I chose to keep silence until the end because I didn't have valor to be honest with my feeling. I connived his curiosity remained without an answer.
Ryan probably will never be changed; remained as a good listener and always reliable. An older brother who'll always there for his younger sister. He knows me so well and understands me better than anyone, except my feeling towards him.
"How lucky I'm to have you by my side", I said softly before getting up and going back to my bedroom.
The imperfection lucks. Yes, I'm so lucky to have him, but it was all in vain because his heart wasn't belonged to me.
For Ryan, I'll forever become one of his family members as well as a boomerang.
Although, I kept trying to accept those facts by ignoring my feeling since I didn't want to lose him, but I remained couldn't apprehend them and didn't want to.
"It's good to heard that from you. I'll always by your side", he replied.
"Remember that and keep it in your mind," he insisted and I nodded.
I felt better after hearing something which I wanted to hear from him.
Before leaving, I checked the wall clock; it was 01.10 AM. For a while, I felt guilty for keeping him awake in the midnight when he had to go to the hospital the morning.
Although regretting chaotic thoughts which confined me, the vent of the hidden thoughts wasn't too bad.
***