I do end up with a cast, John and Angie were waiting outside. Which I preferred since Angie was hovering over me, it was sweet but a little overwhelming.
The doctor was kind as he would gently move my foot about to assess the damage. My shoulder was sore but it didn't hurt as much as my ankle. The scraps and bruises were taken care of. The gash on my forehead had a bandage, the doctor said it was healing nicely. Which is surprising to me, I hadn't been healing that well lately.
"The crutches should help take some of the weight off of your ankle, when it heals a little better we can remove the cast."
"Okay," I tell him. I just wanted to get out of here.
I wanted to go and find Otto and make him pay every last bit of pain I was feeling, but I needed to heal fully before I can do any of that. I'll bid my time until I'm fully healed to deal with him and his pack. I also needed to find more about him in order to know what I'm up against.
I catch Dr. Colbert looking at me, he diverts his gaze to a chart next to him when I catch him.
"What's wrong?" I ask.
He shakes his head. Despite the obvious tired looked on his face he looked very young. His sandy blond hair and bight blue eyes, with a strong set jaw, made him look more like a swimwear model than a doctor. Then again what do I know.
"Nothing," he tries to give me a reassuring smile. He was obviously trying to look optimistic but his eyes just held this reserve. I should know, I had come to master that look. Trying to pretend everything is fine when indeed everything was burning down to hell.
I lived like that back in the city. I lived like that when I met the Holts.
"Doesn't seem like nothing, what aren't you telling me?"
I was getting worried that it might mean that I'm dying, that maybe there's no cure, that I'm on my last breath.
"If I'm being honest with you, I'm worried. You have this strong wolf in you but the strain of not bonding might be weakening it more. I'm not sure how much longer it might hold."
I take a deep breath. I knew as much. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It was first because I wasn't ready, now, well now it felt like I would be doing it to save myself and not because I was willing to try and give me and Ander a chance. It just didn't feel appropriate.
"I know," I tell him. It's all that I could say.
"If you're having doubts about Ander I can assure you he's not as bad as he seems. His heart is in the right place but he's going through some things and he's trying to do right by you."
I remember my conversation with Theo in how he's not sleeping because of me.
"How is he? Like really," I look at him. He seemed like he wouldn't tell me anything.
"I can't really talk about that with you." He smiled apologetically at me. He seemed nice enough but I really hated hospitals.
I nod my head. I'm much of an outsider as the Holts. Why would he tell me anything.
"I think we're done here, you should heal well enough in a few days." He looks at me before stepping outside to speak with the Burke's. He was downplaying my injuries and assuring them I was fine.
"How are you feeling?" John asks walking in.
"Like I could never return to this place."
He smiles as his eyes fill with worry. I really hated having to put them through this. I'm sure they just expected an easier and smoother ride in this guardianship thing.
Angie walks in and she tries to smile but it falters. She looked like she was about to break down. John hands me my crutches as I get down from the bed. "That's the last time I'll try meditating," I joke. She laughs but it comes out as a sob.
She hugs me in a crushing hold. As tiny as she was she really had strength. I hug her back as she just holds me for a minute. John stands idly by, as if he's trying to be there if I happen to fall.
Once Angie pulls away she takes a few deep breaths and walks out. I look at John but all he does is shrug. We follow her out as I try to get a hang on walking with crutches. It wasn't easy. Halfway I just wanted to through them aside and walk on my broken leg. John offered to carry me but I politely declined.
Getting in the high truck wasn't easy either. John had to help up and off it. I was really getting more and more anger for Otto which I'll hold onto whenever I see him again.
The stairs were no walk in the park either. I ended up sitting on the steps and dragging myself up like that. John was laughing as I would take my time going up. "You're still there?" he would say as he passed by every minute or so. I cheered once I got to the top to only realize I left my crutches at the bottom.
John ended up carrying me to my bed.
When John left me to go get my crutches which he set by my bed but they ultimately fell on the floor. I left them there. I had no use for them right now. I wasn't going to move from this spot.
My phone was completely gone now. It wouldn't even charge as it was dead. I tried to salvage the case but even that was cracked and broken.
I was shaking it by my ear when Mark came in. He looked at me with worry and confusion as I kept jiggling it.
"It's broken," I say.
"I can see that, what happened?"
"It fell and broke."
"Wait, you or your phone?"
"Both."
Mark nods as if he understands. I can see questions forming in his mind. I may might not know what he's thinking but I can see that he's dwelling over something.
"I-" he began. I knew from the looks of his face he was about to apologize.
"If you're going to apologize for something that neither one of us could have stopped from happening I'm going to ask you to kindly fuck off," I say, I raise my eyebrow when he doesn't move.
"What? No, I, fine." He says defeated. I pat the spot next to me. He comes to sit awkwardly at first but I just pull him closer.
