|Lyric's POV|
"Don't mind the mess. My gir—uh—roommate just moved out earlier today and I haven't had a chance to clean up." Amelia motions me into her apartment.
"It's not going to be a long term thing. It'll probably only be tonight. I'll go back tomorrow. I always do." I sigh as I set my things down on her counter and sit on the stool.
"Why would you go back? He's a bully." She falls down beside me and rests her head on the cold counter.
"He is, but I'm kind of used to it. It's just the way he was brought up. His dad does the same thing. Besides, he isn't wrong. I don't have anywhere else to go. My parents won't take me back if they know what I've been up to." I lower my gaze as I slip my pill bottle out of my purse. I set it in front of her, expecting some big reaction.
"I saw you picking them up at the club." She mumbles softly as she pushes them back toward me.
"Aren't you going to say it's bad for you? That it'll kill me? Everyone else does. Everyone except him. He just uses it as a threat." I glance around her apartment while she closes her eyes.
I spot an envelope on the counter a few inches away from us. The handwriting is scraggly, but it's clearly a girl's. Amelia. The strange girl beside me's name is written on the envelope. There's no address or anything, so it's got to be hand delivered or from her supposed roommate.
"We all have our problems. Mine is trusting to much. You're already better off than I am with the pills. At least they make you feel better." Amelia sits upright and gets to her feet.
"You'd think they would, but they really just numb the pain. They don't make it better. They take everything away completely." I reach over to grab the letter while her back is turned. I know I shouldn't, she's being such an amazing person, but I can't help it. I wanna know what it is and who it's from.
"I'm going to take a shower. You can watch tv or use my computer. I honestly don't care what you do." She groans as she slips around a corner for a moment. She comes back with an armful of clothes.
She hands me a pair of sweatpants and a baggy shirt before heading toward the only door besides the one to the hall. It closes behind her with a quiet thud. I set the clothes on the counter and take the opportunity to read the letter.
I carefully set it down and glance toward the bathroom. That poor thing. She's probably worse off than I am right now and here I am rummaging through her things. She'd said her roommate left, not that the one person she'd gave her life to left.
I carefully return the letter to its original state and glance around for a spot to change. There isn't much here, just a large open area. I can't hide behind a wall to change because there aren't any. I decide it doesn't matter. I strip down beside the couch and free myself from the prison I was forced into. I toss aside the clothes I wish I never let him buy and sit down on the couch.
I feel strange turning on her tv. I just sit there. I sit and listen to her quiet sobs. I listen to the falling of water just beyond the wall to my right. I've never wanted to hug someone as much as I do now. I want her hurt to stop. I want to be the only one hurting. I'm the only one who deserves it. I get to my feet and walk toward the kitchen.
I stare at my bottle of pills. They go down best with alcohol, but I don't have any and I'm definitely not drinking hers if she has any. She needs it more than I do. I take a handful of pills out of the bottle and close the lid. I look down at the white pills in my palm. I toss them in my mouth before turning toward the sink. I cup my hands and down some water to help swallow them.
A handful is nothing. It's a Wednesday night for me. Honestly, I'm shocked I haven't ended up in the hospital. I've overdosed a few times, but Ellis is always ready to get me out of it. He has his own collection of naloxone hidden with his stash of pills. He got mad at me one time. I overdosed and he had to use over half of his naloxone stash to get me out of it. I had hoped he'd run out before he could save me.
Amelia slips out of the bathroom silently. She doesn't even spare me a glance. Her long dark hair hangs down her back, soaking her shirt. I stand frozen in place. She looks sickly compared to earlier. She has more meat on her than I do, but right now, she looks like death.
I watch her crawl into her bed. Her back is turned toward me as her soft sobs continue. I know why she brought me here. She was hoping to forget about that girl. She was praying that I would help her forget. I think she knew it wouldn't happen though. I think she gave up wanting to make herself feel better when she saw how pitiful I looked frantically picking pills up off the ground.
I slowly make my way toward her. I sit down on the bed behind her. She glances over her shoulder at me, but doesn't say a word. I lay down and wrap my arm around her waist. I close my eyes and listen to the soft hum of the building. I may not be able to make her forget, but I can at least comfort her. I know how sometimes all someone wants is to be held. I know the feeling very well.
The numbness begins to take over my body. It's like a blanket of peace. It won't last very long, but it's worth it in the moment. My breathing slows drastically and I pull her closer. Her warmth make me feel less dead inside. She makes me feel almost human.