I woke up inside the closet again. I had a slight headache but nothing I couldn't handle. It was Monday and I needed to get ready for school. I know I had a whole plan of turning eighteen and graduating before leaving this place but I was having second thoughts.
Standing in the dark room I look around before stepping out. Mark was in my bed, he was reading Curious George. My steps falter at the realization.
"Why are you reading that?" I hesitantly ask.
Mark looks up, "I found it on the top shelf," he points to the now slightly less empty bookshelf.
"Hmm," I say. I go to take a shower.
"Are you really going to give your mate a chance?"
His question takes me by surprise. I was putting my beige jacket on.
"I-I...I don't know," I admit.
"What made you change your mind?" Mark asks now intrigued.
"Don't get me wrong I do want to get to know him. It's just if I tell him I want to give us a try and then try to join his pack, he'll think I'm using him," I say warily.
"You know he won't think that," Mark assures me.
"Maybe not him," I say thinking of Theo and the rest.
"Are you seriously now thinking about what others think?"
"No, yes...maybe?" I say unsure. I don't know if that's really what it is that stops me.
"Or is it that you're scared? You're scared that you might end up catching feelings," Mark teases.
I look at him as I let his words sink in. I roll my eyes before heading downstairs.
At breakfast Angie and John were now more relaxed. They hadn't brought up the necklace and I haven't asked them what else my parents had planned out for me. I wasn't ready. They were gushing over the fact that Maggie and Tristan had a beautiful home. They were telling us how Maggie gave them a tour. Mark almost choked at the thought of that. My guess was that his room was a mess again. I wanted to laugh but I kept my attention to Angie as she continued to tell her story.
Mark was driving me as I let my mind wander. I was going through many different interactions that I could have with Ander. All of them made me cringe.
'Hey Ander, wanna finish this mating thing or what?' Was the less awkward one, trust me, the rest were not pretty.
Mark was humming. He looked more cheerful which was refreshing.
Once he pulled over he got out to open my door. I stepped out just as he opens and shuts his mouth.
"What?"
"Just try not to be too hard on yourself or him," Mark says.
"Since when do you care about him?"
"Just be easy on him, please."
"Are you the one catching feelings, Mark?"
"Shut up," Mark laughs. "I'd date him if weren't for your bond thing."
I laugh. I laugh so much tears start to stream down my cheeks.
"It wasn't that funny," Mark says annoyed. If it weren't for the ghost of a smile on his face I would have thought he was annoyed.
"Thank you," I say kissing his cheek.
He manages to take some of my worries out which I don't doubt was his intention.
"Love you," Mark tells me.
"Love you, too." I blow him a kiss.
He catches the kiss, drops it on the ground, steps on it—twisting his shoe like if it were a used cigarette bud. I laugh, sticking my tongue out I get in and drive off.
When I arrive at the school I look for the group but they're nowhere to be seen. The Jeep is here but they're not. I went into the building as people stare at me. This time some look at me with what looked like pity. This was new...
I ignore everyone as I head into homeroom. That's when I spot Theo, he has his head down. He looks to be sleeping but I don't pay more attention to him as Mr. Shwerb speaks to me.
"Miss Rye, how are you doing? I heard you had a hard tumble." Mr. Shwerb says with fake sympathy. I look at him.
"Gravity, what can I say?" I joke.
Mr. Shwerb makes a sound but I don't pay further attention to him. I walk to my seat.
Ander isn't on the seat next to mine which dampers my mood all that more.
"Do you think Hailey pushed her," someone says behind me.
"Hailey?" Joseph asks confused.
"She did dump that milkshake on her when she was threatening her for coming onto you," the first voice says.
Joseph snorts. "Wouldn't put it pass Hailey."
It took me a minute to remember doing that to anyone. It was the blond girl that tried to get me to stop coming after her "man". I snort just thinking about it. The look on her face was priceless.
"Hey, new girl," Joseph calls to me.
I contemplate turning around but then I have no choice when he starts to throw balled up papers at me. I slowly turn to him and his friends.
