Last night's dinner, made me realize to never ever tell my parents about my condition to at least spare them from the pain. For now, I should just keep this to myself.
I woke up very early than my usual time. I realized that I was curled up on my floor when I woke up a while ago. I was a mess when I looked at myself in the mirror. Bloodshot, puffy eyes. My hair was tangled in each strand. My clothes from last night were crumpled.
I sighed one last time in front of the mirror before I went inside my bathroom to freshen up. I removed my clothes one by one. I stretched up a bit before I slide the glass going to my shower. All the while in the shower all I can think was how I let myself give in last night. For the very first time, I let myself mourn for what has yet to come in my life. Is that even possible?
After I showered, I went next to my walk in closet. I did not have the energy to dress up today. So, I picked what I saw first. Did not mind if it looks good together or not. I blow dried my hair. Put some light make up on my face.
When I was done, I look at my reflection once again. It is as if there was no remnants of what happened last night. I hid all the evidence that can be seen in my face. That's the good thing about make up. It can conceal what is underneath you.
Satisfied with how I look for today, I went downstairs. I turned right. I reached the last step on the stairs. My breakfast will be served near the pool area. It's where I usually eat. Let's just say that I like to start my day with the sight of some nature. Because I know the whole day, I will be staying inside my office.
It is still six forty-five in the morning when I started eating my breakfast. I was told that my parents are still sleeping and I decided not to wake them and wait for them because I still have lots of load of work waiting for me in the office.
It finally dawned on me that this is my reality. The truth finally sinked in to me.
So, I wrote all the things I wanted so bad to do these past few years in my notebook. Like maybe I should try going to the clubs and meet with some of my friends. Or maybe going to the mall and shop the whole day. Or even go somewhere to relax and just feel free.
I scribbled all of it and saw that I have a lot of things that I missed out doing. Seeing the things I haven't done made me regret a little bit. It is sad to see that ever since then I was given responsibilities, I haven't enjoyed my teenage life.
It was probably my younger self thinking I still have the lifetime to do all those things I so want to do. But now that I know how little time I have left, I just wish I did some of these before.
I was consumed with work at such a young age. I put pressure to myself to do better that at the process I forgot to enjoy every second of it.
Sipping my favorite brewed black coffee, I ate my breakfast in a peaceful state. It was disturbed when I heard a ping on my phone. I looked at it and saw that I get an email. I put down my knife and fork. I grabbed my phone, clicked it open and read.
Batch 2014
You are all highly encouraged to attend our reunion this coming September 27, 2019. Failure to do so may result to a painful punishment. Enjoy your week!
I roll my eyes as I read the message. It's obvious that ladies and gentlemen my best friend Agnese, sent this.Going to that reunion may not sound bad at all. After all I've decided to try and explore new things. This one was one of the to-do list I wrote on my notebook.
I clicked the going button and closed my email.
I sipped one last time on my coffee before I stood up. I was about to grab my keys and go when I received a call from Agnese. I rolled my eyes at the sight of her name.
"Yes?"
"Hello and good morning to you too Lia." she said sarcastically...
"What do you want?" I asked, ignoring her statement. I reached for my keys and went to my car.
"Still the ever hot headed friend you are Lia...." she laughed on the other side. It is still early but her energy is already on its peak.
"....."
"Well anyway, is it true that you're going to join our reunion? Are you okay? This is a big miracle you know Lia!! It's been years since the last time you joined us!!"
Really?...she just called me to talk about this?
"Yeah. Gotta go now. Bye."
Before she can say something more I turned off the call .
"Wai---"
I start the engine and I'm off to work.
I understand her reaction, her being shock at me for joining the reunion. I had been avoiding it over the past years.
Wow! How time flies so fast. I can't believe it that it had been three years since that day.
I can't helped but sigh. It had been three years since we broke up. Three years since I've found out all about the lies....the secrets...Three years that I've found out that I had been a fool for believing in every promises he made.
But years has passed and I already let myself forgive him even if he hasn't asked for forgiveness yet. I also forgave myself. It was for my sanity and peace of mind.
I heard he's happy now and probably with someone new. I'm happy he's happy. No more bitterness within my bones. I'm definitely okay with it.
After we broke up, I focused myself on to my work. And uh-- I may have wrote a book hmmm...about it. I cried every time I wrote something during those times. It was difficult. Writing and making it a book was my escape.
I also did try drinking alcoholic drinks because I had heard that it'll help you feel no pain...Yeah well it did eventually. But only for a short period of time when my whole body is messed up with all the drinks I drunk that night.