"What happened?"
"I believed I could fly," I say seriously. Which only makes me laugh when Mark looks at me as I've finally lost it.
"Seriously, what happened?"
I could mess with him a little longer or I could be civil. I decide on the more appropriate one.
"Sucks to not know things, doesn't it?"
He flinches at my response. He shifts to be fully looking straight and no longer angled towards me. I know I hurt him with that. I know I did it on purpose as well. I did it for Bass. If I know Bass as I'd like to think I do, he has already forgiven them. As much as he is a force to be reckon with, Bass when it comes to family he's a softy. I know I'm taking liberties that aren't mine to take but I love Bass. I hate seeing him anything other than his goofball self.
"Vee," Mark whispers. He sounds tired.
"Have you spoken to Bass?"
Mark slowly nods. He's still not looking at me. Which makes me second guess myself for being so harsh on him.
"I was with him when just now but he told me to come see you instead. He said you had a little fall."
I snort. I knew Bass was going to put it as water under the bridge. He usually does.
"So he forgave you."
Mark gives me a sad smile as he nods once. He looked so torn and exhausted.
"I don't deserve either one of you," Mark sadly admits.
"Don't say that. If anything it's me that doesn't deserve any one of you. I'm just causing too many problems."
Mark looks at me in disbelief.
"Can you fix it?" I ask changing the subject. I had him the shattered phone.
"Did you dance on top of it?" Mark asses the damage.
"No, it flew with me."
Mark snorts. I know he really wants to push on finding out what happened to me but I couldn't bring myself to cause more problems. I can handle Otto, I hope.
"I'll get you another one."
"In that case never mind," I take the phone back, "I'll buy myself one later."
Mark snatches it back, "and let Maggie find out that I didn't replace it, no chance. She'd kill me."
As scary as Maggie can get she would never hurt any one of us. She loved us too much. She would get upset and that's a big no-no. She only wants the best for us, even in small luxuries like a phone.
"So what am I suppose to use now? To communicate."
"Your laptop," Mark says shoving the phone into his pocket.
I look at him in confusion for a minute before I realize that Maggie has also gotten me a laptop. I did not know where that was.
"You lost it already? Did you even use it?" Mark asks in disbelief.
I shrug because I have no clue if there even was a laptop. I really needed to spend more time here. Maybe even clean it up but I felt like I would take away the essence of it. This room was clearly for a child the Burke's wanted to have.
Mark pulls a drawer from the desk that I rarely use. It was supposed to be for me to do my work on but I usually do it in bed.
He pulls it out with its charger. It had a pink case with flowers decorating it.
I plug the charger where the nightlight used to be, I really wish they had kept it. It could get super dark in here sometimes.
I boot it up, "don't I need WiFi?"
"Maggie probably has that covered. She is thorough. Try texting me."
I open the message app and send a quick message to Mark.
Crickets chirp as he pulls his phone out. He snorts as he playfully pulls my hair.
"Ow, you jerk," I pretend it hurt.
"You sent me 'you suck', really?"
I smile sweetly at him. I end up yawning. I hadn't realize I was tired. I set the laptop on the nightstand.
"Your mate has been asking about you. I don't know how long I can avoid him."
I sit up straight. I look at Mark before I decide to sleep. I can talk to Ander later.
Mark holds me until sleep overtakes me.
I don't remember what I was dreaming or what caused me to awake but I knew it'll take me a while to go back to sleep. I was all alone. Turning the lamp on the nightstand I sit up in bed. My cast was itching and I hated it so bad. I tried scratching with a ruler but it didn't reach. I tried ignoring it but it grew itchier.
I grab the laptop with full intentions of getting Mark to come and break it off so I could scratch that itch.
ME: Mark?
As I wait for his response I surf the web. I look up articles on Chicago. I really missed being there. I also wonder what happened to Daniel, Mark said he showed up along with my former boss to the wake of my mother, but I hadn't felt in the mood to see people then.
I know some people showed up, neighbors that I would greet some times.
MARK: Yes?
ME: I need you to come over. This cast is going to be the end of me.
MARK: I can't. I'm busy.
Busy? I wanted to ask but I felt that if he wanted me to know what he was up to he would have said.
ME: Oh, I'll get Bass then.
MARK: Bass can't either. You're on your own for a bit babes. Maybe call your mate?
ME: Ha-ha you're so funny. You know he can't cross lines.
MARK: He can, in fact some of his pack mates can as well. We just have to know.
Well this is news to me. Then why the line if they can just waltz in here? Is that why Otto got through? I should warn them about them but then again he only seems to come after me.
ME: Not to alarm you, but you might to keep an eye on said line. For unwanted visitors.
MARK: Working on it. We're doing patrols because Bass said he smelled something close to you. Just be safe, okay?
