyong's eyes. This was the first time, when Jonghyong had ever seen him like this, at least, in terms of himself. But he had already brought up this sensitive topic, so it was pointless to back down. They always talked to each other. And now, in Kim's opinion, was the time.

"Sorry," Kim still felt guilty, rubbing his neck, slowing down a little, "I just don't want to lie to you. But I can't do it any other way, you know? You know, who I am. You know, what my body is used to, and most importantly, this," Jonghyong jabbed a finger at his temple. "But there is no closeness between us in the truest sense of the word!" Jonghyong grabbed Hyong's hands in his, and Jungsuk exhaled. It seems, that all this time he could not even breathe. There was no need for Jonghyong's words. Jungsuk trusted him implicitly and was completely sure, that junior simply couldn't lie down under someone, even if he wanted to. The anger, that had hit him like an anvil just now, disappeared as quickly, as it had appeared.

"Know," carefully, so as not to frighten, he released one of maknae's hands and placed it on his head, as often did. Jonghyong closed his eyes.

"And I will tell you again, that you must not change because of me."

"But it weighs on me. I feel like I'm betraying you. I don't think, that you'll be happy to meet me late at night after another session with my Master."

"And you want to move here permanently?" Jungsuk looked around his room and chuckled. For the most part, Jonghyong spent his free time with him, while Jungsuk lived alone, unlike junior.

"Hyong, you're not listening to me!" Jonghyong punched senior in the shoulder, making him wince. Maknae's hands were big and strong, but the blow was not so heavy.

"I'm listening carefully, Jonghyong. And you're right. As much as I try to hide it, I don't like, that you visiting your… Master. Although I understand and trust you. And I really appreciate your sincerity. I'm not asking you to change anything about yourself, and I never will. But that doesn't mean, that we can't do anything," now Jungsuk grabbed Jonghyong's hands, as a hint of fear flickered in junior's eyes at his words.

"But what can we do?" Jonghyong asked almost in a whisper. He wanted to take advantage of Blake-Hyong's offer more, than ever. He wanted, that Jungsuk to stand in his place. Or, at least, doing some of, what Kim was used to, at home. But he couldn't force Jungsuk to do such a thing, even though he could see, how his eyes light up with lust and desire for possession every time Jonghyong followed his words. When Jungsuk takes full control of his body. When a senior is in control of the situation. Kim wasn't wrong. Park definitely had the makings of a theme. And his position as Top was also obvious. But Jungsuk didn't force him to change because of him, which means, that Kim doesn't have the right to demand changes from senior, no matter how much he wants to.

"I want to get into the theme."

"What?!" Jonghyong almost choked on his own saliva. One moment he was mentally condemning himself for wanting this, and now he was hearing a similar suggestion from the mouth of senior.

"You heard me," Jungsuk said, looking at the younger guy without blinking, serious and aware. Jonghyong waited for, that Park to smile his playful smile and wink, turning everything into a joke, but he remained serious.

"Hyong, you don't have to…"

"I'm not doing this for you, do not flatter yourself," the main reason, of course, was still Jonghyong. But Park couldn't deny, that he was attracted to the very thought of it.

"Is that so?" Jonghyong suddenly relaxed, as if a heavy stone had just been lifted from his tense shoulders.

"I don't want, that you to think, that I'm doing this 'just' because of you. I'm really interested in this. In case you haven't noticed by now," this time Jungsuk winked at junior, which earned him a reproachful look from under his brown bangs.

"Hyong," Jonghyong brushed a stray lock of Jungsuk's black hair away, "are you sure? This isn't a game. I don't want, that you to become, like me."

Jungsuk stared into Jonghyong's eyes for a long time, and Kim thought, that now he might change his mind.

"I'm sure. But unfortunately, I need your help. I'm not a complete zero, but I still don't have that kind of experience."

Jonghyong nodded, embarrassed, and leaned his head back against senior's shoulder. A couple of days after this conversation their first visit to the club for one of the sessions for beginners took place.

Right now Jungsuk was wringing his fingers, again and again, trying to control his breathing, because he was so nervous before the club party started. The theme, that Jonghyong chose, scared Park. "Knife-play" is not the most dangerous game in BDSM practice. For the most part, it is based on the fear and psychological reactions of the bottom to the actions of their Top. Still, the knowledge, that the point of the knife would be touching his boyfriend's skin, made Park numb, and he couldn't tell, if he was feeling more excited or scared. Games with knives, according to Jungsuk's knowledge, were conducted in two ways – using blunt or sharp objects. And if a knife with a blunt blade was not particularly harmful, then a sharp device could easily cause serious damage without a certain skill and knowledge. Jungsuk couldn't deny, that along with his fear for Jonghyong, there was a shiver deep inside him. Imagining, how cold the metal will slide along the delicate skin of maknae, which was immediately covered with goosebumps, Park distorts from the strain. But his cock twitched with treacherous interest whenever senior thought about it. Jungsuk beat around the bush about this idea for a long time, but still managed to make up his mind. But that didn't mean, that he fully shared his junior's enthusiasm.

"We don't have to do this if you don't want to," Jonghyong stared into his Hyong's brown eyes, feeling, how his body tense, as he came closer. Jonghyong wanted to attend this meeting. Really want. But he was willing to give it up if Jungsuk didn't like it. Junior couldn't express the degree of his delight, which felt deep into his heart. And this was not due to the anticipation of the upcoming action. Jonghyong was so grateful to Jungsuk for his attention, sensitivity, and desire, that he couldn't stand still, shifting from one foot to the other, almost jumping up and down. A huge balloon swelled in the chest, ready to burst from an overabundance of helium. And it was Park, fucking, Jungsuk's fault. Kim couldn't imagine, how such a person could even be real. Jungsuk agreed to do things for him, that others hadn't even heard of. Jonghyong never imagined that he would ever meet such a person. The overwhelming sensation brought tears to his eyes, and his chest was bursting. Jonghyong felt strange. He couldn't explain, what this aching feeling was, but he knew, that he definitely liked it.

"Hey," Jungsuk put his hands on maknae's shoulders, nuzzling his forehead. "Calm down, do you hear? It's all right. It's not your fault. I really want to. I'm not going to lie, it scares me a little, but I want to," Jungsuk tried to speak slowly and clearly, as he usually did, when another panic attack, though now more rare, rolled over on junior.

The familiar place threw Jungsuk into an atmosphere of relaxation and calm. Oddly enough, as soon as he was here, all the old uncertainty disappeared, leaving the only interest in the upcoming performance. Jungsuk kept close to Jonghyong, holding his hand, greeting familiar faces, and bowing respectfully to the newcomers. Jonghyong shivered slightly in anticipation, and Jungsuk moved closer to him, giving him the support and attention, that the younger guy needed now.

