The next morning, I woke up late as it was Saturday and off from school, but I felt as fresh as the early morning. Of course, it's because of my realization. It's not at all like how those young heroes portrayed in those dreamy dance sequences. After brushing my teeth, I went down towards the kitchen area to get my juice and toast, but Mom and Badi Maas' conversation grabbed my attention.
"Jiji, Anu told me that why no guy is allowed to meet Swara. They have this belief that the first guy she meets after puberty will be her future husband," through my peripheral vision I kept an eye on them while I casually opened the fridge door and took the juice bottle out.
"Haan Sujata, I was also there so what?"
"What if we send Laksh secretly to meet Swara? Then Swara will marry Laksh and come to our house forever," I spit the juice and coughed hearing the absurd thought of my mother.
"Sanskar what happened?" Mom came towards me with a glass of water and I drank it to control my coughing also anger which is ticking like a bomb.
"Mom... Seriously, think twice before you speak. I will break Lucky's leg if he does something like that," I stopped blabbering when I realized what blunder I made and looked at the ladies looking at me with a 'SPIT IT OUT" expression etched on their faces.
"What you thought Sanskar? that we are blind people who don't know what is happening around us? We know from the time Swara entered our lives, you have a soft corner for her. We thought it as a childish thing, but yesterday I came to your room and I saw that you were missing. Then the balcony was open and I saw everything from there." Mom told folding her hand in a questioning manner.
"Mom, let me explain-"
"Explain what Sanskar? Today morning Anu was enquiring about this to Swara. Thank God, I asked Swara not to mention your name. You know about Anu and Vasu very well. Even though they are open-minded somewhere, they hold onto their culture and values close to them. If Anu knew about this, they will restrict Swara from entering our house. Already after this Swara's visit to our house will be less and now this,"
"Mom, I love Swara and I want to marry her." I could see that my crystal-clear statement made both of them tongue-tied. Mom came out of the shock first and raised her hand to slap me, but Badi Maa stopped her seeing me standing unflinching.
"Sujata, what are you doing?" Badi Maa dragged Mom away from me.
"You are asking me Jiji? What is wrong with him? What is your age Sanskar that you are talking about Love and Marriage? You are just 17, it's your age to study and concentrate on setting your career path, not to waste time on Love," Mom's word brought tears to my eyes and I looked away not wanting to show them.
"Sujata, he is still a kid and it's his age to feel all this, if you scold him like this, he may hide things from us. See, if he wants, he might have hidden the fact that he has feelings for Swara, but no right."
"But Jiji-"
"Let me handle this," Badi Maa came towards me and cupped my face wiping the tears away. I sniffed and hugged her, feeling pain in my heart. Slowly, she made me sit on the stool and sat opposite to me.
"Sanskar, now it's Swara age where she will experience things like you do. Let's say you and Swara get together; now you are in school, in a few months you will enter college, there you will meet a lot of people. I know you like Swara but who knows maybe you might meet a more beautiful and intelligent girl than Swara, then what will you tell Swara? Will you break her heart?" I shook my head in negative with a pout while Mom glared at me.
"That's why you shouldn't do things as you did yesterday night. If you keep on doing stuff like this, Swara will get attached to you and then, at one point in time, you might realize maybe whatever you had for Swara is nothing but an infatuation. First, you should study well and achieve good marks, then make a career for yourself, it will take at least 10 years, right? After 10 years, if you still feel for Swara the same way as now, I promise you I will talk to your Bade Papa, but only if Swara also feels the same way about you."
"Really Badi Maa?" I asked with hope painted all over my face. I know if try to rebel now, in the future, there is no guarantee that the ladies will be on my side. I can't sabotage Swara and her studies by my declaration of Love. That's true. Under no circumstance, my Love should become her weakness.
It should be her strength.
It should be mutual.
And I hope Swara also feels about me the way I feel for her.
"I promise you Badi Maa, I will study hard and will make all of you people proud. Till then, I won't do anything which will make you and Mom lower your heads down. This is my promise." and Sanskar Maheshwari never breaks his promise. After that incident, I distanced myself even more from Swara. I know she could feel it because sometimes she comes and stands near the partition wall and looks at my room longingly, but I can't break down. It's a fucking burning hell. Every day to think that I have to be away from her while she is just a few meters away from me. I didn't attend the second ceremony but got a picture of her from Uttara's cell phone.
My Angel looked like a princess. She wore a sky- blue silk saree with intricate gold zari design all over them and she adorned herself with flower jewelry in the combination of blue, yellow, and white flowers.
Her cheeks smeared with turmeric and sandal paste which made her glow like a moon and her eyes twinkled in happiness. That moment she looked like a bride.
My Bride.
SWARA VASUDEVAN GREAT READY TO BE MY BRIDE... SOON...