~Nolan~
I couldn't believe it.
He kissed me.
My heart was on the edge of bursting from how hard it was hammering in my chest.
It wasn't one sided. He felt it too.
Soon, Reid pulled away, our lips parting made my heart ache.
His eyes grew wide as a look on his face resembling something between embarrassment and regret formed.
"I-I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry I-"
In a swift movement I placed my hand behind his ear and pulled him down to me, kissing him softly. The heat in my cheeks only burning hotter by the second. Reid tensed up, surprised, then I felt him relax under my touch as he kissed me back. God, it felt so good.
Slowly, I pulled away. My eyes met his, searching to find what was going on behind them.
"Please don't apologize for doing something I've been damn near wishing for since I met you."
Reid's eyes grew soft from my words, before closing as he pressed our foreheads together and sighed of relief. I smiled.
"Holy shit..." he let out a nervous laugh.
He took my hand that was still gripping onto his hoodie, and placed it over his chest, letting me feel his heartbeat. It was thumping rapidly beneath the fabric. My jaw dropped.
I did that?
"Mine's the same, don't worry," I laughed.
Reid leaned back into the bed, throwing his arm over his eyes, hiding them.
"I wasn't exactly sure if you liked guys or not," Reid confessed.
"And you still kissed me!?" I exclaimed.
Reid grabbed the pillow behind his head and threw it at me playfully.
I giggled as I raised my arms, shielding myself.
He stopped, laying the pillow in his lap. His head turned to the side bashfully. I hadn't seen Reid blush yet, but I swear I could catch hints of red showing itself in his cheeks.
"...I felt like it was a risk worth taking..."
My heart fluttered with hearing Reid's words. He risked our entire vacation on that kiss, and I was so, so happy he did.
I tilted my head to the side, getting in his line of view.
"...You know I'm bi, right?"
Reid's expression turned to surprise.
"H-How would I have known that!? You didn't exactly mention it," Reid was obviously flustered.
I smiled, then shrugged my shoulders.
"I thought maybe Claire told you. That's why I couldn't tell if you were just playing with me or not."
Reid chuckled.
"I wasn't, I promise. In case you couldn't already tell, I'm gay... Claire knows you're bi?" He asked.
"I'm guessing so,. I mean Griffin is my best bud, he knows, and he and Claire are kinda together, so he's probably mentioned it."
"That's why she's been checking in on me so much!" Reid threw his head back.
I noticed he had a relatively slim, but long neck. It suited him.
"Plus..." I started.
I flopped down, laying face up on the pillow in Reid's lap. He peered down at me, a fond smile laid across his lips.
I looked up at him, meeting his gaze.
"...I'm not really a fan of hiding who I am," I shrugged.
Reid placed his hands on the sides of my face, his thumbs brushing lightly against my cheeks gave me goosebumps.
"Can... can I kiss you again? I wanted to ask at least once..." His voice was low, yet he sounded nervous.
He wanted permission. This boy...
A smile beamed on my face as I nodded my head.
Reid dipped down, and pressed his lips to mine. I gladly returned it, my heart never failing to soar in my chest at his touch.
And we stayed like that, me laying in his lap as we watched movies all day.
I found out that Reid really likes my hair. I had gotten used to him ruffling it every chance he got, but laying in his lap with his hand gently playing with it, I didn't think anything could be better.
***
I hadn't even noticed I was falling asleep until I woke up an hour later, still laying on the pillow.
The room was illuminated with bright orange and yellow hues from the sun setting outside.
I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I shifted my gaze to bed only to notice that, other than me, it was completely empty.
I walked over to the bathroom, confused when I noticed the door was open. Reid no where to be found.
I turned my head to the large glass sliding door that opened to the balcony, and sure enough, Reid was leaning against the railing with his hood up, gazing at the ocean sunset.
I opened the sliding door, joining him.
I leaned against the railing beside him, feeling peace as I studied the colors reflecting off of the ocean's waves.
I looked over to Reid, his focus wasn't on the sunset, but rather a framed photograph in his hand.
It must've been the one he ran inside to grab on the first day.
The picture captured the image of a woman, and a smiling young boy maybe in middle school. It was almost hard to tell that the young boy was Reid, wearing a smile that big. The woman has her arm wrapped around him as he held up what looked like an award. She had beautiful dark skin, and her hair was back in a ponytail. The proud look of a mother was something that no one could overlook, and if Reid was holding onto a picture of her like this, then that must mean...
"...Is that your mom?" I asked him.
Reid nodded.
"She's beautiful," I spoke softly as my gaze held on to the picture.
"Yeah, she was," It was hard to miss the hurt in Reid's voice. Almost as if the pain was tightening itself around his throat.
I was right.
"What was she like?"
A sad smile formed on Reid's lips before he bowed his head, looking down at the picture of him and his mother.
He was silent for a few moments before he slowly turned to me and stepped forward, resting his forehead against my shoulder, hiding his face.
"She was kind..."
Reid's voice was laced with sadness and grief, so much that I found my own eyes beginning to sting with the threat of tears.
"She supported me in everything I did, with everything she had. She was warm, loving, and had the biggest heart. I watched as my dad fell in love with her all over again every single day. She was what made our house a home. She... she protected me from the kids at school when I was bullied. She sat down with me at night as I wrote my stories." Reid chuckled, "I remember asking her, "why are you watching me write? It's weird," and she just smiled, telling me how proud she was to have a son as talented as me... and I didn't..."
Reid's voice cracked.
"I didn't treasure her enough while she was here. She's been gone for years and I still can't get over this guilt."
Reid's shoulders began to shake as I felt the fabric of my shirt become wet. He was crying.
I placed my hand on the back of his head, pulling him closer.
I felt tears of my own welling up in my eyes.
"She knew you loved her, Reid. Your love is all she needed, and she knew she had it. You made her happy."
I heard Reid choke back a sob and I instinctively wrapped my arms around him tight, and buried my face into his shoulder.
"It's okay to cry. If you don't want me to see, I won't look. We can stay like this all night if you need to," I reassured him.
Reid brought up his arms and wrapped them around me as the sounds of his gentle cries filled the air.
I knew he needed this, and I was willing to do whatever it took for him to heal.