Turning his gaze to the center of the room, Park saw a "stage", set up on a raised platform, on which was fixed across as tall as a man, completely covered in soft black leather. Above and below shackles were attached to metal rings, that would presumably immobilize the bottom. A young man of medium height with mint-colored hair was standing next to the installation. He was wearing a kind of mantle, oddly enough, completely white, which allowed him to move freely around the stage without restricting movement. The man turned slightly sideways, and Jungsuk could see, how he carefully checked a set of knives on a small table, set up nearby. All the tools glinted like steel in the still-bright light of the room, the blades did not have jagged, smooth, and sharpened at a certain angle. The man carefully, time after time spent on the canvas of the next "device" alcohol wipes, disinfecting, preparing for the process. Jungsuk admired how well-honed and precise he was performing his manipulations. The man's profile did not reflect a single emotion.

Jonghyong tensed next to Jungsuk, but Park didn't give it any thought, because he knew, that, what was happening, was both exciting and intoxicating for the younger guy, which was why his body's reactions were now strained to the limit. But what Jungsuk didn't expect, was a strangled exclamation from his boyfriend, followed by bulging eyes, when the man on stage turned in their direction and shot junior a look. Again not a single feature on the beautiful face, as Jungsuk noticed, did not waver. Then eyes of this man stared straight at Jonghyong as If scanning him from head to toe. Jungsuk turned to look at junior and noticed, that he was looking at the man with fascination, admiration, and respect. Jealousy because of the stranger began to grow inside, even though Park hadn't yet figured out, what the hell was going on.

"John, are you okay?" Jungsuk addressed Jonghyong by his assumed alias, as was customary within the walls of this establishment. Jonghyong continued to stare at the stranger on the stage, and Jungsuk wanted to punch the guy in white on his unreadable mien. This is the most admiring and humble Jungsuk has ever seen Jonghyong.

"Only shit!" junior swore, not taking his eyes off the stage. "This is Blake-Hyong."

"Who?" Jungsuk still wanted to know, what the fuck peepers this guy was arranged with his boyfriend.

"My Master."

Jungsuk's heart sank. He turned his gaze back to the man on the stage and began to examine him more closely. Minty, literally the color of frost, hair was scattered in a chaotic mess, which gave the young man the effect of mystery, eyebrows were clear and black, piercing fox eyes, a small neat nose, a clear line of lips, slightly sharp, but no less attractive features, several silver rings in both earlobes and such a white, as an eyesore, clothing. To be honest, Jungsuk couldn't help and admit, that senior was… hot. So hot and attractive in this way of holding himself and showing himself, that, if it weren't for the fact, that he was already completely and irrevocably engaged, he would have unquestioningly put himself under the arm of this walking sex in the flesh. He wouldn't even have had to be persuaded. Would have shoved pride and sarcasm to the back of mind, not even arguing about the position of the catcher and the hitter, because this guy's aura was just so engrossingly heavy. Will not will want to bend.

Blake-Hyong, as Jonghyong called him, suddenly turned his deadpan eyes from junior to Jungsuk himself, and Park felt, like he was, fucking, trembling. Damn it, is seriously shaking so, that he is ready to lean against any surface, just not to have the prospect of collapsing to the floor. The uncertainty returned with a new force, and Jungsuk felt like a bug under this man's gaze. Although he had never noticed it in himself. And it hit ego so hard, that wanted to go up on stage and spit on this arrogant senior right in the face, because allowed himself to stare at Jungsuk's boyfriend like that, and besides, cornered him. But the man seemed to read his thoughts, and the next second a faint smile flickered across his lips. Not snide, not mocking. This is how a parent smiles at their child, who once again does not understand the obvious, as if saying, "Silly, how could you even think of such a thing?". Still, a feeling of dissatisfaction with himself was boring into the back of his head, and Jungsuk tensed like a string, unconsciously clenching his hands into fists.

"Hyong, are you all right?" Jonghyong whispered in his ear, which made Park flinch as if he'd been slapped. He looked back at his boyfriend, feeling, how anger rises from the very depths of his possessive gut. He wanted to grab Jonghyong by the arms and fuck him in the roughest way, that he could, and that junior could handle, to secure his position. Jonghyong is his. And only him. So, why the hell is this walking sex staring at him like that, why the hell is Jonghyong shaking all over when he takes a look at his former Master?

"It's okay," Jungsuk made an effort, to smile tightly, even though he knew, that it wouldn't make much difference. His whole being screamed out exactly, what he was feeling.

Jonghyong frowned but didn't bother his senior. There was something more important to do now. If the session will be conducted by his former Master, then he will definitely not be able to miss it. Blake-Hyong was really good at this kind of practice. And Jonghyong, at first slightly shocked by his presence here as the main person of the evening, now watched the man with all his eyes.

After a short announcement, the lights were slightly dimmed, but enough so, that can easily see, what is happening on the stage, and most importantly, do not leave the Master without a review. The music was changed to a more appropriate one. All present gathered around the pedestal at the utmost distance in full attention. A young guy, who looked to be the same age as Jonghyong, walked up to the stage and bowed his head obediently, waiting for his Master's actions. Blake-Hyong carefully took the medium-sized chain, that ran from the black leather collar, that encircled the bottom's neck, and led him to the set structure. Blake secured the submissive's arms and legs in bracelets and wrapped a strong leather belt around his waist, checked them for immobilization, then put a mask over the eyes of his performance partner, thereby blocking the view from everything that was happening, promising more thrills. Even from a distance, Jonghyong could see, how the submissive's chest immediately begin to rise and fall raggedly after this action, even though Master hadn't even done anything yet. Blake-Hyong picked up one of the knives from the table and slowly brought it up to the bottom's face, carefully applying the fabric to the skin, leading it down to the jawline. Jonghyong inhaled a ragged breath, as he noticed, that submissive twitch in anticipation of his master's actions. The man descended even lower, drawing a line along the neck and chest, tracing the tip of each halo of the young guy's nipple, which made him twitch and lean forward with his whole body, but the shackles held his arms and legs tightly, and the leather belt around his waist made it almost impossible to move. The point of the knife danced all over the body of the bottom, then going higher, then going lower, without damaging the skin, only bringing a thrill. The young guy writhed and moaned, which was clearly audible in the crowded room, while Master remained calm and calm, acting with knowledge, but even from a distance, could see the man's eyes sparkle, completely covered with blackness. And then there was a deafening, loud groan from the submissive, as the blade of the knife sliced through his dark, golden skin at the proper angle in the area of his ribs. The cut was shallow, barely perceptible, but all of this was so disturbing, that couldn't remain indifferent. He tried to move again, but as planned, to no avail. The next cut was on the right side of the abdomen, above the pelvic bones. Thin neat lines also did not bypass the outer side of the guy's shoulders and forearms. Small tendrils of blood decorated each cut, forming a single large drop, ready to slip on the hairline at the slightest movement of the submissive. Dominant really enjoyed the spectacle, licking his lips again and again, as he noticed, how sensitive and sensual his bottom was responding to his manipulations, the pianist's long fingers deftly and tenaciously held the handle of the knife, using it, like an experienced butcher, cutting the skin a noticeable, slightly painful, but correct, so as not to cause significant harm. Bottom gasped, threw his head back between the cross, and clenched his fingers and toes. On closer inspection could see, how the nostrils let out air with noise, the mouth opening in a long moan, the nimble tongue sliding along the edge of the teeth again and again, and a drop of sweat running down the temple.

