"Here, have this quickly," I said drawing the armoire doors open and setting the white paper bag in front of him. It was already risky, taking two trips down to the community square and people might start to get suspicious since I wasn't a regular in town.
I caught him playing with a teddy, putting it behind him in an attempt to conceal it. It was too late.
"That was...so un-carter?" I grinned.
He scowled at me. "Oh shut up. What are you doing here anyway, I thought you were having dinner with your father?"
I pulled the window blinds down before plopping on the bed. "Father couldn't make it today."
"Now that's saying something," his gaze dropped to the sandwich. "You got me grilled tomato cheese this time? That's so sweet."
Cheeky.
"I wanted you to eat it warm," I said truthfully, recalling the struggle I took going downtown at this ungodly time of the night. Well, not ungodly. It was still six-thirty, the festival party was scheduled for eight. "So I had to lie to Dorian about getting the groceries. I think she kinda smelled the sandwich on me so she's now suspicious. We'll have to be extremely careful from now on."
"Well you're in your own house,"
"Carter, not now please" I whined, flipping on my side to face him.
"What? I honestly see no reason why you should be accountable to your maid. It doesn't make sense, I mean what's the best she could do?"
I tapped my chin thoughtfully. "She could tell my father I'm up to something, then come up with some scary story to back it up. You've already seen how she is."
He snorted. "Yeah, she's crazy if you ask me. I still don't get it at all, if you had this much freedom then why are you sad? When did you choose to give up happiness for those you care about?"
I narrowed my eyes at him. "Now I'm beginning to get convinced that you've finally lost it."
"You can't be sure though. I'd say you take a step forward."
"And what's that saying?"
"Take a dare, delve into the world. Explore the possibilities and go for who you want,"
I sighed. "You just don't get it don't you?" I rested my chin on my left palm. "Come on Carter, take a look at me, I'm already worse than I am. I thought coming out of the closet would have been beneficial to some extent but living in a town where such things don't sit well with the people around.. you've got to admit at some point that it's hard."
He paused. "Did I ever tell you that one of the greatest mistakes I made was letting what people said get to me?"
I scoffed, then eyed him up and down. "Look, I know you've been through a lot but I don't really see how this applies to you,"
"Of course it does. I was too naive to let what people thought about being gay get to me. Even my parents too hammered on it while I was younger. They made me think it was bad, that it felt wrong," he laughed a little. "Well fuck them now, I didn't go that far. I became a train stuck in the middle of a rail up a deadly cliff. It was only after they kicked me out that my existence began coming altogether. I discovered that I was more of a human than each of them were." he nodded somewhat dismissively as though sure his sermon had gotten to me - Well it had, I felt a strange kind of zeal possess me.
I fix him a stare. "You've infected me, haven't you? Now I feel insane."
He smiled. "Oh you'll get used to it," then he pushed the paper bag away. "I ate some cookies again. Thanks but I don't feel hungry. You should have it. Take it as a reward for being such a good student."
"Well I never did choose a cheesy tutor," I retort, my eyes settling on the bag. Clutching my growling stomach, I drew it closer then gently unwrapped it. "I talked with Freddie again and he was wondering if I'd like to come to the festival party tonight."
"Now that's a good start," he pursed his lips. "I really think you should go, I mean you want this right?"
I blushed slightly, feeling like a prima donna. "I don't know, it feels kinda hasty, doesn't it? All these feelings and dates... I never imagined my life could be so worth looking forward to. I'm guessing I should say thank you for your advice."
He grins then raised his chin defiantly. "Well I won't just accept a thank you, there's gonna be more than that."
My brows drew together instantly. "And which is? What's it that you really want?"
He looked devious. "How about a makeover? Stuffed doll."
A gasp escaped my lips. "Carter, I can't-"
"Shh," he pressed a finger across his lips, silencing me. "There, there. Feel better?"