"Yes?" I try to contain my annoyance.
"What exactly happened to you? I heard Hailey did it, some say that your guardians tried to get rid off you to keep your money."
I look at him in wonder. He really was out here surprising me in how much more stupider he can get. Who would even believe that?
"It was my ex, he pushed me off a cliff. He's still angry I ran away from him. It's hard to be with someone that is part of a big mafia family. He would always come with blood in his clothes, it was unflattering." I tell them.
The look on their faces was just as priceless as the girl with the milk. I try to keep a straight face as they look to see if I'm lying. Which I was but hopefully that story would make them stay away.
"He saw me hug someone and just lost it. I haven't seen the guy that hugged me. I wonder if he's okay," I feign concern.
"You're lying," Joseph sneers.
"What?" I say in shock. How dare he not believe me?
"You're fucking lying," he glares at me.
"Take it as you will. You asked and I answered." I shrug ready to turn around. Joseph catches my arm, he grips it hard, I look at his hand and then at him.
"We're not done here," he tells me tightening his grip. I try to pull away but he only digs his nails more deep. Even with my jacket I can feel the force of his nails. He really needed to trim them down.
"Let. Me. Go." I emphasize each word.
"You think you can just lie and not face consequences?" he glares at me.
I laugh, "are you now the lying police? Are you responsible for making sure people tell the truth?"
When he puts more force on his grip I forcefully yank my arm away. I stand so that we are now eye to eye. "You ever touch me again, I'll rip your limbs off, got it?"
"I'm not scared of you," he smiles.
I pull my sleeve up to reveal a red mark. I look at him. "To remind you to stay on your lane." He spat.
I smile back at him which makes him falter.
Reaching for his arm, the one he stretched out to grab me. I pull him as I flip him, twisting his arm behind his back as he lays on the floor screaming in pain. I put more pressure by digging my knee on his back, even though my ankle was a little sore the small pain I felt was worth hearing his cries for mercy. I put more pressure as I lean closer to him, "if you ever come near me I will do more than twist your arm. I will break it. If you ever talk to me again, much less look at me, I will hurt you more than you can ever imagine. This will be the last you speak of me, got it?"
He nods vigorously as he promises to not bother me again. I let him go as Mr. Shwerb is yelling at me at the top of his lungs.
"We were just talking," I tell him innocently.
He glares at me calling me names as he sends me to the office. I grab my things and head out.
I make to the office to find the same lady typing away at her computer. She looks tired. She catches me staring. "Why are you here?"
"Mr. Shwerb thought I would get manners in here," I tell her.
"What did you do?" She asks me accusingly.
"I told a guy to never touch me," I shrug taking a seat.
"Is that all you did?" She squints her eyes.
"Might have shown him what could happen if he ever tries it again," I give her a sweet smile.
She snorts but doesn't say anything else. She goes back to her computer forgetting I was even there. Now that I was in the small office I think about how I've never spoken to the principal. Was there a principal?
Once lunch reaches I feel less irritable. I head outside as the fresh air helps me breathe more clearly. I put on Ander's shades as I slowly make my way towards their table. They were all there which came to a great relief to me.
"It's happening whether you like it or not, Ander." Andrea says sternly. I was barely approaching them when I hear her voice.
"I'm not going to argue with you, Andrea. Do as you please but I'm not going."
Ander and Andrea are in an intense conversation while the rest of the group looks to be fighting to stay awake. I hesitantly sit next to Ander as he continues his conversation with Andrea.
I look around to see Robb clutching his head as if he's trying to ward off a headache. Theo was sleeping, he had his head on top of his arms. His hoodie covered his face. Jay was nodding off, what was surprising was the fact that he wasn't eating. Diana was yawning behind her hand. She looked as if she was trying to keep up with the conversation but was having trouble. She kept blinking her eyes.
"Yes. You. Are." Andrea grits out. She was really pushing for whatever they were talking about. It was making it awkward.