I wasn't ignorant when it comes to it. I drink all the liquors like I was an addict. It will never a lie when they said that when you feel too much emotion in your heart and you can't handle it...it will push you to do unimaginable things. That'll leave you question yourself the next day.
Unlike other people who go to bars and clubs to drink...I stayed inside our mansion and drink it all up by myself.
I remembered the unimaginable things I did during that night. Imagine, the securities have to drag me back inside our mansion. The maids were busy taking care of me. I was crying and singing and I was a total mess that night.
I was thankful that my parents weren't there to witness everything. Me crying outside our gates...or saw me wearing neon green legging pants and neon pink sports bra..getting ready to jog in the middle of the night. I was that crazy!
That very next day...I woke up and found myself running going to the bathroom and puke all my guts out. I regretted it. It was a bad idea to drink. It was a mistake that I'll never do again. Ever!
And I swore to myself that I will never drink that much alcohol anymore!
I shook my head as I remembered that embarrassing moment I had. All the securities and staffs inside our mansion saw it but none of them had the guts to tell my parents about it. And I'm thankful for that or else my mama or papa will ground me for life.
And they will also asked me what the hell happened to me? I don't want to imagine if they knew about it.
I was so lost in my thought when I heard a knock on my door.
"Come in."
Claire, my secretary slowly went inside my office. She was holding her tablet. Scrolling through it, she looked up at me and said.
"Miss, I just want to inform you that you don't have any schedules for today."
"Okay, Thanks for today Claire."
I'm done with my meetings for this whole week. I stretched a bit and rested my back to my swivel chair. Finally! I can stop thinking about work for a little while.
This week had been all about meetings...meeting deadlines...talking with new possible clients and of course going to my studio and starting my book. I am happy that I have this idea for my next book but ... I'm still having a hard time putting it into words.
This had been my routine ever since then. But tonight, this will change for sure. Because tonight I'm going to party!
It's Friday night and I promised my classmates to be there tonight. I already received a text from Agnese reminding me about later a while ago.
I read her text saying, "Lia! Don't forget about our reunion later. I'll send you the details now..okay?"
I'm wearing a black Prada cocktail dress not too conservative and not too revealing. I partnered it with a black stiletto from Chanel. Put some make up suitable for tonight and curled the tips of my hair to look it like cute little waves...and now I'm ready to go. With last glance at the mirror, I smiled, feeling satisfied with my finish look for tonight.
I went down and saw that my parents are drinking their tea in front of our pool. I went towards them.
"Mama, Papa, I'll go now." I said.
Ever heard of a 23 year old asking for permission to their parents? Well here I am! I still exist!
I kissed their cheeks and was about to turn around and go when my mama reminded me again.
"Lia...please take care of yourself. Don't drink too much alcohol or worse don't talk with strangers."
See...she still the ever protective mama ever! Perks of being the only child ha?!..
"Really now mom?"
My papa just laughed at me. Teasing me. But quickly stops when my mama looked at him with her stern look. She then looked at me, waiting to answer her. I sighed and just said.
"Okay Mama."
I checked myself through my mirror for the last time before entering the club. A fancy club where only the prominent members here in the country are allowed to enter..which by the way owned by one of my classmates ...Patrick or John. I forgot.
I got out of my car.
I received a lot of texts from Agnese. Which I of course ignored it.
The club is unusually quiet tonight unlike its usual nights. Maybe it was reserved for us to use for the night.
Greeted by bouncers and escorted by a waiter...finally I'm going to our table.
Many of my classmates before have already arrived. I quickly noticed Agnese in the crowd as she sashayed her way towards me.
Engulf with her tight hug. She seems so excited for tonight.
"I thought you'll never come Lia. But here you are in front of me. Let's go everyone is waiting for you." she said in her loud voice.
With the loud beat and sound of the music..I was surrounded with familiar faces. Everyone said their greetings and then back to what they were doing.
"I thought you'll chicken out tonight Lia. Remember your ex...he's here."
She watched me closely as she says those things. But I didn't give her the satisfaction of any reaction within my face. She waited but at the end she gave up.
I just ignored her and just follow her. So he's here hmm...didn't know about that. But who cares. I'm here to de-stress and enjoy myself.
She brought me to a table were our closest friends were seated. The girls were waving at me. But when I looked at the right side of our table, there I saw him...after three years...Astevan Bastien Ciervo...who is staring at me with his dark and cold eyes.
"What's his problem?" I thought to myself.