ME: As long as you are.
Bass didn't tell him everything then. I smiled, he really can be my partner in crime. Which makes me believe he's only giving me time until he comes seeking answers himself.
Before I can back out I message Ander. Whose name was still the same.
ME: Hey.
Once I sent it, I regretted it. I should have waited to talk with him in person. I should be more open and honest if I was going to proceed with anything between us. I can feel my heart racing. It felt like impending doom, like I have done the worst thing possible.
MY LOVE: Here I thought you had blocked me. I was about to get another number and slip it with another name.
I snort. I wouldn't really doubt that. I would probably done the same.
ME: What would you have named it?
MY LOVE: As Mark's you'd call me right away. Maybe even a restaurant name so when you'd get hungry.
The food one I wouldn't have called I would probably delete it. I don't know why but calling strangers gives me anxiety. As for Mark's I would have called him.
ME: That'd mean you would have to change Mark's name.
MY LOVE: I would have put my name on his. You'd eventually call, right?
ME: I am texting you now, aren't I?
MY LOVE: True. What can I do for you?
ME: I was wondering if you're not busy you can come over.
MY LOVE: As much as I'd love that, you need sleep.
ME: I'll wait up for you. Please don't leave me hanging.
I close the laptop and rest my head on the wall. I don't know what compelled me to invite him like that. I guess if I really wanted to know how he was I needed to see him. At least I tell myself that.
I close my eyes for a bit as the itching continues to intensify. I really was going to rip it off. It was making me uncomfortable.
"So much for waiting up for me," Ander teases.
I open my eyes as he quickly turns around.
"I forgot my shades, sorry."
I had forgotten about that. I put the laptop on the nightstand as I turn the lamp off. The room got so much darker.
"I think it's okay now."
He slowly turns. I can't really see him but I can sense the tension in him. I pat the spot beside me so he can sit. I'm not sure if I wanted to spend the night talking or forcing him to sleep.
He bumps on the bed but manages to sit next to me with only a few minor incidents. I chuckled when he almost tripped completely when he stepped on my crutches.
"It's a lot harder than you think." He defends.
"I bet."
"So, hows it going? What's with the crutches?"
"I had a little fall, nothing to worry about."
"Something tells me I should be worried."
I reach for his hand, he relaxes a bit. I intertwine our fingers. I was much bolder here in the dark than I would be anywhere else.
"I think we should just sleep," I whisper.
"Are you sure?" He whispers back.
"Hold me?"
He shifts to a better position as I do the same. I turn to face the door putting my back to him. He lays looking up stiff as if he's avoiding touching me. I reach back searching for his hand, after unwillingly touching his stomach and chest I manage to find it. We laugh as I had managed to grab everything but his hand.
I make him turn so he can face my back. I wrap his arm around me as I hug it to me. I interlace our fingers as I clutch him closer to me. He shifts so his front is touching my back. He places his head near mine, where I can feel his hot breath. I stay awake holding him as I await the sounds confirming he was indeed asleep. I stay awake hearing his breathing, I can feel his chest rise and fall, I concentrate on his heartbeat. I let it all rock me to sleep.
I had my head on top of his chest as his heartbeat soothes me as I sleep. I not sure how we got in that position but I did not want to move from it. I hug him tight as I move my head more closer to his heart. I can feel his arm around me but I don't mind it.
When Ander shifts I try to hold him tighter but the itch on my leg returns with vengeance.
I groan as I awake. I lift my head so I can glare at the cast. I hear a small laugh as I look at Ander. He's smiling but his eyes are closed.
Now in the light of the morning sun I can see the dark circles under his eyes. He really looked as he barely got some sleep. I reach out for his face as I gently touch his eyes. I slowly caress him guiding the back of my finger down to his cheek as I slowly go to trace his lips. He smiles as he leans into my touch.
"You should sleep more," he tells me.
"I was thinking the same, about you."
"I'm okay, I'm built different so I can handle it." He's trying to reassure me but I'm not having it.
"It's still early we can sleep a little longer," I tell him.
He shakes his head, "I have to get going, I have to report for duty."
He really was straining himself. He looked so tired. I can feel it.
"Whatever you're doing for me please stop. It's not worth having you push yourself like this," I whisper. I couldn't trust my voice.
He smiles, "you're worth everything. Don't worry about me. Just try and get better, okay?" He leans towards me as if to kiss me but stops himself. I wince as the memory of me pulling away when he last tried to kiss me comes back. I lean towards him, he stiffens but soon relaxes as I kiss the edge of his lips.
"Can we talk? Just you and me, whenever you're available." I ask hesitantly.
"Of course, how about later today. I can come over again."
"Okay, yeah that works."