Jungsuk tried to follow Master's manipulations carefully, but all his mind was occupied by junior, who was standing so close to him, that Park could feel him on his skin. Jonghyong's gaze was completely focused on his former Top, his eyes blazing with such respect and undisguised admiration, each time widening at the next action of the man's hand. Jonghyong's hand tightened on Jungsuk's wrist again and again. Maknae's breathing quickened in time with the breathing of bottom on the stage, and Park couldn't help and wonder, if Jonghyong would like to be in his place right now, under the hands of what's-his-name… Blake-Hyong. At the thought anger and a terrible dislike drilled into the brain, making bit lip so hard, that could feel blood on the tip of the tongue. Park clenched his free hand into a fist, digging his neat nails into the inside of his palm, to control his renewed anger. When will this madness end? The stuffiness, the crowd, the ear-splitting music, the self-confident Master, his obedient submissive, the sight of blood mixed with drops of sweat, the long and languid moans, and most importantly, the reactions of Jonghyong – all this caused such aggression in Jungsuk, that the young man did not know, was to release his negative emotions. He trusted Jonghyong, unquestionably. He knew that junior hadn't visited his Master in months. He knew, that Jonghyong was addicted to all this. He knew, what he was getting into when he agreed to attend today's meeting. He knew, what he was getting into when he decided to get close to Jonghyong in the first place. And didn't regret it. What Jungsuk couldn't have predicted, was his own reaction to Jonghyong's behavior, when meeting his former Master. What Jungsuk couldn't have predicted, was meeting this narcissistic and pompous jerk, who was now standing on the stage and continuing to expertly cut after cut to a young guy, who was openly enjoying it. Jungsuk couldn't have predicted, that he would become jealous of everything, that had once connected Jonghyong and his Master. And, it seems, to still bind! After all, it was only now that Jungsuk fully realized, that this man knew his boyfriend much better than he did. And Jonghyong trusted and probably still trusts him a lot more than he trusts Jungsuk.

The performance ended calmly and without unnecessary applause, for the need not to provoke unnecessary emotions for Top and his bottom. Jungsuk didn't even know when the stage was empty. He seemed to close his eyes for a second, then opened them in the opposite corner of the room, nervously clutching a glass of wine in his right hand, while Jonghyong bounced enthusiastically on the spot, unable to control the adrenaline, that was raging in his receptive nature. Jonghyong was saying something to Jungsuk, occasionally touching рis hand lightly and unobtrusively, but Park didn't hear him. He found himself scanning the crowd for about twenty minutes, searching with his sharp, now predatory eyes for the very person, who had caused the blood to flow so strongly to his temples.

"I need to depart. Can you stay here without me for a while?" Jonghyong's excited voice finally caught Jungsuk's attention, and he nodded weakly, pulling a radiant, more unnatural smile over his lips.

Jonghyong immediately caught the change in Hyong's mood. He's been acting weird ever since the action started. And Kim couldn't help and asked Hyong about it. But for every similar question, Jungsuk answered the same thing, "I'm fine". Jonghyong did not like such behavior of Park. Junior felt in his gut, that something was wrong. Jungsuk was always open with him and asked maknae to do the same. But now senior was not himself. Of course, could put it down to uncertainty or slight oblivion after the picture presented before eyes. After all, Kim immediately realized, that the idea of today's meeting was not exactly to Jungsuk's taste. But senior was determined to try it out, especially, as a gift to junior. But Jonghyong was still concerned about the senior's reaction. He was so tense, that the air space surrounding him could be cut with a knife, just as Blake-Hyong had done just half an hour ago. But Jungsuk smiled again, turning his full body to junior, and suddenly took hold of Kim's wrists, squeezing harder, than the circumstances required. In a certain context, Jonghyong would have liked it. He generally liked, when Hyong got off the chain, although it didn't happen often, because Jungsuk was still unsure of, what he could afford around Jonghyong. But now his grip felt, like steel, on the soft skin of his wrists, and his eyes were completely black, and maknae couldn't decide whether, to be happy or afraid.

"I'm fine," came the routine phrase. "I'll wait for you here. I remember the rules. Don't worry about me."

Jonghyong nodded, as if in a daze, but he realized, that Jungsuk was still holding his hands, not relaxing his grip, and the blackness of his eyes was gradually penetrating into the very soul, twining tight immaterial chains.

"Hyong, you're still holding my hand," Jonghyong whispered.

Jungsuk let go of maknae's wrists as suddenly, as he had gripped them, and Jonghyong suddenly felt a wild urge to rub them with his fingers, to get rid of the pain, that was caused by other's clinging hands.

As Jonghyong slipped away into the crowd, Jungsuk closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to pull himself together. He was so fixated on his jealousy and insecurities, that it threatened to spill over to the uncomprehending junior. Park gave himself a mental kick. He would have liked to leave this place, as he had never done before, to get some life-saving oxygen and clear his head.

"Good afternoon."

Jungsuk flinched at the greeting. That calm voice with a hint of hoarseness, slightly whistling at the sibilants, made him goosebumps from head to toe. Jungsuk turned to the source of the sound, preparing to bow in respect and greeting, but froze in place like a statue, when he saw the fox's eyes the color of bitter chocolate. A minty fringe fell over his forehead, just covering his eyebrow, and his face was pale, almost white. Now the man was wearing casual clothes: jeans with slightly worn knees, a light T-shirt, and a casual windbreaker, which made the young man look more like a follower of European culture. Blake, damn you, Hyong!

Senior tilted his head to the side, narrowing his eyes a little, and Jungsuk immediately checked himself, bowing, pausing in that position a moment, and then saw a restrained response.

"Sonbae-nim," Jungsuk couldn't address to senior by his first name, even though he knew him, because it would be wrong to make Jonghyong like a talker. Blake-Hyong could see, that Jungsuk had come with him, but even so, Park didn't take any chances.

