"When you love someone and someone doesn't love you back, how do you feel"- anonymous.
Megan gasped for breath as she left the bathroom , the pain she felt knowing that JT has been or is with other women was always overwhelming and something she found out she can never get use to it nomatter the number of times she encounter it.
Even seeing it on social media as hearsay hurts her so bad not to talk of witnessing it herself.
She closed her eyes as she lean on the wall of a close place as she breath in and out counting numbers in her mind as a form of distraction.
Seeing that it She had spent too much time there, she quickly left as She continually tries to put herself together as she headed back to the party.
She has experienced this countless times since her marriage but everytime it happens the pain she felt are always like the first time.
"Hey !hey!", Yelled Stacey the bimbo who she had just had an altercation with as she ran to meet up with her.
This made her slow down as where she was presently was not crowded and she wouldn't want her to create a scene as she had learned early in life that whosever that doesn't have anything to lose can afford to be shameless.
Stacey clearly fit the profile of a shameless person cos if she wasn't , she won't be throwing the affair she had with her husband on her( the wife) face.
Forcefully implanting her self in front of her Stacey said " maybe he dump me, at least there was a time I had him and I am not a gold digger, the lady who choose to remain with him just to have an easy life"
Megan felt shocked as she watched her sneered the words before walking away.
She looked around slowly to check if someone has witnessed what happened and sighed in relief when she noticed that none did .
She wondered where she had really erred to be getting all this kind of humiliation.
If getting married to Jared was something she should have done or she should have just think of an alternative then.
Just that her marriage to him had at least make her parents talk to her which had came as a surprise to her.
The same family who refused to talk to her ever since the incident with him years ago....
The same family who took his sides on everything. To her parents, Jared was perfect and too good for the likes of her.
She knew the way people viewed her and she no longer cared about them or what they think. She is only concerned with the thought of Jared and how she could get back with him like they were in the past before the whole incident.
She thought they could take things slowly but she has not been able to get through to him and it seems that everything so far as not worked.
It was too late she knew in her heart but she still want to try and now the word "Gold digger" again and again.
She tried to shrug it off and walk away slowly to the garden so she could get fresh air.
She felt relief immediately she got there and decided she would stay there until Jared is ready to leave at least it would spare her from those trashy stuff and suffocating eyes watching her inside.
As she sat down on a bench outside what she saw .....
She say JT with a lady holding hands and their eyes met .
She noticed he wasn't shocked or surprise at seeing her instead he pulled the lady close to himself and was whispering to her while the lady giggled.
She imagine the sweet nothings he was probably telling the lady cos she had once being in her shoes.
If anyone asked her who the perfect man was she had said JT anytime any day ...
He had loved her and she had picture them being together forever .
She had picture being MRs Macallam, having his kids and being the only woman in his life till death do them apart.
She never bargained that it will ever change.
Even when he came to marry her with the conditions and all, she still hope within her....
that maybe his marrying her is because he can't do without her....
that they could slowly work things out.
Even with the news circulating in the media she still kept on with her hope saying inwardly that it is mostly just news that all that matters is what and how JT feels .
Even when his ex girlfriends throw their relationship to her face she took it all but now seeing it she knew she had being too naive thinking she could have her Man back.
She didn't need a soothsayer to know that she was fighting an already lost battle, one she lost years ago without the chance to defend herself.
The wetness she felt on her cheeks brought her back to the present and she wipe her eyes as she don't want any camera to capture her like this to avoid the talks.
She decided to head back inside at least it was better than her seeing him with someone else.
She saw him entered few minutes later and he moved close to her.
She didn't say any word to him but her eyes on him spoke of the hurt he did to her.
"Megan let's leave", he said to her as he held her hands pulling her close to him.
"Don't create a scene", he told her quietly as he held her hands closer to his tightly as she tries to extract her hands from him because the thought of what he had been doing earlier on disgust her.
They both walk outside, the valet opened the door and they separated immediately they got in.
"JT I know you hate me but you should be mindful of the press", she said to him quietly as she sat down her right leg crossed over the left one .
" What happened inside there could have been captured", she continued .
"When you saw us there...did you wish you were the one in my hands?", he asked her instead taking out his iPad and tapping on it.
As shocked as she was by his question she didn't reply him only pretend she was concentrating on her phone but the trembling of her hands betrayed the calmness she tried to potray.
This has been his spite everytime they go out together, doing things that he knows would hurt her and it got to her every time.