He keeps his eyes closed the whole time. I reluctantly let him go as he gets up. Putting his shoes on he stops by the window. Still having his back to me he says goodbye and jumps out. I flop back in bed. I really needed to get a hold of myself.
The itch was driving me insane. Angie caught me trying to cut it with scissors. I had to assure her that I wasn't to touch it again. That I'll leave it as it's helping me heal. Once satisfied with my promise she leaves to get me breakfast. I was about to protest but she was long gone.
I guess I'll just stay here, I tell myself.
Angie returns with a tray full of food. Before I could even thank her she was out the door. "Thank you!" I shout after her.
I really wasn't that hungry. I was nibbling on a waffle when Bass comes in.
"Well don't you look beautiful," he greets.
I stare at him, because I know he's joking. I'm a mess. My hair is all over the place and I was still in my pajamas.
He sits next to me, grabbing a piece of bacon he takes a bite.
"You eat now?" I ask.
"No, just trying to see if it tastes how I remember. That tastes horrible."
He chews it for a bit before he dumps the uneaten part on my plate as he grabs a napkin to spit out the piece he was chewing onto it.
"That's gross, Bass."
"That's what I said. I don't remember it tasting like that."
He hands me his spit out food and I place it on the serving tray as I put my waffle down. My appetite was now completely gone.
"What are you up to, sunshine?" He asks me with a knowing smile.
I squint my eyes at him. "What is it? Spit it out."
"Already did," he laughs. I roll my eyes. "I can smell that wolf of yours."
I can feel myself blush. He laughs as he kisses my head. "I'm just messing with you."
"Shut up," I tell him. I always use that as a defense but one day when I need them to truly shut up I feel that phrase will be meaningless.
Not that I have been saying it with meaning, it's always playfully. I really needed a new comeback.
My leg was twitching because of the itch but it slowly began to burn. A surge of pain came making a pained sound to resonate.
"Are you okay?" Bass asks concerned.
Another jolt comes as I whimper from the intensity.
"My leg is hurting," I strain out.
"Maybe you should go to the doctor."
I shake my head. I did not want to go back there but another sharp pain comes. I try not to cry in pain as another comes. I had tears on my eyes. Bass looked worried.
Grabbing my face he gently makes me look at him. "I'm going to go and I'm going to need you to tell the Burke's to take you to the hospital, okay?" He gently tells me. But I was shaking my head.
"Vee, don't make me barge downstairs and drag you myself. Please, listen to me. You have to do it. For me, can you do that?"
I hated when they did that. I really did not want to go back there but the look on his face had me nodding in agreement. I whimper as another surge comes. I hated this stupid cast.
Bass kisses me on the cheek before he dashes out. The cry of pains I was holding back come as an intense one makes me cry out loud. Angie comes rushing through the door.
"What's wrong?" She looked so worried.
"My leg is hurting me," I manage to say.
She calls for John as he carries me down the stairs to his truck. I had my mouth shut tightly as more sharp pains came. I was trying to seem okay but they were really intense. I was going to kill Otto for this.
I was alone in the room as the doctor walked in.
He gives me a sheepish smile. "I would say it's good to see you again but in different circumstances."
"Same, Doc. Same."
"I'll have to take the cast off," he informs me. Which I relish on that because screw this cast.
When he was done taking it off I sighed in relief. The pain was subsiding. It was if the cast itself was making those sharp painful surges to happen.
"Wow, you've healed faster than I anticipated. The cast was preventing you from fully healing. You'll need to keep it elevated at an angle to finish the healing process. That's where this comes in handy," he says showing me a boot.
"It'll help your foot be at an angle to help your ankle heal properly."
I nod. Anything at this point was better than that cast. I was now able to scratch that itch. It was heavenly.
He laughs when I sigh in relief. He really looked even more tired than before.
"Can you tell me what's going on with Ander? I can see he's just as tired as you."
Dr. Colbert sighed. "The council has prohibited me from seeing you."
"Then why are you here? Send another doctor."
He shakes his head. "You're Ander's mate, I'll take care of you as long as you'd need me to."
"I don't want you to do something that will cause you harm or trouble."
His smile grows. "I can see why he likes you, you're just like him."
I was taken back by that. Did not expect this visit to turn out like this.
"Please don't insult him."
We laugh. "Everything he does is because he believes it's worth it. When he pleaded for me to help you I couldn't refuse. I gave him my word that I'll look after you and I intend to keep it."
"You must really care about him."
"You have no idea. He's worth more than he gives himself credit for. If you don't mind me saying, if you do give him a chance be patient. He's been through a lot."
I don't say anything. I look at him as I try to smile. I knew a portion of what he went through and that alone hit me deeper than I'd ever admit to. It was now engraved in me like I'm sure mine is in his. I give him a stern nod which makes him smile more.
He walks out to talk to Angie and John.