"What's your name?" man lowered his head to the other side, studying Jungsuk's face without malice as if checking for emotions. And, to tell the truth, it annoyed Park terribly.

"Jessy," Jungsuk caught himself in time, using his established alias instead of his real name.

"I'm Blake," senior suddenly held out his hand to Park, and Jungsuk had no choice, but to shake it back, even though he didn't want to.

"Can I help You, sonbae-nim?"

"You can call me Hyong," Blake said, folding his arms and smiling out of the corner of his mouth. "I think, we have a lot more in common than you think."

"I don't understand You," Jungsuk didn't know, what to do with his hands, so he stuffed them into the pockets of his own leather trousers.

"John. You came with him, right?" man's voice didn't change. There was no threat in it, no desire to humiliate or offend. The most simple question.

"That's right," Jungsuk felt a twinge of jealousy stir inside him again. Senior irritated him, even though Jungsuk could see him even better now, when he was up close, and could literally feel the power and strength of the man. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he understood, why Jonghyong felt such awe and admiration when he looked at this man. Even Park, who wasn't used to being completely submissive, and the opposite was a cocky, self-confident shithead, wanted to lower his eyes under this insistent chocolate gaze, even though senior's appearance didn't quite match his domineering nature.

"You understand, that's this not enough, right?" Blake gestured around the room. "You must not only come here but also learn that, what you see here."

"You don't…"

"I know my submissive very well."

"He's not Your submissive anymore!" Jungsuk was about to say 'my', but he restrained himself. First of all, it would sound damn stupid and corny. Second, it wasn't true. Despite the interest in the topic, the study of practice, easy attempts to log in, Park was so far from, what Blake was doing today.

"I'm sorry, I didn't put it quite right," Blake nodded his head, expressing the extreme degree of apology. "But you must understand, Jessy, that you can't hold back his impulses forever. John went through a lot, to overcome the state of utter chaos, that he was in when I met him. If you really care about him, if your intentions are really serious, if you really want to help him, then," Blake pulled a small card out of his pocket and handed it to Jungsuk, "do that, what John couldn't do. Accept my help."

"What kind?" Jungsuk still had his hands in his pockets. He knew, that he was showing extreme disrespect to this man, but for some reason, he didn't care. Although senior didn't say anything offensive to him. On the contrary, there was a desire to help in his eyes. This surprised Jungsuk.

"I've suggested John take mentoring over his partner. That means, over you, as it turns out. But he refused. I don't know why. He can tell you that, what he told me. He can tell you, that he doesn't care. But you know, that's not true. John isn't the sick bastard, how he thinks himself. He's just a person with certain needs. He stopped our meetings, as you probably already know, but that doesn't mean, that he doesn't need them. And it's up to you to make this decision for him. Otherwise, the consequences may be devastating for both him and you. Take," Blake slowly held out his hand, to indicate, that he's going to get close to junior. Jungsuk shuddered at his proximity, but he stayed where he was. Senior put the card in the breast pocket of his shirt.

"Just call me, if you feel, that you need my help after all. Everyone faces this for the first time. I was in your shoes once. So I know exactly, how you feel right now."

"I don't think so," Jungsuk said almost through gritted teeth. Despite the fact, that the senior really sincerely offered to help, the very idea, that he would be a learner of this type, knocked the ground out from under his feet, made his head burst with pain, and anger beat like a tocsin on his temples.

"Perhaps," Blake nodded. "I did it for myself in my time. You're doing this for your partner. That's why your goals are so much nobler than mine."

Jungsuk raised his eyebrows in surprise. Unfortunately, this senior was very perceptive and could literally catch every thought, that was not yet spoken out loud.

"I'm good at recognizing people. You have the makings of, what John needs. But it takes practice, that you can't get on any website, in any article, or in any stupid movie. Even here," Blake is again looking around the room, "It's still not enough."

"Why would You do that?" Jungsuk copied Blake's actions, cocking his head to the side, which amused the man. Park watched in surprise as senior's lips parted in a harmless, natural smile, revealing a row of white teeth and an upper gum. The first impression of this sonbae made it impossible to think, that he could express his emotions so sincerely and openly. But at the same time, the man's face became serious, and his smile faded.

"Because I know, what it's like to not be, like everyone else. I know, how John suffered in his time. What he went through. What he sacrificed. What he experienced. I don't want, that it to come back again. And you can help with that. If, of course, you really want to."

Blake bowed his head in a gesture of farewell and left as quietly, as he had arrived, not even waiting for junior to respond.

Jungsuk stood where he was and couldn't understand, what he was feeling. On the one hand, an inner voice suggested, that it would be prudent and correct to seek help from a senior, given his motives. On the other hand, cursed jealousy and a sense of powerlessness, mixed with dissatisfaction with his own incompetence, made him so angry, that he wanted to beat his head against the wall. Park's ambitious nature was stung by the man's offered patronage, and it made him want to vent his anger on something, that he wouldn't feel so helpless and weak. All the old confidence had evaporated, and Jungsuk felt like an inexperienced youngster, wringing his fingers and biting his lip in shame, in a circle of experienced ajossi, who constantly corrected his uncertain and incorrect actions.

Jonghyong arrived after another ten minutes, during which Park managed to eat his brain with a teaspoon. As he turned his attention to the still agitated and definitely happy junior, Jungsuk felt an avalanche of anger inside him, which covered him with a new force, not allowing him to get to the surface and inhale life-saving oxygen. Maknae's eyes glowed, making the usual brown color almost olive, and a smile never left his beautiful, moist lips. The gestures became more frequent and involuntary, which Park didn't normally notice. The sight of such a junior would no doubt have moved him, or even made him want to. But right now for some reason, maknae's agitation was irritating.

All the way home Jungsuk was silent, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles were white. Jonghyong could sense senior's tension, but he couldn't figure out the reason for this behavior. Jungsuk was not himself. He didn't talk to him, only occasionally responding to junior's comments, pressing his tongue against his cheek irritable irritatingly, as Kim sometimes did himself, his eyes were empty, looking only at the road in front of him, his hands straining to grip, the steering wheel, again and again, his breathing heavy and drawn, his lips pursed into a thin line, that was unusual their usual plumpness. Jungsuk's whole posture spoke of outright annoyance. But the worst part is, that Jungsuk was silent. And this silence did not bode well. A chill ran down Jonghyong's spine, but he tried to ignore it. Senior was always reasonable and sane, kind and gentle towards him, so Kim touched Hyong's shoulder without a second thought when they arrived at his apartment.

"Hyong, will you tell me, what happened?"