"You don't need me there to have a great time," Ander defends. He looks just as tired as the rest. The only one up and alert seemed to be Andrea, and well me.
"It's your birthday party, how could you not be there?" She asks.
I tense at that. Was it his birthday? I mean I wouldn't know as I never even told him about mine.
"My birthday passed a while ago."
"Yeah, and you were busy with something," Andrea says bitterly as she looks at me.
"Stop it, Andrea." Ander warns.
"What do you mean by that?" I ask her.
She looks at me, "he was busy saving you that he didn't get to celebrate his birthday."
Ander clenches his jaw as he glares at Andrea. She just shrugs.
"Is that true?" I ask Ander. He avoids looking at me.
"I have to go," he says. Getting up he starts to walk away. I go after him.
"Wait," I manage to grab his arm.
He turns to me but looks at the ground.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Doesn't really matter," he tells me. He finally looks at me. I reach to caress his cheek. He closes his eyes as he leans to my touch, he sighs.
"You have to celebrate it," I whisper.
"Only if you come," he smiles. If he thinks I would say no just so he can get away without going, he was wrong. I endured mine, he'll have to endure his.
"Okay."
He looked surprised but soon smiles brightly.
"Go sit, I'll be right back."
I head back to find everyone now staring at me. Andrea looked slightly annoyed, Robb looked slightly sad, which made me feel bad. I don't know why but I felt it's my fault. Theo was still asleep as Jay and Diana smiled at me.
"Why are you all so tired?" I ask.
Robb groans, "we had to patrol all night."
"It's wasn't so bad," Andrea shrugs.
Jay glares at her which cause her to look away. "Not so bad? I had to do twice the work. I did your shift as you slept like a baby."
"Oh don't be like that Jay. You're always so eager to help," she nonchalantly says. Jay glares more profoundly at her.
I feel Ander behind me as he leans close to my ear. "Happy belated birthday!"
He gives me a huge bag of sour patch kids. Those five pound bags. I squeal as I hug it towards me.
He sits sideways on the bench, to face me. I look up at him with a huge smile, "thank you."
I guess Mark isn't the only one that cares about food. I would have rejected anything else but this, I can live with this.
Everyone looks at my candy with hunger. Which only makes me clutch it tighter. Putting it between me and Ander I slide closer to him to protect it. He laughs as I pull on his jacket to cover it from prying eyes. It doesn't work.
"I'm so hungry," Jay whines.
I pull out my container. I had hoagies. I made a lot of them to share, which now that I think about it—it was a brilliant idea. When Angie saw how much I made she looked worried. I told her it was for people I met at school she beamed and helped me make even more. My bag looked like it could burst.
"It's your lucky day," I say. I open the containers. I even had a small one with cake in it. I save that for Ander.
"If you weren't someone's mate I'd kiss you," Jay says. He digs in but then stops.
I laugh but then I see the look on his face.
"It was my birthday yesterday. Since you clearly didn't get me anything the least you can do is eat with me."
We all look at Jay, he smiles as he goes in for more. I sigh as he eats without reserve.
Ander is eating some of the cake but soon finds it being snatched away. Robb smiled as he ate it.
I laugh as Ander glares at him but let's him have it.
I rest my head on his shoulder as he puts his arm around me. I grab the candy and hug it towards me.
I look up at him as everyone eats, even Theo couldn't resist.
"Can we have our talk today after school?" I quietly ask Ander.
He tenses but looks down at me nodding in agreement. He looks away in thought.
I tug at his sweater as he looks back at me, he manages a small smile. I grab the top of his sweater in a tight hold, pulling it down towards me. Ander slowly leans with the pull once he's close I kiss him. He stiffens but soon returns the kiss. Deepening it. I pull back and smile at him. He rests his forehead on mine as we stay close together until the bell rings.
I look back to see everyone trying to divert their eyes as they continue to eat.
Theo looks at me suspiciously but then turns away. I was blushing that much I know. I don't know why I did that but I don't regret it.
Ander kisses my cheek as he stands. I take his extend hand as we interlock our hands. I'm still clutching the candy, I hand it over to Ander for safe keeping as I gather the empty containers.
