Chereads / An Idiot Gets Trucked And Reincarnates / Chapter 3 - Foolish Boy Attempts To Assassinate A Guy

Chapter 3 - Foolish Boy Attempts To Assassinate A Guy

I woke the fuck up and kick-flipped out of bed, then woke T-bro up, I asked, "where the fucks the next motherfucker at bro?" T-bro responded, "I think he's over at like, the fucked-ass-hellzone district cross town bro." I said thanks, grabbed T-bro as he ani-morphed into T-board and did a sick nasty grind on the bed side out the window, as we fell towards the imminent concrete I did a sick ass front-flip and landed safely, after which I found my bearings and did a narly kick-flip to accelerate to the hellzone, but T-board quickly told me to brake, so I stomped the fuck out of the ground to slow down.

We stopped right outside of a giant ass dome of radiating heat and rage, apparently James made a "dome-of-rage™" around his facility, which the books still in my GI tract told me made I-phones out of children's souls, which is fucked and evil as hell. I needed to get some sort of suits or some shit for me and T-board. After consulting my main man T-bro, I came to the motherfucking conclusion that I needed a cool ass suit made out of some motherfucking aero-gel laced carbon nano-fibers for maximum cool cyberpunk techno style.

After walking around aimlessly chatting with T-bro we came across a goonie hideout with a big ass neon sign that said, 'Carbon-Aero-Fiber production facility' which is really fucking long winded but whatever. We went into the lair only to be greeted by a giant room filled with gigantinormous machines pumping out shit-loads of slick black sheets with a nice blue sheen to them. I quickly took like, 20 of the sheets and stored them in my inter-dimensional-storage-rift before a ton of guards started rushing into the room. They were like, super fucking heavily armed and started shooting a barrage of bullets at me and T-bro, before a massive fucking guy walked into the room and was all like, "Bro those sheets are mine, what the fuck dude, come on." I took out my crossbow and started shooting the fuck out of the crowd, before a stray beam hit the big guy in the head, killing him. After the man died, the rest of the fuckers realized they weren't being paid anymore and left the facility, I took as many of the plates as I could before we left.

T-bro said that in the Fungus district there was a guy that could make us some cool heat/rage proof armor. So after a little bit of window shopping with my bro I did a kick flip to the Fungal district where we met with a guy called like, Dan Huberts William or something, he was like, "aight I can make the armor for you and the T-rex/Hover board for 5,000,000,000,000 dollars, I said fuck that and got out my crossbow, he quickly started making the fucking armor. After waiting for about 3 hours, the man gave us our sick ass armor and we were like, fucking ready to go kill the fuck out of James and his empire of children soul-stealing.

I did a kick-flip and didn't stop at the boundary of the sphere, we entered and kept towards the main facility, apparently when T-bro ate the pure energy guy, he gained the power to shoot literal laser beams from his gaping maw. He shifted back to T-rex form and started detonating entire factories deleting there very existence out of fucking space-time. After a while of running we made it to the facility T-bros beams of pure energy just bounced of the rage-infused walls, so T-bro ani-morphed back into a board and we entered the building, James had apparently been expecting us. As I made my way to his office a shitload of fuckers attempted to shoot me and shit, but the armor was to cool and simply deflected all the bullets, when we finally made it to the office only mildly battered and kind of tired, I opened the fucking door only to see James literally and metaphorically fucking fuming, he was motherfucking pissed. When he saw me enter through the door he let out a primal fucking roar and jumped at me.

Something I was not aware of about James was that he was a motherfucking silverback, I continued to have a fistfight with the beast and he was all like, "OOOOAH AH AOH AH AH OOOOOOOOH" So I reeled back in fear as I was fighting a fucking silverback, but then T-board said, "Bro, you've got this homedog, all you need to do is, like, motherfucking believe." And so with T-bros words of encouragement I did a 360-ollie-no-hands-deluxe-with-extra-onions on the motherfucker severing his nerves and ultimately killing the motherfucker, bringing his evil-ass empire of soul stealing to an end. Our next target was going to be a little more difficult though. His name was Hamman Jhonstons, he was the face of the meat industry and he was loved by shit-loads of people, but he hid dark secrets beneath his delicious fucking exterior.

Anyways, me and T-bro were tired as fuck so we stayed at another cheap ass hotel, said goodnight and remained oblivious to our obvious and well known bounties, like seriously what the fuck.