Jonghyong was taken aback, when Jungsuk carefully and gently, but… removed maknae's hand from his shoulder. In Kim's memory, Park had never, ever done that. And it hurt somewhere inside, near the heart.

"Nothing, Jonghyong. I told you. Just tired, I guess."

"Yes? I don't think so!" Jonghyong suddenly got angry, as he and Hyong went up to his apartment. He walked around senior in circles, trying to get him to tell him, what was bothering him so much. What did maknae do wrong? After all, he offered to cancel the meeting, so why the hell is Hyong acting like a resentful child now?! Jonghyong wasn't very patient, and now, after an adrenaline rush and an endorphin attack, he was even more sensitive. But this sensitivity instead of a pleasant aftertaste left a shitty residue because of this behavior of Hyong. And senior's annoyance was also transmitted to Jonghyong.

Jungsuk remained silent, staring blankly at the door, as he fumbled in his pockets for the fucking apartment key.

"What the hell is going on with you?!"

"Stop shouting," Jungsuk said calmly, but threateningly, as he turned the key, he had finally found in the lock. His voice sounded more out of character than ever, and Jonghyong hesitated a little at first but decided not to back down. There was some obvious nonsense going on with senior, and Kim was determined to find out exactly, what it was. After all, Hyong always called him to what, that they should… talk. Tell each other everything, to be able to solve any kind of problem, come to a logical conclusion, find a way out of any situation. This is the essence of a trusting relationship, right?

"Fuck you, Park Jungsuk!" Jonghyong got really angry, walked away from the apartment, and folded his arms. Hyong continued to ignore him, even after so many attempts to talk and find out, what was bothering him. This angered the younger guy so much, that he could feel, how the rage rising from the very depths of his dirty gut, overflowing, and Jungsuk was standing in the path of this avalanche.

"What the fuck happened to you? I told you to stay home, damn it! I suggested, that you refuse to attend this session if you feel uncomfortable. I tried to shut you out of all this! I warned you, that this would happen. So, why the fuck are you acting like a total bitch, keeping your mouth shut and ignoring me?!"

"Shut up!" Jungsuk hissed, as he was right next to junior and grabbed his arm. Jonghyong was shouting too loudly, and there was a chance, that someone might have overheard their conversation. Jungsuk dragged maknae into the apartment, but Kim resisted and tried to push Hyong away from him, but the latter held him tightly and still pushed him into the hallway, closing the door behind him.

"Are you crazy?!" Park raised his voice now, that they were alone in his apartment. "You want, that everyone to hear, what we're doing, damn it?!"

"Are you shy of me?!" Jonghyong moved closer, looming over senior, like never before. The muscles in his arms tightened, making every blue vein stand out clearly. His breath was so heavy and hot, that it burned his face. His lips curled in dislike, and his eyes glittered with righteous anger.

"What, don't want, that anyone to know, that you're messing with a sick bastard, like me, hah? Are you sorry, that generally came near me? And I warned you! I told you, it would be like this! I told, that you couldn't be around someone, like me."

Jungsuk felt as if he had been punched in the gut. Gave a mental slap, that made cheeks burn like hell. Slapped him hard on the back of the head, making his head spin and his vision blurry. This was the first time in almost a year of their relationship a quarrel of such a large scale. Of course, he and Jonghyong sometimes argued and bickered with each other, but it was more of a mock duel than a real scandal. And now to see such junior in front of was… painful, offensive, unpleasant. Jungsuk remembered their conversation a year ago, at Jonghyong's last birthday party, when junior had pushed him away just as hard and fiercely, hurled insults at him, and tried to trample himself into the dirt, to prove, that Jungsuk couldn't be around him. Wouldn't be able to stand the shit, that would fall on him, if he got involved with a type, like Kim Jonghyong. If Jungsuk had felt a wish to be protective and helpful then, all, he felt now, was resentment and anger. Didn't he do enough, to prove his loyalty and closeness to junior, didn't he do enough, to make junior feel comfortable around him, wasn't he good enough for him?! Is he the only one, who needs this relationship? Does Jonghyong want, what Park wants, so badly? It's not fair, is it, to demand nothing in return, while giving all of yourself?

"And who can?" the words came out faster than Park could think them out, but he just couldn't hold it in any longer. Jonghyong had hurt him more, than ever before, and Blake-Hyong had hurt his ego. It all rolled into one huge snowball, that threatened to crush Park to a pulp.

"What…" Jonghyong suddenly stiffened at the strange question. He didn't know, what Jungsuk was asking him. What did he do wrong?

"Who's can be around someone, like you, hm?" Jungsuk pressed on, and the younger guy gave up under the sudden attack, retreating into the room, even though he had just been spitting venom, like a сobra, and looming over the seemingly diminutive senior, like a rock. But Hyong's sudden change of mood scared Jonghyong. He felt, how the fear, that had been dormant in the back of his mind for a long time and had not manifested itself, up and raise its ugly head, twisting in a grin, ready to attack.

"Maybe, someone, like this your Blake, huh? I saw, how he looked at you. How you looked at him! You were literally eating him with your eyes. And do you know, what that look is? Submission! You were ready to jump on stage and have him cut you up, like a pig, and you didn't care about me, right?!"

"Hyong, are you…" Jonghyong suddenly had an idea and opened his eyes in disbelief, "jealous of me?"

"Does it seem so strange to you, hah? That a person, who seeks the location, and most importantly, the trust of his partner for God knows how long, can be jealous of his ex, especially, when he 'so' looks at him! I got the impression, that just a little bit more and you'll cum in your pants just from looking at this your…" Jungsuk winced, not even wanting to say senior's name. This man didn't do anything to him, on the contrary, offered to help him, despite the fact, that Jonghyong literally abandoned him, replacing him with another guy. Either this Blake is so masterful with himself, or he's just a nut, who doesn't care, who to replace.

"Hyong, this is stupid. You must understand, that this is inevitable. We show up at the club quite often, and we just can't avoid everyone, you don't like. And Yumin-Hyong is no exception. I'm surprised, that we haven't met him before. After all, he often attends such events."

"You…" Jungsuk started to say something, but the name, that Jonghyong uttered, suddenly made him freeze in place with his mouth open.

"You don't have to be jealous of Yumin-Hyong. I told you, that I haven't seen him in a long time. He was the one, who offered to tell you the truth about our sessions. He was the one, who offered to help me as a mentor for you, but I refused and…"

Jonghyong continued to say something, in the heat of passion not noticing, that Hyong was silent and glaring at junior's face. If Jungsuk thought, that he had become uncomfortable just recently, he was mistaken. After junior just said this name Park felt, how a sharp pain shoots through his body like an arrow, passing through. The suspicion, that Park had been trying not to think about for several hours, now crept into his subconscious with renewed force, and Jungsuk couldn't take it anymore.