"I should put them in the car. Don't want to carry them around."
Ander walks me as he helps me carry some and the candy. I contemplate leaving the candy as well but I feel like they might get stolen. Which is dumb of me but that's how I felt. I end up stuffing them in my bag. Ander walks me to my class.
"Wait for me outside, okay?" I tell him.
"I'll be there, now go inside before you're late." He gently pushes me in which makes me laugh. I turn to kiss his cheek as I walk in.
The whole day goes by fast as I'm stuck in my blissful memory of our kiss. Once the day was over I made straight line to the parking lot. Ander was waiting for me by his Jeep.
He sees me as I make my way towards him. He has shades on so I don't bother digging mine out.
I hug him as we relish in each other's embrace. We stay like that until someone clears their throat.
I pull away to see Robb looking at us.
"I kind of want to go home...today," he teases.
I blush. I step away from Ander as the rest of the group comes outside.
"Is she coming to the pack house?" Diana asks.
"I don't think she's ready for all of that." Ander says. "I'll head out with her so take the Jeep."
He hands Robb the keys as he grabs my hand. I wave them goodbye as Ander walks me to Mark's car. Mark had swapped the challenger for the mustang again, since it was now cleaned. They did a very thorough job, no blood insight.
Ander opens the passenger side for me as I step in. I was grateful to not drive. It was difficult with the boot. When I left Mark I ended up driving slow. I never really realized how much I used my right foot while driving.
"Where are we going?" I ask him. He settles on the driver's side before pulling away.
"You'll see."
We drive for a few minutes before he pulls to the side of a road. I look at him in confusion. There was nothing but trees around. A wooded area.
He comes to open my door. Helping me out he offers to carry me.
"Carry me? For what?"
"It's a bit of a walk from here," he sheepishly says.
I twirl my finger signaling for him to turn around. I jump on his back which he grunts at the force of my weight. I laugh but he really had me thinking I was too heavy.
"I'm just kidding," he says as if sensing my thoughts.
"Jerk."
We laugh as he walks us towards the place he wanted to show me.
He walks for a few minutes before we come to a place where the trees bend into each other causing the effect of an arch. The beauty of it is that it wasn't just a few trees but a whole row. Like a long isle. He walks us under the pathway.
"Whoa, that's so cool. I love it," I tell him.
"Wait until you see where it leads," he says.
When we get to the end there's a creek. The water was so clear that you can see the bottom. The sound of water rushing by ties it beautifully. There was a fallen tree that fell at an angle causing it to become a bench. It was beautiful. There was wildflowers everywhere. The seeds of the dandelions floated about making it look that more mystical.
Ander sets me down on the fallen tree bench.
"Don't tell me this is your thinking place," I say.
"Not mine, I do come here to escape and think, but the pack has found it well before me. They let me use it by myself from time to time."
"It's beautiful, I can see people getting married here."
"They have, very special place."
I nod. I wouldn't blame them for wanting to marry here. It was gorgeous.
"So, what did you want to talk about?"
I smile as I can see him getting nervous.
"Us," I say. He nods. "I wanted to get to know you better. I have questions."
He laughs. "Ask away."
"So if you're not the Alpha who is? What exactly do you need to do to be Alpha? Does this mate thing make you fall in love blindly?"
"Wow, those are questions," he jokes.
"I have more."
He laughs this time for real. He comes to sit by me.
"As for me and the whole Alpha thing, I'm in trial basis. I was supposed to have gotten the title on my eighteenth birthday but I messed that up. I defied them and now they have my leadership in question. I just have to pay my dues and I should be Alpha soon, don't worry about that. As for the mate thing, that's complicated."
"It can go either way. There's some that never find them and they die without having ever found them. Then there's those that look for them but come to think they'll never find them which causes them to become bitter. Once that bitterness and resentment they have for not finding their mate taints them. It taints them enough that when they do find their mate they're hateful towards them. Which causes a drift. So no it doesn't make you fall blindly in love, it just gives you the opportunity to. It shows you who is meant for you, whether you decide to love them is up to you. There have been cases were they resent each other and go on about life like nothing until the pull gets to them. They tend to live miserable lives."