"What did you say?" Jungsuk saw, how a whole spectrum of emotions sweep across Jonghyong's agitated face, and in a panic he starts backing away from him again, unconsciously moving towards the bed, while Park is closing in on him, following the same path almost trail to trail, as if a predator is cornering its prey.A

A shadow of fear crossed Jonghyong's face, but he tried to pull himself together, "I was saying, that you shouldn't act like this, because…"

"No," Jungsuk cut him off abruptly and suddenly grabbed his wrist so hard, that Kim winced in pain and tried to pull his arm out of the iron grip, but was defeated. No matter, how much Jungsuk had trained, to bring his body to mind-blowing perfection, Jonghyong was still bigger and stronger, than him, but now for some reason, maknae felt, that he couldn't resist the strong hands, and most importantly, the senior's gaze, which literally pinned him to the spot. Jungsuk was angry. Very angry. Angry at Jonghyong!

"What did you call your Master just now, Jonghyong?" Jungsuk's voice was almost breaking, threatening to turn into a choked rasp. He didn't even think about hurting Jonghyong. It was as if his body had become so strong and unyielding in an instant, that Park could move mountains with his bare hands.

"You said, that your Master's name was Blake, right?"

In a matter of seconds, Jonghyong realized, what had happened. He said Blake-Hyong's real name! And Jungsuk caught it right away. After all, Jonghyong himself explained to him, that the club uses only aliases, to comply with the privacy policy. If partners exchange real names, it means only one thing: either in real life, they are connected by something more, than what they visit the club for, or they are so close, that they revealed their real names.

"Right?!" Jungsuk raised his voice and tightened his grip on maknae's wrist, which made Jonghyong gasp, unable to pull his hand away again. Jungsuk's touch burned like a hemp rope pulled too tight.

"Yes," Kim realized, that there was no point in lying. Jungsuk had already heard all, that was needed.

"Then why did you call him something else?" Jungsuk hoped, that Jonghyong would come up with some excuse. Tell him something, that will refute his suspicions and guesses. Jungsuk desperately tried to control his anger of jealousy and his own hurt at the realization, that he was useless to Jonghyong. Jungsuk suddenly felt unnecessary, unable to reach the level of trust, that was established even now between Jonghyong and a complete stranger. Kim didn't know much about this senior, but the trust between the two of them was beyond belief. There was no other way to explain it. Jonghyong trusted the stranger more than him.

"That's his real name."

Everything swam before eyes, smoke threatened to pour out of ears, legs felt heavy, and there was such a powerful explosion inside, that Jungsuk could barely stand still, putting himself back together literally in parts. His guess was confirmed, and he immediately said it out loud, feeling something dirty, sticky, and black creep right into his soul, envelopes, burns, compresses with barbed wire, demanding release. His anger demanded freedom.

"Did you sleep with him?"

This question hit the awareness worse, than any lash on a wounded back. Jonghyong saw, the blackness blotting out the irises of other's eyes, felt, the fingers on his wrist grow cold, felt the proximity of other man frighten and pressing him, causing a rush of panic.

"I…"

"Did you fuck with him or not, damn it?!" Jungsuk's voice was a few tones higher, making the young man almost deafen himself. But the sight of this Jonghyong just made him mad. The guy quieted and lowered his head obediently, trembling all over.

"Yes."

"Fuck!" Jungsuk pushed Jonghyong away from him so hard, that he fell back on the bed, wincing at the pain in his legs, as they hit about the frame.

"Fucking shit, damn it, Jonghyong! You slept with him, damn it! You fucked with your Master. You told me, that you weren't sleeping with him!" Jungsuk paced back and forth in front of the bed, trying to put this in his head. He had worked so long and hard, to win Jonghyong's favor, so carefully and hard to make his way to junior, just to kiss him, not to mention intimacy, and this type was fucking him?! Jonghyong was fucking with a man! Of course, in the few years, that he'd spent with this man, Jonghyong might not have felt as much fear of Blake-Yumin, as he did of Park, but fuck, junior had assured him, that he hadn't slept with Blake, since he'd started attending his sessions. That their relationship was based only on action and had nothing to do with sex. Then what the hell?!

"It was only once, I swear!" Jonghyong started to get up from the bed, but, seeing the righteous anger, that possessed his Hyong, decided to stay out of his way, or better yet, shrink to microscopic size, so he remained in a semi-recumbent position. "We didn't meet then! You were so insistent on spending around me, that I was afraid. I was afraid, that couldn't handle myself. But when I finally decided to talk…

"You want to say, that sleep with him, just to know, if you could do it with me?!"

Damn it, fucking Park Jungsuk was too smart and insightful. Or maybe, he really was the devil and could read fucking minds.

"Yes…"

Jungsuk ran his trembling hands through his hair, ruffling it. He couldn't believe, that his ears had just heard something like this. This was the most stupid and ill-considered decision, in his opinion. The anger and resentment didn't want to let go, and Jungsuk wished with all his heart, that he could let go of those nasty feelings inside. Most of all he wanted to smash something to pieces, something heavy, with a loud scream. He didn't know, what he wanted more: to banish Jonghyong and wash himself of everything, he had just heard, or to claim junior completely, as he deserved. And this time, the sensible Jungsuk lost the battle.

Park took a deep breath and went to the bedside table. Jonghyong watched him closely, unable to do anything. Park's mood changed again. He became quiet and focused in a second, which at the moment scared maknae terribly.

Jungsuk took out the handcuffs, that he and Jonghyong sometimes used for their simple games, and chuckled. Such a simple device must not have caused junior any satisfaction. After all, he did much more refined things with his body.

"Hyong, what are you…"

"Quiet," senior said calmly.

Jonghyong immediately bit his tongue. The recent argument had taken aback, take place to fear, but Kim couldn't deny, that adrenaline was pumping through his veins, like never before, and the sight of senior, frowning and concentrating, sent goosebumps all over his body, making his cock twitch treacherously in his pants. Jonghyong always wanted to try to make Jungsuk lose his temper, and it seems, that today he succeeded.

Jungsuk threw the handcuffs, along with lube and condoms, on the bed next to Jonghyong, looking, like he was going to perform surgery, instead of having sex. His actions, and most importantly, his face did not express anything. All emotions disappeared from this beautiful face. All, that remained, was a cold concentration and a blackness in his eyes. Despite the excitation, that slowly, but surely spread through the body, causing not only a member pulsing, but and nipples to strain, skin crawl, lips dry, why the tongue ran along the lower, and then at the top, in an attempt to moisten with saliva, and unpleasant drone to capture the hearing, Jonghyong felt fear. The sight of Jungsuk scared him. This is what his ex looked like before another crazy idea. But Jungsuk isn't like that, right? He would never hurt Jonghyong in a way, that he couldn't handle…

"Lie on your stomach."

"Hyong…"

"On the stomach," the second sentence was a clear command. And Jonghyong didn't dare disobey, feeling, a wave of excitement pass through all the receptors, making him bite his lip treacherously, despite the fear of the unknown.

Jonghyong meekly turned on his stomach, his back to Jungsuk on the bed, and Park snorted at the submission. Like this junior was putting himself under his Master? Like this, he listened to him implicitly? Maybe, even moaned during sex with him the same way, he moans under Jungsuk every fucking time, when senior slowly and carefully stretch his fingers, despite their small size, easily finding a sensitive ball of nerves. Did Jonghyong moan just as loud and long, when not Jungsuk, and this type was fucking him? Did call out his name during orgasm too? Maybe, Jonghyong was riding on him, while Blake's long, strong fingers held junior's hips. Maybe, senior takes him from behind, pulling his hair back with force, leaving ringing and heavy slaps on his rounded, pumped-up ass? Or maybe, Blake wouldn't let him cum, and Jonghyong was whining and begging, like a last whore. How many times has the other's cock actually been up this guy's ass?

All these questions flashed through Jungsuk's mind, backed up by clear images of, what was happening, and Park felt, dirty arousal literally scald him along with anger, his cock bloodshot in his tight leather trousers, and a growl burst from his throat. Jonghyong jerked on the bed when he heard the sound, which only made Jungsuk angrier more. He almost jumped on top of junior with the handcuffs in his hands, which made maknae gasp in surprise and suddenly start twisting his body around, as Park fastened him to the head of the bed.

"Why do you resist?" Jungsuk hissed in an unctuous voice on maknae's ear and noticed, how it immediately turned red. "You like, when you being hurt, right?"

Jonghyong let out a ragged breath, leaning his ass against Jungsuk's thighs, but the latter immediately rose above maknae, leaving him lying face down on the bed with his hands cuffed.

"That's what you wanted, right?" with one sharp tug Jungsuk pulled off pants and boxers at junior, hearing, the fabric crack at the seams and the zipper seem to break. Jonghyong gasped again. He had no idea, what Jungsuk was really feeling right now.

"You wanted, that I to be rude to you."

Jungsuk unbuckled the belt of his trousers and pulled it out of the loops with a loud, distinctive sound. The sight of maknae's bare and so clean ass made him let out his breath noisily.

"Today I'll show you, how rude I can be. Especially, when you're lying to me!"

Before could say a word, Jonghyong felt the stinging pain of the belt, hitting him hard on both buttocks. He couldn't help and let out a long moan, clenching his hands into fists and bringing his legs together, causing his hemispheres to clench as well. Jungsuk never spanked him without prior preparation, always stroked and prepared the tender skin, and never, ever used a belt! Park knew, how terrified Jonghyong was at the sight of this item of clothing if it wasn't used for its intended purpose. This might seem strange. Jonghyong has tried such heavy devices on himself, that just looking at them makes shiver. But it was the belt that he was most afraid of. The old scars from the item still remained on his back, and even lashing or whipping could not cover them with their variety. After all, Blake-Hyong always acted professionally. But the former partner Jonghyong got special pleasure from whipping junior with belts of different sizes and widths. And as soon as Jonghyong imagined this device in the hands of his Master, he was shaking from a panic attack. Therefore, Blake immediately excluded this item from the list, so as not to undermine the psychological state of maknae.

Jonghyong tried to twitch to free his hands, but the metal handcuffs held him tight, squeezing his wrists harder each time when he kicked particularly hard.

Jungsuk hit him again with the belt, this time with even more force, and Kim felt, how a pleasant wave of excitement leave his body, leaving place for a chilling horror. He knew, what it was, like to be flogged. Therefore, he was well aware, that he would not last long from such a punishment. He wriggled on the bed, crying out every damn time when a leather belt with a heavy buckle landed on his ass. His hemispheres burned with burning and wild pain, and Jungsuk didn't react to the younger guy's whining and moaning, as he did before, always picking up on the slightest change in maknae's mood. It seemed to Jonghyong, that Park felt something akin to pleasure at, what he was doing to him now. And it sent a new wave of panic into the already fragmented brain.

Jungsuk watched the light skin turn purple-red with each new stroke of the belt, the two cross-stripes clearly reflected on the white canvas, the skin slicing through the air with each new swing, the body twitching, and from somewhere above he could almost hear maknae's screams. But Jungsuk didn't stop. He settled into a more comfortable position next to junior, lifting the belt higher every damn time, hitting harder, causing his skin to bruise blood-red, swell, and even turn blue in places, but Park continued to throw blow after blow, having lost count for a long time. His anger wouldn't let up. It wasn't enough for him. Too little. It was as if he was mad and couldn't stop. The hand moved by itself, as if without his participation.

Junior's heart-rending scream still caught his attention. Jonghyong was shouting so loudly, that he was almost hoarse. His hands were constantly moving from side to side on the headboard of the bed, trying to throw off the handcuffs. His legs were twitching as if wanted to push senior off, but Hyong sat firmly and assuredly, not going to stop there. He wasn't finished yet.

"Jungsuk…" senior's name came out unconsciously, almost in oblivion. The throat was raw and hoarse from shouting, wet trails of tears ran down to the bed, hands ached from the tight grip of the metal, whole body ached and twisted into a tourniquet, and ass just burned with fire. Jonghyong didn't feel his buttocks from the word "completely". His skin in that place was now nothing but a piece of fresh meat. He couldn't take it anymore. He was in more pain than words can describe. Jungsuk never did that to him. He always listened to junior, if he didn't like something. But no matter, how much maknae called out to him, Jungsuk didn't react, just continued to beat him up, feeling nothing, but anger. Hot tears continued to trickle down his cheeks at the realization of, what was happening behind him. Jonghyong gathered his remaining strength and tried again, "Jungsuk… please, enough. Stop…"

And suddenly the blows really stopped. Kim was already glad as much, as his shattered mind and equally battered body would allow, but it wasn't there. Hearing the click of the lube cap behind him, Jonghyong cringed in fear and tried to jerk his arms or legs again, in a pathetic attempt to stop this madness. Without results. His body wasn't listening. Pain in the fifth point spread to all extremities, capturing sensitive receptors. Jonghyong didn't have the strength to resist any longer.

"What's wrong with you?" Jungsuk's low and angry voice reached Kim's ear. "Isn't that, how you like to be treated? Beaten to distraction. Fucked to the point of grinding teeth. Taken dirty and hard, like the last whore, isn't that right, Jonghyong-a, hah?"