I stare at him in disbelief. There was a possibility that I could come to hate him. That I feel resentment towards him or him towards me. That was more scary than thinking you'll never find your other half.
"So they can come to hate each other?"
Ander nods. "If one is bitter and full of hate then yes. They could make it hard to bond with. Which would cause their mate to be hurt as well. It's a slippery slope that can go either way."
"But I thought once you found your mate everything would be all right. That you'll just connect."
"Finding your mate doesn't necessarily mean you'll fall head over heels for them. It's just more like a nudge towards the person that is compatible with you. To the one that is right for you."
"Who's your Alpha?" I ask. I rather not think about all the bad that can happen.
"Tom, he was the last Alpha's beta. He's acting Alpha until I'm in charge."
"How many are in your pack?"
"Twenty five. They're mostly older. Diana, Jay, Robb, Theo, and Andrea are the next in line to take over. The rest will either retire or stay and follow me. Tom has been wanting to retire to move with his mate to the Bahamas. He's only in charge because I wasn't ready."
"You change leadership a lot?"
"Not really. It's only crucial now because the last Alpha abandoned the pack. So they're looking for the next to take over. Which was me. I have to earn that spot but so far I keep messing things up."
"Because of me," I say.
He comes closer. Caressing my cheek he leans in. "No, because I let my emotions get in the way."
I lean closer enjoying the connection we have.
"What do they want from you? I heard you talking to Mark. You said you had to agree to something you've been denying them, what is it?"
He pulls away. I close my eyes as I feel the emptiness between us.
"You were listing to our private conversation?"
I shrug. "It was hard not to when you were screaming," I try to defend.
He chuckles. "They wanted me to talk to Otto. They wanted me to tell him the next time he crosses over to our land will be his last."
At Otto's name I stiffen. I too had beef with Otto.
"What's with him?"
"Nothing, there's nothing to worry about. I have him handled."
He did not have him handled. Makes me wonder what's really going on between them.
"Anything else you'd like to know?"
"What's your favorite color?"
He laughs. "Red, yours?"
"Yellow. Favorite food?"
"Burgers."
"Mine is tuna sandwich. Favorite movie?"
Ander makes a face but laughs when I get offended.
"My Neighbor Totoro, don't ask."
I laugh. "Tell me!" I plead.
"Tell me yours first."
"Lilo and Stitch," I confess.
"I used to watch it all the time growing up. It's a classic." Ander shrugs. It was adorable.
"Favorite snack?"
"Milky Way."
I looked at him. He had always given me his only Milky Way. It made me think of when Mark gave me his last cookie. It made my small heart swell.
"Sour patch kids, but you knew that."
He nods. "Mark can be useful sometimes." He admits. I laugh because I should have known.
"What else has he told you about me?"
"Nothing, he said you'd kill him if he helped me out. He just let me know it was your birthday and that you loved candy. I just guessed which kind."
"You didn't guess. Did you?"
He shakes his head. He probably noticed me eating them or something.
"What else is there to know?"
"I have no clue." Ander says. It was as if we were both new at this dating thing.
"Want to go for a swim?" He offers.
I look at the water it looked amazing but I decline. "Not with this," I say pointing at my boot.
He nods. "So this party of yours, want to be my date?" I ask him.
He chuckles. "I think I'm the one supposed to ask that."
"No, I can do it as well. So, what do you say?"
"I'd love to."
I smile as he leans in. Kissing me on my nose he pulls away.
"Let's get you home. You need to rest."
"You're one to talk."
He carries me all the way back to the car. Inside I ponder whether or not to ask him to join me again. Was it going too fast?
I did sleep well when he was around. Now that I had spent time with him I felt like I needed him around. It was overwhelming.
I decide not to overstep things. I let him drive me all the way to the Burke's. All the way home.