The usual affectionate form of the name, which always had a calming effect on the mind, but now it hurts to hear. The fear, that relaxed mind had almost forgotten, returned with a new deafening force. And the cold lube, casually poured on the buttocks, caused a hell of a pain to the hot, damaged skin. The ass was burning mercilessly, and the seemingly salutary coolness only increased the effect. Jonghyong jerked against the pain, but Jungsuk held him back, by grabbing his buttocks with his fingers, which made Jonghyong yell out loud.

Jungsuk took hold of the hemispheres with the fingers of one hand, ignoring junior's heart-rending cry of pain, and spread them apart, noticing, how the red swollen skin immediately turned white from the pressure of his palms, using his free hand to pour the lubricant, getting not only on the compressed ring of muscles but also on the skin and bed linen.

"Jungsuk, no!" Jonghyong screamed again, as he felt rough fingers in his sphincter. "Please, no, stop!" but the man's hands continued to tear at him, fingers penetrating deeper and deeper, causing terrible pain to the unprepared passage, without slowing down at all, acting rough and hard. Jonghyong already knew, what senior was going to do to him. And this caused a panic attack to completely engulf his consciousness. The body began to convulse, arms and legs began to shake on the bed, anus involuntarily shrank, rejecting the alien inside. But it wasn't enough. Jonghyong couldn't throw off Hyong, who was sitting next to him, no matter how hard he tried. Fear was like an icy vise, forcing to lie still, only making pathetic attempts. Panic was seizing muscles, taking away remaining strength. All, could do, was shiver and clench, sweating clammy and cold.

Jungsuk did not waste time on a long stretch, lowered his pants and boxers below the knees, put a condom on a stake standing cock and, covered Jonghyong with his body, he pushed almost halfway inside the hot interior, causing another fit of junior's deafening scream. His cock entered tight and hard, the undeveloped walls squeezing him from the inside, bringing pain, but Jungsuk continued to wedge into maknae's body, clutching his torn buttocks, feeling the swollen bands with his fingers, along with the wet and sticky substance. Blood. Dark cinnabar formed on the places, where the skin was pressed with the fingers especially hard. Jungsuk could feel the heat. His cock was clamped in a vise inside the anus, and his own thighs touched the hot skin of junior's ass when Park was completely inside. Jonghyong kept shouting and calling for him. But Jungsuk didn't hear. He pushed once. Then the second. The third, fifth, tenth. The euphoria of having other's body drowned him. Other's stifled moans and now hoarse screams stirred the consciousness. The stickiness on his hands made it impossible to hold on to the skin, which made his fingers constantly slip, and Park wrapped them around others' buttocks, again and again, watching, how the red hue turns to white.

"Seagull! Seagull! Seagull!" Jonghyong was shouting out his safety word, which he and Jungsuk had agreed to use. But that didn't stop senior. The horror of what was happening made it impossible for Jonghyong to even relax, just to wait for, when Jungsuk to get enough of the situation. It was twisted in an arc, twisted, squeezed, broken. Jonghyong was literally collapsing inside and out. He didn't even feel Hyong's precise thrusts on his prostate. Only the pain in the damaged buttocks and the heat of skin-to-skin contact. The fallen member rubbed against the surface of the linen, causing a new portion of pain. All of Jonghyong was now like a raw nerve: where don't touch it, it hurts like hell.

"You like it, right?" an angry whisper seared his ear, as the other's cock continued to rape the passage, almost ripping through the tender inner walls. "You like spending your time like this, hah, Jonghyong-e? Is this how you prefer to solve your problems?" each sentence was accompanied by a sharp and deep push, and the strength to scream was gone. Jonghyong only moaned painfully, closing his eyes and biting his lip. Hyong wasn't listening to him. Hyong had hurt him. Hyong literally raped him. And oddly enough, Jonghyong felt guilty about it. He deserved it. This was the way to treat him.

"Did I ask for so much?" Jungsuk continued his interrogation, feeling, how maknae's body melt into a shapeless puddle beneath him, becoming soft and pliable, inside him was wet and burn, despite the use of the contraceptive, and the heat under the skin of his thighs.

"I asked you to just trust me. And you're at the mercy of others' hands. Whereas I was just an annoying senior to you. And even now you don't trust me completely!" despite his anger, Jungsuk could feel, how the spasm of impending orgasm rising. Jonghyong's body was so big and powerful, and strong, that, if he wanted to, he could lift him up in his arms without much effort, or throw him off easily, but he was lying like a limp doll under such an elegant and seemingly weak-looking Jungsuk. And it was so intoxicating, that wanted to tear him whole, mark every part of his body, brand him with the name of Park. To let everyone know, that this strong, cheeky guy belongs only to Jungsuk. That only with Jungsuk he could be so submissive and pliable. Only Jungsuk can allow himself to be treated with him like this.

Park groaned in his throat, as he felt, how the orgasm washes over him, forcing him to speed up. His toes curled, his hands gripped bloody buttocks harder, and his teeth sank into the back of the dark-haired junior's neck. The sperm gushed out in such a powerful stream, that even though the condom, Jungsuk could clearly feel it. Park leaned against Jonghyong's back, breathing hard, recovering from the stupefying release. But after a few moments he realized, that maknae wasn't moving. Don't scream or moan. At all. Standing up on his hands, trying to look into Jonghyong's face, Jungsuk called out in a hoarse voice, but junior didn't respond. He didn't even turn his head but continued to rest his forehead on the mattress. Somewhere in the subcortex, and unpleasant cold sensation began to drill. Jungsuk struggled out of Jonghyong and was horrified to see blood on the very head of the still-condom-wrapped member. And then the mind is shot. Park seemed to wake up from a dream. Goosebumps covered body. Hands and feet began to shake. And eyes widened so much, that was ready to fall out of their sockets, when Park saw, what the soft skin of his boyfriend's buttocks looked like. The blood on his own cock made him want to vomit, and he swallowed a nasty lump. He immediately rushed to the head of the bed, as he was: half-naked, with a condom on his, still standing cock, with his pants down, and buried his hands in his hair, pulling with such force, that a little more and will remove the scalp. The continuous stream of tears gushed from his eyes. Jungsuk gently turned Kim's head to the side, gently touching his face, having no idea, what to do next.

"Jonghyong-e! God, what have I done?"

Jungsuk stared at his boyfriend in horror and only fully realized, what he had done when understood, that Jonghyong wasn't reacting to him, because he had passed out.

Note:

*Hanky Code – a code system of signs, that serves to demonstrate sexual preferences and desires, consists in the use of handkerchiefs, bandanas, or other garments of various colors. At the same time wearing a scarf in the left pocket is the dominant role (Top), in the right – the passive role (bottom)